HGTV Fall Thread 2024

The Harrisburg episode of "In With The Old" on Magnolia.....

Cute-ish daddy with deep blue eyes

and

Suspiciously muscular young Amish men.

Which episode was that R1? We just started the new season.

R2

S6/E7 - Old Uptown Revival: The Heart of Harrisburg

I will shout from the rooftops that THE WORST show on HGTV is Fixer to Fabulous - the middle aged Arkansas couple from Bentonville.

Her voice is SO irritating - it sounds like she has a hearing problem, because she vocalizes in a way that sounds like deaf people talking.

But the REAL shitshow is their 'after' - all they do is simple remodeling we've seen a 1000 times and then they put in the most beige/greige/cream landscape of HomeGoods worthy shit.

ZERO design - seriously. Plus they usually do small renovations - a new kitchen (we're going to knock this wall out and make it open concept! Brave!) and bathrooms. The problem is a whole new everything is going to be an improvement, no matter fucking what.

He's a hot daddy - but they're both so thorough unimpressive. The Mississippi couple is 10x better - and they actually know about design periods and produce different designs.

These 2 produce the most standard Home Depot / HomeGoods combinations - it makes my blood boil.

If you edited out R4's name of the show and the names of the hosts, the same could be said for virtually any other HGTV house renovation show.

It comes down to, I think, personal likes and dislikes,of the host(s) and the methods of renovation.

I happen to like Jenny and Dave, but reading R4, I realized how many shows I don't. like for the same reasons R4 listed.

They are all becoming indistinguishable, to a degree, other than personalities. Very rarely do we ever learn anything about renovation or construction. It's all spectacle and reveals.

RIP HGTV

R5 - I have to disagree. Look at their 'afters' in the episodes. It literally looks like an area from a HomeGoods store. And this specific example was for family of theirs.

It's boring - like the least interesting stuff I've ever seen. It's a new low for HGTV - seriously. They're AWFUL.

Example #2:

It's SOOO fucking awful. The window pane with the wreath - the big ass Roman numeral clock, the huge lanterns, the lack of pattern.

Literally stuff you'd walk by in HomeGoods.

I've never seen an HGTV show with the interiors THIS bad.

Most of those shows are little more than product placements for Wayfair or some other basic stuff company. The unique taste of millions.

[quote] Until Mike Holmes Jr shares a photo in a jockstrap...

I think this is as close as you're going to get.

I saw an episode of "Love It Or List It" featuring bickering married gay Toronto cops.

They had a huge collection of boots and the top daddy was clearly a rage queen. But I get he lays some great pipe.

I wanna know if any Toronto DLers see them out and about.

Why is Shea going with Keith and Evan to New Orleans?

They say all real estate is local, so why is a local from Detroit trying to sell real estate in NO.

I'm guessing they had to mix it up with Keith and Evan and they sent them to New Orleans instead of Italy where they sent others. I'm less likely to watch them now that they've sold out. Unless N.O. is one and done. What happened to "We'll never leave Detroit.?"

Through the magic of television, Shea now has a license to sell real estate in Louisiana, I suppose.

I doubt Evan/Keith are doing all the work or that Shea is selling (she's probably licensed only in MI).

But they're going as stars of the show, not actual working people.

This is their version of the Dave and Jenny went to Italy business. Everyone in the last few years has had to have their own little special project on the side made into a short term show and this must be there.

Hmm, that reminds me, haven't seen Dave Marrs and his VPL outline in his jeans for a while.

*this must be theirs.

Yeah, Italy was the place to go,

The Magnolia Network (pitooey) even sent the Maine Cabin Masters to Italy. The Maine Cabin Masters!

(They do have my favorite redneck - Jedi.)

Okay, back to HGTV and Shea's wigs.

Evan and Keith are really doing great work that most of these other 'designers' would totally turn their nose up at.

They are truly renovating communities, saving tear-downs, and providing renovated small affordable homes.

They should be given a fucking medal - those homes are DISASTERS.

Shea's hair is LAIDT!

The Laurel folks and Dave and Jenny in Arkansas may be super straight but they always seem to have the hottest clients pop up.

My pants still get all twitchy when I see the Home Town episode with their friend Shuff. He was a sexy motherfucker. I would take a break from eating Josh's ass to get familiar with all parts of him.

I miss Chase Looney entirely too much. The sheer amount of muscle he put on since leaving the show is amazing.

His biceps in some of the last few Fixer to Fab episodes he was on were massive. Definite JO material.

Still not much new on HGTV.

Watched In With The Old on Max (also on Magnolia) and this guy was pretty hot. He and his wife reno'd a place in Bardstown KY. He has some serious BDF and so did a few of his workers.

Speaking of Dave Marrs...

[bold]Court filings reveal new details in lawsuit against HGTV star’s companies[/bold]

The Bargain Block boys have, in Charles, a really fine General Contractor down in New Orleans.

