Beware the ‘Gen Z gaze’: Young service workers’ refusal to greet customers

I can certainly relate to the 'hostess' post above.

I no longer start the greeting if I'm going into their place of business. If the hostess doesn't know how to 'welcome' an incoming guest who's there to spend money when they approach the host stand, then we're going to have a staring contest until she does. I have all the time in the world.

R1, wouldn’t it be simpler to just turn around and leave? If they don’t want me there, I don’t want to support their business.

I've noticed at my local gym that the kids at the front desk have completely shut down. They don't say hello or goodbye or even acknowledge members when we check in. Not a big deal I guess but it's a little weird.

What I do is strap a smartphone to my forehead with a picture of myself. Gen Z greets my forehead image very interactively and we bond that way.

R2 No. The owners want me/customers there, the servers want us there, the cooks wants us there. Why should the Kardashian Klone at the front door cause everyone in there to lose money ?

As an extreme introvert, in some ways I understand where they are coming from. However, I taught myself years ago to interact with customer-facing employees. It has made my life much better.

Why were they hired for a job they can't do?

As soon as I saw the headline, I knew the story was going to be from the NY Post

They love demonizing "Gen Z" to stir up outrage among their old, conservative readers

It used to be millennials they demonized, then when millennials started reaching middle age they moved onto Gen Z

Why do you listen to the Post when they've been caught making up stories?

R8 If you knew what this thread would be about by the headline, and knew you would disagree with it because of the source, why are you reading it and participating in the conversation ? There's nothing here for you.

If the NY Post still had a paper edition, it would only be suitable for picking up dog poop or lining the bird cage.

Lazy entitled brats with no social skills thanks to their parents……

In today's episode of old men yelling at clouds...

You can understand why Gen Z is so upset about the state of things. It's nearly impossible for them to get ahead in life without major help from their parents. Things weren't anywhere near as expensive in the 80s-early 2000s when some of you were growing up.

Somehow I’ll cope.

R13 yep, some of us mocked the young Bernie Bros of 2016 but they — and Bernie — weren’t so wrong about the big picture, were they.

R13 Rylan is obviously looking for a Sugar Daddy by posting this. Otherwise, he would've driven into that tree by now. Alas, we're stuck with him.

R11 is experiencing the kind of outrage I was talking about

Some of you need to find better news sources. The NY Post kills stories that are critical of Trump appointees and writers who work there say they were told to make up stories about Kamala Harris. They printed so much crap about gays over the years

They want you to hate young people, not the conservative old farts who fought against gay rights every step of the way

They want p

r3, at John Reed in Weho, they make the desk staff say hello and goodbye. It's refreshing.

R18 Who cares ?

What's so ironic about these Zoomers is they know absolutely nothing about the basics of customer service (like a friendly greeting before taking your coffee order), but expect a nice big tip before you leave.

I don't care if it's the Post, my partner and I were just talking about this! I am not a Zoomer basher at all but this is a thing and it's weird. I went to Trailblazers ( pet food) for the first time several months ago. Small store, no other customers, cashier sitting right by the door. I look at her smile, she stares silently. Then looks down. When I return with my purchases she makes no eye contact, no words. Doesn't ask if i want a bag for my 10 cans.

This happened with 3 different clerks, two women and a man I'll call them, although they looked like kids. Of course it's not the end of the world but when you're face to face with zombies it can feel that way.

I was just going to say that r21. Better tip them 30 percent for doing nothing.

[quote]Why were they hired for a job they can't do?

This is especially frustrating when someone from my doctor's office calls to provide important information and I can't understand one freaking word they mumble into the phone.

Haha. I was complaining to a new doctor about his horrible receptionist and then she walks into the room without knocking.

[quote]As an extreme introvert, in some ways I understand where they are coming from. However, I taught myself years ago to interact with customer-facing employees. It has made my life much better.

Walk into a restaurant or shop in France and it's "Bonjour" and "Bonjour.". In Spain, "Buenos días," in Italy, "Buongiorno."

It's simple. Nothing more is required if it's a shop; if it's a host at a restaurant it's a little more of a dance, but barely, and the script is obvious. Introverts and extroverts can can the game on equal terms; no small talk involved.

In the U.S., there's no universal rule or script. The blank stares are the natural evolution

r25 haha

r22 "This happened with 3 different clerks"

Sure, Jan

R10 If? Where have you been?

