More of his lines from Hollywood Squares.
"You're in the woods with a friend and a snake bites him. What's the first thing you should do?"
"Find a new friend."
**
"Anthony Quinn thinks they should be abolished, but he wouldn't turn one down. What are they?"
"Fifty-year-old women."
**
"Can guinea pigs whistle?"
"Only when they come to a boil."
**
"The French call it 'wooden mouth.' What do you call it?"
"I don't know but it'll cost you extra."
**
"The palms of your hand have turned yellow. What have you probably been doing too much?"
"Massaging my gardener."
**
"You walk into somebody's home and everything is brown. What should you think?"
"The maid exploded?"
**
"What would you call a chicken that's cut up, stewed, and served in its own gravy?"
"Mortally wounded."
**
"What fictional character ran around screaming, 'I'm late, I'm late!'"
"That was Alice, and her mother's sick about it."
**
"Julie Andrews said that at the age of twelve she discovered something of hers was as developed as that of a grown woman. What was it?"
"Unfortunately, it was her brother."
**
"True or false. A Canadian doctor successfully transplanted a man's big toe onto his thumb."
"That's how dull it can get in Canada."
**
"At the end of the movie "The Planet of the Apes," what does Charlton Heston see that makes him realize that he is actually in New York City?"
"A Puerto Rican."
**
"You are married in India. How did you probably meet your spouse?"
"We were fighting over a lima bean."
**
"If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?"
"Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark."
**
"Do female frogs croak?"
"If you hold their little heads under water long enough."
