The Gays and Tennis, Part 184 Roland-Garros

If Novaxx makes it to the quarters, he'll have done so without having had to face any player currently ranked in the top 80.

Who’s the handsome young man sitting next to Shelton’s father?

I know, in theory, Novaxx should easily beat Norrie, but if Norrie keeps up the form he's shown over the past two weeks I can see him causing a lot of trouble. If Cam can extend rallies and move him around it could get interesting: Novak's looked like he's desperate to keep rallies and games as short as possible.

If Norrie can get an early set, I would give him a 40% chance of winning. He did take a set off him in Geneva 2 weeks ago.

[quote] Who’s the handsome young man sitting next to Shelton’s father?

A WTA player!

Carlitos advances.

Time for Carlitos to batten down the hatches. He can't keep going walkabout in the middle of matches.

Could be a fascinating match in the next round - Tommy's beaten him twice.

Shelphone did well. Better than expected, especially considering he played Alcaraz on clay.

Ewww. TNT has Novaxx in for a chat on the desk.

I made the mistake of subscribing to Max/TNT for live RG coverage this year. Never again. The obnoxious commercials every 5 minutes or so make it so bad that instead of watching live, now I just wait to watch the match on Tennis Channel later, uninterrupted.

The host on the TNT desk, Adam Lefkoe, has to be the absolute worst I've seen. He's just obnoxious, and asks the dumbest questions. He knows everything about basketball and nothing about tennis, and keeps asking players about basketball.

Is he worse than Chris Fowler, noted tennis expert?

Agree on Lefkoe, dear Jesus he's awful. This whole thing of trying to make tennis into basketball via this bro thing. Dear god, it's awful.

Will Timothee Chalamet now attend the men’s final?

Lefkoe is entirely out of his realm. He needs to be removed.

and while we're at it, I can do without the co-hosts as well. Time for a major rethink.

Caroline Woz is so vapid, too, gosh. I love tennis but these players are so dumb.

Alex Faust is handsome, wow.

Why do they look like a couple?

Oh, Danny, it was sweet while it lasted.

Props to Big Foe - he's been locked in every round this tournament.

[quote] I love tennis but these players are so dumb.

He’s name is spelled Dzumhur!

R7. Evonne ‘Walkabout’ Goolagong Cawley is my all-time favorite woman player. At her best she was an Ali: float like a butterfly, sting like a bee—effortless, BUT! I hope Carlitos avoids that BUT.

Lore

Woon

Evonne was class. Absolutely beloved by the Wimbledon crowds.

Lore/Woon = Class/Ass

During the Runs match, Courier had to correct his co-commentator about the shot clock rules.

This is very cute.

Given the comments here, I’m just going to watch the repeats on Tennis Channel except for the men’s final.

Goolagong reached 17 Grand Slam singles finals in the 1970s. She won only 6…due to her infamous walkabouts. She won another in 1980.

But for Evonne's injury in 1978 in the Wimbledon semis, Martina would be short at least 1 or 2 Wimbledon titles.

Rune such a fighter. Four games in a row from 0-3 down.

Wonder what Ben was whispering? "Wanna fuck later?" Joking. But seriously; they have a ton of chemistry. I have wondered about both Ben and Carlitos in the past, I think they're both bi.

R30 Errrm no.

Rune was 2-0 down and then broke back for 2-1. It's gone on serve since then.

I hopr the homophobic brat loses. Can't have homophobes winning during Pride.

Grace under pressure.

Lore takes the first set.

Who are the browns, yellows and whites?

Does Rune have any body hair?

[quote] Does Rune have any body hair?

I certainly hope not.

Maybe he’s not anatomically correct.

[quote] Maybe he’s not anatomically correct.

Maybe he’s actually Martina Hingis.

That was cruel, R40.

[quote] That was cruel

You’re welcome.

Gotta say, Rune has been impressive in how he’s fought back in this match.

Even a limp dick is semi-hard once a day…

*remains unbothered*

Lore v. Woon into fourth set.

Musetti looks so much better with shorter hair and a beard. I never thought twice about him before and now I’m transfixed.

The fiery shot-making is much appreciated too.

[quote] and a beard

To better cover up his massive chin mole.

Time run wrong…over soon

Rune run wrong

Altmaier looked hot, even losing, on tv…he’s got a future.

For the DL neo-Nazi skin trolls: know that he is Ukrainian-Russian.

Musetti ahead 4-1 in the fourth.

5-1...

Altmaier turns 27 in a few months. That's well into middle age in ATP years, and his ranking peaked at 47 a couple of years ago. Pretty sure his future is behind him.

Wet Mussy!

Why was Maier replaced?

Lore advances. I prefer Lore over Brat, but will miss the hairless eye candy with a face covered in foundation.

2 brats out today, tomorrow it's the turn of the Great Satans!

RFC team or Griekspoor team?

Norrie team or Novaxx team?

Bublik Enemy team or Captain Jack team?

Il Gingio team or Woobie team?

Tallon Team

Norrie/Never Novaxx Team

Captain Jack Team

Il Gingio (Novaxx Insurance) Team

Me like Tallon!

Now & Never: No Novaxx.

Why was the handshake betqeen Tiafoe and Latamier so icy? Do they have beef?

I'm so so so disappointed in my two girls Paolini and Rybakina.

Shite happens R64 we can’t win them all.

I’m deeply in love with Lore.

I'm so happy Musetti won and not the homophobe. It's Pride after all.

The (original) Rainbow flag is up and flowing, on the roof of the Google building in Chelsea.

After watching the (fantastic) Alcaraz-Shelton match, three thoughts:

1. I really really like Ben Shelton. Terrific player, terrific fight, great attitude. I loved the way he smiled even when he lost points. Never gave up. Just seems like a super nice guy. (Have watched him play in person, and he exudes...niceness.) I wanted them both to win.

2. As someone above asked, who is the super handsome person sitting next to Ben's father in the coaching box?

3. Every time they flashed on Alcaraz's coaching team, I just thought Except for Alcaraz's father (and creepy agent), these guys could all march straight into a porn scene. Do you think Carlitos kneels for bukkake from his team as a reward each time he wins?

No, I think not.

You type like a fool.

Balls!

Women's tennis is so annoying, every match should be just the 3rd set.

Unknown Frenchlez, Boisson, giving JPeg trouble and keeping French hopes alive... for now.

JPEG BROKEN!

BOISSON SERVING CUNT!

Uh-o, Pegleg

Vive la France

WOW!

Boisson was amazing! Number 350 something and she was nerveless in that last game!

Just realised that Boisson was the Frenchwoman that Poison Hag Harriet Dart insulted a few weeks ago.

Way to get the last laugh.

Dart has not won a single match since that rude comment…

[quote]Just realised that Boisson was the Frenchwoman that Poison Hag Harriet Dart insulted a few weeks ago

Yeah, I forgot that was her

Being able to choose which match to watch on Max is wonderful… but they need to learn to prioritize certain matches so we don’t have to sort through a gajillion juniors and doubles matches to find the big singles matches.

Big Jack is playing now!

Just in the last year….

One year ago (Spring 2024) Loïs Boisson had her tennis dream dashed.

After tearing through the third rung of professional women’s tennis, the French Tennis Federation (FFT) awarded Boisson a wild card for the French Open. A week before, at a minor tournament in Paris, Boisson tore her anterior cruciate ligament in her left knee and missed nine months of tennis. She didn’t even watch the tournament on television.

1 set all.

If - a big if - Bublik can keep up this intensity, I can't see Jack winning this. His service games are becoming impenetrable.

And kudos for Bublik's coach.....Momma likes

Bublik's dropshots are driving Jack INSANE.

Useless Jack—not of all trades…

Djokovic steamrolls the British no. 2.

Actually, Norrie's the British No. 3 by ranking. Novaxx still to play a top 50 player this RG - what a joke.

holy jeeeez this is tense... both these guys are tight! C'mon Jack!

BIG JACK D WITH THE DROPERRRR

Ha ha. Just Jack! Too bad

Insane last game.

Can't stand Bublik but you have to hand it to him - when he's on, he's almost unstoppable.

My nightmare scenario is that he continues the streak past Sinner, but then the train comes off the track in the final against Novaxx or The RFC.

"Wha'... wa'... tha'..."

R93 that’s not even a possible final? You too dumb, for sure.

I meant semi. My mistake. Twat.

The correct answer: thank you for correcting my stupid post.

If you hadn't been an obnoxious asshole in the way you pointed it out, then you would get a polite response.

The shoe fit this time—wear it.

It's 'the shoe fitS, dumbass.

It’s IF the shoe fits. If the shoe does in fact fit, then it’s not “fits.” Get it?

This thread has turned cuntier than a Harriet Dart match.

"The correct phrase is "the shoe fits you this time" if you're referring to the idiomatic expression "if the shoe fits, wear it". This phrase means that if a criticism or description is accurate, you should accept it or wear it, according to Cambridge Dictionary. The verb "fit" needs to agree with the subject "the shoe" and the possessive "your" to indicate ownership, says Quora."

Just fuck off. Please me on ignore.

*put Before you obviously feel the need to correct me.

R203 the conditional takes the “s”, the actual does not.

103^

Take it up with the Cambridge Dictionary:

"The correct phrase is "the shoe fits you this time" if you're referring to the idiomatic expression "if the shoe fits, wear it". This phrase means that if a criticism or description is accurate, you should accept it or wear it, according to Cambridge Dictionary. The verb "fit" needs to agree with the subject "the shoe" and the possessive "your" to indicate ownership, says Quora.

For example, if someone says "You're always late," and you respond with "Well, if the shoe fits you this time," it means you're acknowledging that the criticism is accurate for you in that specific instance.

Elaboration:

"If the shoe fits" idiom:

This is a well-known idiom meaning that if something applies to a person, they should accept it.

Subject-verb agreement:

The verb "fit" must agree in number with the subject "the shoe." In this case, "fits" is the correct form because "the shoe" is singular. Ownership:

The possessive pronoun "your" indicates that the criticism or description is applicable to you.

Example:

Using "the shoe fits you this time" is a more natural and grammatically correct way to express the idiom than "the shoe fit this time".

Girls, girls, you’re both cunts!

You’re on repeat… please turn yourself off and do a re-boot.

'Cunt' I will happily accept, 'dumb' I will not!

Tomato, tomahto

R07 I’m from Cambridge—I don’t need any bullshit Chatbot copy & paste to tell me about the Cambridge “answer.”

R107

shut up, you cunt!

So so happy that Draper lost. Hooray!

Sad for Jpeg she is one of my fave gals on the circuit

Im really liking Bublik's game. What a player. So confident with these drop shots. Killer shots!

I can't wait to see Novaxx out but wish it would be to a lower ranked player, and not Zverev

Prayer circle for Carlos tomorrow because Tommy P is a dangerous player

Not sad for JPEG.

Löis is more butch than 95% of this place…r107 most of all

Lois is lez right?

🧐

Löis!

Loïs!

Hi, Lois!

Sinner and 107 are tied for “Most Boring on the 2025 ATP circuit.”

Sinner looks like that Zizian guy.

R123, I didn’t know who the Zizian guy is, but I Googled him. You are correct.

