LUIGI! (working title) - Spitballing the New Broadway Musical

Pop

Sicks

Stitch

Uh-uh

Sis, he’s a Hero!

Mangione

🎶🎼

He had it comin'

He had it comin'

He only had himself to blame

If you'd have been there

If you'd have seen it

I betcha you would have done the same

power games at play

these parasites simply had it coming

Dear Luigi Mangione

Deny, Defend, Depose!

Luigi Get Your Ghost Gun

Altoona Dreamin’

I Shot the Chairman

It needs a big Datalounge chorale number early in Act 2:

“We Are All Momma’s Mussy Today”

I’m still hummin those tunes.

I can't wait for the Central Park, carousel, dance number with the flying Monopoly money. And the BJ in the Ramble scene that precedes it.

That’s the freewheeling patio number^

Who Was That Unmasked Man? (I’m Flirting With Disaster)

Show-stopping power ballad by “lonely hostel clerk”

Backpack Full O' Dreams

What’s the status of the backpack?

It’s going to the Smithsonian

Luigi, Bring Me the Ax, er, Ghost Gun!

an anguished song performed shirtless in front of a climbing wall - with a self-searching theme - "am I more than a rich, smoking hot fuck boy?"

A raucous, tongue-twister song by the arresting cops… “Oh, you, pretty Pissy Pee Pants, Pissy Pissy Pee Pants (We Tased You!”)

"I Got Screws in my Spine"

"Luigi's Not So Happy Meal"

Meet Me In Altoona

A semi-nude, welcome to Riker's, hippy-hoppy, Aquarius/Let the Sun Shine in, dance orgy.

Bye Bye Chest Hair

The parodies have started..

Featuring the orange jumpsuit chorus.

Shirtless in New York

Maybe we can get the copyright to Every Breath you Take...

Every step you take,

Every trade you make

Every bill you fake

Every claim you break ,

We'll be watching you

Every single day

Every lie you say

Every scam you play

Every sham delay

We'll be watching you

Having it Luigi's Way

Murder! With a Side of Hashbrowns!

The Hawaiian Beefcake Bro Surfers featuring Luigi's roommates from Hawaii.

The chorus boys are going to have a blast—

Prep school boys, College Frat Dudes, Surfer Bros, and the Orange Jump Suit Chorus!

And bus passengers!

Luigi Arms!

Luigi!

I've just met a boy named Luigi,

And suddenly that name

Will never be the same

To me.

OT: The only Luigi I ever knew was from Mario Brothers.

R9 In which Luigi reveals to the audience his inability to get it up. It can be his “What I Want” number.

I heard the defense may ask Luigi during the trial to try on a condom found at the scene. If it doesn't fit...

You've Got To Shoot A CEO Or Two

You fuckers are crazier than Luigi.

Luigi:

When my bullet

Hits his eye

Bloody mess

In the sky

That'sa MURDER!

When that fat

CEO

Hit the ground

Like wet dough

That'sa murder!

You can't stop the bullets, Bri

As they race all through your head!

You can try to stop those bullets, Bri

But you still will end up dead!

And you can try to stop my running feet

But I just cannot stand still ...

So the world keeps spinnin' round and round

I denied your claims and you hit the ground

I was lost till I printed guns and I found the waaaay ...

If I killed a rich man

Ya ba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dum

All day long, I'd biddy biddy bum

If I killed a wealthy man

"Deny THIS!"

"Whose Back Hurts Now?"

"My Manifesto."

"It's a Start!"

R40, Sung by Zac Efron!

"I'm not throwing away my shot, I'm not throwing away my shot"

Taint Misbehavin’

Another Backpack in Another Hall

Privilege Isn’t Everything

Can we get the rights to Working Class Hero?

Does anyone know Yoko?

"Neither Health, Nor Care: Talk Amongst Yourselves."

"It's Not Me, It's You."

"Death By Denial."

"Folks, we have a very special 'Larry King Live?' for you tonight. Our guest is Luigi Mangia, CEO of 'Chef Boyardee,' here to talk to us of his father, the late, great trumpeter known as Chuck Frangipane, who founded the company in 1925. Luigi has decided that the familiar elderly 'Chef' mascot will be killed off, you might say, and replaced by a younger 'Chef Transardi.'

Here to discuss the 'street's' reaction to this major shake-up and if it will trigger more are Randy Quaid, Joey Buttafuoco, Courtney Stoddard, and Pia Zadora.

Our phone lines are open. Go ahead, Lower Merion!"

Threads like this are why I pony up ~$3 every month for a subscription.

"Altoona Moon (Kaboom Kaboom)"

You bitches better write a role for Helen Lawson.

"The Midnight Bus From Georgia."

Make of our brows one brow

Day after day, one brow

Now we begin, now we grow

One brow, one heart

Only tweezers will part us now

[quote] You bitches better write a role for Helen Lawson.

This ain’t a charitable exercise.

"Deny, Defend and Depose!" will be the big ticket number.

"I'm not Denny, my name's Luigi.

Denny left you years ago.

My eyes are not blue, but mine won't leave you

'Til the sidewalk has touched your face."

Dispose not Depose. Oops.

Luigi is the new black

“I am Luigi!”

Final ensemble scene in an ICU, with patients successively standing up and ripping off their intubation.

It really should be an opera.

Or an operetta! Luigi's got a list!

I suggest a Greek chorus made up of frightened CEOs—Elon Musk, Peter Thiel, Jamie Dimon, etc.

They could have a song with a Tut Tut refrain

"The Mangione Behind the Mask"

Luigi Get your Gun!

Mangione of La Mancha

Ah, yes, r64. That great dramatic trilogy:

"Antipathy"; "Oedipus Wrecks"; and "Oedipus at Altoona."

Reports that he is gay so we need a big Act I number—When the Man Goes Up into the Mangione, that’s Amore.

“ He kept the gun. Moron”

We need a new number for Tommy the "expensive friend." How about a list song?

I AM AN EXPENSIVE FRIEND is a great refrain for a song.

Rookie officer Tyler Frye, closing in on our man:

“Pardon me boy, is this the Altoona McDonalds?”

“Yes, that is the guy. Would you like some fries?”

😮

R73, 👏👏👏👏!

What is it you cunt face?

East Side, West Side, all around the town

Luigi's feeling angry and someone is going down

He's the hot assassin that we all want to pork

He did the world a favor on the sidewalks of New York

What happened to CLASS?

The days where you could just pop a cap into some CEO's ASS?

I got some hot eye-talian sausage for you right here.....

Dear Luigi, twunk of my heart

Though confined, we never shall part

r23, I love it