I’m the six foster pitbulls.
Let’s be a lesbian house
by Anonymous | reply 116 | April 6, 2024 9:25 AM |
I'm one of the Subarus. Not one of the running ones. The one in the yard, on blocks. For parts.
by Anonymous | reply 1 | April 1, 2024 5:01 PM |
I am the random used and bloody tampons, blown out of the overflowing trashcans, suspended against the chain link fence.
The local raccoons love me! 🦝
by Anonymous | reply 2 | April 1, 2024 5:05 PM |
I’m the collection of exotic dildos hidden in the box under the bed.
by Anonymous | reply 3 | April 1, 2024 5:08 PM |
R3 “That one's made out of teak, we got it in Bali. Our last trip 13 years ago.”
by Anonymous | reply 4 | April 1, 2024 5:10 PM |
I’m the B.O. that has imbedded its self in all surfaces of the house. I’m also the Dollar Store cans of air freshener in the scent of Pinewood. Together, we make the house smell like a dirty lumberjack AKA Patty
by Anonymous | reply 5 | April 1, 2024 5:18 PM |
I’m the shelves of CDs by kdlang and the Indigo Girls.
by Anonymous | reply 6 | April 1, 2024 5:23 PM |
I'm the CPAP equipment on Nan's side of the bed.
by Anonymous | reply 7 | April 1, 2024 5:23 PM |
I'm the Georgia O'Keefe prints in the living room. Extra vulvas, please.
by Anonymous | reply 8 | April 1, 2024 5:26 PM |
I'm the pantry with plentiful amounts of dried dates to chop up, and organic coconut oil in which to hand form them into rolls.
by Anonymous | reply 9 | April 1, 2024 5:35 PM |
I'm the Jamie Oliver cookbook collection.
by Anonymous | reply 10 | April 1, 2024 5:40 PM |
I'm the pile of well-worn shoes in the foyer: Birkenstocks, Crocs, Salomon hiking boots, and black Converse All-Stars.
by Anonymous | reply 11 | April 1, 2024 5:46 PM |
I’m the “Duck your head! Now, step over the base!” Loom monopolizing the entryway.
I’m waiting for the next skein of wool Marcie has shorn, carded, and spun.
Regardless of the natural dye, the cloth will be taupe or moss green - with embedded bits of kitty litter and gravel.
by Anonymous | reply 12 | April 1, 2024 5:48 PM |
I'm the elasticated jeans and kaftan sized shirts.
by Anonymous | reply 13 | April 1, 2024 5:53 PM |
I’m the DVD collection: Monster, Boys Don’t Cry, But I’m a Cheerleader, Kissing Jessica Stein, Ellen’s standup specials, and all of Ben Affleck’s movies.
by Anonymous | reply 14 | April 1, 2024 6:01 PM |
I’m the absence of penised persons.
by Anonymous | reply 15 | April 1, 2024 6:05 PM |
I’m the Let’s Be DL threads about lesbians usually appearing for Thanksgiving and Christmas but this year repurposed for Easter/Passover time. They still have the same responses.
by Anonymous | reply 16 | April 1, 2024 6:05 PM |
I am a stunning accessory that hasn’t been used in an official capacity for years.
by Anonymous | reply 17 | April 1, 2024 9:30 PM |
I'm the drawer full of Hillary regalia and memorabilia. I can't bare to part with it. Maybe next time.
by Anonymous | reply 18 | April 1, 2024 9:47 PM |
I’m the umbrella stand in the front entryway. I contain no umbrellas, only canes.
by Anonymous | reply 19 | April 1, 2024 9:56 PM |
I'm the cookbook on the counter, open to a recipe for nutloaf.
by Anonymous | reply 20 | April 1, 2024 10:03 PM |
I'm a guy who thinks they're gonna get some kinky scene, but got his fucking ass kicked. 🤣
by Anonymous | reply 21 | April 1, 2024 10:11 PM |
I'm the cat hair in the bread pudding.
by Anonymous | reply 22 | April 1, 2024 10:13 PM |
I'm all the laptop stickers.
by Anonymous | reply 23 | April 1, 2024 10:13 PM |
I'm the Black Lives Matter banner in the living room.
by Anonymous | reply 24 | April 1, 2024 10:15 PM |
I'm the rules about bringing cilantro anywhere near the kitchen. Disobey me at your peril.
by Anonymous | reply 25 | April 1, 2024 10:16 PM |
I'm the peanut allergy signs.
by Anonymous | reply 26 | April 1, 2024 10:17 PM |
[quote] I'm the rules about bringing cilantro anywhere near the kitchen.
