Constipated flier taking too long in bathroom becomes victim of enraged pilot

What kind of trash goes on a plane and sits on the fucking toilet for 20+ minutes stinking up the plane. Disgusting. Do it at the airport or don't fly. No sympathy.

Nasty man. Get your shit together. You cannot expect to monopolize a bathroom for that long in the air. Let this be a lesson.

No one wanted to see your little pecker and balls anyway. Calm down, sir.

20 minutes?! Nope.

And I try not to be bigoted but the Haredim seriously test it. So many personal stories from back when I served the public. (Secular Jews are awesome, but the Orthodox can be horrible people all too often)

You tell ‘em, DL! Drag those constipated travelers out of bathrooms with their pants around their ankles while deriding their religion!

I once had a bad case of the runs on a flight from Beijing to Toronto.

If there is one place you do NOT want a case of the runs, it is on an international flight.

Imagine the stench that the other passengers had to deal with! The oxygen masks probably dropped down so everyone could breathe again.

Christ you bitchy queens are mean ba$tards.

We should never have sold this jackass a ticket. Some flyers are more trouble than they're worth. See you in court, butt hole!!

Constipations means there was no stench, i would think, and though 20 minutes is indeed annoying the reaction was disproportionate.

Hogging a bathroom toilet for 20 minutes because of constipation is crazy. I mean if anything if there is one moment where constipation is a good thing, its on a flight. Who wants to voluntarily shit in a airplane toilet? It really should only be for emergencies only.

Obviously if all this is true the pilot is a certified nut case, though. We'll see if he has a good case, if true he should have plenty of witnesses.

*Hogging an airplane toilet

Now let's expose them for the welfare queens they are!

Sex and drug-fulled party town Tulum seems to be an unlikely vacationing spot for an Orthodox Jew.

Remember the Orthodox Jews who were asked to leave the plane for being stinky?

This is so weird.

Tulum to Houston is 2 hours and 40 minutes from gate to gate. You’re in the air for 2 hours.

It must have seemed like 2 days for the other passengers R16. 2 days of stink.

What stink??? The guy was CONSTIPATED.

I don't believe this at all. He's lying about the encounter. Maybe they were trying to land?

Removing someone from the bathroom by their ankles means there was something else going on. And then throw in the anti-semitic remarks is mwa, chef's kiss.

And if you're constiipated - nothing's coming out anyway, so go back to your seat after 20 minutes.

He did something else and planted this story ahead of it so that nobody can comment about the incident because it's now a legal matter.

I have zero sympathy for this religious creep. I worked as a wilderness guide and on an "Orthodox trip". On this particular trip they insisted only their freaky order of nutter would be present and insisted on certain foods etc. After all this special treatment these weird guys refused to shit in the toilet and shit on the ground next to it. It was too unclean for them they said. These oddballs need to get trained to be in public or they need to stay in the synagogue or wherever they train them to be so special. Personally I will never work with them again. My friend who was in the ADF told me the Orthodox have their own fighting units because they are impossible to work with even for the regular Jewish forces. They have toilet issues apparently.

I can see an interest in Chichén Itzá, as other tourists have, but the Orthodox aren't known for such curiosity, are they?

And why would (Ultra?) Orthodox Jews with dietary, hygiene, and toilet issues travel to a country known for Montezuma's revenge? Makes no sense. Unless they're drug mules and there was an in-flight issue.

“Orthodox Jew” was all I needed to read. Team pilot.

Too much brisket.

He was trying to swallow down something he wanted to hide from customs. Gem stones, I'm imagining.

And not all Orthodox Jews are bad - it's 50/50. There's a large array in orthodoxy with some being more liberal.

It really depends on whether they've ever gone to school or interacted with anyone outside of their community.

If they've only gone to Yeshiva and religious schools and stayed in their own community - yeah, they're awful.

Beware of Haredi flyers, it can get strange. I was once seated next to a rabbi on the LAX-JFK red eye (which is often busy with Orthodox jewelers and friends traveling back and forth), and one of his followers stood in the aisle, over me, and just stared—as if he expected me to move to another seat. I just stared back and asked if he needed help, or if not move to let the line behind him move on.

I believe the homeland security agent tightened his handcuffs to punish him for not being being completely submissive. Power-tripping scumbag.

