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Let's be the prime time drama DALLAS

I'm the Southfork barbecue.

by Anonymousreply 370April 15, 2024 2:34 AM

I'm Theresa, ironing another one of Miss Ellie's housecoats.

by Anonymousreply 1February 22, 2024 7:43 PM

I'm the Uncle-Niece incest

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by Anonymousreply 2February 22, 2024 7:44 PM

I'm Donna Reed as the replacement Miss Ellie.

by Anonymousreply 3February 22, 2024 7:45 PM

I'm Christopher Atkins' blue Speedo.

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by Anonymousreply 4February 22, 2024 7:51 PM

I’m Santana from Santa Barbara styled as a low rent Pam.

by Anonymousreply 5February 22, 2024 7:52 PM

I am Sue Ellen, jealously eyeing the black Corvette Bobby gave that bitch Pam, while I am stuck chauffeuring that old bag Miss Ellie around in a piss yellow Ford station wagon.

A couple of years from now, to make up for fucking my murderous sister and knocking her up, JR will give me a Mercedes to apologize.

by Anonymousreply 6February 22, 2024 7:53 PM

I'm that bitch Pam.

by Anonymousreply 7February 22, 2024 7:54 PM

[quote]I'm Christopher Atkins' blue Speedo.

I'm the video of his blue speedo. If this were filmed today, males would be forced to wear board shorts.

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by Anonymousreply 8February 22, 2024 8:03 PM

I'm Bobby Ewing's hot furry chest.

by Anonymousreply 9February 22, 2024 8:06 PM

I'm fat and ugly but superrich international financial criminal Bernie Cornfeld and Victoria Principal's time as one of my harem of floozies taught her all she needed to know about portraying a trophy wife in a family of Texas oil millionaires

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by Anonymousreply 10February 22, 2024 8:08 PM

I'm Lorimar.

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by Anonymousreply 11February 22, 2024 8:13 PM

I'm Dack Rambo and my character Jack Ewing is secretly bringing a fifth of whiskey in his tight blue jeans to my sister-in-law Sue Ellen who's having the shakes real bad today and everyone is checking me out but not more than they usually do and they all chalk it up to the normal delineation of my cock.

by Anonymousreply 12February 22, 2024 8:14 PM

I'm the Oil Baron's Ball and poofy 80s fashion by Travilla!

by Anonymousreply 13February 22, 2024 8:16 PM

I’m the first-season’s hilarious hurricane episode.

(Dallas is 500 miles inland.)

by Anonymousreply 14February 22, 2024 8:20 PM

I'm JR's badass, diesel-guzzling Mercedes sedan.

Fuck those hippies!

by Anonymousreply 15February 22, 2024 8:22 PM

I'm Marilee Stone, the only woman in the oil cartel! I'm smart, sexy, and devious.

by Anonymousreply 16February 22, 2024 8:38 PM

I'm Russia. You know the show was long out of ideas when they contrived a plot to take the Ewing brothers behind the iron curtain.

by Anonymousreply 17February 22, 2024 8:49 PM

I'm emeralds of the dream season.

by Anonymousreply 18February 22, 2024 8:49 PM

I'm Marc Singer's too too tight Levis in the dream season. I perfected the look on the miniseries V.

by Anonymousreply 19February 22, 2024 8:51 PM

I'm Mickey Trotter, stirring the loins of many a young male viewer.

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by Anonymousreply 20February 22, 2024 8:56 PM

I’m Ray and Donna’s little house supposedly miles away in the middle of the vast ranch.

by Anonymousreply 21February 22, 2024 9:14 PM

I’m all the orange peels surrounding Kristen for some reason.

by Anonymousreply 22February 22, 2024 9:15 PM

I’m JRs pointy eyebrows.

by Anonymousreply 23February 22, 2024 9:15 PM

I’m the original, much grander Southfork house with all the little cottages for the sons.

by Anonymousreply 24February 22, 2024 9:17 PM

I’m Tina Louise, shaking my blow dried mane of hair over and over and over.

by Anonymousreply 25February 22, 2024 9:18 PM

R13, I knew Travilla costumed some Knots Landong seasons; I had no idea he also worked in Dallas.

by Anonymousreply 26February 22, 2024 9:18 PM

I’m Charlene Tilton’s waist length hair.

