How 'hot rodent' men became Hollywood's sexiest heartthrobs! 🐀🍆

“The latest global dating trend of hot rodent boyfriends might sound offensive, but in reality, it's anything but. The reign of Golden Retriever heartthrobs is apparently over. Instead, women long for someone who is loyal, unconventionally attractive with sharp eyes and angular faces - otherwise known as a hot rodent boyfriend.”

Hot rodent men!

Seems like satire? Is it?

Three weeks ago in Dazed

Hot Rats!

There is something really off with Barry Keoghan's face. Some of those other guys are just unusual looking, but Keoghan looks like he has fetal alcohol syndrome.

Kieran Culkin is actually handsome with that square jaw. He's just short, and his hair always looks greasy.

And Jeremy Allen White just looks Eastern European.

He looks like Gene Wilder!

Does this include Tim-O-Tay, the most rodent-looking celebrity and Alexander Zverev, the German tennis player of Russian descent who is alleged to have beat his girlfriends and is known as “Ratface” on the Gays and Tennis threads?

Beaten not beat.

I don't think Jeremy Allen White belongs in this group. People like him because of his ultra jacked body. His face isn't unconventional like the other examples.

The woke progressives currently running Hollywood are anti-tradition, anti-masculinity, and anti-beauty. Their goal is for all actors, leading men and character actors alike, to be completely feminized. We may never see a Cary Grant ever again. The vast majority of women don’t want this. I don’t see this pervasive trend going away unless sane moderates are able to make a comeback.

R12=horny Frau

Is it possible that someone did an article on "hot rodent men" as "Hollywood's sexiest heartthrobs" WITHOUT mentioning Timothee? I thought he was going to be presented as Exhibit A!

R14 Thank you!

[quote] The woke progressives currently running Hollywood are anti-tradition, anti-masculinity, and anti-beauty. Their goal is for all actors, leading men and character actors alike, to be completely feminized. We may never see a Cary Grant ever again.

Well, far be it for me to interrupt a good Mary!-esque handwringing, but these things always swing back and forth.

In the 70s, we had multiple unconventional looking male movie stars as Al Pacino, Dustin Hoffman, Donald Sutherland, Elliot Gould, etc.

The pendulum swung back when the country became more conservative in the 1980s, and we went back to heartthrob types like Rob Lowe and Tom Cruise.

5’7” James Dean would like to have a word with the Cary Grant fangurl who thinks only tall masculine men can only be objects of lust.

This is no different from Benedict Cumberbatch and Robert Pattinson and a bunch of others who are absolutely hideous.

If only they still had truly handsome men like when I came around!

Not every guy was meant to be pretty, but he can make the most of what he has.

Of all the rodent actors, Bradley is at the top of the list, has there ever been a more repulsive actor? I don't think so...

Bradley Cooper is the most physically repulsive actor ever??

Even Rondo Hatton cannot compare with Bradley's sheer repulsiveness!

He looks nothing like that anymore, r23

R12 I don’t agree with this. I think pretty people are considered distractions or threatening now.

Kind of like runway models. When supermodels in the 90s became more famous than the fashion designers, they stopped using conventionally attractive models and went for “unique” looks.

With white women, they like non-threatening women in lead roles. Julia, Jennifer, Meg, Sandra are not that pretty. They were non-threatening women who women related to and liked.

This might seem like a stretch for people but in straight porn, the men are usually ugly these days compared to the 80s and 90s and 2000s and the men are non-threatening to the male ego.

What you’re talking about is alive and well on Instagram.

I thought they were all the same guy

How dare they slight the king of the rodents, Timothee!!!

[quote] has there ever been a more repulsive actor?

See R20.

Kieran Culkin is hot and I’ve always thought so but the rest of these rodent men are gross.

Ahem, hello, I'm Dustin Hoffman.

R12 Do you ever get exhausted constantly bitching about "progressives" all the time? Does every damn thread need to become political? Give it a break.

Rat Face

Jeez, I wonder how those actors feel being called having a rat face.

