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I live in fear of raw eggs

If I get a bit of raw egg on my fingers or the kitchen counter, I’m convinced I’m going to get sick.

Who wants to live like this?

Please tell me I have nothing to fear.

by Anonymousreply 40June 11, 2024 10:21 PM

Blanche, there's yolks on the fella.

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by Anonymousreply 1June 9, 2024 3:48 PM

You have nothing to fear but fear (of raw eggs) itself.

by Anonymousreply 2June 9, 2024 5:08 PM

You know, I always thought that it was the raw eggs which was the reason they said not to eat raw cookie dough.

Apparently, uncooked flour has significant risk for food poisoning.

by Anonymousreply 3June 9, 2024 5:12 PM

100% you will die from this. Get your life in order.

by Anonymousreply 4June 9, 2024 5:17 PM

can I have your stuff when you die?

by Anonymousreply 5June 9, 2024 5:18 PM

R3 You never heard of people drinking raw eggs?

by Anonymousreply 6June 9, 2024 5:34 PM

Homemade mayonnaise

Properly made carbonara.

by Anonymousreply 7June 9, 2024 5:56 PM


POISON! Poison!

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by Anonymousreply 8June 9, 2024 6:11 PM

People used to eat raw eggs all the time. Orange Julius, which you could get at the mall, had raw egg in it. I'm not saying it was completely safe, but if scores of people were getting violently ill, they would have noticed.

by Anonymousreply 9June 9, 2024 6:14 PM

It's the hot fashion look right now, OP.

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by Anonymousreply 10June 9, 2024 6:16 PM

I know a girl who got raw egg on her finger. She forgot and stuck that finger in her hoo-ha.

by Anonymousreply 11June 9, 2024 6:19 PM

See? I knew it!

by Anonymousreply 12June 9, 2024 6:21 PM

What's awful, OP, is that foreign infiltrators are slipping fertilized black mamba eggs into the egg cartons in American grocery stores, so people are opening their refrigerator doors and have these dangerous snakes strike out at them.

They've been keeping it quiet, but it's been terrible.

It's bad, too, when people crack an egg open and the little snake shoots out to get them. It's nearly always fatal.

by Anonymousreply 13June 9, 2024 6:31 PM

Nothing to worry about, you little bitch.

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by Anonymousreply 14June 9, 2024 6:34 PM

R13 Fertilized eggs wouldn survive in a freezer

by Anonymousreply 15June 9, 2024 6:41 PM

This is one of the reasons we have a sink with running water in the kitchen and hopefully some kind of soap next to it.

Wash your hands.

by Anonymousreply 16June 9, 2024 6:47 PM

Bonnie loved fried eggs

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by Anonymousreply 17June 9, 2024 7:58 PM

I feel that way about raw chicken juice.

by Anonymousreply 18June 9, 2024 8:00 PM

Trigger warning for OP:

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by Anonymousreply 19June 9, 2024 8:03 PM

I do too OP.

by Anonymousreply 20June 9, 2024 8:18 PM
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by Anonymousreply 21June 9, 2024 8:22 PM

What’s better than raw eggs?

Loose bacon. That’s bacon that was nearly fried, but then somebody said, “I like it rare!”

by Anonymousreply 22June 9, 2024 8:27 PM

bacon tartare

by Anonymousreply 23June 9, 2024 8:30 PM

The yolk’s on you, OP.

by Anonymousreply 24June 9, 2024 8:49 PM

My dog loves raw eggs. He scarfs them down so fast he pukes. And then he has a double treat, because he eats his egg-puke!

by Anonymousreply 25June 9, 2024 9:10 PM

Hope you’re feeding him pasteurized eggs. Salmonella can infect dogs.

by Anonymousreply 26June 9, 2024 9:16 PM

Humpty and Lorraine Dumpty

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by Anonymousreply 27June 9, 2024 9:16 PM

Move to Japan. Raw eggs are safe there.

by Anonymousreply 28June 9, 2024 9:18 PM

Man Up OP,

He's still alive.

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by Anonymousreply 29June 9, 2024 9:31 PM

I’d be tall in Japan.

by Anonymousreply 30June 9, 2024 9:31 PM

Aren't raw eggs good for you?

by Anonymousreply 31June 10, 2024 12:58 AM

OP, I thought of you an hour ago while making spaghetti carbonara.

by Anonymousreply 32June 10, 2024 1:04 AM

I never understood the point of raw egg foam in cocktails. It's has no real taste, and there are many other ways I am sure to get a foaming topping.

While we are at it, same goes for raw egg in Caesar Salad. If you drop the raw eggs, no one would notice the difference.

by Anonymousreply 33June 10, 2024 12:19 PM

Raw eggs need to live in fear of me.

by Anonymousreply 34June 10, 2024 12:22 PM

same here

by Anonymousreply 35June 10, 2024 12:26 PM

I live in fear of raw dick. If you're gonna love it, you better glove it!

by Anonymousreply 36June 10, 2024 12:35 PM

You’re gonna fucking die. And nobody, nobody wants your stuff.

by Anonymousreply 37June 10, 2024 12:48 PM

r33, I add a frothiness and softness to mixed drinks. I tried omitting myself, but drinks taste much better with a little of me in them. Maybe you suck at making cocktails?

by Anonymousreply 38June 11, 2024 9:27 PM

You're at least two years too late, OP. Otherwise, I would've suggested you take it to Maury.

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by Anonymousreply 39June 11, 2024 9:32 PM

I have my egg nog yearly at holiday time with a splash of good brandy. I never thought about raw egg. New fear unlocked.

by Anonymousreply 40June 11, 2024 10:21 PM
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