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I’ve Been On 11 Gay Cruises 🚢 Since 2009

I haven’t gotten laid on ANY of them.

Datalounge people- What is wrong with me?

by Anonymousreply 78July 31, 2024 3:58 AM

You need to get in the group chats.

by Anonymousreply 1July 24, 2024 12:53 PM

You're not a whore, darlin'.

by Anonymousreply 2July 24, 2024 12:53 PM

women don't want to fuck me because i'm too ugly, i could hook up with 100 guys a day if i wanted to, you must look like a straight up MONSTA

by Anonymousreply 3July 24, 2024 12:56 PM

Fat, ugly, unassertive, and dressed poorly???

by Anonymousreply 4July 24, 2024 12:56 PM

[quote]Fat, ugly, unassertive, and dressed poorly???

As a gay cruise attendee myself, the only deal killer amongst those is "unassertive."

Plenty of non-circuit boys get laid.

by Anonymousreply 5July 24, 2024 12:59 PM

OP is Lindsay Graham

by Anonymousreply 6July 24, 2024 1:00 PM

Try leaving your snack purse in the room when you waddle over to the buffet.

by Anonymousreply 7July 24, 2024 1:01 PM

You're a woman.

by Anonymousreply 8July 24, 2024 1:02 PM

Too picky?

by Anonymousreply 9July 24, 2024 1:03 PM

OP

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 10July 24, 2024 1:05 PM

[quote]

With that tongue, she doesn’t go without.

by Anonymousreply 11July 24, 2024 1:10 PM

R8 I’m not a woman but R3 sounds like a woman.

I’m definitely not assertive about pursuing anyone. At my age (58) no one going to pursue me.

I was on a cruise July 2023- I had a really nice time. I met some nice people but no sex - as usual. We had a day at sea. That morning I got on the elevator to go up to the cafeteria to have breakfast. There was one only one guy on the elevator besides me. He said good morning and then I said good morning back to him. He then asked me some Indian question about the elevator panel. I didn’t realize until later that he had been flirting with me. I’d say he was about 48 or older had a huge build and was wearing a tank top. He was definitely considered attractive but not really my type. I’m not into scene Queen types but it was flattering anyway.

by Anonymousreply 12July 24, 2024 1:11 PM

Per R6

by Anonymousreply 13July 24, 2024 1:12 PM

OP is still living with the impact of Shigella that floored him back in 2008.

Ain't no one on a cruise want any of that in their lives.

by Anonymousreply 14July 24, 2024 1:15 PM

An Indian question?

by Anonymousreply 15July 24, 2024 1:15 PM

Is R3 the OP? A woman?

by Anonymousreply 16July 24, 2024 1:17 PM

R1- I never use group chat and also I’ve never used any of the sex apps like Grindr or scruff.

by Anonymousreply 17July 24, 2024 1:18 PM

R12. Asking him to join you for breakfast would have been a sensible move rather than use “type” labeling afterwards as an excuse for missing out on a connection. You remember the incident, so an impressionable impact happened.

by Anonymousreply 18July 24, 2024 1:23 PM

Maybe you could take cruises over other year to save and hire an escort to go with you. That way you could get laid when you want and not have to fret. You could just enjoy yourself. Worrying about who is flirting and who finds you attractive doesn't sound like a very fun or relaxing vacation, doll.

by Anonymousreply 19July 24, 2024 1:24 PM

Every other year

-R19

by Anonymousreply 20July 24, 2024 1:25 PM

[quote][R1]- I never use group chat and also I’ve never used any of the sex apps like Grindr or scruff.

Then that's why you're missing out.

Yes, I've had encounters on the dance floor, but a lot of it has also been talking to people and realizing we vibe.

by Anonymousreply 21July 24, 2024 1:26 PM

I'm very dense about whether or not someone is flirting- which is very infrequently nowadays- even back in 1995 when I had a lot more curb appeal I only had some guy flirting with me once in a while ( in non gay settings).

I didn't realize that muscular guy was flirting with me until maybe an hour later- I act like a shy school girl in those situations. I was going to go a cruise to Spain but the damn cruise was sold out by the first week of February- six and a half months before the cruise- oh well.

by Anonymousreply 22July 24, 2024 1:32 PM

Hahaha. I was supposed to be on it, but can't go and haven't been able to sell my cabin, so I'm out the money. Alas.