Luvly Lore Team or Big Foe Team?

ODS Tommy Team or Carlitos Team?

Musettimi.

Carlitos team.

luvly cakes

Is young Grigor’s career over? He seems out of gas since his 6-0 6-0 loss to de Minaur.

[quote]Is young Grigor’s career over?

Yes.

Team Lois! Just watched the match.

Lois team.

Loïs!!

Loulou!

Lois is butchtastic

Équipe Loulou!

She-Hulk team or Zheng team?

Svit team or Svee team?

She-Hulk+

Loïs!!

Zheng Team

Svit Team

Zheng (never Sabalenka) Svitolina (slava Ukraini!)

r136 Team She-Hulk!

Just realized Lindsey Davenport is a commentator for this match. (I haven't been watching the tournament until this morning.)

She-Hulk ftw!

I cannot believe Jack lost. I'm so sad. Literally EVERYONE I was rooting for have lost now. Fml. And I'm baffled Jack could lose to that headcase Bublik. Wtf?! What an embarrassement. And he is supposed to be part of the new "top 3"? What a joke.

[quote]I cannot believe Jack lost. I'm so sad. Literally EVERYONE I was rooting for have lost now.

MARY!!!!!!!

R143 Did you watch the match?

Happy to see that it's Zverev vs Djokovic in one of the QF's... so one of them will be knocked out. Then hopefully Sinner takes care of the winner of that match in the SF.

Lovely Lore leaps into the lead - takes the first set comfortably: 6-2.

She-Hulk vs. Iga ... who wins?

I’m rooting for Iga but I’m afraid that, unless Sabalenka gets her serve yips back, this is Sabalenka’s match to lose.

That's what I'm thinking, r149.

I think it will be a three-setter though.

FORZA LORE!

Bit of a limp final set from Big Foe, after a competitive first 3 sets.

I guess it's a good thing that the men at the top have been pretty consistent in the Slams so far this year, with 5 of the 8 quarterfinalists repeating in Oz and RG (Sinner, Alcaraz, Tommy, Satan, and Satan Jr.), but it's also a bit blah. I liked the days when the French Open meant we'd see the clay specialists shake things up a bit more.

Ooh, Paul!

Mamma like 🥰

Set 1... oops

Looks like I'm gonna need to zip out to RG and comfort OSD Tommy Boy tonight. Maybe some extra massage on that upper thigh.

Ya do what you gotta do.

Amelie keeps scheduling dud matches in prime time.

Tommy, can you hear me? Tommy, can you see me? Tommy?

You're so right, r156. This was clearly going to be a dud. Too bad you're not there to set her straight.

Set 2... we have an upgrade!

Poor Tommy. He's not even playing poorly.

Poorly-played Pussy

Carlito's shorts should get somebody fired. Completely unflattering and they're riding up, to boot.

Tommy should lend Carlitos a pair of his.

I can't stand Carlos' "Where's Waldo?" shirts! The kits this RG have been tres underwhelming!

Now I'm wondering how man **games** Musetti will win against Carlos. Holy jeez is this guy good.

Il Gingio Team or Bubbles Team?

Novaxx Team or RFC Team?

Luvly Lore

He could use a little time in a dentist’s chair

Il Gingio Team

Sinkhole on Chatrier Team

[quote]He could use a little time in a dentist’s chair

better yet, he could sit on my face

Il Gingio team

RFC team

I appreciate your asking.

This French Open is a good example of something I've realized over the years, which is: early upsets in a Slam are a ton of fun, as are long marathon 5-setters, but they can make the later stages of the tournament really dull. I think Tommy might have been gassed today. And I'll be surprised if Bublik wins 4 games against Sinner; Draper would have been so much more fun. (Watch me eat my words!)

I remember a couple years ago Bublik got routed by Sinner, and at the end of the match he shook Sinner's hand and said "You are not a human!"

Found a video!

Flip side of that though, R171, is that it gives us the opportunity to see who's on the horizon. For me, seeing the 1990 French Open top two seeds Edberg and Becker get knocked out by newbies Bruguera and Ivanisevic was more fun than seeing the same old faces. Plus we still got some good matches in the final rounds.

The first set of Gauff v. Keys has been painful to watch. Both women have been battling themselves more than their opponent.

Are you Team Madison or Team Coco, r174?

With so much shit happening in the world right now, Lois Boisson is the Cinderella story I need. I hope she wins the tournament.

R175, I love both but I think I’m cheering a little more for Keys, just because she’s older and has less time to win Majors. And you?

Same, r177. I think it will be a three-setter.

Maddy survives the first set Demolition Derby.

I’m glad the camera didn’t pan to Coco’s mother after Coco’s double faults in the tiebreaker.

Looks like we're getting three sets

Maybe I spoke too soon at r181

And just when it looked like Keys was going to take control of the second set, she quickly relinquishes it.

Coco can’t seem to buy a first serve, ugh.

You were right, r181.

Coco ftw!

I’m happy for Coco but, geesh, that was an ugly match.

Tippy folded like a card-table in the 3rd set.

And they wonder why they're not the night match.

ALLEZ LOÏS!

Back on serve!!

Come on Lois!!!

BLIMEY!

Boisson looks like a butch Genevieve Bujold. Stunning.

LOIS, YOU'VE GOT THIS!!!!

Get used to me winning gays!

Ca marche!

WOW WOW WOW.

As much as I was rooting for Boisson, got to feel for Andreeva. That was a painful implosion.

Good luck Coco; Lois is coming for it

I bet Harriet Dart has decided she, too, needs to toss all her deodorants.

Loïs, honey! I'm free for doubles at Wimby! Call me!"

