Legal experts of DL... should I get gay married before Jan 20, 2025?

If you live in a blue state that has adequate civil right protections for gay people-I would say go for it.

It’s easier to outlaw new marriages than to dissolve existing ones.

OTOH it’s harder to be closeted if you are married and if you think you are going to need to be closeted that’s a consideration.

No, don't do it until you get a prenuptial. Prote t yourself and your assets.

What does your partner say?

Dear, the Supreme Court has not yet ruled on the legality of marrying imaginary people.

He's from a deeply religious family so it's not as clear cut for him as it is for me. I hear you on the prenup and agree.

What’s going to happen is Obergefell will be overturned and gay marriage will be up to the states, however, under the Constitution, all states must recognize the validity of other’s marriages, so you won’t be able to get married in a conservative state, but you can live there (if you must). Ultimately, there are those who might try to ban the federal government from recognizing gay marriage, but I don’t think they will have the votes for that any time soon.

There is a Supreme Court case (Windsor) that requires the federal government to recognize state gay marriages, so the conservatives would also have to overturn that decision .

You should regardless of fear over Trump just because it makes things easier in case of emergency. If he's the one, just do it.

Say YES to the Dress!!

Get married if you want to, but I think it's more important to do estate planning (will, healthcare proxy, etc.) because if the marriage is no longer valid (God help us!) you need the estate planning anyway.

We already have all of that r11 (and thanks for your post). What would be additional benefits of getting married I wonder?

It's okay, OP- they're just going after the trannies.

At no time ever has it been suggested that same sex marriage is in jeapordy. Where is this panic coming from?

Clarence Thomas has said the gay marriage decision is up next, r14. It was decided on the same theories as Roe.

There was panic enough for the Senate to pass the Respect for Marriage Act, r14. Might be better for you to sit this one out and not spread misinformation if you don't know what you're talking about, my dear.

Sorry — Congress, not just the Senate

OMG R14. Are you brain dead? How is it possible you haven't heard them talking about overturning gay marriage. They've never stopped talking about it. How can you be so fucking clueless? You must be a troll.

The first "Conservative promise" of Project 2025 is a return to traditional family values. This is the wording: "Restore the family as the centerpiece of American life and protect our children". Then they go on to talk about traditional family values.

Traditional family values means heterosexual people raising heterosexual children to the exclusion of all other people. Protect our children means protecting them from gay child groomers and drag queens and trans ideology.

I really don’t give a shit!

It may not matter. With complete MAGA control of Congress they can decline to extend any federal recognition or protection to same-sex marriage. You can marry in CA but when you go to TX your marriage need not be recognized by the state.

OP, yes, marry now.

Soon enough gay marriage won’t be a thing.

R14? We just had a Fascist take over of our entire Fed. We are now fish in a barrel. Wake the fck up kiddo. Danger everywhere. Gay people are high-risk status. Wealthy people will have (some) protection if they remain silent. This is how people stay alive during a holocaust guy. They’re building camps in south TX and GA. Go look up what’s happening to privatized prisons on the stock exchange. Camps. In America. In 2024.

Not trying to terrify you, I’m trying to keep you alive.

Don't marry. Adopt.

Seriously. Can an adult adopt another adult, giving the adoptee all rights as a family member, i.e. inheritance, visitation, etc.?

I've seen lots of MAGAs assured worried gay people that gay marriage isn't under threat - they cite Trump's love of the gays and the fact a same-sex wedding took place at Mar-A-Lago!

When they get proven wrong, the annoying thing is they won't say "oh no, I said Trump wouldn't come for gay marriage, I was wrong, I'm starting to regret my vote", they'll either keep quiet or they'll say "well, gay people don't need marriage anyway, Trump still loves them!"

What do you mean by "years?" .. Two, 25, 40? If you've mixed assets or own property together, you should probably think about it. Similarly, if you plan to have kids. .. And remember when you get married, you're also responsible for your spouse's debts.

Just elope to Canada if it gets banned in the US.

I hope Trump's corrupt Supreme Court outlaws gay marriage.

What I want is a 24-7 shitshow with pitchforks and torches!

I think you should both get beards and then see each other on the sly. Be safe, not sorry.

OP Just say married. Getting "gay married" is how hicks say it.

