Trump is personally managing the Kennedy Center and promises “good shows” like “Hello Dolly” and “Cats”

I think the Music Man is the perfect Trump musical.

It could be updated and Dr. Hill could sell Ivermectin for Covid.

Oh, and this time the kids die.

Kinda like a merger of Music Man and Rhinoceros.

The Medicine Man!

Oh look. Another Trump thread.

r3, never tire, more are on the way.

Roseanne would be the perfect Dolly Levi!

[quote] His redecorating plans include “the seats, the décor, everything”

Expect lots of gold.

That gigantic "mud sculpture" bust of Kennedy will be one of the first things shitcanned. A gigantic Trump sculpture will replace it.

They should stage "Sweet Charity" with Lara Trump.

Yes, Roseanne Barr in “Cats”?

How about Mel Gibson as Wonka?

Nancy Grace reciting The Vagina Monologues

“Peter Pan” starring Roseanne Barr.

R11 I think Mike Johnson will be doing The Vagina Monologues.

Mike Johnson will be doing Joseph and the Technicolor Coat.

I can't wait to hear Roseanne sing "Memory"

Do you think any Broadway production is going to want to play for him?

Mike Johnson will be doing the male cast members Joseph and the Technicolor Coat.

He himself will play the role of Dolly Gallagher Levi.

No one will probably do anything. Kennedy Center is being destroyed. Watch them sell it or raze it.

Kid Rock in West Side Story.

Springtime for Hitler

Seriously trump or no trump this is a show I’d go to see.

I'd love to see Trump as Edna Turnblad in Hairspray

...more like Queen Carlotta in Desperate Living, R22.

[quote]He himself will play the role of Dolly Gallagher Levi.

Over my dead body!

Boycott the Kennedy Center.

Don't engage with Trump or his sycophants.

What, no Fiddler on the Roof?

Marjorie Taylor Greene IS "Mame"!

Lauren Boebert IS "The Unsinkable Molly Brown"!

Elmo will lead the audience in a Seig Heil salute before the start of Follies for Hitler.

Madison Cawthorn will solo on "Tomorrow Belongs to Me."

No My Fair Lady, West Side Story, South Pacific, Camelot? Pippin???

Kellyanne as “Pussy Galore”.

Varist Letty will be dancing the seven veils. Ping pong balls in the back room showing for large donations.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Chuck Grassley in a remake of “Some Like It Hot”.

Kash Patel as Gandhi.

Susan Collins performing a one-woman show titled "My Concerns".

During intermission, there will be Jardiance commercial with the jingle sung by Harriet Hageman.

No revivals of Rocky Horror for sure. Alien Transvestite Transexuals. Three strikes.

How about staging " Follies" using actual Congresswomen as chorines - Susan Collins, Cindy Hyde-Smith, Elise Stefanik, Lindsey Graham, Marsha Blackburn, Harriet Hageman, and Nancy Mace? Of course, Melania would be Phyllis and Marla Maples as Sally.

Miss Lindsey is carried on a lectica to the stage by Brett Kavanaugh, Herschel Walker, Pete Hegseth, Sean Hannity, Jesse Watters, and Tim Scott.

In all seriousness, he thinks Camelot and Fiddler will sell tickets. Plus, the British shows from the 80s. With non-Equity casts.

Martha-Ann Alito and Ginni Thomas will sing “She’ll be Coming Around the Mountain When She Comes” and other MAGA favorites.

R31, sorry but South Pacific and West Side Story have too many "ethnic" characters. That's DEI!!!

How many performances will have blackface?

[quote] Martha-Ann Alito and Ginni Thomas will sing “She’ll be Coming Around the Mountain When She Comes” and other MAGA favorites.

Neither of them have come in 40 years.

R44, you'll love Scott Baio as Othello in blackface!

The Village People in A Chorus Line!

“Tristin and Isolde” starring John Schneider and Caitlyn Jenner.

R43, THEN CHANGE THEM

CATS?! Jesus Christ, at this point CATS is nothing more than community theatre.

Unfortunately, the Kennedy Center needs to fail spectacularly to teach the motherfucking criminal a hard lesson.

Marla Maples IS Grizabella!

They simply MUST put on The Producers.

How about Laura Osnes as Joan Of Arc: Covid Martyr

Or rather, they should finish the complete show, Springtime for Hitler and put it on with a straight face.

Leigh-Allyn Baker (Ellen on W&G) is a big MAGA who moved from California to Tennessee. I'm sure there's something for her there. Maybe a heavily censored version of Will & Grace, called "Rob & Ellen"?