Totally agree, R173. I do love the upsets early on, first week, and it's so fun to see the guys who are making a big move. Even if it only lasts a year or two.

Buh-bye!

Lots of these men’s matches have been snoozefests.

Bagel Bublik

I’m RFC team. Never Novaxx.

Why can’t Johnny Mac pronounce Zverev? He says, Zuh-verev.

Because he's an old, lazy cunt who does no research and just phones it in?

Glad that Warner Bros Discovery has reinvented grand slam coverage by… leaning on the McEnroe brothers again.

I expect the BBC will reunite the trifecta of cunts for their Wimbledon Men's Final coverage: Jonny Mac, Brit 'never was' Andrew Castle, and has been Nick Kyrgios - who announced today, to massive shock - that he won't be playing.

Yay! RFC won the first set.

This butch Boisson chick is fantastic. A SF as a wild card and up nearly 300 spots in the rankings as a result (and doesn't have to qualify for Slams for at least the next year). Players that low don't even usually get wild cards, but she got one because she had one last year (at a higher ranking) and had to pull out right before due to injury. Will this be her career highlight or will be be at least a semi-consistent presence? She's like Sam Stosur, Sakkari, and Jen Brady rolled into one.

[quote]This butch Boisson

Amelie, is that you?

^^ She looks like Mauresmo and Gasquet had a kid. She's got some of Mauresmo's butchness and is built like Gasquet with breasts, including his long neck and thick and slightly bowed legs.

Ugh. “Nole” wins second set.

Novaxx reading The RFC's game too easily - you can see that he's a move ahead in most rallies.

She-Hulk pegging her boyfriend...

She-Hulk seems like she would be sexually voracious and potentially lethal.

Tell her to lose my phone number.

That was an amazing point!

R220, a 41- shot rally—best point of the tournament so far!

I don’t know if Novak can sustain this level of play— even if he wins today he has to then face Sinner and potentially Alcaraz — but this match today against Zverev has been vintage Djokovic with impressive consistency and precision.

"She-Hulk seems like she would be sexually voracious and potentially lethal."

Agreed. Shes strikes me as a classic straight girl horny jock who loves sex. That's not a type that doesn't gets a lot of recognition - it's either dyke jocks on one end and straight girly girls on the other. But it's definite subset of straight chicks.

^^ Sorry. I meant "not a type that gets a lot of recognition."

Finally I can post

Why couldn’t you, R225?

Murder by dropshot.

It’s over.

Novaxx

She-Hulk team or Svee team?

Loïs team or CoCo team?

Lois is kez right?

Oh no, Novaxx is going to win??

She hulk dated Berrentini???

She-Hulk Team

Loïs team

Équipe Boisson, j'adore!

The RFC is basically the ultimate loser.

R236 So true. Given how highly touted he once was (and how highly he still thinks of himself), he really is just a big, sad, underachieving flop.

Um, not that I'm his biggest fan, but he is number 3 in the rankings...not too shabby in the overall scheme of a career.

[quote] The RFC is basically the ultimate loser.

[quote] he really is just a big, sad, underachieving flop.

Flopos Zverev

F. Zverev

Lets go CocoPuffs!

So conflicted CocoPuffs is my girl but I have a new favorite and her name is LOIS BOISSON!

R238 True, I shouldn't dismiss that. But he was expected to be a multiple slam winner at this stage in his career. Granted, he had that injury a couple of years ago the interrupted his momentum but he should be in his prime now and at least beating Novaxx (if not Sinner or Alcaraz). He can't even get past Daddy Fritz at a slam!

God I hate Novax.

Please let Sinner or Carlitos put a stop to this asshole. 🙏🏼

🙏 for a 6-0, 6-0,6-0 result in the Sinner/ Djokovic match

Please bagel this asshole Jannik!

Coco Team

Lois Team

Big Sab team

Jannik Team

Alcaraz Team

Chris Everett did a really shitty job calling that Boisson/ Andreeva match. You were so off Chrissypoo

Novax has to go through Sinner, Musetti/Carlos. Tough road ahead

DL icon Taylor Townsend- TT is in the finals of a mixed double match with fellow American King.

They play against Errani and Vavasorri. All American team VS all Italian team

Zverev needs to retire after this match. Soft POS, passive shots. I'm sure he hits his women hard though

It’s doubles match.

Watching the Boisson/ Andreeva match . Coco can take her down, Lois looks exhausted

Sweaty and shirtless Jack Draper.

Mama Woon has published a kid’s book “Where’s Holger Rune?”

So where is he?

Who is she? Who was she? Who does she hope to be?

Dollface pic of France's 'Grand Quatre' celebrating Dicky G's career. Richard scrubs up nicely off court.

Mauresmo says women's matches can't be scheduled in the primetime night session because they don't last as long as the men's... yet women also aren't allowed to play best of 5 sets because of "scheduling issues". It's all very well having equal prizemoney but surely true equality would be making both men and women's tennis at grand slams best of 3 or best of 5 rather than giving women a lot less playing time and then saying they have to stick to the day slots because their matches are too short...

No one wants to see 5 sets of women's tennis with 30 breaks of serve and 90 unforced errors.

[quote]DL icon Taylor Townsend- TT

Taylor Townhouse

Lezlo Team

Big Sabs Team

She-Hulk looking formidable.

Lets go Sab¡!!!!!!!

Iga's titmatized by Sabs's huge hooters!

Come the fuck on Sab!!

Sablenka is blowing her lead!!!

It's getting cunty out there! I'll be hearing THE SCREAMING in my nightmares tonight

Wowwow. Omg

What a shot!!

[quote] Omg

Dyatlov right?

If they keep up this level, this will go down as one of the classics.

Yo Big Sab!!!

