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JD Vance, an Unlikely Friendship and Why It Ended

When his book, “Hillbilly Elegy,” was published in 2016, JD Vance sent an email apologizing to a close friend from his Yale Law School days. The friend identified as transgender, but Vance referred to them in the book as a lesbian.

“Hey Sofes, here’s an excerpt from my book,” Vance wrote to his friend, Sofia Nelson. “I send this to you not just to brag, but because I’m sure if you read it you’ll notice reference to ‘an extremely progressive lesbian.’”

“I recognize now that this may not accurately reflect how you think of yourself, and for that I am really sorry,” he wrote. “I hope you’re not offended, but if you are, I’m sorry! Love you, JD.”

Nelson wrote back the same day, calling Vance “buddy” and thanking him for “being sweet,” adding, “If you had written gender queer radical pragmatist, nobody would know what you mean.” Nelson asked for an autographed copy, then signed off with, “Love, Sofia.”

That exchange is from a series of emails between two friends, part of a close-knit group of 16 students who remained together throughout their first law school semester in the fall of 2010. As now-Sen. Vance seeks the vice presidency, Nelson has shared about 90 of their emails and text messages, primarily from 2014 through 2017, with The New York Times.

The emails, in which Vance criticizes former President Donald Trump both for “racism” and as a “morally reprehensible human being,” add to an existing body of evidence showing Vance’s ideological pivot from Never Trumper to Trump’s running mate.

And they reflect a young man quite different from the hard-right culture warrior of today who back then brought homemade baked goods to his friend after Nelson underwent transition-related surgery. The visit cemented their bond.

“The content of the conversation was,” Nelson said in an interview with the Times, “‘I don’t understand what you’re doing, but I support you.’ And that meant a lot to me at the time, because I think that was the foundation of our friendship.”

The political views of the two were sharply divergent, but their friendship would continue for a decade, strengthened by their shared Midwestern roots — Nelson grew up in western Michigan and Vance in Ohio — and cynical views of Ivy League elitism.

Nelson, a Tufts University graduate, had received a prestigious Truman scholarship for law school, indicating a desire to work in public service.

At times, they exchanged messages infrequently. At other times, they would have energetic back-and-forths several times a week. And their talks reflected the history playing out around them — protests against police violence in Ferguson, Missouri, the massacre of Black churchgoers in Charleston, South Carolina, and the 2016 campaign between Trump and Hillary Clinton. Their conversations were notable not only for Vance’s harsh comments about Trump, but also for the tenderness and thoughtful tone in the messages.

They provide what may be a textbook example of respectful discourse, revealing a cultural willingness by Vance to accept Nelson’s gender identity, which sharply differs from the anti-LGBTQ+ sentiments evident at the Republican National Convention.

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by Anonymousreply 2July 29, 2024 8:21 PM

Nelson, now a public defender in Detroit, said they visited each other’s homes, talked on Zoom during the pandemic and exchanged long emails discussing a range of subjects, from the minutiae of daily life to weighty discussions of current events and public policy issues. Nelson attended Vance’s wedding in Kentucky in 2014. They pondered doing a podcast together — he suggested they call it “The Lunatic Fringe.”

But Nelson and Vance had a falling out in 2021, when Vance said publicly he supported an Arkansas ban on gender-affirming care for minors, leading to a bitter exchange that deeply hurt Nelson.

“He achieved great success and became very rich by being a Never Trumper who explained the white working class to the liberal elite,” Nelson said, referring to Vance’s successful 2016 book. “Now he’s amassing even more power by expressing the exact opposite.”

Now, Nelson, who opposes the Trump/Vance ticket, hopes the emails inform the opinion of voters about Vance.

by Anonymousreply 1July 29, 2024 8:10 PM

Mein tranny Fuhrer.

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by Anonymousreply 2July 29, 2024 8:21 PM
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