Let’s be European tourists in the US

I'm the aural adjustment upon initial contact with LOUD Americans.

How about keeping your nasty European trashy selves at home, you might injest some toxic, but you don't care, as long as you can come to the promised land, you love it, stay home.

Ingest actually.

I'm San Francisco, one of their favorite cities!

I'm the gaggle of off-duty KLM flight attendants running around the Bloomingdale's Outlet or Woodbury Common, loudly converting all the prices to euros (and loving the weak dollar)

Our darkies know their place..

I'm the German tourists witnessing a robbery in NYC, and foolishly deciding to intervene.

[quote] I'm San Francisco, one of their favorite cities!

I've noticed that too.

Is there an explanation for it?

R8 SF reminds them of postwar Berlin

I’m the French, berating the hotel staff.

I'm the Dutch, completely blending in because we speak perfect English.

R8, it share some aspects of some Euro cities -- walkable, a cafe culture, about as much history as a California city can have, etc.

I’m Dutchie and I am beyond annoyed with the overly chatty cashiers.

Especially at this Trader Joe chain.

Does one really need to explain why tourists visit SF?

I'm the inexplicable attachment to the dream of renting Harley-Davidsons and driving Route 66 into the real America

(How many otherwise well travelled and intelligent European friends have I tried to dissuade of this very bad idea?)

I’m dipping my fries (chips) in mayonnaise instead of ketchup.

[quote] I’m dipping my fries (chips) in mayonnaise instead of ketchup.

Oh, please.

Americans use mayo, ranch, thousand island (aka "fry sauce"), and lots of other condiments for their french fries.

Ketchup is so last century.

“We’re going to see LA, Phoenix and Vegas all in one weekend! I can’t wait!”

I'm the German couple kitted out for a multi-day mountain hike in the middle of Manhattan.

I'm the disappointment when they visit LA. This is [italic]not[/italic] a tourist-friendly type of town on the level of SF, NYC, Miami, DC.

I'm the complete disappointment.

I feel like they should wait and not come here right now. We are too fucked up. Things are just so shitty and it feels like we need more notice to get ready for company.

I'm the German tourists headed to Death Valley in the dead of 120 F+ summer. No, really. This is an actual thing.

[quote] I'm the German tourists headed to Death Valley in the dead of 120 F+ summer. No, really. This is an actual thing.

Wearing Winter coats, no less.

I’m complaining to waiters about having to tip and to retail workers about sales tax.

I'm the availability of dispensaries, legal weed, and better drugs. My eyes are as open as a kid in a candy store!

I'm the look of shock at the table manners of the average American - adults holding their cutlery like five year olds!

I'm in the line for a ride at Disneyland - shocked that people get to jump to the front because they are morbidly obese and riding a mobility scooter. Accompanied by their extended family.

I'm the shock that nobody speaks 5 languages like we do.

Eurotrash

I’m being a cunt

As an American that spends a great deal of time in Europe, I don't see the attraction of American cities. Doesn't seem worth the travel time and expense. The one thing the US does well is national parks. If that what you are into, the US is worth the trip.

I am the incredibly fat, lobster-red German tourist wearing a Speedo and sauntering down AIA in Ft. Lauderdale. The locals pray for a shark attack.

"The water is safe, just a shadow caused by the sun." "It's not moving; the waves just make it seem that way." "Be sure to splash around and get the water all over you."

"Helga, don't worry about Heinrich, I'm sure he's fine." "That's a lovely string bikini."

I'm the suitcase full of cheap over the counter drugs in bulk quantities.

[quote] don't see the attraction of American cities.

Agreed. But on the flip side of that, our nature is 100 x better than theirs.

I’m the NY Yankees cap.

I'm the fact that they are no better dressed than their counterparts from any other country and usually no less fat.

I’m surprised at the insecurity when dealing with foreigners - what happened to the American Exceptionalism?

I’m the 5kg weight increase from two weeks of American food.

I'm the 50kg weight from affordable Marijuana!!!!

I'm thick white socks with shit-brown sandals.

I'm the odd fact that the Germans, the British and the Russians are always immediately noticeable but not so the Spanish, the Italians or the French.

[quote]I’m complaining to waiters about having to tip and to retail workers about sales tax.

Euros are simply used to the sales tax (VAT) always being included in the price. It throws them off.

