Ellen DeGeneres Jokes About Swapping ‘Be Kind’ Catchphrase for ‘Go F–k Yourselves’

She doesn't get that intent and impact are different things.

This looks about as funny as Roseanne’s last disastrous standup special. It’s incredibly pathetic to pack and audience with your friends and others who were obviously paid by HBO to be there. Like Roseanne, Ellen suffers from a whole host of personality disorders. Joan Rivers is laughing at what happened to her from beyond the grave.

Stunning and brave.

Who?

Alcoholic cunt.

[quote] This looks about as funny as Roseanne’s last disastrous standup special. It’s incredibly pathetic to pack and audience with your friends and others who were obviously paid by HBO to be there. Like Roseanne, Ellen suffers from a whole host of personality disorders. Joan Rivers is laughing at what happened to her from beyond the grave.

There’s a razor-fine line between her and Trump. Two Cluster B disasters addicted to lies, abuse and attention.

Ellen DeGeneres takes chambermaids to an island and she hunts them with a Winchester. She stalks slowly through the jungle smacking on a big league chew.

I thought this was funny.

She needs to dry up and blow away.

Putting "being kind" aside for a moment, Ellen DeGeneres was never funny, and her talk show sucked.

[quote] I ended the show every day by saying, ‘Be kind to one another.’ Had I ended my show by saying, ‘Go fuck yourselves,’

I would have much preferred that.

At least she would have been honest.

She still needs to learn that Be Kind should apply to all the people she interacts with in her life, even the poors.

I don’t hate her, but I don’t care about her. I’m grateful that she took so much heat and pressure when she decided to publicly come out as gay, because she made it easier for gay performers who came after her, but in retrospect that whole kerfuffle was overblown and ridiculous. And so was the ‘revelation’ that she was short-tempered with her staff.

Shocker.

I think Ellen is funny but that trailer has the usual unnecessary shots of the audience laughing.

[quote] According to reports from DeGeneres’ stand-up tour this year, DeGeneres does take some time in the special to own up to being “demanding and impatient and tough.” But she maintained: “I am many things, but I am not mean,”

Potay-to, potah-to.

She was a cunt to Anne Heche when the poor thing was utterly falling apart.

She should talk about how "kind" she was in that circumstance.

And it kinda clashes with the launch of her Leather Lesbian skincare products.

Friends of my worked on her sitcom. She was as terrible as any homophobe out there. A mean, vindictive piece of shit. She has severe psychological issues. Probably borderline and definitely narcissistic. She wasn’t bossy, she was cruel and got immense pleasure out of verbally and psychologically abusing staff. We also know that she did this to a child when she was in her 20s. She’s a really sick person.

[quote] But she maintained: “I am many things, but I am not mean,”

Something Roseanne would say. Totally delusional.

I like her. She's a funny cunt.

Please be kind to her, DL. The stress has me down to like 86 pounds, 3 pounds short of Ellen’s goal weight for me.

R34 is worth the 🚫

R21 is, rather

At least it got her out of the house for a night.

I’ll watch it.

r6 r12 r16 Plausible deniability is the sea she swims in. Her level of whining is 11 out of 10. People are communicating indirectly because of a lacuna in the use of language precision so the use of a vibe of overall self perceived superiority and bitchiness is the method of choice

This does not sound fun or funny, it sounds bitter.

I have not read anything that confirms Ellen is a witch.

Her wanting to appropriate the word KIND is so big business.

Ellen is a real estate mogul in CA and is now headed into the land of online skin care?

Kind Science skin care seems to be potions for leather faced lesbians.

Her skin looks horrible

Her definition of mean is on the money and so apt. She is one mean bitch and she was caught. That really is her epitaph.

I hate the phrase but she truly cannot read the room. Imagine signing off like this, although I doubt she’s truly retiring.

I’ve had enough of

Ellen DeGENERATE

There is a thread on Ellen's skin line but it didn't go far.

