The Velvet Chainsaw on Netflix

I quickly scanned this thread’s title, I imagined a cheese chainsaw. I was perplexed by that until I realized I had read it as “Velveeta Chainsaw”.

I think it’s actually called Velvet Buzzsaw if I remember correctly. Technically, Jake Gyllenhaal’s character is gay, but there’s not much gay content. It was pretty forgettable and fell apart after the first 30 minutes. Renee Russo was in it too (I think her husband wrote and or directed it).

Anyway, it’s a waste of time unless you consider it your duty to watch every Jake G film.

The movie was a mixture of final destination and the picture of Dorian Gay rated T for teen.

It was a mess.

It was directed by the same guy who did NIGHTCRAWLER, and I believe was his next film after.

I really loved NIGHTCRAWLER and thought it was incredible! So did many critics, and it did well.

So when this was announced… as a film about the pretentiousness of the LA art world and the back-stabbing social climbers involved, and a murderer killing key figures of the scene, people (myself included) got excited. This was gonna be good!

It wasn’t.

It has some neat moments, but they are too few of them to hold it together amongst a lot of dreariness and unintentional silliness. It just slowly all falls apart until the ridiculous ending.

In this movie you saw that Jake Gyllenhaal trims his chest hair and waxes his ass. Signs of a gay man.

The only thing I remember about that film is how terrible Tom Hiddleston's baby mama is in it and Jake G's body.

[quote]your duty to watch every Jake G film

In which case, the Datalounge condoles you.