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ROUGH TRADE LOVE AFFAIR

Has anyone ever embarked on an actual love affair with someone who was meant to be a bit of rough trade? I'm having this experience currently. I want to share about what is going on but I am fairly certain it's going to sound like an EST. I guess I will just share the large strokes (no pun intended) and see if it sparks a conversation.

So I rarely drink anymore, but I decided the other night I was going to just let it rip. And because I"m a light weight these days, it didn't take much for me to get pretty loose. At some point the time for calling it a night and going home relatively intact had come and gone. And I was drinking a drink I really didn't need. And then I saw him, at the other end of the bar. Just fucking trash. Hot rough Massachusetts trade.

Having no filter or inhibition, I went over to him and asked if I could buy him a drink. At some point we took it outside and were making out. We ended up at my place and he took control of the sex. He was not drunk and he was a very thoughtful lover with great executive function and he kept it moving. Afterward, we held each other and I let him tell me about his stint in the marines and his time in jail. His trash family and his woodworking skills. He told me about the cot he sleeps on at the shelter and how he was going to be "in trouble" for staying out so late. After a lot more kissing, he left at 4 am. He grabbed one of my sweaters to wear on his bike ride back to the shelter.

The following day I was kind of mortified. It's been a long time since I'd picked up some trade and I live in a college town and it was causing me a bit of anxiety thinking about running into this guy again. And what to I tell my friends or family if he were to ring around my place during the day?

Well he found me on Facebook Messenger, and while I was reading his message to me, I acrtually called him -- through Messenger. I did not know that was a thing you could do? So now I'm totally freaking out.

He calls me back about 60 seconds later. Tells me he's going to ride his bike in to town to eat and invited me. I said no, I wasn't hungry. He said "Just meet me downtown, I want to see you." And.....against my better judgement I hopped quickly in the shower and threw on some jeans and a t shirt and found myself walking down the streat towards the center of town, whereby he was walking toward me from the other direction. And we stopped in the sidewalk. "Hey!." 'Hey."

At this point I feel equal parts horny and guarded. He suggests we get some frozen yogurt.

by Anonymousreply 17August 14, 2025 8:40 PM

0.001

by Anonymousreply 1August 14, 2025 2:02 AM

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

by Anonymousreply 2August 14, 2025 2:05 AM

Don't stop there, OP!

by Anonymousreply 3August 14, 2025 2:08 AM

[cont]He treated. Nice touch. He must have been nervous because as we sat down to eat he was a jacked up, talking loudly and talking about some guy on the bus recently that he had to throw off the bus and almost kick is ass. Classic show of masculinity.

I didn't give energy to that performative display, and slowly he calmed down and we got into a really beautiful conversation about trauma, healing, nature, Buddhism, yoga, being present, intimacy, how to open up to intimacy when you've been hurt/abused/ traumatized (him: military trauma/prison system trauma/poverty trauma); (me: my case my neurotic enmeshed family, child neglect and SA, and a disappeared father).

At some point I am realizing that something is actually happening in my brain and body. I feel knots loosening and starting to become untied. I see things from fresh perspectives. I am sharing words of widsom with this guy, and he too is giving me wisdom. Especially around my ex-husband who he pointed out I kept talking about and blaming for a lot of things. He was showing me that I was not a victim.

We kissed a little on the bench. We were sharing a very intimate exchange of energy, right there, in the light of day, on a bench in town. My money and education was not more valuable than his experience learned in the school of hard knocks. It was really something.

Yesterday this guy writes me on Messenger (He can't call, he hasn't paid his phone bill for a few months) that he wants to experience just *being* with me. And he wants to give me pleasure. And he wants to take me out into the forest with a tent and fuck by the fire, slowly and with intention.

He says I am changing his life and giving him a fresh perspective on everything. I feel way more guarded because I have the power imbalance of having money, a home. education, a false ego that tells me I'm "better" than him some how....but really I have been miserable and bored for a good two years, and this guy is making me feel alive.

I'm considering getting an Air BnB for the weekend, a little cabin or cottage. This is all really crazy. But there is a little part of me that believes in the angel who appears in hobo rags, asking for a bit of human kindness. And the test is if you treat the raggedy angel with love and care, you learn that they were not a vagabond buy a luminous angel after all.

I feel a bit guilty though because he is my exact type to dehumanize into a "type" which is a type that I love to fuck. Aging hardcore/skater/skinhead who had to figure out how to fit into the world and they get some training in a trade but occasionally life overtakes them and they end up hopeless or in jail. They have good intensions but terrible breeding. Half feral, the other half wise like a fucking Buddha. Just raw hot masculine sex for days, but also weirdly vulnerable, and you want to always make sure that they know that they have worth.

I'm pretty excited for the weekend, and also really deeer-in-headlights right now. This was not on my bingo card.

To Be Continued....

by Anonymousreply 4August 14, 2025 2:12 AM

OMG, OP/R4. I think it's time to quit now.

by Anonymousreply 5August 14, 2025 2:29 AM

"So I rarely drink anymore"

We don't start sentences with "So" in this manner, dear.

by Anonymousreply 6August 14, 2025 2:32 AM

Look up the word "brevity," OP.

by Anonymousreply 7August 14, 2025 2:33 AM

This is actually quite good OP/R4. You've come a long way from puny cocklets and shit brick houses.

I'm eager to hear how your next date when on the camping trip and details of being fucked with intention. Please post more!

I think you should support the story with a pic of him. *Just google "gay porn rough trade" and pick one of the images that come up that you like.

by Anonymousreply 8August 14, 2025 2:35 AM

Can i have your stuff after they find your body?

by Anonymousreply 9August 14, 2025 2:36 AM

You’re a lot, OP.

by Anonymousreply 10August 14, 2025 2:37 AM

OP tomorrow "I have no idea why I was greyed out!?"

by Anonymousreply 11August 14, 2025 2:37 AM

I've had a few. They'll never ever be any good. But they filled the time.

by Anonymousreply 12August 14, 2025 2:37 AM

“…and then I woke up.”

by Anonymousreply 13August 14, 2025 4:35 PM

[quote]great executive function

You mean great executive functioning.

by Anonymousreply 14August 14, 2025 5:34 PM

I must say one thing, in my 45+ years of having sex with random men occasionally, the rough trade I've had was the best sex I ever had.

by Anonymousreply 15August 14, 2025 7:31 PM

Oh, I agree r15 !!!

One of mine was a beefy short Irish Bostonian, bisexual and an ex jailbird with bullet hole scars in his body.

Yum!

by Anonymousreply 16August 14, 2025 8:35 PM

Do you have a lot of manic episodes, OP?

asking for your therapist.

by Anonymousreply 17August 14, 2025 8:40 PM
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