Some people don’t like the taste of cilantro.
by Anonymous | reply 27 | April 1, 2024 10:37 PM |
I am the question whether any lesbian post on “Let’s be a Lesbian…” threads.
by Anonymous | reply 28 | April 1, 2024 10:42 PM |
I'm Chlöe and my shenis is valid!!!! No one puts their tampons in the bathroom trash anymore since they caught me achieving gender euphoria with them and it is a HATE CRIME. LISTEN TO TRANS WOMEN.
by Anonymous | reply 29 | April 1, 2024 11:07 PM |
You've never been funny a day in your life, r29
by Anonymous | reply 30 | April 1, 2024 11:12 PM |
I'm the acoustic guitar propped in a corner of the living room.
Someone's learned three chords and thinks they can play everything!
by Anonymous | reply 31 | April 1, 2024 11:13 PM |
I’m the Six Chix comic strips taped to the refrigerator.
by Anonymous | reply 32 | April 1, 2024 11:16 PM |
I’m the Scrabble dictionary, worn and dogeared because the rules of Scrabble have been violated consistently for years.
by Anonymous | reply 33 | April 1, 2024 11:31 PM |
I'm the 'Ask Me My Pronouns' buttons sitting in the Tupperware container on the counter.
by Anonymous | reply 34 | April 1, 2024 11:32 PM |
I’m the Subaru Forester in lesbian green.
by Anonymous | reply 35 | April 1, 2024 11:35 PM |
I’m the giant dreamcatcher hanging over the bed. I catch more dust and spiderwebs than dreams these days.
by Anonymous | reply 36 | April 1, 2024 11:36 PM |
I'm the hooded sweatshirts.
by Anonymous | reply 37 | April 1, 2024 11:40 PM |
I'm the forever- behaviorally- damaged- beyond- repair rescue dog curled up in the corner. I back viciously and even snap at passersby during walkies.
"NO, ARTEMIS! Really, she never does this..."
by Anonymous | reply 38 | April 2, 2024 12:45 AM |
I'm the books piled on the side of the kitchen counter titled 'Being a Single Foster Parent' and 'A Single Woman's Guide to Adopting'.
by Anonymous | reply 39 | April 2, 2024 12:53 AM |
We’re the bottle of bourbon and box of cigars. Always stored next to the Mr. Coffee 12-cups drip brewer on the kitchen counter.
by Anonymous | reply 40 | April 2, 2024 1:29 AM |
I'm the Amazon vest.
by Anonymous | reply 41 | April 2, 2024 1:31 AM |
I’m the four cats who lounge around the herb dehydrator emitting tiny cat farts as everyone breathes the nip deeply.
by Anonymous | reply 42 | April 2, 2024 2:08 AM |
I'm the Pride Flag hanging over the driveway, off the garage.
by Anonymous | reply 43 | April 2, 2024 2:13 AM |
I’m the various sized mooncups rinsed and ready to receive their monthly goddess offerings
by Anonymous | reply 44 | April 2, 2024 2:25 AM |
I’m the well worn videos of domestic goddess Nigella Lawson
by Anonymous | reply 46 | April 2, 2024 2:28 AM |
I’m the streaming filter that hides all movies & TV shows that don’t pass the Bechdel Test.
by Anonymous | reply 47 | April 2, 2024 7:24 AM |
I'm the Tabac Blonde.
by Anonymous | reply 48 | April 2, 2024 8:38 AM |
I’m the womyn repeatedly telling the young kids decorating gingerbread men, “They’re gingerbread [italic][bold]people[/bold][/italic]!!!
The kids continue to lick icing of their fingers as they decorate the gingerbread men…
by Anonymous | reply 49 | April 2, 2024 8:51 AM |
^fuck me - I don’ know what happened to that markdown! 🫣
by Anonymous | reply 50 | April 2, 2024 8:53 AM |
I'm the disposable razors and shaving foam, purchased from the 'Men's Toiletries' section of the supermarket.
by Anonymous | reply 51 | April 2, 2024 10:45 PM |
I’m the old, falling apart “Dykes to Watch Out For” paperbacks from the 80s and 90s sitting high on a shelf. They will never, ever be given away.
by Anonymous | reply 52 | April 2, 2024 11:32 PM |
I’m the vinyl copy of Alix Dobkins “Lavender Jane Loves Women” that has been gathering dust since 1973, next to the Holly Near records.
by Anonymous | reply 53 | April 2, 2024 11:36 PM |
I'm the University of Phoenix diploma hanging on the wall.
by Anonymous | reply 54 | April 3, 2024 12:04 AM |
I’m the same five songs by Nina Simone played repeatedly on booze-laden Sunday afternoons - all featured in “Point Of No Return”.
by Anonymous | reply 55 | April 3, 2024 12:25 AM |
I kept my VCR so I could play Silkwood whenever the urge struck.
by Anonymous | reply 56 | April 3, 2024 12:35 AM |
I'm the fury when they hear "ladies" uttered on the tube.