I don't get the love for Sabalenka on here. The screaming alone is obnoxious and ridiculous, plus her one-dimensional game is boring AF.

R271 Sabs is a messy party gal - I think many of us relate.

R271 She's good fun. Doesn't take herself too seriously but on her day, could beat anyone.

8 breaks of serve in a set, imagine 5 sets of this with McEnroe and Fouler commentating along with obvious insights from Mari Jo, "I think whoever can hold serve will win the set and since A is the higher ranked player she should probably win if she can serve well and take advantage of her chances on B's second serve. She also needs to keep the ball inside the lines which has been a problem for her lately so she needs to stop that if she's going to win this thing"

'Eager Iga' is back with a bang.

Yes Big Sab! Lets Goooooo!!!

YAY!

IGA OUT!!!

Shame the third set was a blow out. That was shaping up to be an epic.

Still... bring on La Boisson!

Grip it! And Rip it!

Coco v. Lois: who are we cheering for?

Side to sode Coco. Make her move! You're a better player than her

Lets Go COCO!!!

Gauff should be penalized for that hideous outfit

Boisson no bueno

LET'S GO COCOPUFFS!!!!!

THE MIRACULOUS LOĪS COMEBACK STARTS HERE!

[quote] YAY!

I’m so happy.

Okay. So CocoGOAT v She-Hulk.

Who wins?

I really have no idea. My brain says She-Hulk, but my heart says CocoGOAT. (I like both equally, btw.)

I'd say SHE-HULK r289

Shehulk

Boisson looked exhausted right from the first game.

Coco Team

All my faves won today. Im so happy

Icing on the cake is that Iga got BAGELED!

Iga is blaming umpire for her loss. Lolz

[quote] Im so happy

Yay!

I wish I didn’t love Iga going out with a bagel but I just do. Vamos She-Hulk!

Team Sabs all the way

She-hulk has been diligent in fixing her head game and adding shot variety to her playiing style—whomever said that she just hits and grounts knows little about tennis…she has made many improvements in just the past four years.

Grunts*

R271. Yes. Can’t get passed the screaming. Can hardly watch her play. When I do hate watch, though, I agree with you R300. Yes, she’s improved, but I still can’t stand her game. Sad to say, she’ll probably beat Gauff.

She doesn't grunt. She fucking screams.

You scream, we scream, they all scream.

For what? In her case 3 million €. In your case, a candy bar.

[quote] In your case, a candy bar.

Or ice cream.

Or sour grapes.

Luvly Lore Team or Carlitos Team?

Novaxx Team or Il Gingio Team?

Team Alcaraz!

Team il Syringio!

Carlitos team.

Il Gingio team.

I favor whomever can defeat Novaxx.

Thanks for asking!

Agassi mumbles. Wish he could enunciate.

His Royal Loveliness, Lore, steals the first set!

Something I’ve wondered about.

It was recent that Roland Garros added those sayings to Philippe Chatrier, like “Victory belongs to the most tenacious.”

Anyone else surprised it’s in English?

R312 - it's written in French on the opposite side of the court

R313 is saying “bless your heart” to R312.

Very sweetly…

Why would I feel stupid? It’s a legit question, and how would I know what it says in French?

Being mean for the sake of being mean isn’t the win you think it is.

[quote] Being mean for the sake of being mean isn’t the win you think it is.

Welcome to Datalounge.

R315 …que Dieu la bénisse

R315 Legit questions could be answered by a 5 second google.

You're an idiot.

Meanwhile—Carlitos is kicking ass right now

[quote] Meanwhile—Carlitos is kicking ass right now

Yay! I’m so happy.

Sad way for the match to end. It was great for 2 sets.

What’s the reason for Lore’s walkover?

Injury.

Thank you, R323.

Prego.

[quote] Prego.

Musetti is having a baby?

He pulled his hanmstring

Handspring. FIFY

Voodoo doll and pins at the ready...

Let's go Sinner!!!!!!!

Sinner is gross looking , 23 looks 40. He probably smells weird too

OK, Harriet, calm down!

Bring me some deodorant and....CREATINA!

Novax needs his, sniff, bathroom break soon.

Why is the crowd behind Novax?

Great shot from Sinner!

Come on, Jannick, you're too sloppy thus far. You need to crush him.

Make Novaxx realise that as long as you and Carlitos are in a draw he will ZERO chances to win, and he'd be better off saving face and retiring.

He’s a huge champion scrapping for another taste of a title. People have huge respect for that.

And he doesn’t have many more chances.

Plus, Sinner is boring,

Novaxx shots lack mRNA today.

Should still be a straight-set loss, but breaking Sinner just as he’s about to win the second set is classic, sadistic Djokovic.

Yay! Il Gingio so far.

Oh look, Novax pre-emptively displaying an excuse in the event he should lose the match.

Novaxx is now hopped up on Ivermectin for the third set!

"Why is the crowd behind Novax?"

Because he's a legend, the GOAT, and they want to see more tennis. He has (or has had) a contentious relationships with a lot of crowds, but at this point, there's an established respect for him.

I should like Sinner by now. I've seen a couple interviews and he's an interesting interview and well spoken. But I still find it hard to root for him; though I'm rooting for him over Novak.

[quote]Because he's a legend, the GOAT

To each their own...

[quote] the GOAT

I am GOAT.

R345 too German…not enough Italian in him.

I would like a 5-setter if Novaxx wins because I want him too tired to play Carlos. However, Sinner is working him in 3 sets like it's 5. As long as Novaxx is tired at the end, I'm good. I really don't want to see Novaxx on Sunday.

[quote] at this point, there's an established respect for him.

Oh my sides!!!