[quote] She is one mean bitch and she was caught.

There are so many horror stories out there, that it sounds impossible for her NOT to have gotten caught.

Her skin looks horrible

I think she said her face skin was damaged from the makeup she had to wear on her 1990s sitcom.

Petty, unfunny and rich. Who cares?

People who say things like “be kind” usually aren’t.

Kindness is evident in a person’s actions.

Petty, bitter, unfunny and rich.

Everybody Loves Raymond actor Brad Garrett shared that he knew "more than one" person who was "treated horribly" by the comedian and said that her unsavory behavior was "common knowledge" in the industry.

Lea Thompson doubled down on the sentiments when she said, "true story."

Lea Thompson is one to talk. Such a cunt and was on drugs when I had the misfortune to interact with her in my shop. Her assistant had to apologize for her.

Fuck Ellen, too. So glad I left LA. It’s chock-full of these narcissistic cunts.

Howard the Duck caused many casualties.

The more dirt I find on Ellen, the more I think she’s like the present-day version of Sister George, Beryl Reid’s character, from “The Killing of Sister George” (1968). I wonder if Ellen forces Portia to eat cigar butts when they are home alone.

Ever since she went vegan she's never looked good. Thinner yes but not healthy. As if she is starving.

I think she looked over-treated rather than too thin or anything. All those different products stop working and just make you look like a synthetic human after a while.

Nothing is as heinous as beginning a second career full of goodbye tours

She’s bitter because she was called out for being an asshole and she’s been behaving the way an asshole would.

I have not seen dirt on Ellen. Anywhere.

Hi, Ellen at R47.

Still haven't seen it

The Dakota Johnson interview was a real blunder for Ellen.

Fuck you R45

Be Best.

[Quote]Lea Thompson is one to talk. Such a cunt and was on drugs when I had the misfortune to interact with her in my shop. Her assistant had to apologize for her.

Do go on, R40. I was not expecting drug-addled Lea Thompson tea today, but I'll make time for it.

"Unapologetic, Unrelatable and Totally Insufferable"

True colors.

The Hollywood Reporter

Ugh.

Ellen went to therapy. Was it Oprah again?

The opening of this special is one for the books. So unbelievably narcissistic.

The opening and the entire special is all about how she’s a victim. It’s almost funny it’s so awful.

The problem with the Deadline article is that no one cares that Ellen needed therapy. I worked there for only one year and needed two years of therapy to unwind from the way I was treated, which was to make sure I understood I didn’t matter. I hated the year in that show. I was treated like a dog.

She looks like Henry Gibson.

Narcissistic pity play.

She's the victim. People were unfair to her. People are being mean to her.

See also: tRump, the Harkles.

But you ARE mean, old and gay, Blanche, you ARE mean, old and gay.

She went through tons or staff. Writers and producers were coming and going from the start. Before the scandal. Ellen would actually cry almost daily. Full on tears. Most of the time I learn what kind of mood she was in just on how she entered the room. She was always unhappy about something. I left the show before i lost my mind

New York Times.

I'm tired of this cunt.

I'm 10 minutes into the special, and her heart's just not in it. Low energy, going through the motions, sort of melancholy. She hasn't even started whining yet, so there's that to look forward to. Bye bitch!

[quote] Ellen would actually cry almost daily. Full on tears. Most of the time I learn what kind of mood she was in just on how she entered the room. She was always unhappy about something.

I believe they call it "lesbian drama."

MeToo had its moments, but set us back a decade when dealing with these psychos. Can't call cunts like Ellen and Lively "difficult" anymore because that's considered misogynistic language now, even though that's exactly what they are. Never mind all the crew members suffering under them, gotta look out for the millionaire stars first and foremost instead.

She mostly talked about raising chickens during her cancellation. “They lay an egg every day, and as someone who once hosted a daily talk show, I can really appreciate that,” Ellen said to a crowd who seemed to eat the observation up.