I will need to see the genitalia before I decide whose side I'm on.

A constipated man neither fouls the air around him outside the restroom, nor needs 20 minutes to announce all he's experienced is bitter disappointment.

Lazy anti-Semitic bullshit.

If you are constipated you don't sit on the shitter for 20 mins.

With all the fuckery people get up to I am not surprised 20 mins in an airplane can would arouse suspicion.

What R19 said. Without a doubt.

If you're constipated, there's no reason to keep sitting on the toilet. They probably suspected something else was going on...drug trafficking??

That being said, United is a total garbage airline. It rivals Spirit.

[quote] He was trying to swallow down something he wanted to hide from customs. Gem stones, I'm imagining.

This right here.

[quote] And not all Orthodox Jews are bad - it's 50/50. There's a large array in orthodoxy with some being more liberal. It really depends on whether they've ever gone to school or interacted with anyone outside of their community. If they've only gone to Yeshiva and religious schools and stayed in their own community - yeah, they're awful.

The Haredi are deeply bizarre and they don’t practise your standard liberal/culturally Jewish version of Judaism most DLers are familiar with. In practical, everyday terms it has more in common with fundamentalist Islam and Christian cults.

A friend lives in a Melbourne suburb bordering very stringent orthodox communities. The husbands sit around reading the Torah all day so the wives have to make the money. But the religious schools a lot of the women attended do not offer school certificates so the only work they can get are back in these same schools.

No sympathy. The aircraft is not the place to arrange for a leisurely dump. Quick, emergency release only.

On a NY to Heathrow flight I was stretched legs down the back of the cabin when I noticed an increase in Haredis. One told me to leave so they could pray, I told him to fuck off, I'd leave when I was ready. Waited another 10 minutes before I left. On the other hand, on my first trip to Israel, a Brooklyn born Haredi woman and her husband were chatting to me in the aisle. Dad was jewish and when I told them that, they welcomed me to Israel and made an announcement to the other passengers that it t was my first trip to Israel and began clapping. Gotta take people as you find them.

I just assume that anyone who spends 20 minutes in a tiny airplane bathroom really needs to be in there. Either way constipated or he had some other digestive issues. No one hangs out in there for fun. I hate using a plane bathroom to piss and that takes two minutes.

I don't like extreme religious people. (Weirdos)

For all they know he could have been assembling a bomb in there. You have to communicate in shared spaces or people become concerned. It's not your home bathroom.

NO HE DIDN'T!

When has anyone ever gone to the bathroom to assemble a bomb, r39? The shoe bomber boarded the plane with the bomb already in his shoe and the 2009 underwear bomber was also ready to go. That sounds like some 2002 paranoid thinking on your part.

I think DLers hate extremely religious people and are twisting themselves into knots to vilify this guy

R41 - no - this story doesn't pass the sniff test. Flight attendants and pilots are professional, and they certainly aren't going to throw around slurs on top of pulling someone out of the toilet.

If you're constiipated - you don't go to the toilet for 20 minutes.

And yes - we don't like extremely religious people of any stripe because they're not to be trusted, usually hate gays, and believe in superstition over reason.

They should figure out a way to build two bathrooms. Not rocket science.

[quote]r36 On a NY to Heathrow flight I was stretched legs down the back of the cabin

You were what now?

I've only been on a plane once in my life. I was 12 and don't remember it really well. It was a piedmont flight in 1976. I didn't know shit about anything. I really thought this guy would get sympathy, but then I remembered how cramped it was. LMFO, you all are MEAN! But, omg, I'm cracking up.

Bet the pig was on ozempic and can't poop. One of the side effects

Can't he sue the fuck out of them? I mean, I know he's filed a Federal lawsuit. It seems like they just can't humiliate someone like that and get away with it. What an embarrassing, humiliation. Jesus, the pilot went overboard.

[Quote] Gem stones, I'm imagining.

Were they … FABULOUS????

There's an X-Files episode about a Jewish man who was murdered but comes back and gets revenge. His wife brought him back through writing on his hand and prayers from the Sefer Yetzirah ( sorry spelling), is that an Orthodox Jew? Has anyone seen that? I thought of that, but not trying to be offensive.

