Tasteful friends: a "Philadelphia story" for your consideration

Love it except the kitchen and the renovated bathrooms - it was done on the cheap and it shows.

Is it a decent area? Street view looks fine - but a busy road.

Very cheap for a home like that.

The semicircular overhang is at odds with the overall design, and not in a good way.

Calling PhillyWhore!!

Or Philly Snoop.

awful. Let me guess: it is closer to Germantown than Chestnut Hill

About midway between the two, R4.

This is suspiciously cheap, even for Philly. Something must be seriously wrong with that house. The area is fine. This is close to Mount Airy and Wissahickon Creek.

I love the path with the pink tiles. On the ceiling!!

^bathroom.

" Street view looks fine - but a busy road."

Lincoln Drive is very busy and the crazy bitches driving like they're bats out of hell occasionally lose control of their vehicles on the winding road and crash into streetlights, utility poles and the occasional house.

$123 a square foot?

There's a Philadelphia story there all right, just not a good one.

And where did all the landscaping go?

The zip code is Mt. Airy

[quote]the crazy bastards driving like they're bats out of hell

FIFY

except for the egregious errors of the modern renovations, I love it. You just don't put a light gray in a Tudor. That kitchen is ridiculous. Fixing those are the type of thing you generally need to do when you move into a new house though. Bringing it back doesn't appear like it would be a huge hassle.

Faux Tudor is at the bottom. The sliding-off-the-building overhang is outrageously horrible. Rooms are ugly. The small front yard was trashed and unmaintained (never trust an owner who does this). Crowded onto a shitty lot.

It cannot be improved.

Match, meet gasoline.

The gray flooring and kitchen looks like something you'd have in cheap tract housing. Totally a mismatch withe hardwood floors, fireplaces, etc.

Even if you have to put in 500K for renovations this is a bargain. I think there is some serious issue.

I have absolutely no idea what's going on with this house, and scrolling down the listing page only further confuses matters. That much square footage for so little is odd as it stands, but the house previously sold in 2021 for $420K! You can also see the pics from that listing, which seems to have had zero renovations.

As for why it's so cheap, two thoughts. The first is this bit from the 2021 listing: "Magnificent huge tudor semi-detatched stone and masonry construction, sitting on a beautiful corner lot of almost a quarter acre. . Needs considerable updating, Serious interest only." The second can be found under "climate risks": somehow this house, located nowhere near a body of water, has a 99% chance of flooding within 30 years. And 25. And 20. Also 97% within 15 years, and 91% within 10 years. I've seen thousands of real estate listings over the years, but I can't recall EVER seeing anything THAT flood-prone, short of entirely flat cities like Miami and Houston.

It looks like the current owners spent six figures just redoing the kitchen and most of the bathrooms. The price likely reflects both its apparent placement in a flood plain, along with a renovation tab that would likely far exceed the home's purchase price, to truly revamp the entire place, put landscaping back in, and somehow protect it from floods.

It’s the sort of place I should, on principle, love. Tudor, kind of leafy, old construction, quirky detailing. But I despise almost everything about it. It just absolutely gives me the willies.

R7- I love ❤️ the datedness of that bathroom.

Thankfully Jeeves fetched my smelling salts after fainting at the sight of this abject hideousness, but the scratches from my attempt to claw my eyes out will take longer to heal. Perhaps ironically, the Pepto-Bismol pink bathroom (and bedroom) are making me need it for my stomach! I'm undecided which part is the most revolting: the faux "Tudor" aesthetic or the shockingly awful, and horrifically mismatched, bland modern gray grossness.

Can anyone explain why on EARTH a realtor would bother with a "virtual staging" of the place, also with far too modern furniture? Also, the fact that it was once owned by a state supreme court justice does NOT justify keeping its 3,000 sq ft "ballroom" intact as a quasi-office. And good heavens: what poor little girl has been living in that one tragic bedroom? By far the worst part: the attic. Sacre bleu!! WHY do they have those bizarre vertical "wedges"?!?

I concur with R14. This disaster needs matches and gasoline, to put it – and every Daughter of the American Revolution with an ounce of taste – out of everyone's misery!

I don't like anything about it, particularly not the stone or half timbers. It's overall very uncomfortable looking and surprisingly tacky.

They should film some gay porn orgies in there for some extra cash they'll need for renovations.

Was the tumor at the front once a veranda that went horribly wrong? Perhaps with rounded archways…..there is no way to meld that extension’s roof with the house in any manor - perhaps they replaced an orthodox onion roof…..

It's like five different houses in one place.

Why are the ceilings so low? The mirror in the “office” to make the library look bigger is a nice touch.

It looks like it was designed by Frank Lloyd Wright. Especially the round overhanging roof.

A simple awning would have sufficed.

Flood Factor is "Extreme", with a 99% chance of flooding in the next 30 years. Flooding is a perk only when in reference to mama's bussy.

That house has seen its share of wife swapping in the 80s.

Thanks for your input, Ms. Weaver! ^^^

Welcome to Mish Mash Manor!

Tile. PINK. On the CEILING! Why? HOW??

Seems huge for "semi-detached". The stone on the outside is weird---normally it would be brick. Fieldstone became popular after mock tudor went out of style.

[quote]It looks like it was designed by Frank Lloyd Wright. Especially the round overhanging roof.

That's just mean. FLW was an architectural master. This house is a masterful example of how NOT to build one. (Plus he never did anything Tudor-esque AFAIK.)

It’s like somewhere you could live feeling both at home and at Howard Johnson’s!

[quote]Lincoln Drive is very busy and the crazy bitches driving like they're bats out of hell occasionally lose control of their vehicles on the winding road

People don't even slow down during torrential rain. I was in a four-car accident at the other end of Lincoln Drive, just below Rittenhouse, a few summers ago, the person at fault kept going, and the police never showed up. As bad as Lincoln Drive is, I think Kelly Drive is worse.