Right, Jannick, 7th game - PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN.

...or not!

Novaxx totally pretending an injury.....just wanted his nuts felt up.

Sometimes you feel like a nut….

Um... anyone else feeling Novak's coach? Woof!

Womp womp.

Numbers 1 and 2 play each in the finals of RG for both men and women!

Bye, Novaxx! Unfortuately, you found someone who didn't fall for you "I'm injured but will soldier on" trick.

Novaxx humbled. Touching the court in his way out. Might well be the last time we seen at Roland Garros.

— we see him

I hope that’s the case, R358. I’m so happy he’s gone. Yay!

The joker is out!

Bye, “Nole”!

Not rooting for a cheater

It’s Alcaraz all the way!!!!

We need a worthy successor to Rafa.

Woohoo, the wicked witch is dead 🥳🥳

Il Gingio/Novaxx was a very entertaining match. Novaxx played VERY well, red-lining his game and his defense was exceptional.

Sinner is just younger and better, and he came through when it mattered.

Ciao, Lore

....

Wonderful! Goodbye!

A Novax loss tastes so sweet. Plus the bitter tears of Novax supporters tastes like candy.

She-Hulk v. Coco: who wins, DL?

She-Hulk team.

Team Sabs!

So now that Novax has fessed up to being down in the dumps about his tennis future, what will the Australian Open do to honor his career 10 wins at that tournament? Has any one else ever won the Australian Open 10 times? He might make it even 11 times. After all, Rafa did get a statue at Roland Garros and a grave stone on Chatrier. What will befit Novax, and where? Would Wimbledon even consider coming down from on high? Doubtful.

Good question R373. I hate Novaxx, but he does deserve a statue at the Aussie. He's 10-0 in finals there. Not Rafa, of course. But still damn incredible.

Wimbledon would never give out statues, I assume. And since there isn't one ultra dominant player there(Fed has 8, Pete and Novak 7, Borg 5) I think it makes that decision easier for Wimby to make.

Don't look at us! We don't much like outsiders!

So basically, an honorarium can't be at Roland Garros, it can't be at Wimbledon, it can't be the at the U.S. Open, and despite the Aus Open being his most celebrated, they did deport him once.

The Happy Slam can display a large bronze or copper version of his fake Covid certificate and Australian deportation order inside a replica of his unsuitable and prison-like quarantine hotel room.

Settled then, the China Open it will be. An oversized golden statue of Novak holding a smashed racket, looking eastward toward the rising sun.

[quote] oh the humiliation; a Masters 500!

Double the honor!

R373 A statue to Novaxx at the Melbourne Immigration Detention Centre?

Apologies, R377, I didn't see your post - similar thinking.

Let's go She-Hulk!!

Who's watching? Predictions?

Sabs in 3 - first two sets will be close, Sabs will break Coco twice in the third, and take it 6-2 or 6-3.

I’m hoping for Coco in 3.

Great. Venus interviewing Sarah Jessica Parker.

Nothing says grand slam tennis like that.

Lol, R386, that's what I was saying. It's such random non-match content. It wasn't terrible, but it seems like something for pre-Red Carpet coverage for an awards show.

But which tennis fan says, gee, this is really interesting; I need to check out SJP’s bad show!

No, they are all annoyed with the intrusion.

Is Lindsay MAGA?

I always liked her, but I find her commentary underwhelming.

R389, Lindsay is from Orange County as is her husband - and they lived there for a long time before moving to Orlando area due to a USTA tennis job. And she's wealthy. None of this means she's MAGA. But I can see her as a "look the other way until Trump is gone" Republican; so essentially a MAGA enabler.

[quote] Venus interviewing Sarah Jessica Parker

Venus was also at a Paris photocall for season 3 of the show

Should be be preparing for Venus to be on AJLT - giving private lessons to Charlotte and LTW's kids after the College Whisperer tells them that they need unique experiences and the parents go overboard.

r390I knew they were from Orange County, but I didn't realize they had relocated.

She strikes me as a country club Republican.

r390 ^^^

Team Sabs!!

R393, I'd assume they still have a home in Southern California. I was surprised when it was mentioned during some coverage earlier this year or last year that her family moved to Orlando. Lindsay always said how much she loved SoCal. But, again, if they have multiple homes, and she travels for commentating, and they have money, so it's not like they're trapped in central Florida all the time.

SHE-HULK up an early break

If Sabs wins the first set, I think she wins the second set.

Coco in trouble!!

R398 If she wins the first set, then she's one set closer to victory.

LOL r400

COCO CLAPS BACK!

MOMENTUM SHIFT!!!

What a shot!!!!

I worry for the citizens of Paris if She Hulk loses this match.

The crowd seems partial to Cocomania!

I think Sabs inner hulk has been unleashed

Sabs' emotion makes her endearing to me

SHANKALENKA!

This is turning in quite the match

An actual smile from Coco’s mom!

Sablenka is a beast!!

She Hulk on the rampage!

That set was exhausting.

Coco needs to refocus and win this set if she wants to stay in the match.

Turning!

I wish Chris Evert would post more often

[quote] Turning!

The lady's not for turning!

She'll also want to hit more first serves to try and win more points

R419 Agree Mary Joe, getting that first serve in is crucial to starting the point.

If Coco wins the second set, this match will go to a third.

Chris Evert, World's Worst Tennis Commentator

I just hope we live long enough to see one of these girls hold twice in row

As usual, you're correct, Big Bro. I have nothing to add to your observation.

Both these young ladies seem to be of the belief that the objective of the game is to hit the ball into the net.

R425 The net has always posed a problem. I tell young players that the most effective strategy is to try and hit over it.

Whoever wins this third set will win the match.