by Anonymousreply 27February 22, 2024 9:19 PM

I'm Morgan Brittany playing psycho Katherine Wentworth. I have ice blue husky dog eyes and am now a fatso MAGAt!

by Anonymousreply 28February 22, 2024 9:21 PM

I’m replacement-matriarch Donna Reed!

by Anonymousreply 29February 22, 2024 9:21 PM

I'm Miss Ellie's sack dresses. Just looking at me, you'd think I was a cashier at HEB instead of one of the wealthiest ladies in Texas.

by Anonymousreply 30February 22, 2024 9:24 PM

I'm JR's regular pro whore (I forget her name).

by Anonymousreply 31February 22, 2024 9:25 PM

I'm Sue Ellen all pregnant and pissed up weaving down then highway...

by Anonymousreply 32February 22, 2024 9:26 PM

I'm Mandy Winger, JR's on again/off again slam piece R31.

by Anonymousreply 33February 22, 2024 9:27 PM

I'm Liz from The Store.

by Anonymousreply 34February 22, 2024 9:28 PM

I'm Callie Ewing and I done married J.R. an' I love him!

by Anonymousreply 35February 22, 2024 9:33 PM

I'm the affair between Ray Krebbs and his niece Lucy Ewing. I'm never spoken of after the pilot episode.

by Anonymousreply 36February 22, 2024 10:16 PM

I'm the bad lighting and other intimidation tactics employed by the producers and crew to make Donna Reed quit, so that BBG could come back.

by Anonymousreply 37February 22, 2024 10:20 PM

I am the millions of unemployed actresses that could have done a better job as Jenna Wade than the leaden Priscilla Presley.

by Anonymousreply 38February 22, 2024 10:22 PM

I am the turban Sue Ellen wears to go to the mall and the movies with Pam.

Did I mention I was Travilla’s idea?

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by Anonymousreply 39February 22, 2024 10:25 PM

I'm the Landers Sisters. We had blonde hair, big boobs, and whispery voices. One of us was on Dallas.

by Anonymousreply 40February 22, 2024 10:35 PM

I’m the one of several meals that goes uneaten at a fancy restaurant because Pam or Sue Ellen suddenly isn’t in the “mood to eat.”

by Anonymousreply 41February 22, 2024 10:36 PM

I’m the cicadas at Pam’s house that are so damn loud you can barely hear the dialogue.

by Anonymousreply 42February 22, 2024 10:37 PM

Who are these shitkickers?

by Anonymousreply 43February 22, 2024 11:13 PM

I'm Omri Katz, JR's and Sue Ellen's jewish son.

Am I gay?

by Anonymousreply 44February 22, 2024 11:46 PM

I’m the noticeable lack of chemistry between Linda Gray and Chris Atkins.

by Anonymousreply 45February 22, 2024 11:59 PM

I’m Raoul and Teresa. We are played by many different actors at first and nobody seems to notice until they finally settle on the actress who was fired from “The Jeffersons” when Florence came back.

by Anonymousreply 46February 23, 2024 12:03 AM

I’m David Ackroyd, I did not costar with Joan Van Ark on a futuristic episode of Wonder Woman

by Anonymousreply 47February 23, 2024 12:06 AM

I’m the horses that occasionally run over the front lawn.

by Anonymousreply 48February 23, 2024 12:11 AM

I’m the reflection of the helicopter 🚁 caught in the mirrored skyscraper.

by Anonymousreply 49February 23, 2024 12:43 AM

I’m Susan Lucci, and even I can’t breathe new life into this aging shit show despite my stunt casting. My awful storyline didn’t help matters.

by Anonymousreply 50February 23, 2024 1:16 AM

I’m Miss Ellie and I don’t like the way this conversation is going.

by Anonymousreply 51February 23, 2024 1:21 AM

I’m cocktail hour with the whole family and I was responsible for some of the best scenes in the early years. It’s a shame they got rid of me.

by Anonymousreply 52February 23, 2024 1:25 AM

I am Afton Cooper. I started as a cute lady-villain and spent my last two years on the show to be a sounding board for Cliff when he had no-one else to talk to.

by Anonymousreply 53February 23, 2024 1:25 AM

And I am Phyllis and Sly. We are the only employees Ewing Oil ever had. Or did you ever see anyone else? But don't think that we were short staffed. Barnes Wentworth had only one employee (Jackie) and an occasional controller for a week or two.

by Anonymousreply 54February 23, 2024 1:29 AM

I’m Cliff’s apartment (in reality, an apartment on Carlisle St. about to be torn down for yet another 22-story high-rise apartment building.)

