Mary Lou Retton arrested for DUI

OP- I know I'm being a shallow faggot and or a bitchy queen but she should be arrested just for being SO unattractive.

Are we sure it wasn't Johnny Rapid?

Drunk and broke … that's no way to go through life, backflippin' bitch.

That Mary Lou Retton troll told you guys that she had a drinking problem 5 years ago, but none of you listened and drove him and all of his Mary Lou Retton updates off the board.

In that pic she looks more like Lou Retton.

[quote]In that pic she looks more like Lou Retton.

Mary!

That's a WV 9 or a NYC 3. If you lived in Fairmont WV you'd be drunk all the time, too.

Did she use the Go Fund Me money she "earned" to post bail?

Cane face!

It happens

MAGA trash.

And that's a picture with makeup ON.

Y’all mean girls!

Goddamn. Tough as old boots.

She looks both male and female.

What is she ethnically? She looks like she could be Italian.

On the bright side, her Depend underwear held up!

She looka like a man.

Before I read the title, I had thought: "Oh, look! The People of Walmart is back!"

[quote] What is she ethnically? She looks like she could be Italian.

An Irish Traveler.

She looks like that youngest kid on the Middle who has the Bird man disease.

She's in the National Italian American Sports Hall of Fame. It doesn't say anything more about her Italian-ness. Could be just one parent, I guess.

Pure white coal trash

She didn’t want no white man lookin at her tampax!

If she shart her Walmart Depends when she saw the red flashing lights in the rearview, R16 , at least it was a relatively easy cleanup job.

r1 We don't need to use the 'f word,' dear.

I agree with you, otherwise. My one FF was for that, not your overall statement.

MAGAT trash

She is starting to look like Geri Jewell's long lost cousin.

What a waste of FF r25

R27. But less funny. Did Harry Louis tell the cop that she wasn't drunk...

Drunk old whore!

R13, bitch! You could use a drink! And a surgery or the stick up your ass.

R24 - OMG, I am CRYING laughing!!!

Is she spending all that Go Fund Me money she raked in on booze instead of getting health insurance?

r28 Not at all - I rarely FF, actually. What do I care about giving up one.

R33, male hustlers.

I suspect her near death experience was opiate induced pneumonia. All addicts start to look the same

R34, may I use the FFs you don't? There are some genuinely hateful people here.

Trip to Betty Ford GoFundMe coming in hot!

Where's her daughter?

She ain't vaultin' perfect 10s no more!!!

[quote] Where's her daughter?

Doing what Mom taught her by example. Drowning her sorrows and planning the next grift.

EAT SHIT MARY LOU!!!!

Mary Lou BENDER

OMG that hair.

She isn't even trying.

Mary Low Rent, a new DL icon.

Who pissed in her Wheaties?

R45, Bart Conner.

Look! No belts or strings!

Republican values?

R48, most definitely.

Why is her face shaped like a loaf of bread?

Mattress Mack is a genuinely good guy. He donates a great deal to hurricane victims—he has opened up his showroom to people homeless from disasters. Donates a lot of $$. I haven’t lived in Houston for nearly 20 years, I’m disappointed if he donates to politicians like Ted Cruz.

[quote] Why is her face shaped like a loaf of bread?

Life-threatening yeast infection. Please send money.

R51 no he’s not. He is a huge homophobe. I know because one of my friends who haven’t spoken to in a long time was his longtime assistant and he quit because Mac became a huge homophobe. He does all the charity work he does as cover so he can do shitty things. He’s a very bad person. Very bad.

Mary Lou Retton?

Mary Lou Rotten!

The Faces of Meth

Midgets can't take too much.

She never had a very athletic appearance to me. Perhaps it was the height. Always looked like a den mother who made cookies.

Did they really have to hand-draw extra lines at the bottom of the height chart when she was being processed?

Born rough trash, will die rough trash.

Maga scum, what a delicious downfall...

Amateur.

Mary Crotch Rotten

MARY!

How much booze does it take for a midget to get blotto?

That's what she looks like -- an old meth-head.

And I should know; my neighborhood's full of 'em.

“Mary Lou Retton is not answering any questions”

i recall that interview of a catatonic retton on oxygen, shes maga so they danced around the covid vaccine subject

A boozer, a user, and a loser!

Who is this bitch? Is she one of Pete Hegeseths ex wives?

Share a moment with the world, Mary Lou!

R53, I’m sorry to hear that. I was naively hoping he might be a decent soul.