Can anyone smell fish?

ARYNA'S MAD AS HELL AND SHE'S NOT GOING TO TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Let’s go, Coco!

This match is the opposite of my1984 Wimbledon final against Conners when I only hit 4 errors in the entire match.

SA-BOT-LENKA IS IMPLODING!

Redpill me on this hulk known as "She".

Serving for the match...

You are NOW correct, r434, though you weren't THEN.

DUH-RAMA!

COCO LOCO!!!!!

I voted She-Hulk team, but I'm not disappointed that CoCo won.

Now I'd like to thank my god...

Coco fucking EARNED that. Gutsy from start to finish.

Go Coco!

R435 Call me 'Mystic Meg'

Well that match was messy as fuck.

The player who won two sets won the match.

It's always cute when Coco's anxious dad emerges from hiding to celebrate.

So you see kids, you only need to get to the court on time and one of you will win eventually!

You’ve got to feel for Sabalenka.

No, you don't.

Sabs's boyfriend is in for the pegging of his life tonight!

Cunty Justine's ageing well! Very chic.

She looks really different.

I think She Hulk will rebound at Wimbledon.

I always liked Justine

[quote] I always liked Justine

You have a Hardenne for her.

COCOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Never liked Justine Henin Hardene

Such a long trophy ceremony longer apparently than even the Aussie and U.S. Opens.

I was always neutral about Justine Henin-Hardenne

Justine's first retirement was actually a silent doping ban.

OK, OK wrap it up now, Coco.

Great audio on Coco's speech TNT!

Next up is Wimbledon where Coco and Aryna will be among the players competing for the title.

Wow Justine really scrubs up well these days.

I will say this for Coco: Being a two time slam winner is one better than being a one time slam winner.

Chris Evert just said the following on TNT during a conversation ABOUT Coco Gauff:

[quote] Commentator: What do we see in the future for this 21-year old American?

[quote] Chrissie: Coco Gauff?

[quote] Commentator: Yeah.

[quote] Chrissie: Her future?

Did the cancer spread to Chrissie's brain?

I love the Chris Evert troll(s)

It's doubles match.

With doubles you have two opponents to worry about, not just one!

Very happy for Coco!

If Sabs didn't like stealth Euro dick so much she'd be a lesbian like Martina who I played so many times over the years.

Tomorrow will it be white or brown on top?

Sabs confirms at the post match press conference she's jetting off to Mykonos tonight for a tequila-and-Eurodickfest to recuperate. Honorary Datalounger.

Let's hope she posts some inappropriate pictures on Instagram. The WTA needs a little sexing up.

[quote]The WTA needs a little sexing up

Sexpot Pam agrees

Congratulations Coco Gauff. I'm elated for her win!! Overjoyed as if I were Candy herself

Coco No Choko (finally)

Is this where we talk about BOSS Open?

I always thought that Carlos was more than just Justine's coach and when she married they looked like a thruple

Big Sab is my girl but its trally unsportsmanlike the way she is conducting herself in post match interviews- saying Coco didnt play well or that it she (Sab)who made many unforced errors or blaming weather etc etc. Its exhausting Sab, shut up

Brownies won the men’s doubles!

R478 Yep, a few journalists kept trying to invite her to say something positive about Coco and Sabs just refused to give her any proper credit. Very cunty.

She also said - unprompted - that if Iga had beaten her (Aryna) in the semi she would've gone on to beat Coco... which seemed like going out of her way to belittle Coco's win. Not at all impressed with her attitude.

R480 yes im very shocked

Nice to see Granollers and Zeballos finally get a title win - at their 4th attempt (as a pair), I think.

Big Sab needs to be stabbed in the heart for that shrieking, then again in the forehead for her sour grapes attitude!

Jesus, R473, Shiver got huge implants to go with her facelift?

The TNT male commentator should be fired. After the women’s final he talked like this was Davis Cup or pre-open tennis stating that the title was “returned to the United Sates.” No you blithering idiot, the title belongs to The winner, COCO GAUFF.

[quote] stating that the title was “returned to the United Sates.”

It's coming home.

It belongs to Trump now.

Im surprised at Sab's poat match comments. She is typically so gracious in defeat. I guess yoday sue showed her true colors. And to say had it been Iga who won the semifinals, that Coco wouldnt have won against Iga is rubbing salt in the wound

Yes Trump , Coco whomever, its USA US fucking A!

R469, isnt Sab's man a Brazilian? Where is she finding that Euro duck?

[quote] Where is she finding that Euro duck?

She's cottaging.

Boy, Pam Shriver sure aged into a not-attractive-older woman...

R491 Inevitable trajectory when you start out being a not-attractive young woman.

[quote]isnt Sab's man a Brazilian?

I think he was born in Brazil but his parents are from Greece

You have to remember…….ice is slippery.

Carlitos Team or Il Gingio Team?

Carlitos team.

Carlitos Team!

Because if wins he'll be off to Mykonos to join She-Hulk in a tequila-and-Eurodickfest romp.

R487, the only wound that Sabalenka salted was her own. Doubtful Coco GAF, but Aryna lost a lot of fans with those sour comments. From now on I'll be rooting for Sab to lose.

My favorite Twitter comment about Sab's attitude:

surprised sabalenka was able to even speak with such bitterness through her disgusting botched lip filler. you salty bitch, you were running around the court moaning like a feral hyena. that's YOUR fault. coco won bc she's better than you. btw i thought you were at least 35.

R487, Sabalenka is far from "always gracious." This hit a NEW LOW.

THE TRUTH: Sabalenka played like a dog for most, not all, of the second and third sets. Gauff hung tough and took advantage AS SHE SHOULD HAVE. This is a fucking professional sport. Man up and take your loss and credit your opponent, you bitch.

