Inside Ben Platt and Noah Gavin's wedding

Nepo baby fag!

Where's bestie Beanie?

How about those fingernails on the guys?

Fancy!

They’re both so ugly! I guess they’re well suited.

Soft, small, tapered-fingered lady hands painted all up for the big day.

I hope Ben waxed his back for the occasion.

They look like goons.

Bestie Beanie is definitely there in the group pic.

Why wasn't his "mentor" Cynthia Erivo there?

Suck it, Garrett Clayton!

That David Rose suit shows these krazy kids are gonna make it and the fun-size groom shows Ben will always be the big spoon.

I hope they’re genuinely happy but the cynic in me suspects their relationship will end in tears

Cynthia Erivo was there with her wife Lena Waithe.

[quote]Yes, we did have royalty at the wedding. The love that Cynthia Erivo and Lena Waithe share is our north star. So is their style.” —Ben

Well, they *just* made it under the wire for wearing white after Labor Day!

Toilet paper cozies are appropriate any time of year, regardless of color.

I’d be so nervous about misgendering anyone at that party.

Gross, they look like a Moody Blues album cover from 1973.

I know it's your wedding, and your magical princess fantasy but french tips? Really?

Of course they’re the kind of gay guys who are only friends with plain, chubby girls.

R14 - Beverly Sutphin

Those nails are painfully pretentious.

Too much facial hair everywhere, and no attempt at haircuts either, not just a little clean up?

They both look vaguely like FTM cases.

They wore cream, not white.

Well, they *just* made it under the wire for wearing white after Labor Day!

They’ll divorce because of irreconcilable differences, both want to sing the Olivia Newton John part of ‘You’re the one that want” at karaoke.

Clearly neither one of these are tops.

Daddy Platt must've written quite a large check to cover that extravaganza.

Ben Platt looks like an accountant in Scarsdale. Which he probably would be if not for his father.

And then my favorite culinary mind, Claire Saffitz, showed up, fed me a cake, and I blacked out. When I woke up...

I had kidney missing.

Very jealous that they had a private MUNA concert.

R21: "Those nails are painfully pretentious."

But not as pretentious as this: "Noah went for a cream set inspired by 1950s French workwear..."

I love, love, love Cynthia and Lena's coordinated outfits, though.

[quote] they look like a Moody Blues album cover from 1973.

R17 - 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I'm just glad they took themselves off the market together rather than inflicting their drama on two innocent people.

Poor Ben...Marrying someone whose hole pics were probably seen by most of the people in the audience must not be fun.

Just a couple of grooms getting married in ladies' pantsuits.

Apparently Bryan Singer jumped out of the cake and viciously slapped Noah Galvin in front of the guests!

[quote]“Led by my brother Henry, my siblings performed a medley of Sondheim songs rewritten to be about me and Noah. It ended with my favorite musical, Sunday in the Park With George. Hence, I’m sobbing in his arms.”

I'm sure Sondheim would've been sobbing as well...

Quite funny that both Noah and Ben have brothers who are much more attractive than them.

Also, I don't quite get how Ben goes to such lengths for his clothes, etc, and then does nothing to make his hair and beard look even remotely neat.

The drama dorks I’ve known seem to prefer the post-dishabille “I threw this on backstage after pulling a train of union workers!”

They'll be consummating their union on a pay-per-view from Carnegie Hall.

I hear Barbra’s team was hired for principal photography, R39. Those tight&curlies will be bathed in candle light and they will glisten.

I distinctly remember seeing Noah plowing Ben through a mirror in a video posted here over the last 18 months, making him inexplicably the top.

Am I dreaming (it would be a nightmare, actually)?

Noah topping? Yes, you're dreaming.

There is a video out there of Noah getting fucked by someone (not Ben) and it's recorded via a mirror, perhaps that's what you're thinking of?

R15=Iola Lucille Boylen

Who gets the fatter end of the double-headed dildo??? Inquiring minds want to know!

[quote] I’d be so nervous about misgendering anyone at that party.

I counted 7 or 8 trans people, but I could be wrong.

Who is that hussy in pink showing leg?

R46, Noah Galvin's brother.

[quote] I counted 7 or 8 trans people, but I could be wrong.

Yeah, I think that's right.

I circled them in red.

Neither looks like they shower regularly and both probably have scrotum cheese. Congrats to the happy couple!

Speaking of Lenas, is that Lens in pink by Beanie?

Mazel tov to the wedding belles. How many north stars can one couple have?

I saw them walking their dog in Prospect Park in May or June. I was really taken aback, never expecting to see them there. They were dressed and acting like two typical gay guys out walking their dog in Prospect Park on a weekday afternoon, nothing flamboyant or fem at all. I wish them well.

Get 'em, girls!

Such masculine energy here.

Don't forget this prenup, son!

Noah shows pole and hole.

Very nice for them.

But the long, manicured fingernails are disgusting.

R19 NAILS it.

Thanks, r42. You're right, and I guess I thought it was Noah... and of course the topping order made NO sense the way I remembered it. Besides, 4 in the air get you nowhere.

Haha R56.