Ot Jerri Blank’s sister R27

WHYYYYYYYY

I was just going to say it looks like she and Tonya Harding have a lot they could bond over.

She be a crack ho now

I was molested by Lou Albano

Broadway doesn't go for booze and dope!

But apparently Marion County, West Virginia, does!

Booze today, heroin tomorrow!!!!!

Just say no, Mary Lou.

Looks like she left her choppers on the nightstand in OP’s pic.

Fake ass bitch is straight up criminal, I'd love to see her behind bars.

She made an incredible porno pegging Peter Dinklage.

so now the truth is coming out, it always does. She has health issues due to substance abuse.

R83, the bitch has every STI known to man!!!! That whore mouth has sucked every cock in Texas.

She knows where to find the booze and the depends

MAGA Lockup!

Thursdays this fall on the CW. Starring Mary Lou Retton as Butch Ann, a lesbian mother of three that lost her way with a heroin bust but loves her President Donald Trump!

I thought it was Rachel Dratch.

Diminutive dyke

Poor Gen Xers had to watch THIS on Saturday morning.

R89. She sounds sloshed...

Her skin isn't terrible for a 70-year-old.

She looks a right Karen.

Isn't there some saying about ending up with the face you deserve?

....

I think she should have a reality show. "Drunk on the Balance Beam" She was once America's sweetheart and an inspiration to all. The most tragic part is her becoming MAGA. At least you can fight addiction, but you can't fix retarded.

I wanna see the cop's bodycam footage and see Mary Lou try and walk the straight line like it's the balance beam.

She was maga before maga existed

She looks like this Jessy Kirson character.

Bless her heart!

She made a pivot from athlete to motivational speaker. This was a pre-social influence world but the grift is the same. Her client was the Republican National party and her appeal was the squeaky clean wholesome American aggression.

The pukes love to bootstrap and blame people who have lost their way.

Is she dying?

Amateur!

Debi Thomas: “Oksana, you weren’t a gymnast, chile!”

Oksana: “So VAT???! I VIN!”

Debi Thomas: “No, ho. I WIN.”

Oksana: “Right. You vin. But you are not gymnast. Ho.”

I just wanna know how grifting on gofundme and being arrested for DUI aligns with bootstraping.

Arreschted!

Way to tarnish your reputation, idiot.

[quote] Officers say they found Retton in her car in a nearby AutoZone parking lot with a screw-top bottle of wine in her passenger seat.

It's like a Reno:911 episode.

[quote] According to court documents we obtained, Mary Lou was initially stopped by cops after she had allegedly been driving her grey Porche "all over the roadway."

Wow. This bitch was begging for money because she didn't have medical insurance, but she drives a Porsche?

Her life is one big meth, um, mess.

Hagsville

Somewhere Ecaterina Szabo is doing the big, long, Jan Hooks as Bette Davis doing her video will laugh!

What SHE needs is a Mary Lou retcon.

She also need Mary Lou Retin A.

You don't destroy your body with gymnastics and live in West Virginia and not develop an opiate addiction

What a scammer!

Trump should make her Secretary of Defense.

R116, she'd at least have a healthy distrust of Russians...

What’s the bigger crime the dui or naming her daughter Shayla.

Who will play Mary Lou in the Lifetime movie?

Old: Linda Hunt

Young: Natalia Grace

Peter Dinklage in a short wig, R119.

I thought people of her political persuasion didn't believe in handouts. Shouldn't she take personal responsibility for her choices? Her choice to marry bad!y and blow her money. Her choice not to buy health insurance. Her choice not to vaccinate which led to Covid related pulmonary disease. Her choice to get shitfaced and drive around in her Porsche. Another spoiled athlete whose been blessed with talent, money, and adulation and is a pathetic ruin.

[quote] Old: Linda Hunt

[quote] Young: Natalia Grace

[quote] Peter Dinklage in a short wig

You bitches are eeeeevil!

R122, Dinklage is learning to do the splits as we speak. Oscar-bait.

[Quote]I think she should have a reality show. "Drunk on the Balance Beam"

more like drunk on Jim Beam

Like her sobriety her cuteness lasted about 5 minutes

Imagine being pulled over in West Virginia with an open bottle of Boone’s Farm in the console.

[quote] Her choice not to vaccinate which led to Covid related pulmonary disease.

She tested negative for Covid.

She owns a Porsche but was begging for money??? The grift is strong with these types.

I’m calling it now - she’ll be dead within the next five years.