Also, I found the interior shots convincing, because only a straight man could tolerate that pastel ugliness.

by Anonymousreply 55February 23, 2024 2:22 AM

I'm Knots Landing, where Bobby is still dead and no one knows about the it-was-all-a-dream season.

by Anonymousreply 56February 23, 2024 2:45 AM

I am the former fiction president of CBS who regrets that everybody got the dream wrong. Bobby IS actually dead. Pam didn't dream his death. In fact, she started dreaming right after her wedding with Mark Graison. She has not woken up from it yet and is still dreaming. Everything after her wedding is a dream.

by Anonymousreply 57February 23, 2024 3:33 AM

I'm the bizarre It's a Wonderful Life - type series finale, with Joel Grey as the angel who shows a suicidal JR highlights of his life. But wait -- the "angel" is actually the devil, and goads JR into blowing his brains out!

Everyone involved wants you to forget me.

by Anonymousreply 58February 23, 2024 4:07 AM

I'm the dream season.

by Anonymousreply 59February 23, 2024 4:56 AM

I'm a highball glass.

by Anonymousreply 60February 23, 2024 5:07 AM

I'm Sue Ellen, hitting rock bottom and going to the drunk tank. Even though I was great character development, I was all just part of that cunt Pam's dream.

by Anonymousreply 61February 23, 2024 5:46 AM

... and Leigh McCloskey as Mitch

by Anonymousreply 62February 23, 2024 9:51 AM

I'm Suellen of Assisi.

by Anonymousreply 63February 23, 2024 9:56 AM

I’m the explosion of dirt in the opening that isn’t nearly as impressive as it seemed all those years ago.

by Anonymousreply 64February 23, 2024 10:13 AM

I am Takapa!!

by Anonymousreply 65February 23, 2024 10:15 AM

I’m all those blondes in the final seasons who could not hold a candle to Sue Ellen or Pam.

by Anonymousreply 66February 23, 2024 10:24 AM

I am underrated April Stevens. I am a much more interesting of character than Pam. I have fun with the boys but always managed to keep J.R. at bay and still remained friendly with him. I never nagged at Bobby when he wasn't 120% ethical. I suffered from poor writing though. Once I had to pose as a helpless victim because Bobby needed to safe someone from Tommy McKay.

by Anonymousreply 67February 23, 2024 12:11 PM

I’m the lyrics to the theme song:

J.R., J.R.,

He’s a real bad dude

And he lives

On a ranch

With his moommm!

by Anonymousreply 68February 23, 2024 12:52 PM

[quote]I am the millions of unemployed actresses that could have done a better job as Jenna Wade than the leaden Priscilla Presley. —Morgan Fairchild and Francine Tucker

I'm Morgan Fairchild; I don't know about Francine, but no way was I playing the mother of a teenager! Did you SEE how hot I was in The Seduction?

by Anonymousreply 69February 23, 2024 9:06 PM

I'm Ray Krebs, having yet another unhealthy obsession with a teenager -- this time my 14-year-old stepdaughter Charlie.

by Anonymousreply 70February 23, 2024 9:08 PM

I'm Brad Pitt as Charlie's randy boyfriend, literally named Randy

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by Anonymousreply 71February 23, 2024 9:10 PM

I’m Sue Ellen, singing “People” at gunpoint.

by Anonymousreply 72February 24, 2024 11:56 AM

I'm Sue Ellen using my toned gams to seduce wimpy college guys when JR is out catting around

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by Anonymousreply 73February 24, 2024 12:12 PM

I'm Sue Ellen's empty glass.

by Anonymousreply 74February 24, 2024 12:31 PM

I'm the forgettable stream of cousins who added nothing to a (too) long running season.

by Anonymousreply 75February 24, 2024 12:51 PM

Miss Ellie should have been a stronger character.

There, I said it.

by Anonymousreply 76February 24, 2024 12:51 PM

I'm the Vatican parody of the intro.