[quote] Trump also complained about work covered under the Kennedy Center's agreement with IATSE. Referring to the country singer who frequently accompanied him to campaign events, Trump stated "Lee Greenwood wanted to sing a little song today, and because of the cost and the union structure, for him to sing a song just for the board, was going to cost $30,000. They wanted $30,000 to move a piano. So you can't have that. We're going to fix it up."

^ Will Greenwood be playing Old Deuteronomy in the Cats production?

Yes, he's turning The Kennedy Center into his private little jukebox to play Memories from Cats so he can think about all the women that he inappropriately touched

What about The Sound of Music? Starring Laura Trump as Maria so she can showcase her exquisite vocal range and James Woods as Baron von Trapp. All other roles filled with MAGA actors who no-one else will employ. Even Musk can have a role. During the NAZI parts, the MAGA audience can cheer and clap and stomp in support of the NAZIs! It would be a win win for American culture...

Laura Loomer starring as the Saw puppet in Saw:The Musical.

Richard Rodgers Cinderella should be considered…starring?

I guess Showboat and Ol' man River is out.

Aren't we about due for a revival of Oklahoma and South Pacific?

Ric Grenell is a big fat sycophantic pussy who couldn't find his way out of a paper bag.

Trump has no idea how to run a theatre. He caused his casino to go bankrupt. Who does that?

Trump always says he is going to fix things.

He has never fixed a fucking thing. Everything that Trump touches dies. And so will the Kennedy Center.

Trump, clueless as ever, doesn't realize there's a difference between D.C. theatergoers and the kind of people who go to shows in Branson.

Lady Lindzabella IS Grizabella!

It would be wonderful karma if the Kennedy Center was only able to book touring shows about Blacks, gays and/or Hispanics.

"The Wiz"

"Dreamgirls"

"The Color Purple"

"In The Heights"

"Rent"

"A Strange Loop*

[quote] Richard Rodgers Cinderella should be considered…starring?

Caitlyn Jenner

Kid Rock IS Chris in Miss Saigon with Carrie Underwood as Kim and Lady Lindz as Ellen. Rock sings Bui Doi to the music of Bawidabababababa

[quote]Laura Loomer starring as the Saw puppet in Saw:The Musical.

They would be able to save on prosthetics R61! Cheap and peppy!

Melania Trump as Miss Mona in "The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas"

She won't have to do too much rehearsing.

Lauren Bobo and Kristi Noam vying for the role Miss Gypsy Rose Lee causes some Republican infighting with Corey Lewandowski casting. Bobo insists on full nudity to update the musical and wins out in the end. A prudish Kristi vows to never suck his dick again.

R71, in Trump's version, all of the non-white people on stage are napalmed immediately after the opening number, the one with scantily clad girls whom he will personally audition. Each show will last 20 minutes and will end with the audience standing ang singing," God Bless the USA."

Lara Trump as Fanny Brice in "Funny Girl" - eat your heart out Beanie ! Jeanine Pirro as 'Mrs. Brice'. Maybe Peter Hegseth as Nicky Arnstein ? How's that for casting !

r74, I think Kim Guilfoyle would make the perfect Gypsy!

Rhonda Santos starring in Kinky Boots!

Kim has been shipped to Greece like Roz to France in 9 to 5.

Those poor Greeks.

Miss Lindz would make a mean leading dancer during "The Heat Is On In Saigon"

King Lear, with Trump in the title role, and Junior, Eric and Barron as the three daughters.

You'll love Kristi Noem as Celie in The Color Purple!

Blackface and Yellowface are both acceptable in this new Kennedy Center

Can't wait for the all white "Hamilton."

R84. Don't forget Cuntface.

Every time he says something 80-year-old-man nonsense, benign opinion like this (of course some broad he was dating dragged him to Cats once and that’s the only musical he knows) I kind of like him. Like at his Tesla car show at the White House when he marveled that the dashboard is “all computer!”

And then I remember what a fucking sociopath he is and want to kill him.

Anyway, the Kennedy Center is the least of our concerns. And I do like Hello Dolly, so sure!

Why Kimberly Guilfoyle??!! Greece, the cornerstone and foundation of democracy, does not deserve such an injustice.

But then again, Trump does not believe in democracy.

Casey DeSantis IS Evita!

Maybe it can join the chitlin' circuit.

Kim wants good Greek young dick

R87. 'Hello, Dolly' has been done to death, and it's not on tour. So it ain't comin' to town unless the local black DC high school is performing it. And Trump and Grenell don't want no goddamn blacks on stage.

Lady Lindseybelle will be triumphant as Sandy in Grease!!! But who will be the pink ladies? Elsie Steponak and Sarah Hucklebees? Maybe Kim Gargoyle as Rizzo.