In a fuckin porche r126

She's looking rode hard and put up wet in OP's photo. I haven't seen a fall from grace this bad since Amerca's Sweetheart Susan Richardson. Maybe Erin Moran.

R127 according to her. Do you believe it?

When did she get that Porsche? I know one of you can do this vital legwork of digging up when she got that car, and as always, stay safe and anonymous.

How long has she had that car? If it fits with the GoFundMe money, we may be able to share this to a wider audience.

She’s a typical maga grifter opioid addict.

….from West Virginia. Loves Boone’s Farm in the Porsche.

How do we know It was Boone's? The daily mail said it was a container with a screw-on top. It could have been Riunite.

I did the legwork, r133. I'm a car person so I was curious about what kind of Porsche she was driving.

She drives a red 2015 Porsche Panorama that she was able to keep after her marriage blew up in 2018.

*Porsche Panamera

R137 Another question is why can't a Christian woman hold on to a marriage ordained by Christ Almighty 🤔

Do you know who I am???

Maybe she was drinking Thunderbird.

{Quote] Guess her near-death experience a few years ago didn't make her a better person.

or a better driver OP

Some people can’t be helped.

I love it when a GoFunder drives a BMW or Porsche.....suckers.

Her pussy stinks!!!

Mary Lou Rotten

It was a bottle of Barefoot Merlot

She looks like an old streetwalker

[quote] What’s the bigger crime the dui or naming her daughter Shayla.

You stole my baby's name!!

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

I usually see older gay men driving that zaftig SUV/wagon/stretch sedan.

The cars usually have crumpled fenders and the guys are looking for meth and/or dumb 20 year-olds that have meth.

The crazy straw across her face attaches to a beer helmet.

West Virginia, goofy Porsche and screw top wine make this story so good. I wonder if it was a strawberry wine from one of WV’s famous wineries? Shop local!

riunite! 😂

God, she was so annoying when she was young, recalling her battery ads (It's SUPER-charged!!!).

I suppose I should feel pity for her, here's the thing, Retton had opportunities in life most people don't have, apparently, she squandered them.

[quote] She looks like an old streetwalker

I prefer Ms. Putain, but merci.

Turning tricks behind a Walmart dumpster in shithole West Virginia. Does she get paid in box wine?

A entire box of wine for that???

I think it's more like, one of those little single serving mini bottles.

She'd probably have to pull a Dawson-like weekend for a box of wine.

Has it been explained what she was doing in West Virginia? The town where she was arrested was where she grew up.

But it seems like she was last living in Houston.

[quote] She'd probably have to pull a Dawson-like weekend for a box of wine.

I'll do it! (As soon as my bail is posted)

I have to wonder if all of that pounding her body and joints took is now coming back to haunt her.

She could have become addicted to pain pills cuz - well, she was in pain a lot. Same with alcohol.

Just trying to give the woman some grace here. Prince and Madonna got hooked on the pain pills because of their dancing in heels for 20+ years. And they weren't pounding their feet and knees 6 hours a day like she was.

Plus the constant stress on bones at a young age causes growth plate issues which affect joints later in life.

Gymnasts can have a whole lot of problems later on - it's never talked about. Particularly those who were training under Karolyi and when we didn't know as much about the impact of all of this.

My younger sister says the same about ballet r161.

Gymnastics is murder on the body. I know a couple women who trashed their bodies and never competed beyond high school

R162 - yes, ballet too. Most dancers are in trouble by their 40s.

Ballet and gymnastics have the additional factor of borderline anorexia, so their bones are more fragile in the first place.

Look at football players/lineman - lifetimes of injuries and pain is more common than not.

I've only had back pain a few sporadic times in my life. I can't imagine what life is like when you're in pain just walking to the bathroom.

no grace extended to bootstrappers.

And who knows what kind of shit she had to take from Bela Karolyi and his wife as a kid. People running the US gymnastics program were rather toxic.

"Hi Mom - how's everything going - you good propped up in bed? Anything on TV? No? Anything you want to watch?"

"I'd. Like. To. Watch....." tension builds in the room, her daughters all eyeing each other...."the 1984 Olympics Gymnastics"

"AAAAAAGHHHH!!!! MAAWWWWMMMM!!!! NOOO!!" all daughters shriek, then suddenly interrupted by the sound of an empty 2L bottle of Paul Mason chablis wine bottle crashing to the floor.