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by Anonymousreply 77February 24, 2024 12:57 PM

I am Lorimar Telepictures. I had my own power struggle. I tried to take over a competitor, but instead it ate me. As a result we cut costs everywhere. We let go legacy actors, writers, everything really. We even moved photography from film to video. Sure it looks like shit, but we saved so much money. As a result, everything got less: spending, quality, viewers...

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by Anonymousreply 78February 24, 2024 1:57 PM

LOL R77. The Flying Nun was the Sue Ellen of that show.

by Anonymousreply 79February 24, 2024 2:29 PM

R77... thanks for the laugh of the morning. The cast is hilarious.

by Anonymousreply 80February 24, 2024 2:32 PM

I am the baby gay who could whistle the entire Dallas theme, My grandma thinks I am extraordinary. I also have a stuffed toy squirrel I named Sue Ellen.

by Anonymousreply 81February 24, 2024 11:53 PM

I’m Colleen Camp. I was a much skankier Kristen Shepard.

by Anonymousreply 82February 25, 2024 1:02 AM

I’m the terrible 80s perm that Pam gets. I’m around for maybe three episodes then I’m gone.

by Anonymousreply 83February 25, 2024 1:04 AM

I’m Pam’s place of employment. She keeps calling me “the store” so the brilliant writers decide to formally name me The Store.

by Anonymousreply 84February 25, 2024 1:05 AM

I'm Clayton Farlow's mustache! I'd give Miss Ellie a tickle every so often.

by Anonymousreply 85February 25, 2024 1:17 AM

I'm Jock Ewing, I was more man than all of my sons put together.

by Anonymousreply 86February 25, 2024 1:19 AM

I’m Sue Ellen’s quivering top lip. I will be doing double time when JR sends me to the sanatorium AGAIN

by Anonymousreply 87February 25, 2024 5:52 AM

I'm the pre-dinner cocktails in the Southfork living room. Sue Ellen was already on her second bottle of vodka by that time.

by Anonymousreply 88February 25, 2024 5:55 AM

I am Barbara Bel Geddes, as Miss Ellie, saying in a concerned voice, "Jock".

by Anonymousreply 89February 25, 2024 7:17 AM

I’m Cliff Barnes, moodily scheming in my condo while eating Chinese from those cute takeout cartons 🥢🥡

by Anonymousreply 90February 25, 2024 9:14 AM

I'm the extensive use of Aquanet.

by Anonymousreply 91February 25, 2024 9:19 AM

I'm waking up from a night's sleep with a full face of heavy makeup.

by Anonymousreply 92February 25, 2024 10:22 AM

I'm Frenemies Sue Ellen and Pam's shopping trip to Hong Kong!

by Anonymousreply 93February 26, 2024 3:59 PM

R93 From the famous Hong Kong restaurant scene:

Pam: I think it’s time that I went on the offensive. [Motions for a nearby servant.] Waiter, may I have the phone, please? Thank you. [The waiter brings a phone to the table, plugs it into a wall jack. Pam dials a number.] Hello, may I speak with Mr. Chan? This is Pamela Ewing. Good morning, Mr. Chan. No, I’m not calling to say goodbye. I’m calling to say that I won’t be leaving Hong Kong until I see Mark Graison, because I’m convinced that Mr. Swanson is Mark Graison. You see, I’m very rich, and very determined. And if I have to, I’ll buy that damned clinic and walk in as the owner. Oh, but I would do that. So Mr. Chan, you can tell your Mr. Swanson that he can see me now or he can see me later, but he is going to see me. Goodbye, Mr. Chan. [Hangs up]

by Anonymousreply 94February 26, 2024 7:34 PM

I'm Josh Henderson's sexy, supposedly hetero bubble butt thrusting out at every opportunity in the reboot(y).

by Anonymousreply 95February 26, 2024 8:39 PM

I’m Lucy in the pilot telling Pam that she doesn’t stand a chance before telling her the “Knots Landing” backstory.

by Anonymousreply 96February 26, 2024 9:01 PM

I’m those sans-a-belt jumpsuits JR wore in the early seasons.

by Anonymousreply 97February 26, 2024 9:03 PM

I'm Holly Harwood. I fucked JR but I really wanted to jump Bobby's bones.

by Anonymousreply 98February 26, 2024 9:04 PM

I'm the variable appearance of Miss Ellie, and the broken heart of Donna Reed.

by Anonymousreply 99February 26, 2024 9:32 PM

I'm the open parking space that's always available directly in front of the Ewing Oil Building.