R28 I'm crushed! Some asshole doubts my story!

You would dare walk into a shop in France without saying a word. You’d get the total stink-eye, and deserve it.

R30 I mean you do seem strangely upset

It's an autistic generation

As soon as I read OP's headline I knew it was a NYPost link. Right-wingers love that shitrag.

I am confused why everyone is upset. I have never had a problem getting help from a Gen Z employee when I ask. But when they greet me when I walk in the store, my first thought is “oh God, I’m going to have to make small talk with a stranger and I would rather kill myself right here right now.”

We sat in the overflow beer garden of a gastro pub.. we went inside to order and were told pur food wid be delivered out soon. A few minutes later this moaning teen girl arrived and started with " its Not fair that ive to bring your food out here". No Hello, no introduction...We were perplexed. I said, shouldn't u be saying that to your boss perhaps? Again she moaned, "This is too far, i shouldn't have to bring out food to this part". It was bizarre but not surprising. My friend told her boss And then as things went wrong with our food, we complained; whereas, if she'd been nicer we wud have let things roll.

r36 What a stupid, made-up story.

R37, typing from her cave.

R13, they were fools who could not even select a decent college major that would allow them to earn a living. Yes, their stupid parents probably allowed them to pick a major that they thought would be "fun". You can't do that anymore. Smart people with a sliver of common sense would be majoring in computer science, AI, or even just becoming an insurance adjuster (no school at all). It's been this way for over 20 years.

If you pick a stupid major, that's your own fault. I suffered through 7 years of college, but I made sure I could most certainly get a job when I graduated. Did I like it? HELL NO. I hated every minute of it. I would have loved to have pursued some stupid, easy major, like most people did. I studied day and NIGHT for 7 YEARS. But I was able to get my 1st job out of college, over the phone. I contacted a district manager & he hired me on the spot. I wouldn't have spent 7 years and $100,000 (back in the late 80's & 90s) to go to school for something I wouldn't be guaranteed to get not only a job, but a good paying job. I'm still guaranteed to get a job.

I don't understand how someone could take out loans for a college major & spend at least 4 years on a degree that will probably not allow them to get a good paying job. That is someone without even a tiny bit of common sense.

“I don't understand how someone could take out loans for a college major & spend at least 4 years on a degree that will probably not allow them to get a good paying job. That is someone without even a tiny bit of common sense.”

I did it: I studied USSR-US foreign policy. A fat lot that did for me after 1990. I turned out just fine—$ and otherwise.

I absolutely prefer quiet service to being tortured by inappropriate chit chat like “any plans for today” or “how is the weekend looking”. I blame Starbucks for starting that with overzealous and false friendliness.

[quote]Why were they hired for a job they can't do?

This weird shift happened where businesses would rather hire younger people who can't and won't ever be able to do the job, rather than hire middle aged people. I know several people who 40 - 55 who can't get jobs, not even entry level jobs. Two are family members. My neighbor told one of them that their employer was hiring. They got an interview and the 2 different inverviewers complained to my family member about all the "young people" that work there and can't do the job, won't do the job & are always on their phones.

My relative said, "you won't have that problem with me, I don't even use my phone on my break - I read books. And what did the company do? They hired somone with no work experience, who quit after a week and then hired someone almost as useless & doesn't want to work. If they'd have hired the 40 years they wouldn't have had that problem. But these companies don't want to hire middle aged people. Recruiters recommend people leave off the dates they attended college. They tell everyone to do that, because these companies only want young employees. Stop doing business with these businesses . They don't care that your experience with their business was terrible.

R13 I stopped reading at " I'm Ryland"....

[quote]I absolutely prefer quiet service to being tortured by inappropriate chit chat like “any plans for today” or “how is the weekend looking”. I blame Starbucks for starting that with overzealous and false friendliness.

That's rather an altogether different problem than having a fucking dead-faced mute give a customer a death stare instead of asking if they would like a table for lunch.

R42 It was like this at my last job. My former boss, an insecure 45 year old college library manager, would never fill positions (librarians, library assistants) with any mature, experienced, secure applicants. It was always the 'younger girls' with no experience who got the jobs (which they didn't deserve). She also made it a blanket policy not to hire males of any age - she was into 'Pink Power' (I was one of three men in that department when I left, out of a staff of 25).

Why ?