“I’m sure they’re thinking: ‘I just laid an egg. I don’t think I can do that again tomorrow.’ And yet, they do.”

I feel like with Ellen, her being in the public eye for so long as one of the first out and proud celebrity lesbians contributed to her bad attitude. Think about it, lesbians love eating pussy and Ellen probably felt like she had to assume the role of a cunt because she was *the* most famous carpet-muncher in Hollywood. There was a huge amount of pressure on her to be the family-friendly dyke that the general public could be at ease with. Add to that the years of chowing down on Portia de Rossi's muff going to her head and you get yourself a person who is a genuine asshole.

R53 Just saw your response!

Well…I had a shop in DTLA and we’d get the occasional celeb in and we treated them like everyone else. We always tried to be friendly and kind and then leave them alone to shop. One day, a crazy rude bitch comes in (DTLA has plenty of these) and just seemed exasperated to even be alive. Huffing and sighing loudly and going through the racks of clothes like she was mad at them. It was so bizarre. Muttering under her breath, dropping clothes on the floor. I’m not saying she was on meth but I’ve seen plenty of methheads and that’s what they look like. The woman with her chatted us up and was super friendly. Nasty cunt lady abruptly left, didn’t acknowledge us when we said have a nice day, and if she’d turned right and headed to Skid Row, I wouldn’t have been a bit surprised. Woman with her apologized for crazy friend’s behavior and left. Looked at hubby after they’d gone and we both said “That was Lea Fucking Thompson!” We’ve had some fun celebs in (Jennifer Coolidge forever the best!), quiet but nice ones (believe it or not Miley Cyrus was quiet and professional), and a bit rude ones (Tracee Ellis-Ross) but not that big a deal but no one was cuntier or nasty as Lea Fucking Thompson. We’ve relocated to another city and couldn’t be happier. We’ve only had two celebs in since the move but both friendly. Tessa Thompson and Sofia Coppola…cuz I know you wondered. :)

She recalls reading a headline declaring that she is the "most hated person in America," she quips, "It's a horrible thing to say about somebody, and to make it worse, there was no trophy, no awards banquet. Nothing."

[quote]"It's a horrible thing to say about somebody, and to make it worse, there was no trophy, no awards banquet. Nothing."

Sounds like something a DLer would say.

There is an enormous difference between being exacting and demanding as a boss and ridiculous things like not allowing people to talk to you directly or make eye contact or any of dozens of other stories about her attacking people personally, not just over the quality of their work.

A few years ago, I once worked with a guy from another country where deodorant was not in common usage. Rather than embarrassing him in front of the rest of the staff, I spoke to one of his friends who was from the same country, but had been working with us in the US for a few years, and asked him to have a "how are you acclimating to moving to the US" conversation with him. The next time I saw the guy, he was clearly wearing deodorant.

I always felt Ellen was the wrong fit for a talk show. She's a different animal to someone like Oprah who loves attention. Comics are anti-social people which is what allows them to observe and comment on others. Ellen said it was the greatest job in the world but making a daily show is a grind and I assume they shot more than one a day. I can see how that would soon become feeling like a trap, no matter how much you were being paid. I'm surprised she lasted as long as she did. Doing her sitcoms and stand-up were better arenas for her.

THIS is how she chooses to close out her career? THIS crappy, angry, victim-fest. I watched the show and truly tried to enter it with a generous heart. But, my god! The only talent she demonstrates in this special is a unique ability to blame others for her bad behavior and extraordinary skills at humble bragging. It wasn't even fun hate watching.

What's extraordinary is that she decided that THIS was what she wanted for her swan song. And in some ways I admire it because she feels free to show her true self: a very angry, cold, self-pitying, unrepentant, entitled asshole.