And they’re really letting their gay flag fly; Evan telling Keith that one of the reasons they like Charles is that he speaks their language (could be) and that Charles "...has a really nice piece of wood…(pause)…in the back of his truck" (Spanish cedar). Keith snickers and does a look.

Found out they are less in New Orleans because they needed a new angle for Bargain Block than it is because they were finding it too difficult to renovate Detroit in the winter.

Evan’s looking good, too. And Keith left the crazy decor in Detroit; the first house in New Orleans was very “normal.”

The show is still more about entertainment than renovation, as are most HGTV shows these days. Won’t stop me from watching them, though.

R23 I was about to come and post the same thing. They were NOT being subtle!

I also had to LOL when Keith said to Evan at one point...."Girl....pick up the pace!"

I'm not generally attracted to younger guys but I will say on Unsellable Houses, Miles (who is the son of one of those screechy bitches, I can't remember which one) is a cute little cub.

(And yes, he's of age and old enough to be working with his mother and to own his own home.)

I don't understand the concept behind "Unsellable Houses."

So these two bitches come in, suggest some improvements to be made, do the work and get paid for it, and I'm supposed to cut them in on the profit action? Fuck that noise.

Yeah, I don't understand how that's legal, R26.

I think it's a concept that's fake for the cameras.

And I wouldn't cut them in for part of the profits - all they do is basic bitch, cheap ass Wayfair shit everywhere.

R26 - what? Yes - because they sell it for over their original listing price.

Let's say a house is listed for 500k and is not selling. They put in 80K in renovations, sell for 650k - they get the 80K back plus half of the differential in house price. It's a good deal for homeowners - actually not such a great deal for the twins when you see how much they get back.

They remodel the bathrooms and kitchen and exteriors - it's not just new furniture. Jesus - not defending them - but the show's been on for 5 years and you haven't grasped the concept yet?

This week's Bargain Block had another racy joke....

When they had to realign a window because it was crooked, Keith segued to a joke about knowing when something is "well hung."

Oh, my! *clutches pearls*

The new season of Windy City Rehab has Alison's new assistant, a young gay named Brett.

He is everything you'd think he'd be - young, sparkly, and a big gurlina. He apparently got hired after sending some cake pops to her as well as his resume - you GO, gurlina!

Been watching a show on Magnolia with Clint Harp - who I think was on Chip and Joanna's show (which I never watched because I hate them).

He is giving serious Josh Hawley vibes. Tonight I watched an episode where he was working on a reno in Akron and he was totally eyefucking the little daddy that was leading the project.

I follow Brett Waterman on FB and according to a recent post he is working on a restoration for the Liberace house in Palm Springs.

Maybe this guy should get his own show (see end segment)

Wow, Evan and Keith are getting more and more risque on every episode.

Evan looks VERY hot in his short shorts on yesterday's episode.

In the last episode, Evan and Keith referred to the period when they were dating, which implies that they are married. I hope they celebrate an anniversary in one of their houses.

In my fantasies, Evan is the quiet but intense top with sizemeat.

But I bet in reality it's Keith, who sounds like a bossy bottom but is probably the top.

Nah, Keith is a bossy bottom 100%, And Evan is the kind of top that likes to be bossed. You can feel their attraction and love for each other through the screen,

By the way, am I the only one who's noticed that Keith's weight is fluctuating in a big way? At the rehearsal for the Mardi Gras dance, he wore a tight black tee that he never would have worn previously. In the old episodes, he wears loose tops and constantly adjusts them so that we don't see that he has a bit of belly. Now, that belly seems to have gone, and his face has become quite gaunt.

That's how I discovered that not every episode is filmed in real-time. They'll do a shot with Evan and Keith talking, and Evan looks slim. In the very next scene, he's back to his old body (which I like).

Yeah, I spend much too much time imagining them having sex...

Oh, I got the names reversed. It's Evan that's losing weight. Sorry.

Did someone say jockstrap?

Keith and Evan are NOT married and neither one of them is in a hurry to get married.

So glad they're not frau-like bridezilla wannabes.

R37 you are not the only one. The weight loss had people speculating (here and on Reddit) that he was either ill or on drugs.

So I watched Unsellable Houses (the screechy twins) this week - season 5 episode 1 "A First House to a Future Sale?"

You have to see it to believe it......the husband was scorching my screen with his FLAMES.

Either he's gay, or that was a trans man. I'm pretty sure he's gay, though.

NOTHING would induce me to watch that show with two harridans.

Is Love It or List It no longer in production? That was my favorite HGTV show.

I also like Chicago Rehab, although she gets on my nerves sometimes.

Windy City Rehab is still active and is in the middle of a new season.

