Tasteful friends: an "architectural masterpiece" in Texas - yours for a mere $18 million!

No.

me no like

That's a BIG NO!!

It has 14,000+ square feet and only 3 bedrooms?

I was suspicious from the first photo. I guess they're hiding it's on a busy street. It's hideous. The black bathroom with skylights and glass brick is bad but kind of spectacularly so.

It looks so CHEAP. Granted, whoever buys it will probably gut it. But still . . .

To add some background: it's located on the most prominent street in Austin, Congress Avenue, and is one of its extremely few remaining original buildings. I don't think the photographers were trying to hide it per se, but rather show it in a flattering light, though that part of Congress isn't all that busy. It dead-ends at the Texas Capitol three blocks north. If you've seen pics of Austin, you've probably seen Congress or South Congress; the latter is one of its most popular tourist hotspots.

I'm truly baffled who they think is a realistic prospective buyer for such a property. Even before Covid, that stretch of the street was pretty sketchy, with lots of homeless people and addicts milling about, and I assume it's gotten much worse since then. The techies who make up most of Austin's billionaire and/or celebrity class live either in the hills surrounding the city, which afford a ton of privacy (along with gated communities), or its highest-end condo towers with "discreet" entry via basement elevator and $30M units. Some live in Central Austin's traditionally fancy neighborhoods.

I've never been inside this building, but I went to a party once at a FAR better-renovated place a couple of doors down. They all have identical sizes and layouts, hence the reason why the "architectural masterpiece" claim is silly, but the owner of the pad I visited – one of Austin's "A-list gays" at the time – hired an A-list architect (one who specializes in historic renovation) and interior designer to revamp it. That was a $4 million project even 20 years ago, but OTOH you need to spend some serious bank to get shit done right.

So: this building was "renovated" over 50 years ago – meaning it was converted into small offices – and then I think a nonprofit of some sort used it as office space (hence the odd remnants like a grand piano and oddly baroque sofa), also adding a commercial kitchen to rent it out as an event space. That was about 20 years ago. But even by Austin real estate measures, which are the highest of any US city between the coasts, $18 million for what in reality would need to be a to-the-studs renovation – in an area that's frankly scary at night – is absurd. I haven't been there recently, but since the road dead-ends nearby, there has – quite literally – not been even ONE successful restaurant, bar or coffee house that lasted more than 3-4 years. Even the Starbucks near there went under FFS! And they had prime corner real estate!

I'll pass and instead spend it on a lovely townhouse in the West Village, thanks. Or maybe West Chelsea.

In the description they state the "Hollywood" bathroom exudes opulence but it looks more like what someone who really likes the movie Scarface would do if they won the lottery.

Complete disaster

R8, that's an insult to "Scarface." (Which, to clarify, I didn't mean as a diss for the Austin place.) Tony's mansion in "Scarface" is early '80s, coke-fueled-Miami perfection. Cold, minimalist, and as white as the suits Tony wears to compensate for not having a white face. He livens up the place when he invites people to say hello to his little friend, however.

Not even interesting enough to be "ugly"...

I heartily disapprove.

It's just ghastly.

The Hollywood bath? Hollywood,Florida?

It looks like retrofitted retail space, especially the entrance. And $18 MILLION? 😅🤑🤪

It's Texas; case closed.

Yuck. I hate the wood cabinetry, it's very 80's. It's just offwhite, blondish wood and black marble everywhere. Depressingly bleak.

The piano shot is very Johnny Guitar!

Terrible. Lots of space and maybe someone who really knows their stuff could do something with it. It's so pedestrian. All that terrible oak grain wood in multiple colors.

Ha! My sides!

It needs a gut reno to be sure.

Did a televangelist own it? It seems Pat Robertson lived there.

Architecturally this is an abomination. So of course it's perfect for Texans with no taste but lots of money.

This is a tear down

It looks like a JCPenney

Augusta National lite

The toilets are crammed into bathroom corners. You could whack your elbows on the vanity counter or the wall. One toilet even blocks cabinet doors. A marvel.

This must've been some big haired Texas frau wife's first attempt at interior design. I recommend a gut renovation.

Who among us doesn't want a conference room in our house?

I want a little room with a fax machine and stuff like at the Holiday Inn.

The outdoor shot looks like some rust belt city where no one is on the street after 5 pm.

[quote]Who among us doesn't want a conference room in our house?

I turned my conference room into a gift wrapping room.

R7

My favorite fancy neighborhood is Pemberton. Yours?

Oh! I did a transaction with Chris Watters. He’s high volume, high dollar, lots of billboards but actually pretty cool.

How “And The Band Played On” of it!

[quote]blend of old-world charm and modern luxury,

Well there are a few bits of old-world charm peeking out here and there. But the "modern luxury" is BAD and the blend is far from seamless. As R6/R21/R28 say it will need a gut reno to uncover the original 1870 character and even then a lot of that will need to be replicated/ rebuilt

And as R7 says its in a shit area. Hard pass at half the price

Why only 8 baths, that's the mystery.