Because she felt threatened by the other candidates. She let it slip out once in a conversation I had with her (asking why she always chose the inexperienced youngsters) that she was afraid the older experienced workers would be after her job. Trust me - no one really wanted the job they were applying for, never mind her job. She also felt threatened by males (especially male managers in other departments at the university).

Primatologists have observed that primates, when in a position to observe social behavior between human beings, quickly adopt human social customs with their keepers and caretakers such as nodding hello, greeting with a wave and shaking hands.

Gen Z could and should be expected to rise to (at minimum) this level.

There's been a few times recently I've been to a coffee shop and the staff are doing things behind the counter but no one will acknowledge me or the other people waiting.

Not even a "Sorry, I'll be with you when I've finished this" or "Sorry to keep you waiting", just a complete lack of eye contact and no recognition that we're stood there.

Not surprising, sadly.

That generation truly has no proper social skills...especially when it comes to the working world. Customer service? Bye. You'll never see that valued again. Doesn't surprise me so many places are going to full digital kiosks, etc.

That said, there are some younger folks who do care, and seem to have been taught well... particularly in hospitality and food service. It's usually the girls, not the boys.

[quote] I've noticed at my local gym that the kids at the front desk have completely shut down.

Same. At my new gym, a member finished speaking with the counter worker and walked away. The counter guy didn’t return my greeting and just turned to an approaching instructor and started asking him about helping him work out. No hello, excuse me or just a second.

This went one for a minute or two. He didn’t appear to be hitting on him. Not sure if he’s vain, clueless or bad at his job. Probably all 3.

When I owned my retail store, I hired this one lady who was a few years younger than I for Christmas help. She was very smart, very attractive and very personable. She could always engage with people easily.

One thing I told everyone I hired - do not jump on people as soon as they walk in with a 'how can I help you ?' - give them a good thirty seconds to look around, and then quietly let them know with a smile that you're available should they have any questions.

But she taught me one better - something she learned as a Mary Kay representative, which made her one of the top-sellers in the state. When she was training for MK, her trainer taught her never to meet a new customer for the first time and start the sales pitch or the phony 'Hi, how are you today?' Start off with a compliment - 'Wow! That's a great color on you', or 'I really like that necklace', or 'I love those shoes'. The customer will be happy to hear the compliment, even if they're having a bad day, and they will be inclined to spend money with you even if they had no intention earlier.

So I started doing it with both the men and women who came in the store - for both, I would say 'That's a great color you're wearing today' (best compliment ever), or 'I like that ring you're wearing'. For women, I would compliment their necklace or scarf, for guys I would compliment their necktie. Worked like a charm because you're now letting them know you think they have good taste. They would never leave the store empty-handed, no matter how much they were determined to 'browse'. When they brought their purchase up to the counter, I once again assured them they made a good choice on their purchase. Now you've established 'trust' with the customer (who will most likely return and become a regular), and have begun a business relationship. I don't care if you're in a store selling a box of candy, at a dealership selling a car, or at a restaurant selling the expensive daily specials off the menu - it works. And it's something that these Zoomers need to learn.

Call me crazy, but if I have a staff member who doesn't have all the skills I need them to have - then I train them. Isn't that what management does in order to run a business?

R47 I could've written that myself. The other day, I went into my local Dunkin'. There were two employees working - one was doing 'drive thru' and the other was filling orders from 'the app'. No one approached me or the other customers waiting on the counter. Neither one made eye contact. Neither one said, 'Be with you in a minute'. Just ignored this small group of people with money in their hands. I finally walked out, and when I got to my car I noticed the others did, too.

R51 'Training' went away decades ago. No one is 'trained' any longer. You just copy what other workers do on your own - no one trains you and teaches you right from wrong. If you pick up 'wrong way of doing things' from others, no one cares.

When I went to get gas earlier, the pump wasn't working. I went inside and the young guy was so nice.

[quote]Start off with a compliment - 'Wow! That's a great color on you', or 'I really like that necklace', or 'I love those shoes'.

This would immediately put me off, it's such an obvious and obsequious ploy.

r54 You seem fun.

I got one at my insurance provider. It was almost comical. I had a simple query about which of my two plans would cover something. It was like dealing with a petulant teen: one-word, unhelpful answers and attitude.

I called the other insurance co and got a husky voiced woman who went above and beyond. She called the other bitch’s insurance co and did her job for her in a few minutes.