But Love It or List It, I'm not sure. Hilary Farr left after they filmed the last season in 2022 or 2023, so I don't know if they want to continue without her. I think maybe it's done - they have almost 20 seasons of episodes so they can rerun them into perpetuity.

More....

GOTTEN boring and stale? Was she sleepwalking through the fake and repetitive scenarios? Each week's exact same crisis?

Or it could be money.

She also had cancer a few years back - she probably soaked up a few seasons of $$$ and then decided it was time to retire.

Her solo show was very interesting in comparison to LIOLI and less formulaic.

Really - How could anyone tell whether the show was a rerun or not? It's the exact same show every time

There used to be a show where a woman would show what she could do with, I think, $200k. She gave the homeowners a few choices and they would pick one. It seems more realistic than the others.

I think it only lasted one season

I saw a House Hunters in Bordeaux and GLORY BE, Adrian Leeds was the agent. Haven't seen her on any Paris ones in a long time. She was, as always, a delightfully frothy mix of friendliness topped with a splash of cunt!

Have been watching "A Home Away" on Magnolia - it's a married couple in Columbus renovating an old B&B. The husband is a tall light skinned black guy, and while he's a bit quiet and odd sometimes, I kinda think he's hot. He's very tall, has huge hands and feet, and boy, does he have some VPL.

Don't want to disappoint all of her fans, but...

Leeds was the real estate agent for two of my friends (American) that are now expats in France. They don't have a lot of nice things to say about her as an agent or as a person.

Another case of "no one should meet their heroes."

R53 I know HGTV is a performance......she's delightfully cunty on air but yeah, I don't know that I'd want that in a real life situation.

This week's Unsellable Houses had yet another scorchingly nellie husband.

Not quite as flaming as the one from a few weeks ago, but definitely quite light in the loafers nonetheless.

I was watching that today and laughing my ass off! Gurrrlll!

Sorry responding to reply 55 - don't know why it is not showing up anymore.

Sorry must have had you on ignore somehow :)

Unignore me, R58!

I did Alex, I don't want any more trouble from you!!

R60 Hee hee! 😜

But seriously, that nellie husband was clutching his hands together like a big ole gurleena. Is there some sort of Mormon sect in that area where obviously gay men are paired with women? It's just so obvious.

This week's Windy City Rehab - something about a "Brag House" was the title - had a newlywed gay couple.

Neither were big gurleenas as some of the recent husbands posted here were.....but they were kinda Every Gay Professional Couple Of A Certain Age in Chicago.

The reno was kinda nice, I guess.

The twins on Unsellable Houses had a gay couple with a duplex on. The one guy had such a queeny voice - I don't know how you even cultivate that voice unless all your friends in your entire life have been total queens, too.

Yes R63.....one was super queeny. And their house was kinda ugly, too.

Adrian Leeds quoted in this article about the expense of French chateaus.

The Hawaiian guy on Renovation Aloha is really hot.

R66 Agree, though he doesn't always look great in photos....better to see him in action

I'm trying to imagine his dick - do Hawaiians have big dicks or are they more Asian-like? Is he uncut or cut, I wonder?

[quote] Evan and Keith are really doing great work that most of these other 'designers' would totally turn their nose up at. They are truly renovating

And they should stick to renovating and not decorating. When the houses are finished they almost always look like shit because of their pet projects they insist doing.

What about the "Down Home Fab" couple with the chick obsessed with black. Their HOUSE is black, their kitchen is black and if you hire them, you better know you're getting black somewhere. One client insisted no black and her head practically exploded.

I love Evan and Keith, but their show no longer has anything to do with renovation. Its now a situation comedy of sorts, with a B story of doing some shit around the house. It's all about their personalities and interactions. Particularly during the NOLA shows, where they were obviously and outrageously letting their gay flag fly. Was very funny.

But it's no longer a renovation show.

Actually, none of them on HGTV are anymore. But Keith and Evan are nice and funny and kind guys, which can't be said for a lot of those shows and their hosts.

I'm interested in where they're going when they get back to Detroit.

R71 Yes, that changed on HGTV a few years back. Most of these shows could be cut down to a half hour if it was just reno footage. So they have to cram other stuff in there, the B story.

Which is how we get the bits with Evan, Keith and Shea going shopping, or going to the casino, or the xtra-gay stuff they were doing in NOLA.

Or the Screechy Twins teaching their kid how to drive. (Although the one son who just bought his own house.....I mean if they wanted to show his OnlyFans I might not complain.)

Somehow these shows all think we want to see the personal lives of these hosts. Unless it's Dave Marrs and his assistant Chase having a shirtless circle jerk I'm not really interested in hearing about their berry farm.

I can't watch "House Hunters". The women are so picky, they just seem totally First World spoiled. I can't believe how whiny some of them are.

The Zillow Gone Wild host is SOOOOOOOOOO gay - he's kind of annoying.

Jack McBrayer? Yes, we know..