Meh. I still like She-Hulk.

Shady, Salty, Surly, Shit-Attitude She-Hulk

What's the difference between a season (e.g., clay and grass seasons) and a swing (e.g., Asian and South American swings). Is it purely that one is limited geographically?

r503 I'm sure Chris Evert will weigh in ...

Huh, R593? The SEASON is Jan - Dec.

I like Coco’s steely stare when she’s playing: “I don’t care if I’m not the best player, I’m the player who’s going to WIN.”

I've always thought she-hulk is a lez. Or at least bi. Are we sure she doesn't have a gf hidden somewhere? She reminds me a lot of Mauresmo.

R507 = Margaret Court

R499 lolz , love it.

R506, I second that. Coco always gives that look and then you can tell she will win the damn match

Lots of incisive commentary on this podcast in the aftermath of Coco-Stab....

If Sinner wins three sets today, he will be the Roland Garros champion.

I understand why they didn’t renew your commentary contract, Chris.

John McEnroe is high and/or drunk.

So who's going to win, DL?

Sinner or Alcaraz, r515

I'm going to stick my neck out here, and suggest it'll be player who wins.

I am in love with Carlos's lips

Can Carlos break early??

This is going to be a great match

Why is this thread so quiet?!!

Ugh, Zaslav. Vermin.

CARLOS BREAKS!

Sinner breaks back

WHERE IS EVERYONE???

I don't recall ever seeing Carlos get so cranky before.

Carlitos has no answers... for now.

Jayzuz but I'm in love with Carlos!

Carlitos is flailing. I’m Carlitos team, but much like yesterday (I was She-Hulk team) I wouldn’t mind if Il Gingio won.

I blame the outfit. How's a fella sposeta have any kind of confidence in that mess?.

I wanna see five sets, damn it!

You can still see Carlito's massive junk flopping even in black shorts, its that predominant

If Alcaraz wants to win the match, he's going to have to win more points.

I would like Sinner to win his first French Open. I do admire them both equally.

If Alcaraz returns to form, it will be a major comeback.

MOMENTUM SHIFT!!!

What a point!!!!!

The player who wins the tie break will win the second set.

Carlos is struggling to return Sinner's aces.

C'mon Carlos, let's make it a well deserved title, regardless of the winner!

[quote] regardless of the winner!

It's spelled "Sinner" with an "s".

Sinner won the second set. If he wins the next set, he'll win the tournament.

Je suis triste pour Monsieur Carlos Alcaraz

Chrissie is doing TNT UK coverage. Why didn't they put her on the TNT US coverage?

If this were the women's final, Sinner would already be the champion, but Carlos is a man so he needs to win another set. Is that how you see it, Mary Joe?

R544 The UK drew the short straw.

I see the PTB sat Navratilova next to Muster. They do not look very comfortable.

R547 Martina is often uncomfortable around men. That was one edge I had in our rivalry.

This is a Spike Lee joint.

I'm just glad it's these two in the final. I like them both, Sinner a bit more.

MOMENTUM SHIFT!

So damned sexy.

It's so important in tennis for your racquet to make contact with the ball and both men are doing that, although I think Carlos did it a bit better in that last set.

If Carlos wins the next two sets, he wins the match and the tournament.

part 185 here, as this is filling fast ....

Is Chris actually saying all of this, or are you just making fun of her super obvious observation commentary style?

R556 I wish I could take credit as they're all such interesting insights!

R556 Your cluelessness is almost adorable.

LOL

with Chrissie, nothing is too obvious ...

Marv?!?!

The LESBIANS were bad enough, is the WTA now to be overrun with the TRANS????

[quote] The LESBIANS were bad enough, is the WTA now to be overrun with the TRANS????

We've been here a long-time, Marg. You remember me don't you? (wink, wink)

It all could have gone Carlos' way if he had a better day!

Awesome Alcaraz!

There is a person with a large, prominent black cheek mole in Carlitos' box.

Is Sinner white or red?

Ethnically? He’s Austrian.

OH. MY. GOD.

Repent, sinner!

If Sinner goes on to lose this match, I think he'll have regrets about not winning that game.

[quote] Ethnically?

Skin color. Carlitos is brown. Is Sinner white or red?

HOLY SHIT. What a match

Yay, Carlitos! I hope to be hearing "the fifth and deciding set" soon, but still have doubt.

Can't believe Sinner blew three championship points.

Alcaraz will either win or lose this set.

Do we have a new thread yet?

Alcaraz really does play to make the crowd happy.

R575 someone set it up

Thanks r577

Use this new, work-safe and appropriate thread:

Although it's caused some controversy and may be nuked!

If either Alcaraz or Sinner wins the tie break, that person will win the match.

Oops. I meant "set". Silly me!

Are either of them clay specialist?

Back-to-back aces for Carlitos. Wow.

Now I'm starting to feel bad for Sinner

You shouldn't, r585. Win or lose, he's played amazing tennis.

I did not have Sinner choking on my Bingo Card.

He hasn't won a game since 5-3 0-40 up.

DAMN!!!!!!!!

To think Carlos came back from 0-40, championship point

I am enjoying this match.

The DJ playing Sweet Caroline at this precise moment seems a little... biased?

Whoever wins this fifth set will win the match.

The player who wins this fifth set is almost certainly going to win the tournament.

I want Sinner to win the 5th in a tiebreak. Sinner gets his first French Open, and Carlos, already a FO winner, can hold his head high regardless.

The Chrissie troll (and I am one of them) needs to take a breather.

Carlitos.

Il Gingio.

Il Syringo.

Wuud.

Woon.

New thread. Continue here.