BTW American tipping culture has, to some extent, been adopted in parts of Europe. Point-of-sale terminals in Ireland and the Netherlands, for example, now often have options for tipping 5%, 10%, 15% or 20% (often just for the service of having a salesperson open a fridge and hand you a bottle). Many (if not most) customers ignore those buttons, though.

I'm the Amazon locker full of bargains.

Haha, r5. When I visited NYC from Europe last month we stayed at the hotel where it seems KLM puts up all its flight crew. You can imagine the affairs that happen.

I'm the German (or Swiss or Dutch) tourist shocked at how decrepit and antiquated all the infrastructure is.

I'm the European that will one day understand that being polite, friendly and "chatty" acts like social glue in a very diverse society.

I flew with United, and was shocked by how fat, out of shape, ugly and generally not suitable-looking for the job the flight attendants were. Also old. Not the kind of people you'd have confidence in to guide you out of an emergency or to respond in an agile and rapid manner. They also weren't particularly friendly and welcoming nor did they make much of an effort to make passengers feel comfortable.

I'm the European who is a seasoned US traveler. I'm his sticker shock on a recent visit because everything is NOT cheaper in the USA. WTF happened? Why is dinner in Beacon NY more expensive than Brussels? Why is a rent higher in Denver than Zurich?

R36 almost always those aren’t actual Yankees caps. Every two-bit tourist trap store in NYC sells the same generic cap with lettering that just mimics the team logo (or a Mets-adjacent logo). Yankees caps don’t actual come in a rainbow of colors.

I am the foreskins. I cause alarm in the men’s room at TGI Friday’s or Applebee’s when the locals think I’m stroking off at the urinal instead of just trying to keep my cock clean.

Sometimes not alarm but disappointment, R50.

R48, because of all of the economic factors of the past fifteen years, bunky

Hard to imagine feeling unwelcome by people you dismiss as fat, out of shape, ugly and generally not suitable-looking for the job.

United Airlines flight attendants can be rude, dismissive ,and ignorant. One is used to this on US domestic flights but it really shows on international flights.

I'm the mistaken assumption that there will be adequate public transportation in many parts of the US.

[quote]I'm the European that will one day understand that being polite, friendly and "chatty" acts like social glue in a very diverse society.

Indeed. R46. [bold]Acting[/bold] bubbly and effusive and friendly has certainly bound the US together very nicely and smoothed out and harmonized that "very diverse culture."

Do you not think even fleetingly before writing? - just turn on the tap of pablum from a Civics class decades ago?

Well, ever since that throw down, it's on!

In the unusually harsh and vulgar swear words that surprise and offend Americans. A word like “cunt” or “wichser“ which r56 must hear often.

R36, R49 is correct. Buy your lids in Macy's. The Herald Square store has a nice selection of official, well made lids with accompanying teams (of all sports) clothing. They're not cheap, but the stuff will last for years.

R53, I wasn't rude in the slightest to the United Airlines flight attendants. In fact, my interaction with them was the bare minimum, because they didn't engage much with the passengers - even when throwing the food down - and this was a transatlantic flight. Fat, out of shape, ugly and generally not suitable-looking for the job is an objective description of them.

They for sure didn't look anything like in the photo at link (except like the large lady on the end, but she looks groomed, which none of them on my flights were).

They looked more like this guy, except they didn't fit into the aisles as well, their hair was flying around or greasy and they looked generally grubby.

Also, they were about 25 years older than the large lady at the end.

I’m the disdain for the tipping culture. Pay your staff adequately.

R46 believe me, us Germans won't notice. German infrastructure has been sold out for decades.

I’m the sheer horror when the bill is dropped on the table mid-second-bite of my main, with the passive-aggressive, “I’ll get that whenever you’re ready, no rush!” It most certainly is a rush.

I'm shaking my head in disbelief when I hear your stories about collection calls, wage garnishments , 'payment plans' , bankruptcy filing, all over medical debt. WTF?

[quote] Route 66 into the real America

[quote](How many otherwise well travelled and intelligent European friends have I tried to dissuade of this very bad idea?)

I've done road trips on Route 66 several times and it's a lot of fun. Some of you prisspots need to unclench and get out more.

"You have to pay for an ambulance in an emergency? How much?! That's impossible."

I'm this fat American telling tourists what NOT to do in america.

I'm getting my first look at the Grand Canyon.

We went to Buc-ee's.