I should be on the Halloween cruise and the Big One in February. I'm deciding about the rest of the year.

by Anonymousreply 23July 24, 2024 1:35 PM

I dated a guy once, and when he showed me a video of him on a gay cruise, doing a fucking egg toss contest on a beach, that’s when I knew it wasn’t going to work out.

by Anonymousreply 24July 24, 2024 2:03 PM

R2- That's the first time I've ever seen a datalounger say- You're NOT a whore darlin- lol

by Anonymousreply 25July 24, 2024 2:09 PM

People sense nervousness, desperation, and/or an "I'm new to this" underpinning, and most (not all!) don't want to deal with what potentially goes with them (things which could include awkwardness, tears, having to do some teaching, "velcro" aftermath, etc. etc. etc.). So how to not have an aura of nervousness, desperation, and/or an "I'm new to this" underpinning? [cue Kern's song [italic]Make Believe[/italic]]

by Anonymousreply 26July 24, 2024 3:58 PM

[quote] That morning I got on the elevator to go up to the cafeteria to have breakfast.

Please see my advice about your snack purse at r7.

by Anonymousreply 27July 24, 2024 4:05 PM

You are a whore past selling date, darling.

by Anonymousreply 28July 24, 2024 4:08 PM

[quote]"velcro" aftermath

^^I'm so confused.

With cruising, fake it until you make it. You aren't the only one who feels shy and awkward. SO just come up with an opening line and approach them. I think you'll find that 9 out of 10 people will be receptive even if they're not into going any further.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 29July 24, 2024 4:09 PM

[quote]You aren't the only one who feels shy and awkward.

My first Atlantis cruise, I had gigantic scars from my colectomy and reversal, and even without those, a massive amount of stretched skin from my weight loss. But somehow, the first night, a guy and I started kissing on the dance floor and went back to my room. And one of the guys I hooked up with, when I told him the story of why I looked the way I did, told me it made him like me more.

By the middle of the week, I was dancing with my shirt off without a care in the world.

The only way to get over the shyness and the awkwardness is just to jump in.

by Anonymousreply 30July 24, 2024 4:19 PM

R30- Thanks for your story.

I guess it's akin to just jumping into a cold swimming pool instead of slowly dipping one toe in.

by Anonymousreply 31July 24, 2024 4:30 PM

This thread is a Pat skit

by Anonymousreply 32July 24, 2024 4:31 PM

Sorry, OP, but you posted all this on a previous thread and got a lot of good, realistic suggestions. Why the repost?

I'm a very average-looking guy, 61, overweight, and I still get laid pretty much every day on gay cruises. You have to put yourself out there. Hang out in the steam room or sauna for awhile. Nude. Make eye contact with guys. Don't say that's not "you" -Doing things your usual way hasn't worked at all. Time for something different!

by Anonymousreply 33July 24, 2024 4:34 PM

R33- I did start that previous thread. The catalyst for starting this thread was viewing photos this morning of my cruise last year. I had a nice time overall but no sex and I just felt the impulse to start a new thread about the topic of no action on any of my 11 cruises since 2009.

by Anonymousreply 34July 24, 2024 4:47 PM

OP, which ones will you be on? We've got the two med cruises in August, the Halloween one, the surprise Thanksgiving one (which I would have done if I hadn't signed up to work Thanksgiving already), the Big One, and the Southern Caribbean one.

I will be delighted to be your wingman.

by Anonymousreply 35July 24, 2024 4:51 PM

R35- I was on a waiting list for the Spain cruise in August but nothing opened up- oh well.

I guess I'll have to wait until next year. This time I will sign up for a cruise by December at the latest- if there are any cruises that pique my interest. Thanks for the wingman offer. Were you by chance on the cruise at the end of August last year Royal Caribbean - that giant ship? I was on that cruise and got VERY seasick. I mentioned this in a previous thread.

by Anonymousreply 36July 24, 2024 5:05 PM

[quote] At my age (58) no one going to pursue me.

