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Am I asking too much for dinner to be ready (and WARM) when I get home from work?

Look, I’m not saying being the domestic one in the relationship isn’t work. I get that there’s a lot to manage around the apartment, and there’s emotional labor involved that I probably don’t even notice because I’m too busy working 40+ hours a week to keep the bills paid and the lifestyle afloat. But is it too much to ask for a simple chicken that isn’t burnt to a crisp? Roasting a chicken is not a five star culinary challenge. Did you even try?

It’s such a small thing, and maybe just maybe if they could handle that, we wouldn’t argue about every other little thing. Oh, you’re storming out to stay at a friend’s house again? Who’s paying for everything in this goddamn house? Your skincare routine? Your boutique gym membership? The endless parade of designer candles you insist we need? Me. That’s who.

And let’s not even touch your so called “side hustle.” You bought one NFT of some pixelated nonsense, and it’s done exactly nothing. Your “big break” isn’t coming anytime soon.

Fellow gays, what do you expect from your partners when you’re the one out there keeping the lights on? Should I just accept that they’ll never figure out how to use the vacuum, or should I buy one of those robot ones for Christmas and let it do the work? Help me out here.

by Anonymousreply 70November 28, 2024 2:17 PM

I am going to guess your partner is somewhere above your league so you accepted being the bread winner. You accepted these terms mentally a long time ago hoping they would change. They don't change. Either accept them as is, or break up and move on because you are becoming resentful. No Dinner does not need to be on the table when you get home. Fucking grow up.

by Anonymousreply 1November 27, 2024 3:01 AM

OP = Fred Flinstone

by Anonymousreply 2November 27, 2024 3:12 AM

Have you tried sticking one of the endless parade of designer candles up his ass OP?

Totally agree with R1. Your partner is obviously way out of your league and this is your life OP.

by Anonymousreply 3November 27, 2024 3:14 AM

We don't start sentences with "look." How embarrassing for you, OP.

by Anonymousreply 4November 27, 2024 3:16 AM

If he’s not working and I’m supporting him financially, then I expect pretty much everything to be done. Dishes and dinner every single day. Laundry and bins done every 2 or 3 days. Mopping, vacuuming, dusting, and a deep clean of the bathroom and kitchen at least once per week. I’m happy to go food shopping together on the weekend. Without kids, none of this takes particularly long. I have no problem doing it myself when I’m single, or sharing it when we are both employed. It takes a couple hours each day at most, which is absolutely nothing especially when you have entire days free. Get it done then spend the rest of your day doing whatever you feel like (hopefully applying for jobs and exercising). I would never complain. I’m not the type who likes to find superfluous odd jobs or make people do unnecessary work just to keep them busy. Just do the basics and I swear you have so much respect from me.

by Anonymousreply 5November 27, 2024 3:17 AM

OP is Ralph Kramden.

by Anonymousreply 6November 27, 2024 3:21 AM

What are your ages R5? How old are you and how old is he?

by Anonymousreply 7November 27, 2024 3:24 AM

Leave him. Now. Trust me, I've been there.

by Anonymousreply 8November 27, 2024 3:24 AM

How big is his cock OP?

This thread is useless without pics.

by Anonymousreply 9November 27, 2024 3:28 AM

[quote]R5 I’m happy to go food shopping together on the weekend.

Why does it have to be together? That sounds like a waste of his time. Just go out and do it yourself. He’s surely sick of anything relating to the house by the time the weekend comes.

by Anonymousreply 10November 27, 2024 3:29 AM

Yeah - if he brings in no income then he has to keep house - and shut up about it.

If not dump him and hire cleaning ladies / rent boys as needed.

by Anonymousreply 11November 27, 2024 3:29 AM

[quote]I’m too busy working 40+ hours a week

Bread winner? More like a dinner roll at best.

Get back to me when your regular work week drops to only 50-60 - and that's only because the firm instituted "quality of life" improvements - lol.

by Anonymousreply 12November 27, 2024 3:32 AM

OP, it's time to start smacking him around.

Show him who's boss.

Let him know that YOU are the man, and you deserve some respect.