[quote]With a sprawling 10,050 sqft of living and [bold]entertainment[/bold] space spread across the top three floors, the opportunities are truly limitless. As you step inside, you'll find yourself transported to a world of endless [bold]entertainment[/bold] possibilities. The second floor is an [bold]entertainer[/bold]'s dream, boasting an expansive [bold]entertainment[/bold] hall

I wonder if the house is suitable for entertaining.

That is one bizarre house.

R7 West Chelsea is a figment of a broker’s imagination. It’s just Chelsea.

Renovated in 1970 -- and untouched since!

I hate the exposed stone and every finish and design decision in the place. Was this the party pad of the worthless partner son of the founding partner of Austin's leading ambulance chaser law firm? The guy who loved to host parties after the clubs closed?

Is there any landmark regulation or could you tear it down?

Texas state legislature limits Austin landmark protections because FREEDOM!

Does this count as “weird” or not?

r38 - When you kept highligting "entertainment," I wondered if some entrepreneur might turn this into a restaurant/bar/party/dance space. It's the only reason I can see it in any any cheap renovation, but $18M is just BS for such a space, right?

^ Unless Batman lives there, what else would anybody do with that space?

The proportions of the rooms aren't great, but a total re-do could make things better I suppose. This interior comes from the Home Depot school of interior design. Every single thing in the place looks DYI. And the orange color of all that wood... ugh. And $18 mil? No thanks.

Too big, too many bathrooms, too little character.

Might make a good whorehouse.

The cabinetry looks cheap to me. Like home depot grade.

[quote]My favorite fancy neighborhood is Pemberton. Yours?

Excellent choice! I'm more partial to Clarksville, but Pemberton's great.

Also, it sounds like a bit more explanation for others is needed. This building is, quite literally, one of the oldest in the city, and it even predates the Texas Capitol. They don't even have a firm record of most zoning-like subjects prior to 1900. The building definitely predates electricity and indoor plumbing, and I'm guessing running water as well. Prior to WWI it likely housed a wealthy merchant's shop on the lower level – at the time it was the literal center of the city – and either offices or rooming houses of some sort above it. (In less prestigious areas, shop owners typically just lived upstairs from the shop itself.

I truly don't get why the realtor describes it as an "architectural masterpiece," most of all because it's impossible to know what it originally looked like. This building originally looked like the ones on either side of it, which you can see in pic #2 on the Redfin listing. Whoever redid the front facade clearly gave zero fucks about architectural integrity, and may have very well sanded away almost every inch of remaining original character underneath. The original 150-year-old building did not look like *that*! In any event, it'd be bullshit even if the building had decent interiors. I'm not joking when I say the only remaining "architectural character" may remain solely in the stones used to build it originally, assuming they haven't all been replaced.

Finally, while Austin didn't experience white flight to the same extent as most Southern cities, it was definitely impacted by the advent of indoor shopping malls. By 1970 the majority of shops in downtown Austin that were there 20 years prior had vanished due to plummeting visitor numbers. Austin got its first mall in the early '60s, and like most other American downtowns, it quickly devolved into a no-go zone at night. It wasn't particularly dangerous – just depressing. So: what happened was that this formerly "posh" location ended up being in a hipster one, and instead of another jewelry store, they opened one of Austin's most famous music stores: J.R. Reed, one of the go-to places for records starting circa 1965. I only know it because it was the first place in town to offer listening booths and carry the Jimmy Hendrix Experience as well.

[quote] Was this the party pad of the worthless partner son of the founding partner of Austin's leading ambulance chaser law firm? The guy who loved to host parties after the clubs closed?

R41, I think this was before my time. The two main mega-rich gay guys in Austin – among its old-school crowd, not the emerging tech scene – are Ross Moody & Eddie Safady, and Eddie owns the house next door to the one for sale that was VERY nicely done! The Moodys have their hands in half of Texas, but Ross & Eddie are in banking, not law.

[quote]Unless Batman lives there, what else would anybody do with that space?

As the architects of tens of thousands of office conversions (or loft conversions) can tell you, when there's a will, there's a way. The main problem is figuring out how to leave as much visible natural light as possible, and you can usually get that via installing a large skylight over the entire roof (the tricky part is directing the light). If you're arguing no homeowners truly need 14,000 sq ft, I'd agree, but that's not the same as what one could do with the space.

[quote]The proportions of the rooms aren't great, but a total re-do could make things better I suppose. This interior comes from the Home Depot school of interior design. Every single thing in the place looks DYI.

I do know it was taken over by a nearby church after the S&L bust in the '80s, when you could buy properties in downtown Austin for cents on the dollar, for office space, but the current owners aren't known to have done, well, anything with the place. And it's now been a full 25 years. I'm guessing they had plans to redo the place "one day," but one day never got here.