Diddy Freak Off Escort, Shawn Dearing

Now he looks rode hard, and put away wet!

A former male escort hired to perform at Sean “Diddy” Combs’ “Freak Off” parties has broken his silence after prosecutors showed his photo during the music mogul’s federal sex trafficking and racketeering trial. In an exclusive interview with PEOPLE, he shared an emotional message for Casandra “Cassie” Ventura.

Shawn Dearing was one of more than 10 men Combs, 55, allegedly forced his ex-girlfriend to have sex with during their nearly 11-year relationship, according to prosecutors. The escorts’ identities were revealed in court testimony and evidence submitted by the government.

“She was so uplifting — the kindest and most respectful person," Dearing, 37, says of Ventura, 38. “She was genuine throughout the whole experience."

Dearing tells PEOPLE that he is only speaking out now to give "some credence" to Ventura's story and because his photo and alias were already made public during Combs' trial.

“I never wanted to open my mouth,” he says. “I don't seek attention. I don’t want to go out there and make it seem like I’m trying to get my name known off of this experience."

When discussing Ventura, he says, “You got me tearing up! I want what’s best for her, honestly, because she … she's a badass lady, man. She's awesome. So I want her respect first and foremost.”

He's a very rough 37 if in fact he's 37.

"I'm so totally inspired by the victim I raped for hire."

Any peen pics out there?

Oof, aged like milk.

He is pleasant looking not sleazy, but he was never hot

That’s 37 if he’s on meth. It’s possible.

Stop complaining. I hope I'll look like that when I'm 57.

He's still handsome, and he looks younger than his actual age.

So he's packing then, right?

R10 - he does NOT look younger than his age - he looks 10+ years older.

He's just aging like an English rose.

Some of you have poor reading comprehension skills. Diddy is 55, and Shawn the escort is 37.

^ No kidding, Rose. Look up humor and sarcasm before posting.

My pussy stinks!

A former escort allegedly hired by Sean “Diddy” Combs for "more than a dozen" of the music mogul's “freak offs” with Cassandra “Cassie” Ventura says "the tone" of the sex parties changed over time.

“I just would say overall, the tone was a little darker towards the last times I'd seen them," Shawn Dearing claims in an exclusive interview with PEOPLE.

“I got to see the dark side of things," the model, 37, adds.

Ventura’s attitude during those final “freak offs” was, “I'm here, I have to perform. Let's do this," Dearing alleges.

"It was more of a ‘doing this to please him’ type of spirit overall," he notes. "I can tell when the energy was different."

Ventura, 38, "was playing her role," Dearing claims. "It was evil ... and she was under that."

Dearing continues, "In my opinion, in that situation, she didn't know if this was a beast she could control or not anymore. So she was along for the ride, because she had to, because who knows? Who knows where this beast is going, and there's no way to tame it.”

Dearing says Combs first hired him in late 2014 or early 2015 through the website Cowboys4Angels and that he did not know the identity of the client beforehand.

He claims he was booked for "more than a dozen" sessions with Combs and Ventura, which typically took place at either a bungalow at The Beverly Hills Hotel or a condo off Sunset Blvd. in Los Angeles that he believes belonged to Ventura.

After leaving escorting behind in 2017 and moving back to his home state of Hawaii, Dearing says Combs tried to hire him again. He passed.

“I just kind of had to do a lot of personal soul searching, in a sense,” he explains. “I stepped away from that, realizing it was darker. Because honestly, I do care about these ladies. So I had to step away."

Dearing adds, “I never thought that [escorting] was part of my life plan."

Though he is "on a different path these days," Dearing says he is unfazed by others' opinions of him.

"The truth is, I don't care what anyone says about me," he shares. "If people would want to think negative thoughts about me, that's on them.”

If this was him (filed in 2015 when he was 28), he probably really is 37.

I know an escort in MA who turned 51 last month. He still advertises on the 'Rentmen' site as 34. I first hired him 20 years ago, and he was not 14.

I hire a 'traveling escort' about 3 - 4 times a year, when he visits my area. He advertises as 32. He's at least 15-18 years older - at least. He's incredible for a 50 year old, but there's no way clients are believing he's 32 when they meet him in person. Male escorts lie about their age ALL the time and they don't know how to stop.