Some nice bruises on his face will remind him of that, every time he looks in the mirror.

by Anonymousreply 13November 27, 2024 3:41 AM

OP = Pete Buttigieg.

by Anonymousreply 14November 27, 2024 3:42 AM

There's an obvious way for him to bring income into the household, if you think about it for a minute.

by Anonymousreply 15November 27, 2024 3:45 AM

Not at all, darling!?

by Anonymousreply 16November 27, 2024 3:46 AM

Soup is not a meal Vera!

by Anonymousreply 17November 27, 2024 3:48 AM

Sounds like your partner isn't ocd. Mine is and I get in trouble for leaving a cup in the sink overnight. I do love it tho and am so thankful my wife loves our home and keeps it clean. We have a rule, whoever cooks the other one cleans up that mess. I think that's fair as well as respectful. I'm the breadwinner but I do it happily for us

by Anonymousreply 18November 27, 2024 3:48 AM

If OP is the hung one then his bottom needs to smarten up, but if OP is the bottom… maybe just hire a maid.

by Anonymousreply 19November 27, 2024 4:17 AM

Maybe OP can get a second job so they can afford a microwave?

by Anonymousreply 20November 27, 2024 4:20 AM

I love cooking, doing things with fancy sauces, but for the love of god I cannot get a roast chicken chicken to come out as good at a restaurant. It's like that omelet thing where a chef being hired is asked to make a perfect french omelet perfectly folded with no filling leaking out, no stuff baked into the eggs and no browning on the outside. OP's expectation sound kind of high and dismissive at the same time.

by Anonymousreply 21November 27, 2024 4:25 AM

[quote]R21 I love cooking, doing things with fancy sauces, but for the love of god I cannot get a roast chicken to come out as good as at a restaurant.

Maybe you are holding yourself to too high a standard? It doesn’t have to be as good as a restaurant’s - just appetizing and decent.

You might improve it by brining the chicken overnight in water that you’ve added salt and sugar to (I think a half cup of each?) Then I think you cook the chicken for a long time on a lower temperature than most people use.

Look for more specific recipe instructions by America’s Test Kitchen (or in their magazine Cook’s Illustrated) (it can be an old copy) (like, years old.) Their approaches are often the best.

by Anonymousreply 22November 27, 2024 4:43 AM

Sugar is not required for brining chicken.

by Anonymousreply 23November 27, 2024 5:34 AM

Um, oil bird. Stuff cavity with aromatics. 30 minutes at 460 degrees, then 30 minutes at 30. Test for doneness w meat thermometer. Easy.

Low heat is not the way to go anymore.

by Anonymousreply 24November 27, 2024 6:00 AM

Oops, 30 min at 460 then 30 min at 420.

by Anonymousreply 25November 27, 2024 6:01 AM

Make your hobby hubby

Keep your hubby happy

If he's a little chubby

He's a happy pappy!

With Rockenspiel!

by Anonymousreply 26November 27, 2024 6:09 AM

[quote]R23 Sugar is not required for brining chicken.

Then why do many brining instructions include it?

I didn’t make it up.

by Anonymousreply 27November 27, 2024 6:28 AM

She sounds like a lazy bitch OP. Tell her you EXPECT a hot dinner and lubed pussy every night , or she can kiss the Amex and the BMW buhbye.

by Anonymousreply 28November 27, 2024 6:39 AM

“HE” you stupid cunt, R28.

by Anonymousreply 29November 27, 2024 6:57 AM

[quote] If he’s not working and I’m supporting him financially, then I expect pretty much everything to be done

How much do you make and provide him, OP? Because I’m guessing you don’t pay the full minimum wage for a full time live in domestic servant, chef and sex worker.

by Anonymousreply 30November 27, 2024 7:08 AM

I’m sorry, honey. I spent the whole day masturbating to video of a guy hotter than you.

by Anonymousreply 31November 27, 2024 7:15 AM

He’ll be even worse when you’re dead:

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 32November 27, 2024 7:24 AM

I haven’t been in a relationship since the Reagan Administration.

Do people even like each other anymore?

by Anonymousreply 33November 27, 2024 7:28 AM

OP,

You can bring home the bacon.