^ Well, THAT landed with a thud.

[quote]Adrian Leeds quoted in this article about the expense of French chateaus

Not an altogether terrible article as they usually are, R65.

Americans tend to do the same thing wrong every time:

--Paying too much for a house and not negotiating

--Buying 30 bedrooms when 12 would be ample - and then coming up with some half-baked scheme whereby the house will pay for itself

--Underestimating the cost of restoration/renovation

--Thinking that there are highly trained local craftsman who can reproduce ancient skills for a kind word and a few coins

--Overestimating the scope of restoration/renovation work. Not every château has to be nor should be completely taken apart at the molecular level and steel reinforced and the stones and millwork freshly cut to look brand spanking new. They never know when to stop and want to leave their own mark, however slick and tasteless.

--Underestimating furnishing and finishing costs (and the time it takes to furnish a huge house)

--Thinking that they can do it themselves

--Thinking that there is a huge untapped market for mindfulness retreats or destination weddings or some fucking loopy thing for a remote house 5.5 hours from Paris

Most buyers go way too far. They could have achieved a beautiful old house that's been made safe and sound and comfortable, instead they insist on putting their stamp on everything. Driven by ego they keep going long after they should have stopped. A 700-year-old château should show some signs of age, not be made over in the style of some tech titan's monstrous new-build on a golf course in Santa Barbara.

They get themselves in over their heads and just keep digging deeper. And it's always Patrimonie's fault and never their own egos. (And those British clowns with the TV show demonstrate that it's not entirely restricted to Americans.)

Thanks R77 very informative.

Ben Napier on Home Town is kind of hot, but he's more fat than fit-fat. I want him to have a bigger rounder butt than he has.

When did this trend of displaying books with the binding facing the wall start? It's so stupid - it makes the designers appear illiterate.

R79 I think he's actually gotten almost too thin.

But his chest is a thing of beauty

[quote] When did this trend of displaying books with the binding facing the wall start? It's so stupid - it makes the designers appear illiterate.

It's not a design element. It's done on HGTV for one reason and one reason only - so HGTV does not have to pay any author or published if their book is seen on screen.

I was watching an old episode of Mexico Life and this episode had a gay couple. I think they were named Jose and Omar. They were moving to Puerto Vallarta.

[quote]When did this trend of displaying books with the binding facing the wall start? It's so stupid - it makes the designers appear illiterate.

Maybe the same time these idiot designers started putting open shelving across kitchen windows so you can't open them or clean them easily.

The Hawaii flippers got into trouble.

I would still let that dude dick me down, though. He definitely has some alpha energy.

Alison on Windy City Rehab had two gays again this week as her clients.

She also has a cute new assistant named Eric who looks a bit like Paul Rudd. Not to be confused with her flaming gurleena assistant Brett.

No HGTV show could ever build something like this. Old-fashioned trades that could no longer exist.

Have been watching a show called Renovation Goldmine. I vaguely knew the business (Megmade) behind the reno couple, they're based in Chicago.

But the husband, Joe, is really pretty cute. In a sort of Seth Meyers way. Nice ass, too.

I'm watching Island Life and in this episode they're in Key West. I'm pretty sure this real estate agent is gay. He has to be. He pings a lot.

This week's Windy City Rehab had a short Latino (I think) cop with the biggest muscle titties I've ever seen.

Can I just add that Mike Holmes, Jr. is totally hot?

R91 Definitely. We've had a few threads with his fine ass as the primary photo.

I'm so burned out on these shows. I still watch Hometown and Restoring Galveston (my birthplace) even though that wife is annoying as fuck. Terrible voice and very loud like she's shouting all the time. I always think of this movie quote.

[quote]Thank you for a memorable afternoon, usually one must go to a bowling alley to meet a woman of your stature.

R93 LOL, what is that quote from!

Ashley Cordray is annoying as fuck. It's worth it to see Michael's hairy legs and that glorious glimpse of his furry chest, though.

This fall has really sucked on HGTV - not a lot of new content, almost no new shows running. I think this must have been when the strike was happening last year.

Hometown is coming back soon, though.

R94

It's from the movie 'Arthur."

John Gielgud (Hobson) says it to Liza Minnelli (Linda Marolla.)

Evan from Bargain Block is looking really skinny in New Orleans. I don't like his new gaunt look.

I never thought Evan had that much of an ass, but he was sure filling out those little blue shorts at Mardi Gras to perfection!

Evan definitely looked different - there was a discussion here about it and also on Reddit. Not sure if it was overwork, meth or an eating disorder.

I'm watching an old episode of Mexico Life and this episode has a gay couple.

I think every third episode of Mexico Life has a gay couple.

Always two 50something queens moving to PV.

R100 These two didn't. It was another city.

The husband on Flipping Impossible is kind of hot, although he has a baby face. Nice arms and torso, not bad butt.