[quote] and making scathing remarks about their Judaism, and how ‘Jews act’,”

Doesn't sound like professional behavior to me.

Unless there are witnesses saying it happened the way it did — and usually we see that, we hear others talking about it on social media — this is a shakedown attempt by Constipated-Or-Masturbating Yisroel Liebb and his sidekick. They want United to “settle.” $$$$$$

Also in the lawsuit it says he was occupying the plane lavatory for 20 minutes, then the flight attendant asked his fellow Haredi passenger to knock and check on him, then it was 10 more minutes when the pilot allegedly flipped out and ripped the lavatory door down. So 30+ minutes in there.

I figured there's much more to this story that we currently know now R51. It all sounds very exaggerated.

A constipated toilet hogger can still produce volumes of stinky flatulence.

Another sketchy lawsuit by yet another Orthodox Jew in the air.

One of them sued because he had to sit next to a woman.

One of them sued because a delayed flight meant he was in the air an hour into the Sabbath.

One of them sued because his inflight meal wasn't Kosher - He produced no evidence, just vague accusations of HITLER IN A BOWL!

It's always a lawsuit. It's always "antisemitism." It's always a media frenzy. You know what they say about ugly stereotypes having a grain of truth to them.

And they never win those cases. So they are throwing their money away.

I’m beyond skeptical. If a pilot came roaring out of the cockpit mid-flight and broke open the toilet door and yanked someone right out of the toilet, it would be a shocking and alarming thing to witness. What are the odds that NOBODY on the flight took out their cell phone or reported it on social media?

R54…. yep.

Perhaps the plane was on the ground and couldn't take off because the man was in the bathroom.

R6 Yes but you had a good reason to be there, exactly why it's not okay for a douche like this guy to monopolize the bathroom.

R58 He claims the pilot broke down the door and dragged him out, pants-less.

But no one filmed it. No one corroborated it. No one independently said "Hey, guess what I just witnessed on my flight!"

They were probably descending to land and he was refusing to come out of the lavatory.

Well, you don't exactly walk away from a Code Brown.

Jesus Christ (!), shit or get off the pot. You know he was jerking off or sticking diamonds up his ass.

Fran Leibowitz says there are 2 kinds of Jews, normal and crazy. We know what kind this guy is.

R62 - I'm betting on the latter. Swallowing gems so that they won't get caught in US customs.

Now - I will say, if you've ever had Montezuma's revenge or food poisoning, you literally need to be close to a bathroom because it's that bad.

But he never claimed that. So he's lying - and doing something illegal. If he was in there for descent, flight could have missed their landing time and they may have been low on fuel.

I really wish there were more penalties for frivolous lawsuits.

[Quote] A constipated toilet hogger can still produce volumes of stinky flatulence.

In fact, it might produce more.

With a normal bm, the turd plunges into the water, which absorbs much of the degassing at least momentarily until flushing occurs.

But with a constipated bm, the turd emerges partly from the anus as the defecator struggles, meaning its body is exposed to the open air, degassing its fetid odor. In fact, the defecator may actually be wriggling about on the bowl in a panic, which would waft the turtle-head of the turd to and fro, only increasing the aeration.

So sayeth the Lord.

My mother lived in a gated adult community in south Jersey. The orthodox Jews were trying to get in there. Nobody wanted them including the sizable number of secular Jewish homeowners. Though I don't know how you can keep them out without being accused of religious prejudice. Something about how they try to avoid paying taxes and homeowner fees because of their religious beliefs. Don't know how it turned out but I never saw them there.

Yes, some Orthodox Jews are routinely water cannoned by Israeli forces every time there is a protest.

I had a friend in high school whose father owned a car dealership. He was Jewish, but reform. His father really hated dealing with the ultra-orthodox and the hasids, whom he referred to as “the hats.” He told a story about how they sold him some cars, then when the cars were delivered they demanded more money for this-and-that reason. My friends father wouldn’t pay. Later that same day, the hasids snuck onto the property and tried to steal the cars back!

I'm with R22. Close this stinky thread.

The hasidic Jews and the insular Orthodox Jews have both a martyr and superiority complex. Most reform, conservative and liberal Orthodox Jews hate them.

I've personally known many, many wonderful Orthodox Jews - BUUUUT, they were 'in the real world' - had jobs at regular employers, went to regular high schools and universities, etc.