Fry it up in a pan.

And never ever let you forget he's the man, 'cause you're a WOMAN!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 34November 27, 2024 7:30 AM

What OP thinks is happening when he is at work:

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 35November 27, 2024 7:32 AM

This is what OP really wants.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 36November 27, 2024 7:36 AM

After getting laid off once, I took a few months off and played house husband.

The house was spotless and I cooked a real multi course meal almost every single night. The best either of us have ever eaten. I even made him a breakfast green smoothie and packed him lunch each morning.

He later admitted that he lost respect for me and it turned him off.

by Anonymousreply 37November 27, 2024 8:10 AM

I bust my ass all day at the marketing factory. I even took extra shifts at a fake email job to put him through some silly woodworking course so he could “start his business” and every night I come home to him on the couch mindlessly scrolling through accounts of men arranging midcentury modern furniture. If I confront him he always has an excuse like “I literally just finished reorganizing the throw pillows by Pantone shade” or “I was about to start pruning the monstera!” All I ask when I get home is to have my pickle on a plate and my egg boiled. But that’s too much.

by Anonymousreply 38November 27, 2024 8:27 AM

Talk to him about it. Communication is the most important thing.

by Anonymousreply 39November 27, 2024 8:29 AM

Grow a pair and leave! He’s a spoiled lazy no good manipulative leech. No excuses for not doing his share of cooking he’s not a child. You don’t have a real caring partner, you have a lazy roommate who’s using you so he can live the princess lifestyle. Enjoy being a doormat slave to an entitled pig who clearly has no respect for you.

by Anonymousreply 40November 27, 2024 8:36 AM

Wow R37 that is COLD

by Anonymousreply 41November 27, 2024 8:37 AM

Yes; you are asking too much. From my experience, you're the kind of person who decides to come home anywhere between 5:00 and 8:00 PM and don't even have the courtesy to let your partner know about your schedule. You're no better than one of the service/delivery persons who may/may not show up between 8:00 AM & Noon OR Noon & 4:00 PM, but will not most likely NOT show up during any of these times.

The issue here is your selfishness and expectations that the rest of world cater to you. I pity your partner.

by Anonymousreply 42November 27, 2024 8:42 AM

In the spirit of R35's response and OP's gripe, I give you this:

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 43November 27, 2024 8:45 AM

Alright, I will play. So OP if you expect him to be like a little house wife YOU also need to keep up your end of the bargain. That's more than paying the bills. When was the last time you bought him some expensive jewellery? A watch maybe? Took him out for a night on the town? Let him decided what cloths you can wear? Decide who and who is welcome in your house as the host? Socialize with the other house husbands at lunch picking up the tab with your credit card? Let him manage the household budget, joint checking account?

by Anonymousreply 44November 27, 2024 8:57 AM

Coupledom is creepy.

by Anonymousreply 45November 27, 2024 9:34 AM

OP thought he was marrying Donna Reed.

by Anonymousreply 46November 27, 2024 9:42 AM

you want a maid and a cook? then fucking hire one.

by Anonymousreply 47November 27, 2024 9:50 AM

Next complaint is about how OP's other half does not do windows.

by Anonymousreply 48November 27, 2024 10:10 AM

OP, you completely despise your partner. It is clear in everything you said.

So be fair to him and leave him.

Plenty of people work a lot more than 40 hours a week and come home every night to do their own cooking, cleaning and laundry. Or, if you're spending so much money on him, spend it on professionals to do that work, and carp at them about how much you spend on them.

by Anonymousreply 49November 27, 2024 2:26 PM

Nah, R6.

OP isn’t Ralph. OP is a liar, & this never happened.

by Anonymousreply 50November 27, 2024 3:05 PM

[quote] Look, I’m not saying being the domestic one in the relationship isn’t work. I get that there’s a lot to manage around the apartment, and there’s emotional labor involved that I probably don’t even notice

There was a huge amount of emotional labor involved in my reading and rolling my eyes at your OP. I hope you noticed.

by Anonymousreply 51November 27, 2024 3:11 PM

I volunteer to send OP’s husband some crock-pot dump recipes so there is always a warm meal waiting and ready.