Sorry but it's not your age, OP, it's the way you look and how you carry yourself. Own it. There are plenty of 60+ guys who have younger guys lined up.

by Anonymousreply 37July 24, 2024 5:06 PM

No, I just did the Big One last year. I still have Halloween and the 2025 Big One on tap. I'm considering doing the other Caribbean one (there's supposed to be a third in March or April, which hasn't been announced), but I'm also waiting to hear about the rumored Asia cruise on Celebrity for November 2025.

by Anonymousreply 38July 24, 2024 5:08 PM

R38- I hope the have some more Mediterranean cruises next year- those are the ones I enjoy the most.

by Anonymousreply 39July 24, 2024 5:13 PM

R37- I did have this guy I mentioned earlier- he flirted with me on the elevator one morning but I did not realize he was flirting until at least an hour later.

I guess the trick is to just be friendly and open in general and not have any expectations about who may or may not be attracted to me.

by Anonymousreply 40July 24, 2024 5:15 PM

[quote]I guess the trick is to just be friendly and open in general and not have any expectations about who may or may not be attracted to me.

That's the key, my guy.

In March, I hooked up with a guy who I might not have been confident enough to get within ten feet of on land.

by Anonymousreply 41July 24, 2024 5:19 PM

R41- Good for you.

by Anonymousreply 42July 24, 2024 5:45 PM

And he texted me to tell me he's going to be on the Big One in February.

I'm having a good self-esteem day.

by Anonymousreply 43July 26, 2024 6:18 PM

R43- If he contacted you it sounds like he's still interested in sex with you again.

Good luck !

by Anonymousreply 44July 26, 2024 8:31 PM

I’ve never been on a gay cruise and never will now, but in preparation for a regular cruise, I’m in the process of getting to five pounds underweight so that eating on the cruise doesn’t make me overweight. I think it’s nice to come back from a cruise and end up just at your normal target weight. Also, my clothes will still fit at the end of the cruise. For slender people such as myself, five pounds makes a big difference. Does anyone else go underweight before a vacation?

by Anonymousreply 45July 30, 2024 1:29 PM

You’re a lesbian. And, as such, fat.

by Anonymousreply 46July 30, 2024 2:51 PM

Do most of you go on gay cruises alone? I’m recently single and depressed and was thinking about booking one, but I’ve never traveled alone.

by Anonymousreply 47July 30, 2024 3:13 PM

[quote] As a gay cruise attendee myself, the only deal killer amongst those is "unassertive."

Fuck fuck fuck goddamn motherfucking sonofabitch! Guess Ima gonna have to fake it until I make it. At least I look kinda assertive which I guess helps, and I'm also in good shape physically which I know helps

[quote]Plenty of non-circuit boys get laid.

That's more reassuring. I'm very much "non-circuit"

Hey VOTN, one other question, do a lot of skinny fem queens go on these cruises? Could be worth my while forking out for one if so, I like that type a lot

by Anonymousreply 48July 30, 2024 3:19 PM

You have a Norovirus fetish?

by Anonymousreply 49July 30, 2024 3:21 PM

R48- I had a skinny fem queen flirt with me when I was ordering lunch in the cafeteria one day. There were plenty- especially on the second cruise the one I got seasick on . That ship had far more people on it - over 4,000. The young femmy boy was on the first much smaller cruise.

by Anonymousreply 50July 30, 2024 4:11 PM

I'm glad I'm not ugly.

by Anonymousreply 51July 30, 2024 4:16 PM

[quote]Hey VOTN, one other question, do a lot of skinny fem queens go on these cruises? Could be worth my while forking out for one if so, I like that type a lot

I mean, there's a good amount of body types on display. I think you get the most variety on the Big One, since that's not only the most people, but it's also very forthrightly a circuit party, You get everything from the roided out circuit queens to some really large guys and everything in between. And if you like Asian guys, it's very close to equal number of white and Asian men on those.

The Halloween cruise is a smaller version of that. The more exotic ones, including the exotic Southern Caribbean ones, tend to skew a bit older because they're pricier. And the European cruises tilt a little more heavily international, although you get people from all over the world on the Big One.

by Anonymousreply 52July 30, 2024 4:25 PM

R52- By the Big One- do you mean a giant cruise ship of 4,000 or more people?

by Anonymousreply 53July 30, 2024 4:30 PM

Thanks R50, sounds hopeful. Never done a cruise but a gay cruise with lots of guys like that could be fun.