Imagine a musical with an all-hetero production team.

Yikes.

Lindz would be the company's go to leading lady. You just know there isn't a Republican dame who can Can Can quite like her.

Melania Trump as Norma Desmond in 'Sunset Boulevard'. Eric Trump as Joe Gilis. Lady Lindsay as Max.

"I get to cut off stepson head for real, no ?"

Sarah Huckabee Sanders IS Anna Christie!

R94 these men are all "straight". I suspect even Hegseth at least took a blowjob from a dude a time or two and it's where all that misplaced rage and forced butch demeanor stems from.

Cut off his head, R96?

R99 Who does Norma think she is at the end ? Have you seen the musical ?

Lady G will not rest until she plays both Martha and Maggie The Cat before the end of this administration

Cool. It'll all be shit you can see in any Ozark dinner theater.

R101, don't forget Amanda in The Glass Menagerie

Marjorie all alone in the moonlight

A brand new musical written by Mel Gibson depicting a period in the south during slavery - all acted by white actors in black face and one super special surprise guest in orange face.

I'd attend that R105!

[quote] What, no Fiddler on the Roof?

It’s on the list!

Who's gonna be matinee Dolly??

Fiddler will be written to portray Christians in the modern war against woke in America. Putin and Musk will produce from a script by Scott Baio and direction by Mel Gibson. Dennis Quaid to star.

We want "Goodbye Donny!"

What about me? I’m available!

I call it first- all the nearby restaurants die a slow and lingering death.

It’s the opening night of “The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie” and Jeanine Pirro is accused of Facism!

She’s quickly defended by the Board and the Evil Sandy gets to dress like a nun, but she’s still just a pee hooker.

"Kiddie Diddler on the Roof" starring a rotating cast of Evangelical Christian pastors and priests.

You're a good man, Charlie Brown, I just loves that snooopy!

"Porgy and Bess" starring Byron Donalds and Tim Scott, respectively.

Followed by the much-anticipated musical adaptation of "Amos and Andy."

[quote]They should stage "Sweet Charity" with Lara Trump.

Not with Laura Benanti doing her Melania?

I want to see Miss Linz as The Girl Who Cain't Say No.

Trump will mandate "color blind" casting, so that all shows listed by R69 will feature all-white casts.

"The only way to stop racism in showbiz is to kill DEI in showbiz."

Damn! Miss Lindzebelle appears, often the star, in most every show declares DL.

When Miss Lindzebelle tells you who she is, don’t believe her the first time.

R116, Amos and Andy poses a problem. Trump may want to keep blacks for demeaning, stereotypical roles.

They are for doing black jobs R121.

Young Frankenstein starring......BARRON!!!!!

The Trumpettes will be the headliners in Hair, tweaked to be a pro-Trump show.

Melania IS…

Salome!

(directed by Kathy Griffin)

He couldn’t do any worse. The crap that is out there now is atrocious.

In order to counter all of the shows which have featured characters based on Trump, he will order that any play or musical must ridicule one of his political enemies. It will begin with " The Miracle Worker," featuring a young Nancy Pelosi as Helen Keller, who falls off her stilettos every five minutes, bringing howls from the MAGA audience.

[quote]He couldn’t do any worse. The crap that is out there now is atrocious.

Watch this space.

Miss Lindsey was just BORN to play Blanche Dubois.

“Urine Town” with touring Ukrainian cast

“Salò**“ starring Minouche Shafik, Liz Magill, Claudine Gay, and Martha Pollack

**Full Audience Participation For This One You’re Going To Love It!

[QUOTE]Varist Letty will be dancing the seven veils. Ping pong balls in the back room showing for large donations

Cigarette puffing extra cost.

In his version of The Sound of Music the nuns turn the Von Trapps over to the Nazis.

Gossip is they're cancelling "Legally Blonde."

Folks, one very special night is going to be just like the glory days of Vaudeville.

Don is an expert marksman with full cast of death-defying donors.

Eric is an AMAZING mime!

Ivanka recites 18th century commodity trades.

Brown puts things on high shelves and then takes them down.

Stiffany will be handling cleanup.

Adult talent night

Will he put on Mame?

Caitlyn Jenner in a production of "Hedwig and the Angry Inch."

[quote]Caitlyn Jenner in a production of "Hedwig and the Angry Inch."

R137. Fixed it for you, now much more accurate: Donald Trump in a production of "Hedwig and the Angry Inch."

He's doing the farmer thing here...maybe he could play Curley in Oklahoma!

r136, see r27.

I suggest Oh! Calcutta!

No, they're keeping [italic]Legally Blonde[/italic], but now it will star Louise Linton (Mrs. Mnuchin).

[quote]Will he put on Mame?

Yes, and will also star.

Present Hole Theatre! Starring the United States of Elonia!!!!

Elon as Frank N. Furter

Elon as Edna Turnblad

Elon as Tracy in Hairspray would bring down the house.

Melania in Sunset Boulevard except Joe Gillis must kill Norma.

"Pigmalion"- An American billionaire sponsors a Communist prostitute immigrant- and falls in love while teaching her Class.

Elon as Veruca Salt in “Willie of Wonka”.

Kristi, Get Your Gun! starring Border Barbie KKKristi Noem. She shoots dogs and goats live on stage, while the Lindseybelles provide backing vocals.

Meghan "MyFather" McCain as Tracy Turnblad

There was an event at the Kennedy Center honoring Conan O'Brien and all the comedians there were ripping Trump to shreds.

“It’s an honor to be here at the Kennedy Center or, as it will be known next week, the Roy Cohn Pavilion for Big, Strong Men Who Love Cats,” John Mulaney said during his bit.

[quote] Meghan "MyFather" McCain as Tracy Turnblad

She's more likely to be in "Babe - The Musical."

R154 Cindy, that's not a nice thing to say about your daughter!

“… how dies a 78 year-old man…”. Sweeter words were never spoke.

He loves to micromanage because he’s a dictator.

[quote] Elon as Veruca Salt in “Willie of Wonka”.

Donald as Agustus, the fat German boy

129, In the musical "Oh, Streetcar"

If only Trump's deserved fate would follow Abraham Lincoln's sad demise at the theatre.

R136 = Lindsey Graham.

No more degenerate art?

Donald Trump, in his greatest role, as Willie Low-man in "Death of a Tesla Salesman!" Gives new meaning to "You're fired!"

Curiously, Trump never actually fires anyone face to face in real life. He sends a Tweet or has someone else do the firing.

[quote]Trump is personally managing the Kennedy Center

Trump is personally driving the Kennedy Center in the ground.

Because he's a big fat coward.

You do know that all of his "firings" on the Apprentice were fake, right?

R160, they should do a production of Our American Cousin

Mike Lindell in Death of a MyPillow Salesman

You can't deny, Miss Lindsey does have talent.

How about Donald Trump and Lindsey Graham as Big Daddy & Big Mama in "Fat on a Hot Tin Roof?"

Legally Bland.

“Hello Dolly” and “Cats”? Did Mizz Lindsaybelle come up these two?

Donald and Lindseybelle would make a hot Stanley and Blanche!

The "Fellow Travelers" opera is canceling its Kennedy Center run. Maybe Trump can do one with Lindsey and Ric Grenell

Kennedy Center Honor recipients (2025):

Jon Voight Mel Gibson Kid Rock Roseanne The Village People

You forgot Justine Bateman and Dennis Quaid, R176.

Now Trump is saying that he wants to overhaul the Smithsonian museums. The short-fingered vulgarian seems determined to stick his stubby little fingers into every pie he can.

He’s delegating it to JD. Usha had better keep her eyes open - the Smithsonian has a lot of antique furniture with sinuous, beckoning, come-hither upholstery.

I'm replacing the Black History Museum with the Orange History Museum

The "People are Saying Institute" and "Good People on Both Sides Museum".

Will makeup artists be able to portray Nancy Mace as Madam Butterfly?

My fat daughter looks forward to starring in the new ALL WHITE Dreamgirls. All she does lately, between scarfing down chicken parm dishes to go from Spaghetti Factory, is saunter about the house screeching some song about how she is not going. That’s looking increasingly likely, as my fat daughter is not going anywhere unless some immigrants come to widen the front door — and oh dear, now they can’t!

[quote] Now Trump is saying that he wants to overhaul the Smithsonian museums.

R178 What better place to rewrite history?

Will Donny & Marie be up for a Kennedy Center Honor?

The Kennedy Center Honors are destined to become the Kennedy Center Horrors.

Everything Trump touches dies.

The Kennedy Center will be no different.

Apparently, his "personal management" includes getting rid of all the Pride celebrations that were scheduled

Lovely. Hello Dolly starring Miss ‘’Lady Bug’’ Linsey Graham.

[quote]Now Trump is saying that he wants to overhaul the Smithsonian museums.

Not nearly enough gold, beautiful gold everywhere, plus chandeliers, Biden and Obama would never allow chandeliers...

Trump is dying to get Patti LuPone and Mia Farrow to star in 'The Roommate' at the Kennedy Center.

La LuPone appears to have a problem:

How many shows will feature Miss Lindsey?

Has he renamed it the Trump Center?