When Ellen tells you in a skincare video that she's in Rwanda to see the gorillas and everyone watching should go, too, she is sticking it to people who will never have the money to go there. And yet she wants them to throw out money on her skincare line.

it sounds like the special, which I was going to watch before the reviews came out, will be one more thing she's angry about. These people just can't leave the stage. They're angry because the world doesn't love them anymore..

[quote] I feel like with Ellen, her being in the public eye for so long as one of the first out and proud celebrity lesbians contributed to her bad attitude. Think about it, lesbians love eating pussy and Ellen probably felt like she had to assume the role of a cunt because she was *the* most famous carpet-muncher in Hollywood. There was a huge amount of pressure on her to be the family-friendly dyke that the general public could be at ease with. Add to that the years of chowing down on Portia de Rossi's muff going to her head and you get yourself a person who is a genuine asshole.

So you're saying the entire universe comes down in the end to pussy.

Thanks, Melania, for weighing in with such profound thoughts.

r79 you are velcome

Ungrateful bitch! but her skin really does glows.

An alcoholic who smoked like a chimney for decades has a skin care line. You can't make this shit up.

I looked at the skincare line. When you try the sample kit, you obligate yourself to receiving them every two months. Supposedly, it's very difficiult to cancel. So, you're paying 600. a year and not getting full sizes.

She views people who buy her stuff as suckers.

Well no forgiveness on this thread. Phew. I was never a fan. Her ironic kind of passive self regard always turned me off a bit. I never watched her chat show- just wasn’t interested in her. Where there is smoke there’s fire so I’m sure much of the nasty chatter around her are at least half true. But who knows?

Wanda Sykes is so much funnier- And Joan Rivers was one for the ages in the world of humor.

Ellen made light of the seriousness of the allegations by telling a joke about "a game of tag in 2016," that she played with her staff.

"I would chase [employees] all over the studio, I would scare them because I loved to do that," she said. "You know, hearing myself say this out loud … I was chasing my employees and terrorising them … I can see how that would be misinterpreted."

Numerous people gave first hand accounts of how awful she was and now she's playing the "poor me" victim. STFU you nasty cunt.

I thought it was just me. My lesbian roommate thought she was thing since sliced bread @R10

Interesting how many female comics of the 80s were lesbians or allegedly asexual.

Interesting how many female comics of the 80s just sucked. Ellen was funny, but there was that whole slew of "am I right ladies?" stand up that was just awful, i.e. Elaine Boosler, Rita Ruder and a bunch of others.

Molly Shannon did a funny parody of those types with her Jeannie Darcy character on SNL.

I think she really believes it. She showed up every day to a screaming bunch of loving fans, played games, gave out free shit, sometimes had half-naked men for the straight, sex-deprived SAHMs at home, etc. How could someone like that not be considered nice? And all the demands on her staff were just "high standards" and things to keep her in the best mood possible to make the show as good as possible.

She's wrong, but I think she really believes it.

R89 Don’t EVEN get me started.

I had a bra fitting the other day, and I HAD a fit!

Am I right, lady friends?

Ellen DeGeneres Reveals She Has Osteoporosis, OCD and ADHD

She’s just like Trump, can’t take any sort of criticism, misses being in the spotlight, and not enjoying the narrative being absolutely ripped away from her stubby, vulgarian fingers. Her type of willowy, self deprecating 90’s humor evaporated when Hannah Einbinder and the writers from Hacks wrested it away from her several years ago.

Ellen is not relatable anymore, an uber wealthy dictator that cannot and will not relate to the little people. The harder she tries, the worse she fails.

I call it the “Mary J Blige Syndrome”- Now that you’ve overcome heartbreak, sorrow and tears after you’ve make your first ten million, what the fuck do you sing about that anyone wants to hear?

I KNEW Lea Thompson was a bitch!! I saw a YouTube video of her arriving to one of those lame events where old, washed up celebrities sign autographs for money. A bunch of fans were waiting outside the venue trying to say hi to her and she just stormed right past them as if they didn't even exist. Zero acknowledgement. I knew right then I hated her!

