Angelina Jolie's brother James Haven marries 'The Real L Word' star

He made a lot of money loaning his image to Merriam-Webster for the entry for "Gayface".

Two of the most dysfunctional human beings on this planet.

I guess they really didn't stand a chance with Jon Voigt as their daddy.

Voight!

He married a lesbian?

I wonder if Angelina sucked her brother off as a wedding gift?

What a family of wackos. Angelina’s mom not only sanctioned sex for her at 14, she actually let her live with her boyfriend.

I could easily see the mom finding Angelina and James sexually experimenting as tweens and encouraging them to do it rather than explaining how those feelings should be channeled.

Yes, and they'll probably end up starring in a reality TV series about their marriage.

"So I Married a Dyke!"

James Haven was such a drama queen.

He gave an interview about how Jon was such a bad dad. The example he gave was that James could not attend prom because his dad wouldn’t pay for a limo, but instead offered to drive James and his date.

That was his Evil Jon Voight Story? That’s it? You couldn’t go to prom because your dad wouldn’t pay for a limo? For fuck’s sake.

Get a job at Target and pay for it yourself like every other teenager, you lazy sack of shit.

[quote] He made a lot of money loaning his image to Merriam-Webster for the entry for "Gayface".

I’m the new face of gay face!

Actually I grew up in a working class neighborhood and on prom night the limos were up and down my street, because parents wanted their kids to have a special night.

The fact that a movie star couldn’t be bothered and affected this “thrifty working class” attitude is telling.

Romi's IG profile says she is a "Certified Identity & Nutrition Coach." Wtf is an "identity coach"?

She is covered in ugly tattoos, with overinflated lips and seems a bit like a Great Value Angelina knockoff.

I have never heard of this Romi person, but after a quick scroll through her IG, she seems MESSY. She was engaged to a non=binary (woman) not that long ago. Both the non binary person and James Haven proposed to Romi in her favorite cemetary. Seems like she is the living embodiment of what Angie used to try and be. MESSY

I grew up in a wealthy town and my parents only paid for my suit and shoes so I could go to job interviews in the future. That was it. My date and I went in with other couples to pay for the hideous stretch Hummer. It was pink.

Presumably James had no friends, and his date ditched him because she thought he was rich.

Not Jon’s fault.

Who is the man, and who is the woman in this relationship?

This will end in tears.

He had to turn str8 to stay in Daddy's will.

I will never believe he is straight. He has major gay eyes, always did.

She found her safe haven.

R14 You let this thread down.

R14, it already has. Apparently they had a big fight on their wedding night.

And, I second R18, you missed an A+ opportunity.

He's feminine looking.

R7, 🎶 just driving around in Jon Voight's car.🎶

It’s interesting that he looks so similar to his sister and yet he doesn’t register as attractive/handsome to me. He’s odd looking. I guess that face only works on a woman.

Angelina has also had as much cosmetic surgery as Cher so there’s that.

R23 Maybe but she’s been a beautiful woman all her life.

Cher has been a beautiful woman all her life.

This is her 3rd marriage (all to men). She left her first marriage because she "wanted to go back to women."

She and Haven broke up the day after the wedding and attempted to have the marriage nullified.

He’s BALD?

[quote]Apparently they had a big fight on their wedding night.

When she found him sucking off a dude?

[quote] When she found him sucking off a dude?

No. He was sucking ANGELINA off. Or vice versa.

“I’m so in love with my brother!”

R30, I still think about that. I will never get why some people kiss their family members on the lips. That's bad enough. But Angelina french kissed him. That's a whole other level.

When was the last time he was seen with her? They used to be (ahem) very close.

Cringey...

He was working as a nanny (for Angelina) for a while.

[quote] Romi's IG profile says she is a "Certified Identity & Nutrition Coach." Wtf is an "identity coach"?

R10 It means he will soon identify as a lesbian. Or as a straight woman and she transitions too. Some clusterfuck. You read it here first.

Holy shit, they look like twins here, both very feminine. And Jon looks like Christopher Walken and Caitlyn Jenner combined (go to the 22 seconds mark)

He's one of the creepiest looking guys I've ever seen. He reminds me of a dancing skeleton decoration from a Spirit store.