To R36, Lincoln Drive is INSANE to drive on: R36 is right even in terrible weather conditions, People drive like madman on Lincoln Drive.

It's in Mt Airy, the neighborhood is changing over& lots of crime. Ghetto poor young men looking for easy scores, breaking into homes. Lots of Gay& Lesbian are buying homes in the area, but are discovering that some of the neighbors look at them as "Walking ATM machines"

BTW, Kelly Drive is worse to drive on, complete nutjobs driving on Kelly Drive, but that's all over Philly. Lincoln Drive near Rittenhouse St was where Teddy Pendergrass was being blown by a tranny when he crashed on Lincoln Drive.

Yes, Lincoln Drive is insane with its narrow curves downhill. It says 25 mph but people keep going at 60, even in a rain and with slippery leaves everywhere. Philadelphia driving....

mmmm rough trade at your doorstep.

[quote] As bad as Lincoln Drive is, I think Kelly Drive is worse.

I disagree.

It's one of the ugliest and most depressing "homes" I have seen in years.

Tudor revival mansion, done right.

Where are the gutters? How dry is that foundation with the drip line right against the fucking house?

The roof is rubber, so it may be recent, but that house needs gutters.

That staircase looks like it is oozing from an abdominal wound..... Not the kind of staircase where I would make a grand morning entrance in my swan slippers.

I hate Tudors.

r3, at your service.

that part of Lincoln drive is nestled in the fairmount park, it's really quick secluded and sylvan there

To R39, you are not that far off on that subject!!

Lots of available men in the area who will take $25.00 for "gas money". My work buddy Mitchell lives in that area with his partner, he can always find young men looking to "rake leaves& chop wood".

Let me guess R47. He does not save for retirement because he expects to be strangled with a desk lamp cord at age 62?

No it doesn't., R26.

Scary and hideous definitely not interested.

What the fuck is "scary" about this? I've never seen so many "MARY!" reactions in a Tasteful Friends thread. There have been much, much worse.

Looks like Sally Jesse house still for sale. let’s buy that for DL country club?

I like it. Especially the pink bathrooms. It does look like something right out of the stockbrokers belt in Surrey England.

R52, it would be perfect for the DL Country Club /Sex Party Lair, especially with the legal library to check whether the high-as-fuck twink can get you into trouble.

It's not shockingly cheap for the mixed-bag location.

And it's not shockingly cheap for a house that suffered death by 100 or so cuts: endless mini-,campaigns if Home Depot-fueled weekend projects, each done worse than the one before

The exterior has been fucked over, too, though not nearly so much nor so badly. All the same, much as I like Tudor and Tudor revival styles, this particular Philadelphia variation with the thin roofs that look like something from a model train set is not a great favorite. The large room with the beamed ceiling starts out rather well but is spoiled by too small windows.

There are much better houses of the period in that area that have better architecture and which have not been ruined (and in the same price range.)

You could not pay me to live on Lincoln. It's a curvy road, no enforced traffic laws, and it a very Philly thing to do to drive as fast as possible, tailgate, and cut people off who don't go the required 60+ mph. I used to live in Chestnut Hill, right on Stenton Ave, and was told by a neighbor, when I first moved there, to avoid Lincoln at all costs. Did I listen? Nope. But it only took one time and I've never driven it since. Cannot imagine having to deal with Lincoln insanity every day, and pay hundreds of thousands of dollars, to do it.

Lincoln has “required” 25, even 15 mph, but of course it’s Philly so nobody gives a shit. And traffic laws are not enforced there.

I’ve never seen anything like that curved staircase with ye olde Tudor support column right up against the middle of the bottom step.

[quote]Lincoln Drive near Rittenhouse St was where Teddy Pendergrass was being blown by a tranny when he crashed on Lincoln Drive.

How the fuck did I not know this?? (Had no clue Teddy was ever arrested for prostitution, period, let alone in Philly.)

[quote]It's in Mt Airy, the neighborhood is changing over& lots of crime. Ghetto poor young men looking for easy scores, breaking into homes. Lots of Gay& Lesbian are buying homes in the area, but are discovering that some of the neighbors look at them as "Walking ATM machines."

Phillywhore, I'm finding your commentary about the place quite interesting! I know the basics from visiting around a dozen times, but had no idea that Mt. Airy is now apparently going downhill. Is that also true for Chestnut Hill? In this case I'm wanting to know for my own mother: she's househunting up there, and while she'd prefer to live in Philly proper, she's understandably concerned about crime (as a single woman in her 70s, albeit in generally good health). She was originally thinking about a Rittenhouse-area condo, but that weird "teen rioting" thing a while back – when 100 or more went on a late-night B&E spree – is concerning.

Is it even *possible* to not live in an area with at least some crime nowadays? She's also considering the Main Line area if she can find a place near a SEPTA stop, but it's obviously way pricier and elitist, as well as much further out.

[quote]What the fuck is "scary" about this? I've never seen so many "MARY!" reactions in a Tasteful Friends thread.

Only one person said it was "scary." (I'd at least concede that the thought of the total renovation bill is a scary one.) Most are wondering, like me, why (or how) such a huge house went massively downhill over the past century; underwent a witches brew of horrifically ill-advised renovations; and is so bizarrely inexpensive given its size and grandeur – at least from the outside – alone. Now I'm also wondering about the area it's in: people driving 60 mph in mainly residential areas??

The "MARY!" reactions are mostly those of the core nature of these threads: our posters' refined tastes have been sullied by the sight of this architectural tragedy! We can never unsee this place.

It's stunning. I really like it a lot!