I never trusted her because of baby teeth. If it wasn’t for Fred Dwyers ball's and ass, 1984 would have completely sucked.

She’s been back in West Virginia for while.

You gotta let a ho be a ho

R169 We can tell

She peaked at age 16. That's gotta be rough.

[quote] Gymnasts can have a whole lot of problems later on - it's never talked about. Particularly those who were training under Karolyi and when we didn't know as much about the impact of all of this.

And yet most of them don't get caught drunk driving or scamming hundreds of thousands of dollars for medical bills. Not to mention her horrible takes when it comes to things like the Nassar case. She is uniquely cunty in the world of US gymnasts.

She always came across as a sanctimonious cunt. And MAGA as well, so fuck her.

Zola Budd tripped Mary Decker and both managed to slip into respectable obscurity.

Aging is a fucking nightmare

Talk to my lawyer!

You all love me! You really love me.

To be specific, R155, Retton claimed those batteries were 'sah-OOOOOO-pah charged!" This ad drove me crazy in the 80s.

R179, just for you!

Her transformation into Patton Oswalt is proceeding apace

Sad substance cautionary life. For all the trashing on this thread you can be sure she is a very unhappy woman (if you’ve been close to substance abuse you’ll know this). What is the evidence she is MAGA? Speculation?

R182 She's definitely was a Republican and was a big Reagan supporter, but I see nothing online to suggest she is a Trump supporter or MAGA affiliated. I know many Republicans that draw the line at Trump.

She's an anti-vaxxer. Not hard to do the math on this one.

R184, an antivaxxer who moved back to West Virginia. Maybe Texas wasn't sufficiently Republican for her?

If you call yourself a Republican these days, you're MAGA.

On the positive side, Mary Lou can now go on tour with Tonya Harding and rake in hundreds on the Florida Bar Jell-O Wrestling Circuit.

Not to argue whether or not MLR is an anti-vaxxer, but your link R184 hardly serves as undeniable truth. Just because some guy on the internet says something doesn't mean it's true.

I kinda saw her on one of those entertainment shows and they went back to her grift - the one when she "needed" pure oxygen. Pretty sure she's an anti-vaxxer. MAGAT for sure.

She didn't stick the 1984 vault.

I loved her at the time, but she's trash.

R190 Nadia didn’t stick at least one of her landings she received a 10 for. MLR earned that gold. But she’s a trash human. Scum.

R132 = Nelli Kim!!

Is she a hillbilly or a faux one like Jaydine?

Daily Fail now has a huge headline saying her family has "issued a deeply worrying update".

According to the family, she has "vanished".

Another grift afoot. Just wait...

Has her daughter started another Go Fund Me grift to "find" her mother? Mary Lou is probably hiding in the attic until the GFM hits 100k then she will magically reappear, disheveled and acting disoriented.

I graduated high school @ 15,& graduated from CUNY @19.I started working for one of the national morning news shows soon after graduation.

One of my first big assignments was to pick up Mary Lou Retton at the St Moritz,which is where we put our guests at the time. But we usually just had the limo & the limo driver get the guests to the studio.

There was some need that the grown ups weren’t sharing with me, a star struck green kid from upstate NY,about exactly why MLR [b] had[/b] to be picked up personally- but I was told to go do it, and I did. Happily.

I learned my first lesson about celebrity that morning. Mary Lou was such a bitch. And very nasty. And bratty.

And she looked like a thumb.

[quote] An inside source said in the wake of her arrest: 'Her family had no idea she was here at all, they found out about the arrest when everyone else did.

[quote] 'They don't really talk much, she moved away. She never called them to tell them that she was coming back, they only found out after the arrest. That's families for you, it's not her best decision. Families are like that, there wasn't a falling out – they just haven't spoken in a while'.

[quote] Now it appears Retton has gone completely to ground, with no sign of her at her family home in Fairmont or her primary residence, her post-divorce property in Texas.

[quote] According to social media, Retton and her four daughters have a very close relationship, though she has not appeared in her children's Instagram posts in at least six months.

Missing: 4'9 middle-aged midget with no neck.

R201 The cat’s face says it all.

You left a lot out of that story, R199.

What year was it? Was it during her gymnast days or after? And if so, how much after?

What did she specifically do to warrant her bitchiness?

DL minds want to know.

Sounds like Mary Lou may have pulled a Sinead.

What is needed is a Go Fund Me for that damn cat.

Now I feel like watching THAT DARN CAT

MLR in r201's photo looks like an old peasant woman. Those girls don't stand a genetic chance.