Thanks VOTN / R52 the Big One sounds like a good option for me, I do like Asian guys too, although I dont mind if it skews a bit older too, as long as they arent all large.

I gather the larger cruise ships have a pool, which I'd want so I can swim laps in every day (probably early morning before it gets busy), I normally do a 2km swim every day and it'd be good to at least be able to do that if I cant do my usual bike rides or hiking as well. If they do longish port stays where I'd be able to get off the boat and do hiking or bike rides that would be awesome too. Just sitting around eating and drinking all day would drive me to distraction very quickly, I dont think I could physically cope with that more than a couple of days. Any physical activity options are a plus, sex most definitely included!

by Anonymousreply 54July 30, 2024 4:39 PM

[quote]I gather the larger cruise ships have a pool

Often multiple ones.

Also gay cruises are often the only cruises where the ship's gym is busy.

by Anonymousreply 55July 30, 2024 4:53 PM

I'm considered very good looking; But I've never understood flirting. So, the assertiveness comment above is very interesting to me. I'm in very good shape, great skin, teeth, hair, 6ft 1, and my friends consider me the handsome one, but I just get no action as I'm scared to death of flirting And rejection. I can appear aloof or cold and ive had guys say No to even a quick random peck. I've also been told by a friend that I have an aura similar to.....Princess Di.....how bizarre is that? So I think I'm glad just not sexy. I'm not that into sex and would much rather the bf experience when meeting a guy. .the sex is low on my list. Could It really be a vibe I'm giving off that transcends even goodlooks?

by Anonymousreply 56July 30, 2024 4:53 PM

R55 good to know there's multiple pools so at least I can get some laps in. I get bored of gyms to be honest although if it's gonna result in fucking I'd definitely give it a try

R56 I'm reluctant to flirt outside gay only venues cos my gaydar's a piece of shit. A gay cruise would be awesome cos I could let loose without worrying about potentially hitting on straight guys. I dont much like rejection but I can deal with it if necessary

by Anonymousreply 57July 30, 2024 5:04 PM

R54- Me too. I SUPER careful about what and how much I eat on a cruise. It's depressing enough when I fall off the wagon at home and stuff my face I rarely do it on a cruise except when I get seasick. In August I got very seasick on that cruise. I walked for an hour on the treadmill in the fitness room. By the time I got back to my room I was seasick so I basically ate nothing for the day except a bit of puffed corn ( no sugar no salt) which is very low in calories. Two days later my body decided it needed to make up for those lost calories. I stuffed my face in the cafeteria after I ate my usual careful lunch. Then later that evening I took a second walk on the treadmill so it all evened out in the end. I exercise everyday myself so I too want to be able to incorporate the exercise into my cruise.

by Anonymousreply 58July 30, 2024 5:06 PM

R58 I get bored of eating pretty fast, and I also dont eat much meat and dont drink. I do have a huge weakness for carbs tho, so I need to exercise a couple hours most days.

R45 had a pretty interesting strategy to deal with this issue;

[quote]I’ve never been on a gay cruise and never will now, but in preparation for a regular cruise, I’m in the process of getting to five pounds underweight so that eating on the cruise doesn’t make me overweight. I think it’s nice to come back from a cruise and end up just at your normal target weight. Also, my clothes will still fit at the end of the cruise. For slender people such as myself, five pounds makes a big difference. Does anyone else go underweight before a vacation?

Another way to deal with this is to do intermittent fasting, which is basically what you did when you got seasick. Its a good low hassle way to lose some weight

by Anonymousreply 59July 30, 2024 5:16 PM

I mean, I've burned thousands of calories dancing at the parties. There were times that I'd be moving so much, my Apple Watch would think I was working out. One of the days on my first cruise, I took 50K steps.

by Anonymousreply 60July 30, 2024 5:17 PM

R60 VOTN, have any advice about booking the Big One eg cabin type/location, drink plans worth it, etc? They still have availability (just checked) and I might pull the trigger on an ocean view room.

by Anonymousreply 61July 30, 2024 5:26 PM

I don't think they're offering the drink plan this year. They never have an alcohol package available (because the ship would go broke), but I don't think they're even doing the Soda/Fancy Coffee/Sparkling Water/Powerade package this year either. Everyone does get a book of drink tickets (and if you're solo, you also get included internet).