(Seriously, those rednecks didn't have an underground garage with reserved Ewing parking?!)

by Anonymousreply 100February 26, 2024 9:33 PM

I'm Michelle Stevens' short hair!

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by Anonymousreply 101February 26, 2024 11:08 PM

I’m the oil tanker truck Pam crashes into so Victoria Principal can leave the sinking ship that is Dallas, never to return.

by Anonymousreply 102February 27, 2024 12:04 AM

I'm the mummy they cast as Pam when she was in the post-crash burn unit.

by Anonymousreply 103February 27, 2024 12:18 AM

I’m slutty Mandy Winger in trashy red lip gloss

by Anonymousreply 104February 27, 2024 5:00 AM

Mandy always walked with the gait of someone freshly fucked by a giant cock.

by Anonymousreply 105February 27, 2024 5:21 AM

I'm Mandy Winger. I could have been First Lady if I married Donald Trump.

by Anonymousreply 106February 27, 2024 5:39 AM

I’m a tramp, a drunk and an unfit mother.

by Anonymousreply 107February 27, 2024 6:28 AM

I'm Mandy's heartbreak after being dumped by JR and Sue Ellen, as his mistress and the body of Valentine.

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by Anonymousreply 108February 27, 2024 6:44 AM

I'm Valene's waitressing job at The Hot Biscuit.

by Anonymousreply 109February 28, 2024 2:17 AM

I’m that wintry, cold first season. But season two starts in the summer and we’re all warm and tan by the pool.

by Anonymousreply 110February 28, 2024 2:26 AM

I'm the interior of the real Southfork house used in the remake/continuation series.

I'm not nearly as grandiose as the sets used in the original series, which were based on the interior of a completely different house in Dallas.

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by Anonymousreply 111February 28, 2024 2:42 AM

I am Fern Fitzgerald. I play Marilee Stone to perfection. I have the looks and the attitude to play everybody against the wall. They only booked me once or twice a year, and yet I was more memorable than some of the regulars.

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by Anonymousreply 112February 29, 2024 3:20 AM

I'm the items of clothing and jewelry from the Lorimar wardrobe department seen worn by major characters in both shows.

by Anonymousreply 113February 29, 2024 3:52 AM

I meant Falcon Crest and Dallas.

by Anonymousreply 114February 29, 2024 1:08 PM

I'm the matching yellow and white awnings and yellow patio furniture/cushions at Southfork!

by Anonymousreply 115March 1, 2024 4:27 PM

[quote]I'm Valene's waitressing job at The Hot Biscuit.

I'm the hot biscuit.

by Anonymousreply 116March 1, 2024 4:32 PM

I am the new haircut Sue Ellen sports in the season 6 premiere. Dallas Memorial must have a fabulous beauty salon, or she sent her hairstylist to Cliff’s room, because she ends season 5 in Cliff’s room with shoulder length hair, and leaves the room in season 6 (minutes later) with a mullet.

by Anonymousreply 117March 1, 2024 4:41 PM

[quote] I’m Pam’s place of employment. She keeps calling me “the store” so the brilliant writers decide to formally name me The Store.

They called it "The Store" because it was supposed to be Neiman-Marcus, and everyone at that time in dallas referred to Neiman's as "The Store."

by Anonymousreply 118March 1, 2024 4:48 PM

Don't be jealous, bitches, but I'm going to meet about 30 DALLAS cast members at the Hollywood show this weekend.

Lindsay Bloom is going to be there! I'm going to wear a big fake fur coat and throw a drink in her face!

"Drinks are on BONNIE!"

by Anonymousreply 119March 1, 2024 4:53 PM

[quote]she ends season 5 in Cliff’s room with shoulder length hair, and leaves the room in season 6 (minutes later) with a mullet

To be fair, Cliff always needed a side hustle.

by Anonymousreply 120March 1, 2024 4:57 PM

Im the slut that's got to be more interesting than Sue Ellen whom JR is going to spend the night with.

by Anonymousreply 121March 1, 2024 4:59 PM

I'm the ever-ready decanter of spirits.

by Anonymousreply 122March 1, 2024 5:18 PM

You work a LOT, r122.

by Anonymousreply 123March 1, 2024 5:23 PM

I'm the sanitarium, visited often by Digger Barnes and Sue Ellen. I don't exist anymore.

by Anonymousreply 124March 1, 2024 5:24 PM

Hello, I'm Shelley Duvall, Fort Worth native. Why wasn't I on this program?