"We're really close to our mom, but we haven't heard from her for six months and we don't know where the hell she is. But she's a great mom and cares about us deeply. She's super charged."

On a bender and MIA is a huge, glaring sign that she is off the rails. 500 grand will pay for an expensive detox facility. I read ozempic is being used to treat drunks with success.

MLR has options but I knew she was a toxin when she made a pivot into motivational speaking and her performance was preachy and stern.

Advertising is so strange. Would you purchase batteries because you heard a midget scream the battery is super-duper charged?

Crackhead 80s.

Did Cathy Rigby have any scandals?

R211 Just wearing a Stayfree maxi-pad on the uneven bars.

Cathy Rigby was legitimately cute and became an attractive woman. She did commentary for years until the late 1980s when she stopped, in part she said because she didn't like the eating disorder culture within the sport, herself a recovering bulimic. She took voice and acting lessons and rode her portrayal of Peter Pan into the ground she did it so often. I think she got a Tony nod for it at one point. Don't know if she's ever had any success doing any other show.

The woman is spiraling! First a divorce, then an ICU visit, and now a DUI. Oh, and she lives in a West Virginia trailer. The poor dear.

Rigby also did orange juice commercials and an episode of The Six Million Dollar Man where she played a Russian gymnast.

R215 Cathy Rigby playing a gymnast?!

No way!

Can you guys please hurry up and tell all your Mary Lou retten jokes I am so sick of seeing this half melted head of a Lego person bumped to the top of the feed

Her lawyer, from an esteemed candy family, says Ms. Retton is fine. She’s currently curled up in the shower with a Yeti cup full of rum and Riunite.

She's on skid row but drives a Porsche? Is this like when Sue Ellen Ewing hit rock bottom in the drunk tank?

[quote] in fact, the lawyer is adamant she's currently "in good spirits."

I believe it. Rum, whiskey, vodka, brandy, gin...

There's been reported sightings of a midget driving around Appalachia with an open can of Olde English 800.

Here's Ed Rollo, a Morgantown WV lawyer with his daughter, newly graduated from WV Law in 2020. This is WV prestige, people.

^sorry

Trust me, he's a troll.

"Rigby also did orange juice commercials and an episode of The Six Million Dollar Man where she played a Russian gymnast."

But was she in the phenomenal gymnastics-kung fu mashup Gymkata?

Eat shit Cathy Rigby! I was the star of Ice Castles and was a Bond girl! Not to mention working with Miss Bette Davis.

The locals post signs -

“BEWARE: STITCH IS BACK IN TOWN” - with a picture of Stitch in a leotard on the beam.

It’s kind of like those “Beware of aggressive Canadian Geese” signs.

[r-203] I am writing this with alternating index finger as i’m getting orange with yellow chrome put on my nails. it looks better better than it sounds.

But thanks for asking!

1) Mary Lou was fresh off her Olympic wins.. This was her first national,or national morning interview , after her 1986 victories.

She appeared to be a bundle of delightful, happy energy who had a million watt smile.

She emerged from her suite rumpled, bloated and angry. She ignored my “Good morning, Ms Retton, Can I get you anything……?”, breezed by me, , and swanned into the limo.

I made one more attempt to ask her if she needed anything. Mary Lou told me to “Shut up.”.

And when The Thumb talks (at least at that moment in 1986), you listen.

So I shut up, and locked that away for use later on.

That and Liza with a M doing coke on the toilet seat upstairs from the studio, only to go downstairs to the studio for her segment to discuss how much she enjoyed living drug free.

R227 The shut up response reminds me of when I visited a friend's mother in the nursing home. My friend would cheerily greet the mom's roommate with a chirpy "GOOD MORNING EVELYN!" and the reply back would always be "AHH, SHADDUP!" This was 20+ years ago and we still laugh our heads off over it.

R227 Wow. What a cunting little cunt.

Now you need to tell us more about Liza and other adventures you had.

Yes, what r29 said. Please.

quite the visual r221 😂

The visual includes a fucking PORSCHE!

And Mary Lou now topless.

R199/R227, you said that you graduated high school at 15 and college at 19 and this was your first big job. You remember the years you graduated? Then surely you'd know that MLR's victory was in the 1984 Olympics, not 1986. She was already something of a has been in 86.

r217 You bumped the thread, moron.

Has she released a statement yet?

[quote] Has she released a statement yet?

Yes. MY PUSSY STINKS!!!