by Anonymous | reply 57 | April 3, 2024 12:35 AM |
I'm the veggie tacos recipe the Jamie Oliver cookbook will automatically open at if someone drops the book.
by Anonymous | reply 58 | April 3, 2024 1:38 AM |
I'm the free futon from Craigslist. One womyn's junk is another womyn's treasure.
by Anonymous | reply 59 | April 3, 2024 3:03 AM |
Why do lesbians like Jamie Oliver? I’ve not heard that stereotype before
by Anonymous | reply 60 | April 3, 2024 3:27 AM |
R60 Probably because his recipes were basic and he had a roll-up-your-sleeves enthusiasm they liked. His restaurants were always popular with lesbians.
by Anonymous | reply 61 | April 3, 2024 3:34 AM |
Jamie loves cats.
by Anonymous | reply 62 | April 3, 2024 3:36 AM |
I'm the 7 foster fails.
by Anonymous | reply 63 | April 3, 2024 3:53 AM |
R53 you made me belly laugh. No offense, but you must be 80!
by Anonymous | reply 64 | April 3, 2024 3:58 AM |
I'm the Holly Hobbie doll with the spiked hair.
by Anonymous | reply 65 | April 3, 2024 4:00 AM |
R53 = Terry Castle?
by Anonymous | reply 66 | April 3, 2024 4:10 AM |
66 comments in and no mention of the oversized plaid shirts. You guys are lagging.
by Anonymous | reply 67 | April 3, 2024 4:15 AM |
I'm the Eileen Gray and Corbusier furniture and the Dior makeup in the lipstick lesbian's Lenox cottage, inherited from her socialite grandmother through a skip generation trust.
by Anonymous | reply 68 | April 3, 2024 4:30 AM |
I'm the Subaru hidden away in the detached garage at R68s Lenox cottage.
by Anonymous | reply 69 | April 3, 2024 4:33 AM |
I’m the 45 of “Lavender Blue” by Burl Ives that plays every Sunday morning after the Rotweillers have their nails trimmed.
by Anonymous | reply 70 | April 3, 2024 4:39 AM |
I'm the smutty "Girl and Cat" Balthus painting, one of the last in private collections, which lives 9 months a year in Freeport storage but summers in the dining room of the villa in Marbella, to get a rise out of Inge Rinkhoff.
by Anonymous | reply 71 | April 3, 2024 4:45 AM |
I'm the daisy still pressed in the pages of a first edition of Djuna Barnes' Nightwood, along with a love note from a sophomore to a senior at Vassar college, 1937.
by Anonymous | reply 72 | April 3, 2024 4:51 AM |
I’m the meticulous tuck-pointing on the exterior brick.
Somebody has a powerful coping mechanism.
by Anonymous | reply 73 | April 3, 2024 5:40 AM |
I'm the money we save using our vintage Flowbee*
by Anonymous | reply 74 | April 3, 2024 7:50 AM |
I’m the set of De Walt power tools - an engagement gift from the gals at the pool hall
by Anonymous | reply 75 | April 3, 2024 8:19 AM |
Wow, this thread is suddenly picking up and getting funny. I think real lesbians have joined in.
by Anonymous | reply 76 | April 3, 2024 10:42 AM |
I'm the air of menace.
by Anonymous | reply 77 | April 3, 2024 10:43 AM |
I’m the Cunning Linguist t-shirt, bumper sticker and coaster.
by Anonymous | reply 78 | April 3, 2024 12:25 PM |
I’m the free bread pudding, taken up in a cloth purse like what a child might have
by Anonymous | reply 79 | April 3, 2024 1:16 PM |
I’m the fresh cucumber in the fridge. Replaced every 2 weeks and never eaten.
by Anonymous | reply 80 | April 3, 2024 1:25 PM |
I’m the complete set of Pink Martini CD’s.
by Anonymous | reply 81 | April 3, 2024 1:54 PM |
I’m the fist size hole in the drywall.
by Anonymous | reply 82 | April 3, 2024 5:11 PM |
I'm the Suave 2 in 1 shampoo and conditioner.
by Anonymous | reply 83 | April 3, 2024 5:42 PM |
I'm an application form for the 2022 Anne Lister Research Summit (incomplete), tucked inside a well-worn copy of "The Argonauts"
by Anonymous | reply 84 | April 3, 2024 6:10 PM |
I'm the 27 medicines our rescue animals are on.
by Anonymous | reply 85 | April 3, 2024 8:15 PM |
I'm the nervous tics of the African American foster kids. Any noise we make will aggravate our 'moms'.
These White women sure get mean and angry very quickly.
by Anonymous | reply 86 | April 3, 2024 9:32 PM |
I am the Olivia travel t-shirts and flip-flops.
