Let's Be The Dick Cavett Show

I'm the 1970's

I'm the parade of professional sports figures who hit on Dick backstage.

I'm actual listening

I’m Dick’s many pregnant pauses.

I’m Candide

I'm Janis Joplin

That's not very specific, r5.

I'm Sly Stone, incoherently high as a kite

I'm deadpan delivery.

I’m the smoking.

I’m the caftans.

I’m Better Davis eating ice.

*Bette

I'm droll well-read intelligence, ensuring the guest luminaries know they'll have a good conversation, vanishingly rare on TV. This quality stands up more than well enough to be enjoyed decades later.

Sure, Dick.

I’m Penis Cavett.

I’m Delia Deetz who was never invited to be on the show.

I’m Jack Paar saying, “Bitch stole my act!”

I have a friend whose voice sounds just like chat show host Dick Cavett.

I’m a gay man

I'm Kate Hepburn showing up for a rehearsal the day before taping. I soon begin bossing people around and end up doing the full interview in rehearsal day - a two parter, no less!

I'm the host. I represent myself as a self-deprecating intellectual but actually I'm a talentless celebrity-chasing douche.

I am no George Plimpton!

I'm Groucho Marx

[quote] I’m a gay man

Hi Dick!

I’m Gilbert Gottfried doing an impersonation of Groucho’s cringe interview years later.

I'm Richard Pryor keeping quiet while Dick tells me his thoughts on race and writing for a black man

R7 - R5's post is very specific.

IFKYK

R28 Theme music.

R29 - I know, I was pointing out to R7 that R5's post was specific if you know (you know) the theme music.

I'm glitter and be Gay

I’m Bette Davis’s cigarettes and mod outfits.

I’m the lack of screaming and whooping from the audience.

I'm the smoking and drinking

I'm Lauren Bacall and I am the only one with balls on this stage

I’m Buddy Rich killin’ it:

I'm the shades of brown all over the set, with a pop of orange.

Vintage Dick and James Lipton Actors Studio interviews are the best!

I'm Cavett's British counterpart Robin Day

I’m homophobia. I’m everywhere!

I’m Truman Capote who always made Dick nervous and defensive.

I’m the weirdly uneven monologue.

I'm The Carol Burnett Show

I’m the cat litter he’d have to promote as the show’s sponsor.

I'm Dick's one night stand with Janis Joplin.

Janis was a man?

I’m Jimi Hendrix and I’m tripping.

I'm the interesting array of guests that he had on his show who were allowed to interact with each other

What r22 said

Was he really a douche?

I’m Yoko Ono enjoying my 30 seconds of depth.

I'm an overly full ashtray after Bette leaves the set.

I'm J.I. Rodale, and boy, am I tired.

I'm a very pompous Gore Vidal.

I'm James Earl Jones, really pissed off after Dick made that "calling a spade a spade" crack.

I'm the cheap and tacky coffee table carried off the set by indifferent stagehands when Katharine Hepburn complained about me. The hideous shag carpet quickly followed.

Did Carrie Cavett ever make an appearance?

I’m Dick, dropping names left and right. “As Laurence Olivier once told me . . .”

I’m Dick’s favorite joke—“Spiro Agnew is an anagram for ‘grow a penis.’ “ He was still telling it on talk shows when half the audience probably didn’t know who Spiro Agnew was.

I'm Delia. I'm a flake. I have always been a flake. If I insist on frightening people, I should do it with my sculpture.

I always wanted to fuck Cavett. The elfin look, the wit, the woopsy-doopsy haircut. And the well-modulated voice crooning, "Fuck me, Daddy. Fuck me hard."

I'm a wry riposte!

I'm Grace Slick, giving Cavett major attitude for some reason.

She was a Finch girl. She saw right through Dick.

That’s the reason.

I'm Groucho Marx. Dick worshiped me and gave me full rein of the show when I guested. Even though I tended to ramble in my later years, I still kept them laughing.

I'm Dick Cavett's mysterious wife.

I’m the handbag the ladies bring out, as if they might have to purchase a train ticket or something.

I’m John Lennon in army fatigues.

I’m the unmistakable message that the host is better than you.

I'm Joan Collins

I’m the groovy trousers

I'm the awkward pauses.

I'm Dick's wife Carrie Nye

I'm the civilized and productive political discussions between Republican and Democrats.

I'm the Simpsons guest star

I'm Dick telling Bette Davis that, yes, I'm thrilled you're attracted to me and have agreed to be on my show but, no, I won't be penetrating you at your hotel afterwards.

I'm Dick telling Lester Maddox to get the hell off his stage.

And I'm Lily Tomlin leaving the stage to Dick and Chad Everett.

We're Peter Falk, Ben Gazzara, and John Cassavetes misbehaving and acting like jerks.

I’m drunk

I'm Janis Joplin. I had an affair with Dick!

I’m witty banter

"Why don't you fold it five ways and put it where the moon don't shine?"

[quote]I'm Kate Hepburn showing up for a rehearsal the day before taping. I soon begin bossing people around and end up doing the full interview in rehearsal day - a two parter, no less!

"Can we have a stationary table? NObody listens to me."

^^ the mask slipped that day and we saw capital c Cunt

I’m the segment in which Dick takes off his shirt and pants and shows us his tight little body while he exercises.

See what you missed, R60?

At 1:48 when the trainer tells Cavett to take off his pants: "Cavett c'mon show us Dick willya?!"

Could that trainer be any more gay? What year was this?

I forgot Joe Piscopo used to be hot.

He used to be cute before he went full muscle freak

I'm Dick being effete western

We're the bottles of Prozac in Mr. Cavett's dressing room.

Read Cavett’s memoir Cavett on Cavett years ago. He had worked in summer stock and apparently everyone, male and female, wanted to have sex with him.

^^ Yes! And, in a move that was quite rare at the time, he acknowledged that he let one of the men have sex with him. He wrote something like, "It didn't hurt me and it seemed to bring him a lot of pleasure, so I didn't see any problem with it."

I’m Gloria Swanson and I want to do his head.

R92-Not in Williamstown the summer I was there, they didn't. He was appearing in "Charley's Aunt".

I'm Dick's smug smirk.

The carpet Kate Hepburn hated.

[quote] I'm a very pompous Gore Vidal.

Was there ever a non-pompus Vidal?

[quote] Did Carrie Cavett ever make an appearance?

That's Carrie Nye, darling.

R99. Cough, cough. Got a light?

I'm the improbable assemblage of old and new guard.

I'm Mary McCarthy who singlehandedly ruined my life and career by rightfully calling Lillian Hellman a fraud whose every word, including "the" and "and," is a lie.

I actually loved Mary McCarthy so talented and such screen presence and also her wonderful “life partner” the talented Margaret Linsey.-she was not in enough films.

What a pair of talented women. I hope they were happy.

I am the shockingly sexy body Dick was hiding under his clothes on the show.

I know I was

I'm the cameo appearance in Beetlejuice

Oh My Gosh! I forgot

Helloooooo?

I’ll just leave this here.

R109. Calm down.