Poor Noah's used up hole looks like hamburger!!

That thing has been run through the meat grinder.

Or should I say, Meat Grindr?

Those aren't French tip nails. These are:

The tips are a different color, usually white.

Noah Galvin abandoned his father's Catholic / Irish and Italian ancestry.

They’re still boring.

I saw the other day when this was announced, some bitter hookup Noah had uploaded his entire Grindr private folder to the r/celebritypenis subreddit. It was pulled a few hours later.

I actually stand corrected, it’s still there. Oops!

r64 Those have been around for years, since early 2019.

These two are endlessly nauseating.

81 (eightyone) boring amateurish wedding snaps in Vogue?

Overbearing Heebs

Will the divorce get this much press coverage?

Only if Daddy Platt pays for it.

Did brother Jonah sing?

This looks like the poster to a Hobbit sequel.

^^Where the Hobbits present hole.

Their shower drain must be constantly clogged with body hair.

And cum.

And Santorum.

R48 You missed the woman on the far left in the green floral number.

“Musical theater singalongs.” I bet tunes from Dear Evan Hansen were front and center.

r75 Optimistic to suggest they shower regularly

Wait - WHAT? Cynthia Erivo is married to Lena?

R79, Ben is so vapid, pretentious and full of himself, I can imagine him taking a position that he doesn’t sing those songs anymore.

I'm sure the wedding party enjoyed Ben singing Judy Garland's entire catalog for 12 hours straight. Not even an unlimited open bar would be enough to endure that sort of torture.

Nonsense. He’d sing material of his own albums. He can’t stop the self-promotion.

I find their lack of self-awareness oddly refreshing. They’re immune to scrutiny, and for that, I envy them.

He paid orchestra and lighting fees for the consummation. Amazing how one strawberry-shaped turd can steal focus.

Matchy matchy

[quote] Not even an unlimited open bar would be enough to endure that sort of torture.

How about a baked potato bar?

I've never read a more nauseating article in my life.

How short is Noah if Ben is 5'9" on a good day? He towers over him.

Cynthia Erivo eats at the Y? I had no idea.

After looking at these pics, I may start myself! PUKE

Damn, Cynthia and Lena make a HOT couple. Good for them.

To counterbalance the kind words with snark: Ben in the photo posted by R19 looks like he was born blind.

As creepy as any wedding photos out there.

Vulgar, showy asses.

Isn't it all a bit much?

“The DL fave finally ties the knot.”

Way to get my hopes up, OP. I thought you meant he’d hanged himself.

Boy, when R53 said to "Get 'em, girls!" you bitches went for the jugular!

No one but no one wants to see this mess! I've been around the two of them in person on more than one occasion and the words insufferable, obnoxious and self important barely scratch the surface. Not to mention fashion victims of the highest degree! Just go away!

Noah gives me Elliott Page vibes.

I was there and took a drink of champagne every time the word queer was said.

Jonah's singing is as self-indulgent as Ben's.

[quote] I was there and took a drink of champagne every time the word queer was said.

Poor thing.

You must have been passed out after only an hour.

Among other events, I was at the New Dramatist Awards with these creatures at the Marriott Marquis here in NY. During one of the breaks of that four hour masturbatory event, miss Noah took herself to the restroom. I was in the lobby outside the ballroom on a call and will never forget seeing her sashay to the restroom in her gigantic skirt and heels. Could not contain my laughter.

You lost me at "Inside Ben Platt".

Is Beanie standing next to the dyke in pink and glasses? If so, it looks like she's lost weight.

Scoping the barrel of the bottoms

You all know damn well these two queens are seeing this thread via their PR hoes. I'd love to be a fly on the wall for the tears lol.

[Quote] … At this point, our souls left our bodies and we have yet to return… - Ben P.

MARY!

In the wedding photo, where are the people of color?

Where is the differently abled person in a wheelchair?

Where are the bejeweled walking sticks?

Are they really tempting being canceled on their wedding day?

Ben Platt and Noah Galvin don't like "the blacks."

They don't have any friends of that color.

Taking bets on when they will divorce.

Elphaba's a DYKE?!

This must've cost Daddy Platt a fortune.

I wonder if he knows everybody's seen his new son-in-law's asshole on the internet.

[quote]Is Beanie standing next to the dyke in pink and glasses?

Yes, that's her wife.

R113. I haven't. Where is it?

Dick

Asshole

Here's the whole thread

R117. Yeesh. Looks like an easy entry for Platt.

Will their union fall victim to the Vogue Wedding Curse?

If you can fit 2 fingers in shame on you, if you can fit five shame on me!

It's just like when the previous Queen of Broadway, Ethel Merman, got married to Ernest Borgnine!

I hope Beanie serenaded the newlyweds with "His Love Makes Me Beautiful."

R123. And then was replaced by Lea Michele.

[quote] I hope Beanie serenaded the newlyweds with "His Love Makes Me Beautiful."

Are you kidding? We got Lea Michele!

Gayer than Matt Damon holding his “wife’s” clutch purse at the Tony Awards.

I'd much rather see Ben's schlong.