In terms of cabins, the only thing I would avoid if you don't like noise is to avoid either the Boardwalk rooms (because that's where they have the tea dances) or forward under the Solarium (where the night parties are). I'm in the same room I was in this year, an oceanview balcony towards the after of Deck 11, and I didn't have any noise issues.

My cruise boyfriend for that one had a Boardwalk view balcony, and it actually wasn't that bad noise wise either.

by Anonymousreply 62July 30, 2024 5:32 PM

R62- I always request a room away from the elevators ( I don't want to hear that DING! sound all night) and not just above or below where the parties are held.

by Anonymousreply 63July 30, 2024 5:36 PM

I've done over forty cruises -nine or ten of them gay cruises. Some responses to various comments so far in this thread:

All cruise ships have swimming pools -but none of them are really designed for swimming laps. They are mostly lounging/cool-down places.

You don't have to gain weight on a cruise. Just eat normally. The fact that dessert is available at every meal doesn't mean you have to eat it. Ditto the ice cream and pizza that's usually available 24/7. Make a deal with y ourself to skip the elevators and do laps around the deck after meals and you'll be fine.

You'll see every body type on a gay cruise. Twinks. Twunks. Bears. Otters. Gym gods. Morbidly obese. Skeletal. All races, and ages from 18 to 100. And we all get laid (if we want to).

In all my cruises I've never come across a case of norovirus. Or any STIs. That's not to say they don't exist. Just that none of those bugs are as likely as some here seem to fear. Wash your goddamn hands. And your dick. Take reasonable precautions. The fact that you're at sea doesn't make the bugs heartier or more prevalent.

Definitely follow the advice and book a cabin that is away from busy venues like discos and eating places. Elevators are not nearly as much of a noise problem as the banging and thumping of a public room over your head. Yeah -look at the deck plans for the decks above and below you -not just what's around you on your own deck. If you're at all worried about seasickness, go with a cabin that is on a lower deck and more in the middle of the ship (less movement). They're also cheaper.

by Anonymousreply 64July 30, 2024 6:35 PM

[quote]In all my cruises I've never come across a case of norovirus. Or any STIs. That's not to say they don't exist. Just that none of those bugs are as likely as some here seem to fear. Wash your goddamn hands. And your dick. Take reasonable precautions. The fact that you're at sea doesn't make the bugs heartier or more prevalent.

I've never gotten any kind of GI bug (or STI) either, but in fairness, there was a pretty nasty respiratory illness that went around the Big One in January this year, which knocked me on my ass for the last few days.

But I could have picked something like that up at work, so it's kind of a risk/benefit thing.

by Anonymousreply 65July 30, 2024 6:40 PM

[quote]All cruise ships have swimming pools -but none of them are really designed for swimming laps. They are mostly lounging/cool-down places.

R64 I can turn pretty much any pool into a lap pool with a bit of creativity, especially if its quiet and empty or near empty

I dont much like ice cream or most desserts which helps some

by Anonymousreply 66July 30, 2024 7:01 PM

So, if you do book the Big One, the Allure has two main pools, and probably one of them would be free enough for lap swimming depending on time of day.

by Anonymousreply 67July 30, 2024 7:04 PM

[quote] 🚢 Since 2009 I haven’t gotten laid on ANY of them. Datalounge people- What is wrong with me?

How is that even possible. I’ve only been on three, and I topped at least 30 guys (I’m a tall top - 6’4” and heavily hung, so word gets around and I usually have guys come up to me at the various dances and parties - who want to see it, and then want more). And I’ve probably bottomed 6-7 times. A couple of times me bottoming was definitely surprise anal, but I just went with it. I was already engaged in some serious fucking, and somebody walked up behind me, shoved it in and started pounding me. That’s one of the best parts about these cruises - the unexpected and spontaneous.

by Anonymousreply 68July 30, 2024 7:09 PM

[quote] I'm glad I'm not ugly.

I’m ugly and it stinks, like it really wears one down being in public spaces. Lately I’ve been tempted to ask good looking people what it’s actually like to be them. Doing anything, they have a very different experience than I could ever have.

by Anonymousreply 69July 30, 2024 7:23 PM

R68- Your not a top actually if you've bottomed SEVEN times. I tried it when I was young- it felt like someone poking me with a stick- a big stick. I'm a top I never bottom. My favorite sexual activity though is getting sucked. I'm well hung but not huge like you. I do not have difficulty finding someone to have sex with at home but when I go on these cruises 11 total I've never had sex- oh well.

by Anonymousreply 70July 30, 2024 7:27 PM

Sorry about that R69. We should have a thread about gay people who are unattractive or average looking at best and they navigate dealing with the gay world- Grindr, Scruff, Bars, Bathhouses and GAY cruises.

by Anonymousreply 71July 30, 2024 7:29 PM

[quote]Sorry about that [R69]. We should have a thread about gay people who are unattractive or average looking at best and they navigate dealing with the gay world- Grindr, Scruff, Bars, Bathhouses and GAY cruises.

Hey, I do okay.

by Anonymousreply 72July 30, 2024 8:37 PM

I'm no Greek god either, but I do just fine on gay cruises. I don't get the gorgeous hot guys in jock straps by the pool, but I'm not looking around for bags to put over their heads either.

R69, ugly is always in the eye of the beholder. I'm sure you're perfectly normal-looking. Sit down with your next trick or a good friend and have him review your best features and qualities. (Don't even pretend you don't have any.) Try to amplify whatever your good points are. If he says you have great feet, wear flip-flops as much as possible, and prop you feet up where they can be seen. If you have a hairy chest, at least undo some buttons if you don't feel comfortable walking around shirtless. If you have a big dick, wear tight shorts/jocks/speedos/whatever shows off your package. Don't be afraid to walk around with a hard on. Put it on display! If all else fails, smile and laugh a lot. Happiness and friendliness are sexy.

And don't forget the dick deck after midnight. Everyone is there in hopes of getting off, and lots of guys are more... uninhibited in the dark. So what if that's not your "style" back home? When you see a group of guys in a circle, go join in and enjoy what they're watching. Pull you dick out and give it a stroke. Chances are, someone will reach over and give you a feel. It's your vacation! Be slutty as you like! Better to regret what you did, rather than regret what you didn't do.

Have fun!!

by Anonymousreply 73July 30, 2024 9:46 PM

R73- I guess my mentality on these cruises has always been- I need someone to express an interest in me first and if they or no one does then I just assume that no one's interested in me.

I was on a cruise in 2013. One day the excursion was touring around in a jeep type of vehicle. I did not know how to drive a manual transmission so I sat in the vehicle until 3 guys ( all friends) walked over and got in . They were pleasant enough to me. Later they picked up a friend who was left behind in another jeep. He got in the back where I sat. He was friendly but I thought he was just tolerating me. He was good looking and seemed kinda full of himself. He offered me some of his sunscreen then later ( this is where the flirting started but I did not realize it until 9 hour later in my cabin journaling the days events) he said to me- Would you mind if I put the full weight of my leg against yours. You can put the full weight of your leg against mine. I wish I could be so smooth flirting with someone like that. The next day I was finishing up another tour and was walking back to the tender which would take me back to the ship and he ran up to me smiling and said JAMES! and patted me on the back. One more thing the day before early in the day before he flirted with me. We were on the beach and he was changing out of his clothes and I saw his rather large penis- and let me say that was the ONLY penis I saw on that cruise or any other. Oh well.

by Anonymousreply 74July 31, 2024 12:35 AM

OP, just be bolder. It's ok to feel or look like an idiot sometimes.

by Anonymousreply 75July 31, 2024 12:46 AM

" It's ok to feel or look like an idiot sometimes."

I do it all the time, R75.

by Anonymousreply 76July 31, 2024 3:26 AM

R76- Making overtures to guys then getting rejected?

by Anonymousreply 77July 31, 2024 3:48 AM

Actually, R77, that's about the only way I don't make myself look/feel like an idiot. I never make overtures to guys. And, yes, it's because I fear rejection. FWIW, I'm also very aware of when I say no to guys -not to make them feel bad.

by Anonymousreply 78July 31, 2024 3:58 AM
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