Needless to say, the asshole worker knew nothing and was wrong.

[quote]That said, there are some younger folks who do care, and seem to have been taught well... particularly in hospitality and food service. It's usually the girls, not the boys.

I find the opposite - it's the guys not the girls.

I was in a local restaurant I frequent all the time, waiting off to the side to pick up a pizza. There were two college age girls working the counter. An older man came in to pick up his pizza, and very nicely congratulated one of the girls for graduating college. She asked how he knew, and he reminded her she was friends with his grand-daughter who also graduated a few weeks ago. His grand-daughter used to work there, he reminded her. He made nice polite conversation with her. She just nodded and stared at him and gave him his change, which he put in her tip cup (over $5 he got back).

Once he left, she's telling the other girl he made her uncomfortable, and he was 'being creepy' with her. She told them next time he comes in, she's not waiting on him because he 'creeped her out'. WTF ?

The other girl ignored her and kept walking back and forth saying, "I'm gonna kill myself right now" because they had so many pizza orders that night.

[quote]I'm gonna kill myself right now

Don't leave us in suspense, r57!

This one other time I had left a 5$ tip for a young girl at a sandwich shop. She so politely said "Oh my gosh, are you sure? Thank you so much!!"

I think the essential takeaway from this thread is that Gen Z like every generation that came before and every generation that will follow comprises many, many different personality traits, some shared and some unique to the individual.

I notice it all the time. Gen Z restaurant workers refuse to acknowledge customers. You now have to go on a quest to get one to pay attention to you, utterly bewildered as to why you want to spend any money or have any questions.

R60 I agree with you to a degree. I think it's a little different from past generations because past generations didn't have social media, and so easily influenced by bad social behavior from reading 'X" and "Tik Tok".

R59 As soon as you left, she went on her phone, pulled up her social media, and wrote:

Like I'm literally going to kill myself right now. This old guy came in and was like literally acting so creepy! Like, he freakin' ordered a sandwich and when I gave it to him, he like literally gave me a $5 tip and literally creeped me out. Like I'm going to kill myself right now. WTF?"

And she got a lot of likes for that. And she ignored all the other customers in line, waiting to be served so she could share this creepy experience with her friends.

I know this so well. But I admit, when I would go into small stores and they greet me, I instantly feel guilty when there is nothing I want and then I want to leave but they greeted me nicely.

I have to confess that "Any plans for today?" in a bright cheery voice drives my crazy, but I get it from Gen Zers all the time - they're not all zombies.

FFS, don't be so delicate. Just look at the person, say "Good morning" or "Hello," warmly, crispy, or in a perfectly neutral tone as you please. Then have a look around the shop and leave with a "Thanks," or say nothing.

To not give the least acknowledgment of another person in this situation suggests that your have some sort of psychiatric defect, shyness, hauteur, whatever. You don't need to lock eyed with the clerk or staff, just say Hello while turning your eyes in their general direction. It's not as though this exchange has much opportunity of advancing to sex and then, oh god, to dancing. You needn't go for a swim in their eyes, just give the simple courtesy of acknowledging their presence by pointing your gaze toward them, even for a millisecond. Otherwise you're a savage and unfit for venturing into the world.

R11=Carlo, as he beats Connie.

[quote]I know this so well. But I admit, when I would go into small stores and they greet me, I instantly feel guilty when there is nothing I want and then I want to leave but they greeted me nicely.

Oh, let me tell you - as a former small retail business owner, I assure you nothing to feel guilty about. Around 80% of the people who came in my store each day were 'professional browsers' (which they are called in the industry).

Before leaving, please turn to the owner or worker and say such things as the following (because professional browsers think it softens the blow of wasting our time and touching everything in the store):

"I'll be back, I' sure..."

"Nothing today, but maybe tomorrow !"

"This is my favorite store to browse in."

"Next time, when I win the lottery !"

"Just knowing this beautiful store exists makes me so happy !" (Say this with an ear-to-ear grin with hands in prayer position, and then bow to the person before leaving.).

(Pile up a bunch of expensive merchandise on the counter, then let the owner and sales person ring it up and start wrapping / bagging it. When they tell you the total and ask how you're paying, say with a hearty laugh...) "Oh I'm not buying any of this. I just want to pretend I'm rich !"

My friend and I met up at a popular, casual family restaurant tonight for dinner (it's been around since the 70s, serving 'comfort food'). There was no host tonight, so that bartender shouted out for us to 'seat ourselves'. A handsome young man in his 20s, whom I've seen a couple of times in the past, placed menus in front of us without saying a word or looking at us. Okaaaaay.

An attractive young lady with red hair and green eyes was our waitress (she had to be in her mid-20s). I believe she was rather new, as we never saw her in there before. She came up to the table with a small electronic device in her hands (to put our order in) and just stared down at us. No greeting, no introducing herself, no nothing - not a word. Not a single word. Just stared down at us sitting in the booth. (Her name tag said 'Rylee'). Finally, I met her gaze and asked, "May we help you with something ?" She responded flatly, "Do you two know what you want to drink ?" After she brought our drink orders, she asked flatly, 'Do you know what you're ordering ?" We gave our order, and a short while later the cute guy (his name tag said 'Axel') brought out our dinners - again, no eye contact and not a word was spoken from his lips. No one came by to ask if our dinners were okay, if we needed anything else, or if we needed refills on our drinks. Nothing.

We weren't quite through with our dinners, when the waitress plops the check on our table. Again, Rylee had nothing to say to us. I guess we're not having after-dinner drinks, coffee or one of their usually delicious home-made desserts tonight. She's passively telling us to go. At the bottom of the check were three suggested 'tip amounts'. 20%, 25% and 30% is what the check suggested on a nearly $70 check, service provided by their mute staff members. Sorry - 15% was more than enough for the service we received. My friend and I work too hard for our money to reward bad service.

[quote]At the bottom of the check were three suggested 'tip amounts'. 20%, 25% and 30% is what the check suggested on a nearly $70 check, service provided by their mute staff members. Sorry - 15% was more than enough for the service we received. My friend and I work too hard for our money to reward bad service.

FFS, I would have left nothing. Unless the restaurant was a training facility reward flat affect sufferers the permanently rude, and beaten dogs who can't look a person in the eye (or even in the general direction), fuck them.

*training facility for flat affect....

R70 She and the cute guy didn't offer 'bad service', they just didn't offer personable service (as I described). There's a big difference. Introducing themselves, making eye contact, smiling, telling us the specials - that's personable service. They offered 'average' service -so they get an 'average' 15% tip from us. I'm sure she went on her phone and posted my friend (a female in her mid-60s) and I were 'creepy', and ranted she gave excellent service and we gave her a bad tip. (They all believe they give excellent service).

r69 What convenient timing for your "story."

PS - I know I said 'bad service' in my original post, but I should have said 'average service' or 'unfriendly / non-personable service' to be more accurate.

R73 You really need to ask your healthcare workers to clean you up, dress you up and take you out of your room more often, if ever. You need some social experiences.

It began with "no worries" in response to a "thank you," rather than "your welcome," and it's been downhill ever since.

R36, its 100% true. Why on earh would someone make up that story ? You big cynic.

Some real delicate flowers here.

If someone has some acute affectation where they are able to deliver a plate to a table yet unable to make anything vaguely resembling eye contact or looking, however fleetingly, in the direction of the customer to utter a few simple and necessary words, fuck their tip.

I'm don't require or want a friendly demeanor or a bright smile measured on some sincerity scale, but is it too much to that that the service not be unpleasant and without psychiatric tics? Why give them 15% to leave them thinking the fault is yours for being "cheap", leave nothing to be emphatic in indicating that they were lousy at their job? If they dared open their mouths to complain I would explain exactly why.

I've had shy and socially awkward waiters and waiters who were a bit terrible but did try, and I always tipped them well. But one who averts his gaze like a whipped dog or needs to be prompted to ask how she can be if help either needs to learn some restaurant skills or stay inside his padded room.

delicata dentata

[quote]But she taught me one better - something she learned as a Mary Kay representative, which made her one of the top-sellers in the state. When she was training for MK, her trainer taught her never to meet a new customer for the first time and start the sales pitch or the phony 'Hi, how are you today?' Start off with a compliment - 'Wow! That's a great color on you', or 'I really like that necklace', or 'I love those shoes'. The customer will be happy to hear the compliment, even if they're having a bad day, and they will be inclined to spend money with you even if they had no intention earlier.

That's FAKE. You know who says things like that? Used car sales people. Honestly