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by Anonymousreply 125March 1, 2024 5:27 PM

I'm John Ross, feeling anxious when Peter insists we shower together after swim lessons.

by Anonymousreply 126March 1, 2024 5:46 PM

I'm the CUNT. These dramas always have a cunt who suffers no real consequences. You gay guys love me.

by Anonymousreply 127March 1, 2024 5:48 PM

I am Kristin Shepherd, returning from LA in the season 4 cliffhanger eith an expensive coke addiction JR better pay for. I look like hell because of the drugs, and it will end with me floating in the pool.

by Anonymousreply 128March 1, 2024 6:24 PM

^Actually you looked fantastic and didn't seem to have any unhealthy behaviors at all. You appeared totally clear and collected when you demanded more money from J.R. I was shocked to hear that you had a coke addiction. Somebody must have slipped you something before you fell into the pool.

by Anonymousreply 129March 1, 2024 6:49 PM

[quote]I'm John Ross, feeling anxious when Peter insists we shower together after swim lessons.

Anxious, or excited?

by Anonymousreply 130March 1, 2024 7:47 PM

Peter was played by Christopher Atkins circa 1983. You should count your lucky stars, John Ross.

by Anonymousreply 131March 1, 2024 8:37 PM

I am Dusty Farlow. I am completely gorgwous.

by Anonymousreply 132March 1, 2024 10:57 PM

R117, same thing happened on “Knots Landing” between its own Season 5 and 6. Abby gets kidnapped by the Wolfbridge Group and has a big, teased hairstyle. Comes back the next season and she’s still in the car but now has a softer ‘do that’s got several inches cut off.

by Anonymousreply 133March 2, 2024 12:38 AM

Chandler on Friends lost 40 pounds overnight.

by Anonymousreply 134March 2, 2024 1:44 AM

I'm John Ross. My blood type is 90 proof.

How was he not a fetal alcohol baby? Sue Ellen was ALWAYS drunk when pregnant. I know it was the 70s but did they just let pregnant women drink like crazy back then?

by Anonymousreply 135March 3, 2024 3:14 PM

I'm the fly hovering over the breakfast buffet out by the swimming pool.

by Anonymousreply 136March 3, 2024 3:29 PM

I'm the nicotine stains on Cliff Barnes teeth.

by Anonymousreply 137March 3, 2024 3:31 PM

I'm tiny Lucy, having to shop at the children's section of The Store.

by Anonymousreply 138March 3, 2024 3:35 PM

I'm Century City, which looks nothing like Downtown Dallas.

by Anonymousreply 139March 3, 2024 3:36 PM

I'm Punk Anderson's toupee

by Anonymousreply 140March 3, 2024 3:45 PM

I'm Tina Louise thinking she's moved onto bigger and better things and only to be killed off after 6 episodes.

by Anonymousreply 141March 3, 2024 3:49 PM

I'm the hay in the barn when Lucy was having sex with Ray Keene . Not knowing he was really her uncle , she loved visiting the barn daily. I never get talked about anymore and probably got fed to one of the cattle that Jock sold in Ft.Worth. Then I became a steak on your plate at the Ewing BBQ until Cliff Barnes came in to arrest JR . Circle of life 🤷‍♂️

by Anonymousreply 142March 3, 2024 3:59 PM

I'm Sue Ellen's "mouthwash" at the Sanitarium!

by Anonymousreply 143March 3, 2024 4:25 PM

I'm Miss Ellie's sensible wardrobe, makeup and hairstyle. There's no reason to look like a tramp when you've reached 60.

by Anonymousreply 144March 3, 2024 4:31 PM

That video at R108. Where do I begin?:

Is that Marcia Gay Hardin as the agent?

I never noticed Sue Ellen's fucked up front teeth before and it's distracting.

Mandy has one of the worst nose jobs I've ever seen, but that was the "look" back then.