(Love you R79)
by Anonymous | reply 87 | April 3, 2024 9:49 PM |
I’m the faded VHS copy of “Desert Hearts” which was never upgraded to DVD or Blu Ray.
by Anonymous | reply 88 | April 3, 2024 10:21 PM |
R64, close. I’m 52! But I did work study at an LBG resource center at UMASS/Amherst in the early 90s and learned a lot.
by Anonymous | reply 89 | April 3, 2024 10:23 PM |
I’m the signed picture of Kate Clinton in the guest room.
by Anonymous | reply 90 | April 3, 2024 10:31 PM |
I'm the Justin Bieber Version 1.0 wardrobe of skinny jeans (plus size), Converse™, and waistcoats. I also have an electric shaver to do my own Biebs bowl cut!
by Anonymous | reply 91 | April 3, 2024 11:05 PM |
I'm the leftover bread pudding and nut loaf. From Thanksgiving 2023.
by Anonymous | reply 92 | April 3, 2024 11:09 PM |
R53 I bought this record from some Oakland lesbians at their yard sale a few years ago.
by Anonymous | reply 93 | April 3, 2024 11:19 PM |
I'm the kombucha scoby.
by Anonymous | reply 94 | April 3, 2024 11:22 PM |
I'm the coconut oil
by Anonymous | reply 95 | April 3, 2024 11:35 PM |
Pictures of the gorgeous smiling masculine jock son from age 10 to 22. Praise Aphrodite, he got a full ride scholarship to play soccer at Notre Dame because we'd never pay for such toxic patriarchal totemism. And besides, Lainy's upscale Wikka & Reiki storefront on the Ithaca Commons had drained his college fund.
by Anonymous | reply 96 | April 3, 2024 11:52 PM |
I’m David Crosby’s spunk in a turkey baster.
by Anonymous | reply 97 | April 4, 2024 12:04 AM |
I’m the old photo albums chronicling our MichFest journeys from the 70s to the the oughts. We did not have many pix from the year everybody got shigella.
by Anonymous | reply 98 | April 4, 2024 12:19 AM |
I'm a lesbian and I relate to none of these, although the 2 n 1 shampoo/conditioner seems accurate based on the hair I've seen on dating apps. I'll never understand lesbians who don't know how to use conditioner.
by Anonymous | reply 99 | April 4, 2024 12:41 AM |
I'm the heavy-duty chin-up bar at the top of the doorway.
by Anonymous | reply 100 | April 4, 2024 12:48 AM |
I’m the handsome faces
by Anonymous | reply 101 | April 4, 2024 12:52 AM |
I'm the landline.
by Anonymous | reply 102 | April 4, 2024 2:53 AM |
r100 knows not a single lesbian. Or woman, for that matter.
by Anonymous | reply 103 | April 4, 2024 3:18 AM |
I'm the eight spider plants.
by Anonymous | reply 104 | April 4, 2024 3:22 AM |
I’m the animal piss fro all the rescue cats and dogs all over everything. I’m also a giant pile of unwashed laundry in the corner. I get sprayed with Febreze every time a T-shirt get pulled and sniffed and worn.
by Anonymous | reply 105 | April 4, 2024 3:32 AM |
I’m the DIY bathroom remodel now in its second decade.
by Anonymous | reply 106 | April 4, 2024 3:35 AM |
I'm the tennis racket collection.
by Anonymous | reply 107 | April 4, 2024 3:41 AM |
I’m warmth. I’m an emulation of the strength of character and the fellow-feeling for guests that my owners demonstrate. Even when the guests are a bunch of catty Nancy boys.
by Anonymous | reply 108 | April 4, 2024 5:07 AM |
I’m the effortless masculinity that eludes many gay men.
by Anonymous | reply 109 | April 4, 2024 8:11 PM |
...and is generally mocked and despised in women?
by Anonymous | reply 110 | April 4, 2024 8:37 PM |
Butch lesbians are well respected in my experience. Even if they aren’t fuckable to straight guys.
by Anonymous | reply 111 | April 4, 2024 10:01 PM |
I'm the refurbished, 50 year-old, Electrolux canister vacuum. Linda did all the work on it. Even finding the spare parts.
by Anonymous | reply 112 | April 4, 2024 10:16 PM |
I'm the placenta of their invitro surrogate baby. Some was planted next to an oak sapling- the rest frozen for consumption on special occasions.
by Anonymous | reply 113 | April 4, 2024 11:07 PM |
I’m “The Moosewood Cookbook” which hasn’t been cracked open in years.
by Anonymous | reply 114 | April 4, 2024 11:31 PM |
I'm the bottle of Yellowstone Cologne.
by Anonymous | reply 115 | April 4, 2024 11:42 PM |