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Let's Be Hurricane Katrina

I'm the destruction of New Orleans

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by Anonymousreply 42July 11, 2024 10:54 AM

I'm Barbara Bush and I'm surprised poor people exist

by Anonymousreply 1July 8, 2024 12:57 PM

Let's not.

by Anonymousreply 2July 8, 2024 1:35 PM

I'm a hurricane survivor who moved to Houston and I brought all those terrible hurricanes with me!

by Anonymousreply 3July 8, 2024 1:44 PM

R1 wins. I recall when she said her quip the DL blowing up with the general cuntery of it

by Anonymousreply 4July 8, 2024 1:50 PM

I'm the looting

by Anonymousreply 5July 8, 2024 2:07 PM

There’s still a lot of abandoned buildings. I don’t know how much of that is Katrina related though

by Anonymousreply 6July 8, 2024 2:31 PM

I'm Ray Nagin

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by Anonymousreply 7July 8, 2024 3:47 PM

We're the sheriff and the deputies on the other side of the bridge leading out of New Orleans, with our shotguns pointed at the POC attempting to flee, to make sure no "undesirables" enter our parish.

But we're not racist.

by Anonymousreply 8July 8, 2024 4:01 PM

I'm Kanye West proclaiming on national TV that George Bush doesn't care about black people.

by Anonymousreply 9July 8, 2024 4:11 PM

I'm Brownie! I did a heck of a job!

by Anonymousreply 10July 8, 2024 4:15 PM

I'm the 2004 tsunami. You call that a natural disaster?

by Anonymousreply 11July 8, 2024 4:16 PM

I’m the destruction of Bush’s presidency. Because with Americans, disastrous wars don’t matter (they’re fought overseas), but bad responses to natural disasters, they matter.

by Anonymousreply 12July 8, 2024 4:19 PM

I'm Michael D. Brown, former head of FEMA, and I watched as my career vaporized into the thin air because of my ineptitude. In fact, my name became synonymous with ineptitude.

by Anonymousreply 13July 8, 2024 4:35 PM

I the tidal surge. FEAR ME!

by Anonymousreply 14July 8, 2024 4:42 PM

I'm Mary Landrieu and I did nothing but cry

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by Anonymousreply 15July 8, 2024 5:25 PM

I'm Geraldo. Will someone get me off this goddamn ramp!

by Anonymousreply 16July 8, 2024 6:05 PM

I'm Brad Pitt, building the shitty houses that fell apart a few years later. If I had any brains at all, I would have rebuilt them using the same materials that the oldest homes are made out of.

by Anonymousreply 17July 8, 2024 7:06 PM

I'm the Superdome. It's still a travesty what those poor people did to me.

by Anonymousreply 18July 8, 2024 7:08 PM

I'm the racism

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by Anonymousreply 19July 8, 2024 7:32 PM

I'm Oprah, visiting for her show.

by Anonymousreply 20July 8, 2024 7:35 PM

I'm Barry Cowsill, spotted in the crowd at the Superdome during a news broadcast and never seen alive again.

by Anonymousreply 21July 9, 2024 1:12 AM

I'm Oprah, refusing to go into the seating areas because I don't do stairs.

by Anonymousreply 22July 9, 2024 2:19 AM

Paradise and Puerto Rico was worse.

by Anonymousreply 23July 9, 2024 8:08 AM

I'm the residents with abandoned rowboats in the yards that suddenly became helpful.

by Anonymousreply 24July 9, 2024 9:14 AM

"I'm the residents with abandoned rowboats in the yards WHO suddenly became helpful."

by Anonymousreply 25July 9, 2024 10:10 AM

I'm Mayor Magin's crack pipe. Up here in this guarded luxury suite as the city flooded, the Mayor has had me puffing away like a locomotive built in 1843.

by Anonymousreply 26July 9, 2024 11:13 AM

I'm the elderly residents abandoned in their nursing homes while the staff took off and left us there to die.

by Anonymousreply 27July 9, 2024 1:18 PM

I'm 10% of the listed strength of the New Orleans Police Department. We don't actually exist but our salaries are paid anyway and collected by 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺. I believe the case files were "mislaid" in the cleanup.

by Anonymousreply 28July 9, 2024 1:25 PM

I'm Joel Osteen and I will NOT open my church up to those in need

by Anonymousreply 29July 9, 2024 1:32 PM

Why did people stay behind again? Why weren't they evacuated, forcibly or otherwise?

by Anonymousreply 30July 9, 2024 3:36 PM

They had survived past hurricanes. Or they could not afford to leave or were medically unable to travel.

by Anonymousreply 31July 9, 2024 3:45 PM

[quote[ Why did people stay behind again?

They were told it was all clear. The worst of the hurricane had hit and passed by. BUT there was a barge that broke loose and smashed into a dyke along a shipping canal. A large lake fed the canal and emptied into the city.

This could have happened any time even without the hurricane.

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by Anonymousreply 32July 9, 2024 3:53 PM

I'm the power outages! Except when Dubya gave a speech in the French Quarter, I was restored. Then promptly shut off once he left.

by Anonymousreply 33July 9, 2024 4:14 PM

[quote] BUT there was a barge that broke loose and smashed into a dyke along a shipping canal.

I hope she hit the fucker with her cane!

by Anonymousreply 34July 9, 2024 4:27 PM

I'm one of the conspiracy theorists that believe the levees were intentionally blown up to save the French Quarter.

by Anonymousreply 35July 9, 2024 4:30 PM

I'm Celine's righteous anger awkwardly channeled into song at the behest of Larry King.

by Anonymousreply 36July 9, 2024 4:39 PM

I'm the Lower Ninth Ward.

by Anonymousreply 37July 9, 2024 4:43 PM

I'm Governor Kathleen Blanco.

"I believe we are prepared. That's the one thing that I've always been able to brag about."

People should stay, not evacuate. I also waited until the last minute to ask for federal help including the National Guard and funding, then myself and Mayor Nagin publicly argued with each other. I flew to Dallas a few days before the storm.

Oh, but I made sure to explain that the mismanagement was all George W. Bush, David Vitter, Mary Landrieu, and Ray Nagin's fault.

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by Anonymousreply 38July 9, 2024 4:50 PM

I'm the countless horrific documentaries about the hurricane.

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by Anonymousreply 39July 9, 2024 4:54 PM

I'm the happiest looter

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by Anonymousreply 40July 9, 2024 5:03 PM

I'm Police Chief Eddie Compass crying to Oprah that babies are being raped in the Superdome.

by Anonymousreply 41July 10, 2024 3:38 AM

I'm Beyonce in the "Formation" music video bringing it all back.

by Anonymousreply 42July 11, 2024 10:54 AM
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