There's a huge difference between the two. Just because you practice an Orthodox version of a faith it doesn't mean you're the same as the 'don't interact with anyone else' cults claiming to be the same.

I've not known the really insular ones because - well, you're not really allowed to.

[quote] No sympathy. The aircraft is not the place to arrange for a leisurely dump. Quick, emergency release only.

If you're constipated, that's really not up to you.

I don't think there was any reason for the pilot to personally get that violent with the man, regardless of his bathroom hogging. Isn't the head flight attendant capable of handling this without the pilot getting involved? Passenger should have been told to return to his seat until he did. I'm not sure what the protocol is from removing a passenger from a lavatory before landing if there is non compliance, but there must be a policy.

Exposing him does indeed sound like grounds for a lawsuit.

Team flyer.

Not sure, R64, if thanks are in order for that explanation, or not.

These are not sworn statements. This is just what the lawsuit alleges. You can allege almost anything in a lawsuit—but what proof do you have, is all that matters.

R72 believes everything he reads. You're special. As in needs.

If you have constipation stay home. Diarrhea? Stay home.

Riiiight. He was in there jacking off.

Diarrhea is usually unplanned, r76

If only I could plan my diarrhea!

I read once that haredi are big scammers like the FLDS. Basically living off the governments tit, lazy bastards.

I saw some movie based on a memoir by a woman who escaped and it was eye opening. My only experience with Jews has always been with liberal types so these fundies seem nuts. Why would anyone choose to live life with so many ridiculous and restrictive rules? It's exhausting as if misery is the goal.

This is CLAIMED:

“With Sebbag leading Liebb, the pilot proceeded to repeatedly push the [two] back to their seats while making threats of getting [them] arrested and making scathing remarks about their Judaism, and how ‘Jews act’,” the lawsuit continued."

Is this true? Evidence?

R80 Look up the village of Kiryas Joel, NY.

It's one giant welfare pit. Everyone has 30 kids. Everyone's on food stamps. The women aren't allowed to work, and the men are all in "rabbinical studies" instead of working.

They're also welfare queens in Israel. They vote like Nazis, reproduce like NBA stars, and contribute fuck-all to the economy.

I saw a Property Brothers episode where they were working on a house for a young Orthodox couple. They seemed nice and fairly normal but the brothers had to work in two separate kitchens for their bizarre dietary laws.

This story is so fake. There isn’t a moment in what this guy is saying that’s believable.

Constipated? No.

Anti-semetic comments from the pilot? No.

Exposed genitalia? No.

The Yid was probably in the John hoovering forbidden food and drink.

R83 And don't forget a wig stand for the lady's weird little religious hairpiece. Orthodox women do not show their hair in public after their wedding.

They're like Muslims in that way, only even less lively.

I like the "Hitler in the Bowl" comment; its probably what they serve on Wednesdays now at the White House commissary (followed by Stalin on a Stick on Thursdays)

Dear Lord in Heaven!

Let's face it, these cunts are weird, entitled, adamant, demanding, sloppy, and for the most part, have highly questionable hygiene. I can see why they're hated.

R72 = Yisroel Lieb

R72 any PROOF the pilot did what he's been accused of? I mean I suppose it's possible but it is career suicide.

A shanda!

Does nobody understand what constipation is???

I feel this was more a hemorrhoid issue.

[quote] One of them sued because his inflight meal wasn't Kosher - He produced no evidence, just vague accusations of HITLER IN A BOWL!

In the late 90s, I next to one Israeli teenager who ordered a Kosher meal and tried to steal my (surprisingly tasty) pumpkin soup, spinach and ricotta ravioli and pear and rocket salad because she was suspicious of the mystery tofu duck on her tray.

Did you slap her hand as she attempted, r95?

Airplane bathroom doors don’t need to be broken into, there’s another unlocking mechanism aside from the handle.

I call bullshit from the plaintiff.

Don't mess with United or the shit flies.

Stealth Scatovitz thread.

Grinder hook-up gone horribly wrong

*Grindr

The first paragraph of the article is hilarious

You got that right, R46!

United is a shit carrier.

If he was constipated there was no stink. Yet.

R16

A month ago, I flew from Austin to Cancun in 90 minutes.