If you've been together "for years" and haven't pulled the trigger, then don't get married out of fear. Absolutely not. There's a reason you haven't gotten married although you might not be able to put it into words.

If you do get married, get a prenup, as stated.

Adoption? Absolutely not. It's irreversible. Doris Duke, the tobacco heiress, adopted a woman (I think they were lovers). Then, Doris tried to unadopt her. Could not do it. Not legal. Daughter ended up with a hefty amount after Doris died.

Evan and Keith from "Bargain Block" have recently stated they have no desire to tie the knot anytime soon.

Take it from them, OP.

If the GOP succeeds in outlawing gay marriage, even the existing ones will be outlawed.

It is very difficult to have just new ones outlawed because having two different statuses is ripe for legal challenge.

Reader, I gay-married him.

Many rights of marriage can be created through legal contract—like wills, trust, healthcare proxy, etc.

Be sure to create those even if married.

If you have a kid through a surrogate and the kid is genetically related to one partner, do a second parent adoption. Don’t rely on marriage rights to have a legal right to parent the kid.

Thanks for your insight all! I intentionally wrote gay married to bypass the few posts that would have clarified it would be a same-sex marriage. We've got such contracts r35 and no kids. I hate having to ask this question.

I'm not an American so there will be some holes in my knowledge. However, is there actual any evidence the Trump government will do anything to gays? Or is this just hysteria?

Good luck to you, OP/R36.

Don't do it! You'll be separated anyway for the camps...married gays will not be allowed to stay together.

You should get married. Not sure what gay married is supposed to be since marriage is marriage and a wedding is a wedding.

Will we ever call it marriage?

[quote] Seriously. Can an adult adopt another adult, giving the adoptee all rights as a family member, i.e. inheritance, visitation, etc.?

YES!!!!!!!!!

[quote] Adoption? Absolutely not. It's irreversible. Doris Duke, the tobacco heiress, adopted a woman (I think they were lovers). Then, Doris tried to unadopt her. Could not do it. Not legal. Daughter ended up with a hefty amount after Doris died.

Adoption of an adult CAN be annulled. It can be annulled on the grounds of fraud, duress, undue influence, neglect or elder abuse.

Did Doris never hear of disowning a child or disinheriting? She must have had shit lawyers.

Adult adoption is a poor legal substitute for marriage, especially when it comes to (potentially) complex issues like inheritance. Marriage offers more protections, including spousal Social Security eligibility.

Well since I lived through it the first time, when my first partner and I had to have all our documents in place, power of attorney, health care proxy, iron clad wills etc. - it was still the federal government that was the most difficult - we couldn't file taxes as a couple, he had to claim the benefits he was on from my company as income, I couldn't get on his USAA insurance, couldn't be added to his car insurance without an additional policy.... on and on. I'm sure they are going to make it difficult again. I would say do it if you are in a blue state (I guess there are 14/50 where your marriage would be recognized if they turn it back to the states) - so then it may benefit you. Otherwise I would say skip it.

[Quote] I'm not an American so there will be some holes in my knowledge. However, is there actual any evidence the Trump government will do anything to gays? Or is this just hysteria?

Well…two current SCOTUS judges have publicly stated that gay marriage is not a constitutional right. The guy who developed the anti abortion laws where private citizens can sue each other wants to apply it to gay marriage.

project 2025 has a number of anti gay marriage, gay rights, and gay adoption measures listed.

[quote] Marriage offers more protections, including spousal Social Security eligibility.

Agreed. That is why we fought so hard for marriage equality. The law favors marriages. Married couples are given rights by law that would otherwise have to be the subject of contracts. No contract can give you the full breadth of federal and state benefits and advantages that marriage affords spouses.

When SCOTUS rules that same-sex marriage is NOT a fundamental right under the Constitution, the federal government and state governments will be free to abolish same-sex marriage. Even if those laws are not retroactive, they would immediately end any benefits same-sex couples may receive. It is a serious threat. We all should consult lawyers about how to legally protect as much of our property rights as allowed under the law and outside the protections of marriage.

Ask Clarence Thomas (and Ginny)

Don't do it, OP. Marriage is a big scam. You'll be divorced in 5 years, anyway.