[quote]The problem with the Deadline article is that no one cares that Ellen needed therapy. I worked there for only one year and needed two years of therapy to unwind from the way I was treated, which was to make sure I understood I didn’t matter. I hated the year in that show. I was treated like a dog.

Ellen loves dogs!

[quote]THIS is how she chooses to close out her career? THIS crappy, angry, victim-fest. I watched the show and truly tried to enter it with a generous heart. But, my god! The only talent she demonstrates in this special is a unique ability to blame others for her bad behavior and extraordinary skills at humble bragging. It wasn't even fun hate watching

Ellen said herself in the Netflix special that she was doing the "comeback/farewell" show because *she* wanted to have the last word! So this is her having the last word.

"Okay--NOW I'm done!" Mic drop.

Osteoporosis-OCD-ADHD Welcome to the club CUNT! Hope this MAGA bitch dies.

Mark Harris talked about how she always complains about being kicked out of show business. When she was launching her talk show, she said she had basically been blacklisted for coming out as gay. But in those 5 years between her ABC sitcom ending and her talk show, she had a one season sitcom on CBS with Cloris Leachman, did 2 HBO specials, Finding Nemo and hosted the Emmys right after 9/11.

Ellen is not relatable anymore

Relatable is the name of her previous concert special. I just watched it. She mentions the trap of being known as the be kind lady. There is a funny bit about buying new shoes. She also mentions that she is no longer vegan and her body looks a bit heavier.

I also watched her stage interview with Dave Letterman which was shot while Ellen was still doing her chat show. It includes footage of Ellen giving Dave a tour of her Warners offices. She does the scaring people bit there too.

One in three women has osteoporosis. Excessive alcohol consumption increases the likelihood of contracting it. For her to think it would attract sympathy is unbelievable. She can afford 100 years worth of Boniva treatments.

Ellen's always been a drinker.

I heard she was going open for Kevin Sessums, but they closed the Pret A Manger early that day.

“She made millions of dollars doing a Netflix special talking about how she got canceled, but by nature of making millions of dollars to do a Netflix special, you were not silenced,” one former staffer says. “You were not kicked out of Hollywood. Most people can’t get Netflix specials.”

I’ve only seen her truly happy on that game show where she got to push buttons and pull leavers that made people fall, have something thrown at them, or pushed around like a pinball.

It's funny cos it's not happening to me!

The cruelty she engaged in on that show and her own convinced me she was disturbed and angry.

She had me fired as her best friend

- Holly Fulger.

What R105 and R107 said.

Farewell, asshole.

Stay gone.

Just saw another "Kind Science" commercial. If she was serious about this venture, she would have chosen a different name for the brand and made Portia the spokesperson. This brand evidences no kindness (an adhesion contract for six kits a year) and no particular science.

Bitch is worth 370+ million-Not enough for her.Bitch will never be happy and we get to watch.

EXACTLY, r104. The fucking audacity of this bitch, claiming she's cancelled.

I saw Ozemprah in the audience too, trying to be low key. Clearly this cunt has the approval of the California elites because they're just like each other; she doesn't care about anything else. All those dumb white bitches in the audience too (her core show audience) can go fuck themselves.

Ellen DeGeneres’ wild lucrative real estate side hustle

But what the Daytime Emmy-winner doesn’t speak about in the comedy special is her very lucrative side hustle: real estate.

According to Realtor, the “EDtv” actress has been snapping up home after home and selling them off just as quickly.

Over the years, she and her wife, de Rossi, have earned themselves a respectable real estate portfolio in California and beyond, and have flipped and sold many of the homes for a massive profit.

Is it too late to trade Gavin Creel for this asshole?

A former writer recalled feeling anxious because of DeGeneres' pranks, which occasionally included scaring the staff. "I would have nightmares for years that she was chasing me," they revealed.