They seem to be some combination of frozen chicken breasts, orange juice, barbecue sauce, French onion soup mix and garlic powder served with noodles.

by Anonymousreply 52November 27, 2024 3:26 PM

Ok I'm curious, on the off chance this is real, and it smells fake. But if it's real. Did OP's boyfriend actually profess to WANT to be a cooped up housewife all day every day? Did you both decide on this, mutually? Or did it just happen.

by Anonymousreply 53November 27, 2024 3:35 PM

Fake or not -- if two grown adults live together as a committed couple, and only one of them brings in any income, the other guy is getting shelter, food, and possibly his spending money and healt insurance all paid for. For that the guy should do necessary domestic chores - they don't have to be Martha Stuart level by any means, but come on.

It is also implied that the OP's partner is striving to make it in some creative career -- which will take up most of his time, but plenty of aspiring actors, etc wait tables and the like to keep a roof over their head -- and I'm sure clock more hours than it takes to keep the bathroom reasonably clean and make a basic meals.

by Anonymousreply 54November 27, 2024 4:43 PM

OP, Chasten is never going to improve.

by Anonymousreply 55November 27, 2024 4:46 PM

OP, I believe my father sent a very similar letter to Dear Abby in 1956.

by Anonymousreply 56November 27, 2024 4:46 PM

Fake or not if the guy is this hot shut up and eat cereal and consider yourself damn lucky. Make sure you buy milk. Unless you like dry cereal and don't want to have to clean a bowl and spoon. If you do like cereal with milk clean the bowl right away or the left over bits of cereal become like concrete stuck to the bowl and you've got to soak it for a while before the cereal comes off.

by Anonymousreply 57November 27, 2024 4:55 PM

No one to blame but yourself OP. You let it happen. You selected this entitled do-nothing and allowed him (assuming you're males) to sit on his ass at home. Strap on a pair and tell him to either get a job and contribute or vacate the premises. If (God forbid) you're legally married to this person, well that's a whole different ball of wax.

by Anonymousreply 58November 27, 2024 5:03 PM

OP = Don Draper, season 1

by Anonymousreply 59November 27, 2024 5:11 PM

Are you reading this Colton?

by Anonymousreply 60November 27, 2024 5:13 PM

I don't believe a fucking word OP wrote and as and EST it's feminine and dreary, and I think unintentionally so.

by Anonymousreply 61November 27, 2024 5:24 PM

[quote]R54 Fake or not -- if two grown adults live together as a committed couple, and only one of them brings in any income, the other guy is getting shelter, food, and possibly his spending money and health insurance all paid for.

Most couples/families cannot survive on a single income. Which is why the re-popularized concept of the “trad wife” is rather ridiculous. It’s not sustainable for most households in the west, where we have a certain level of standard of living expectations.

by Anonymousreply 62November 27, 2024 6:59 PM

Why not pick up a roast chicken on your way home?

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 63November 27, 2024 7:01 PM

I think OP should take up cooking as a hobby.

It can be very relaxing. And he can have all the food the way he likes it.

by Anonymousreply 64November 28, 2024 2:33 AM

I love that R57 will lower himself to eating lucky charms for dinner if the dick is of adequate quality.

by Anonymousreply 65November 28, 2024 3:54 AM

[quote] Fellow gays, what do you expect from your partners when you’re the one out there keeping the lights on? **** Help me out here.

I only expect NOT to be scalded with a pot of hot grits when I am in the tub enjoying my post-work scotch on the rocks. So far so good.

by Anonymousreply 66November 28, 2024 9:40 AM

OP living with the gsy male equivalent of Peggy Bundy.

by Anonymousreply 67November 28, 2024 9:50 AM

The problem is your partner’s pronoun is “they.”

[italic] They [/italic]almost never work out.

by Anonymousreply 68November 28, 2024 10:14 AM

😂 😂

by Anonymousreply 69November 28, 2024 1:48 PM

I noticed that, R68. No wonder OP's having issues.

by Anonymousreply 70November 28, 2024 2:17 PM
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