I'm sure they feel fine, laughing all the way to the bank and getting laid whenever they want.

r35 is right. All of us successful actors who make money and have fans screaming for us are confident about how we look!

Which modern-day celebrities look like Rondo Hatton at R24?

R35 Flavor Flav and Gene Simmons did the same.

By "modern-day celebrities," are you including bleached-blonde badly-built butch-bodied US representatives, r37?

Bradley Cooper is not a rodent. He’s an emu!

Not to be confused with the alpaca guy^^

Lautner.

I'd probably go for the alpaca Taylor Lautner over rat-faced BCoop.

Although rats do have their ability to find food, no matter what.

However:

[quote] Alpacas have a very efficient digestive system, designed for making the most of the relatively poor quality grazing upon which they have evolved. They are also proficient at extracting much of their water requirement from their food. Alpacas grazed on green pasture will drink very little water.

In the photo at R33, Timothee's face doesn't appear especially mouse-like or rat-like to me. In other photos and in films, it often does.

No clue who any of these guys are but the one in the middle is really ugly.

I love that the hysterical frau at R12 uses CARY GRANT as the exemplar of masculinity.

It’s always nice to honestly not feel the way I’m told “everyone” does (it makes me feel special) but this one is going to be hard to articulate without sounding like a supreme dork.

“Oh, me? Well, actually, no. I haven’t really experienced an attraction to rodent persons myself but I support anyone who does.”

Rodentia

Only a DLer could have come up with that theory or that headline.

Josh isn't rodent looking. He's conventionally at least "pleasant" looking, and masculine, and can be handsome.

It would be hilarious to read the DL's reaction to an actress with ears that big

There are very few people in the world I would called truly ugly, but a couple of those guys at op got beat bad with the ugly stick.

R12 I agree.

If you follow social media, you will see that many people still appreciate traditional beauty/masculinity.

That's who's being followed the most on social media .

Not these types, which is just 'woke' Hollywood going against the grain, trying to be 'revolutionary.'

But I think that social media will win out when all is said and done.

Richard Gadd

[quote] Gen Z fans are going wild for actors with unusual features

Are they really?

Zoomers think they invented everything, but there were always ugly people in Hollywood.

Zero credibility clickbait garbage

I've always held that men with less than pretty faces, but bodies built by the gods, can be the sexiest men around.

I don’t understand how they could do a piece on rodent men without mentioning Ratboy.

Josh has jug ears but they arent big at all.

[quote] There is something really off with Barry Keoghan's face. Some of those other guys are just unusual looking, but Keoghan looks like he has fetal alcohol syndrome.

I wondered if he has FAS.

Alas, I was born too early.

Surely “hot rodent” is an epic contradiction in terms….

Was Ralph Fiennes the original "hot rodent", years before they became hot?

^^Nope!

Bradley Cooper is a seagull.

The person at OP’s link has rapist eyes.

Hideous.

But I’m a lesbian and never have been able to figure out the attractions of heterosexual women and gay men. Especially baffling are the choices heterosexual women make in men.

[quote]The person at OP’s link has rapist eyes.

R67, you really shouldn't say or write things like that, even in jest and especially not anonymously. Shame on you.

How could you forget Tobey Maguire? That rat likes to burrow in Leo's hole.

I like Josh. He is rodent looking and he is hung

*not rodent looking

That one guy at OP looks a lot like Gene Wilder.

Roman Polanski. ugh.

[quote][R67], you really shouldn't say or write things like that, even in jest and especially not anonymously. Shame on you.

Mary! A Datalounge newbie has been triggered!

Quick, get her to the "safe room" with the cuddly kittens and the Play-Doh!

Jeremy's eyes, mouth, and these days body mmmmm.

R33 Looks like he just came off a cake bender or something.

Barry Keoghan looks more like an anteater. His girlfriend, Sabrina Carpenter, looks like a blonde Troll doll dressed for the ice capades.

2008 calling: Rafael Nadal is an infamous Capybara super-rodent: