Tucker Carlson "attacked by demon" in his sleep

That was no demon, that was a sidepiece.

Now, let’s add the part where Matt Gaetz implies on Tucker’s show that they’ve both been accused of heinous behavior:

"Rupert, we're through! Get it through your head and give back my house key!"

The whole article at op's link is horribly eye-opening. I had no idea he was such a wacko on a personal level or that the full quote about spanking was so much worse than the headlines. And, yeah, sure, those claw marks were from a demon. Maybe Satan was trying to drag him down to hell before their agreement had come due.

[quote]Maybe Satan was trying to drag him down to hell before their agreement had come due.

Seems rather ungrateful of the Dark Lord to attack someone who's been doing his bidding so well.

Tucker looks like a pudgy frat boy.

[quote]the full quote about spanking was so much worse than the headlines.

It was so fucking creepy. They're all showing their true colors in the home stretch.

Because of people like him people with real spiritual faculties are considered liars.

That's right!! I am a demon when you try to take me away from Daddy! I'll spank you so vigorously and claw your tits off!!!

Agree with R4. This is shockingly weird. I didn’t realize he was tinfoil hat crazy.

I would write it off as just as a hallucination that he decided to talk about in public for some reason if not for the scratch marks part. He's covering something up with a lie.

Tell me you’re a rapist without telling me you’re a rapist.

That's what you get when you try to top "Bossy Bottom" Bannon.

Gee, Tucker, maybe one of them 4 dogs you said were in the bed with you and your wife had something to do with the claws marks. Thats 8 claws rights there.

What an idiot

**16 claws. B and wife's hooves.

Not the whips and chains?

I mean, you KNOW Tucker is into sex with dominatrices. You can just look at him and know.

Nobody’s having sex with that

Was it the Demon Twink?

Calling Zak Bagans! Show yourself!!!

Maybe he needs to call a Psychic Friend.

Those sound exactly like sex scratches and where they would be from a woman underneath a man. GOOD on her for leaving evidence! I love that.

He still has scars? Let's see them. Oh you can't produce them? That's a shame.

His wife deserves him - she gets no pass from me.

Time for another "fishing trip" to get off drugs (temporarily.)

When I saw the headline I imagined Tucker being attacked by a barefooted demon in a blue robe.

Just go to the light, Tucker, and stay in your other dimension.

I ir just me or is the entire Republican Part and MAGAS going through Mass Psychosis?

He gives commentary on everything as it happens live.

Dealing with a verbally abusive Tuck (whether top or bottom), you know his wife has gone into survival mode by bringing in dogs for protection.

I think “attacked by a demon” is a euphemism for “Kellyanne Conway fucked me with a strap on and called me a dirty pig boy while whipping me.”

Please. I have standards.

So he had an episode of sleep paralysis and got clawed by one of the four dogs he was sharing the bed with and blamed Satan. Sounds very medieval. I suppose he thought the Salem witch trials were fair.

Hopefully the same demon impregnates his wife.

So, he's an adulterer or he's schizophrenic and seeing demons.

A true Sophie's Choice if I've ever seen one.

Not an adultery, at least nit in this episode. The wife was in bed with him unaware of any demonic presence (besides her husband)

He is as crazy as they come- evil crazy I might add.

[quote]Not an adultery, at least nit in this episode. The wife was in bed with him unaware of any demonic presence (besides her husband)

The thought is that he came home with scratches on him and explained them to his wife as being from a "demonic attack."

Whose thought? Did you read OP's article?

JFC, Classic PR move, when something bad happens, make up something worse. Justin Trudeau testifies that Putin pays Carlson IOW, Carlson is not only a proven liar, based on his recordings in NOV 2020 but he is a traitor and paid propagandist for one of our nation's worst enemies. Look, a squirrel!

This cunt should be boiled in a vat of Swanson’s chicken broth.

He's not really a Swanson heir. His stepmother was the Swanson. He was a McNear Lombardi heir until his mother cut him and his brother out of the will. They contested and got some money.

[quote]Whose thought? Did you read OP's article?

My thought, I am OP. Needless to say, I don't believe Carlson's story.

laura ingraham took it too far last time huh?

Sorry about the scratches. I'll trim my nails.

Raving lunatic sees Trump getting away with it and tries some, too.

Self mutilation.

His wife and dogs probably hate him.

[quote]He added that he explained the encounter to an assistant, an evangelical Christian, who told him: “That happens, people are attacked in their bed by demons.”

Trust me, guys: No self-respecting demon wants to possess THAT.

Did he eat the mousse?

[quote]He's not really a Swanson heir. His stepmother was the Swanson. He was a McNear Lombardi heir until his mother cut him and his brother out of the will. They contested and got some money.

Didn't further his great grandfather Ennis Cornelius owned many slaves.

This is so beyond batshit

It's all a scam. He's just pandering to gullible Christians.

He's not hot or even all that attractive, but I'd still fuck Tucker because he vaguely reminds me of a kindly, sympathetic (straight, married) counselor I had as a closeted troubled teen. God, I hate myself.

[quote]It's all a scam. He's just pandering to gullible Christians.

His buddy Rod Dreher has a new book out dealing with demons (and possessions, and generational curses, and demons pretending to be space aliens and a whole bunch of other nutty stuff). I wouldn't be surprised if they cooked up this Tucker Carlson demon attack together to drum up interest in the book.

You should, R51.

When surprise anal goes wrong. Next on Fox News.

What kind of rentboy in Carlson hiring? Freddie Kruger?