Why does Sue Ellen whisper-speak?

I was a young gayling (10 yo) when this scene aired but I remember it from its deviousness, hoping one day I'd be as vicious as Sue Ellen.

by Anonymousreply 145March 3, 2024 5:31 PM

I’m the Lorimar producers who gave the male talent anything they wanted but if the female stars wanted more money or just to move on to other projects they would be killed off or replaced in the most ridiculous plot lines (see esp Victoria Principal’s last scene).

by Anonymousreply 146March 3, 2024 9:45 PM

I'm JR'S whores!

by Anonymousreply 147March 4, 2024 12:22 AM

I’m the lack of a space in the word primetime.

by Anonymousreply 148March 4, 2024 12:29 AM

R111. That Park Lane house is way more bucolic, and much more fitting for the characters than the 'iconic' Southfork ranch or the continuation's interiors.

The sets were actually very small, and would not have been difficult to recreate on a sound stage.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 149March 4, 2024 12:58 AM

I remember how disappointed I was when I learned it was filmed on a set in Hollywood, except for some of the exterior scenes.

by Anonymousreply 150March 6, 2024 9:41 PM

I’m the missed opportunity of making the Miss Ellie character an Alexis Carrington-like beeyotch. They should have gone with a villainous matriarch

by Anonymousreply 151March 6, 2024 9:46 PM

I'm J.R. Ewing's illegitimate daughter, never introduced because the reboot was axed.

by Anonymousreply 152March 6, 2024 10:00 PM

I'm Sue Ellen's psychiatrist, Dr. Elby, unblinking and emotionless.

by Anonymousreply 153March 7, 2024 5:39 PM

Dr. Elby was creepy. He always looked like he was going to sneak into Southfork to steal Sue Ellen’s panties.

by Anonymousreply 154March 7, 2024 5:49 PM

[quote] I’m the missed opportunity of making the Miss Ellie character an Alexis Carrington-like beeyotch. They should have gone with a villainous matriarch

But who would want to watch that/

by Anonymousreply 155March 9, 2024 9:33 PM

We had sad faced Miss Ellie for an hour on Friday nights, followed by a vinegary old bitch at Falcon Crest. What's the problem?

by Anonymousreply 156March 10, 2024 2:55 AM

[quote] I'm J.R. Ewing's illegitimate daughter, never introduced because the reboot was axed.

Refresh my memory please. In what context did this come up? I know that Cally was pregnant when she left Dallas, but not sure they ever mentioned the gender or name. And that child wouldn't be illegitimate.

by Anonymousreply 157March 10, 2024 2:13 PM

R157 the name of the woman JR knocked up was never mentioned. It was like 10 years ago when the reboot ended, but I got the impression it wasn’t Callys.

by Anonymousreply 158March 10, 2024 4:17 PM

I’m Larry Hagman’s liver.

by Anonymousreply 159March 10, 2024 4:23 PM

R159, which one are you, the first or the second?

by Anonymousreply 160March 10, 2024 7:52 PM

I'm butch Susan Flannery as JR's publicist.

by Anonymousreply 161March 11, 2024 4:19 PM

Didn’t Hagman dislike Flannery. I recall him giving an interview when his autobiography came out, and he was asked which of JR’s bed partners was his favorite/least favorite. He said there was only one he didn’t like, and while he didn’t name her, he dropped clues that made me think it was Flannwry.

by Anonymousreply 162March 11, 2024 5:00 PM

Dack Rambo said Hagman was a homophobic asshole to him. You'd think his mother would have raised him better.

by Anonymousreply 163March 11, 2024 5:28 PM

I am Ken Kercheval, giving Victoria Principal’s private phone number to Joan Rivers, who then called her live on television.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 164March 11, 2024 5:38 PM

[quote] I'm the hay in the barn when Lucy was having sex with Ray Keene .

Oh, [italic]dear.[/italic]

by Anonymousreply 165March 11, 2024 5:40 PM

R135, yes, they did; Sue Ellen's doctor told her to stop drinking and then said "Not even wine with dinner" as if she'd go ahead and still drink wine at dinner.

Different times. I'm glad they didn't do an alcohol fetal storyline where the kid came out damaged.

by Anonymousreply 166March 11, 2024 6:09 PM

That story line with Susan Flannery was kinda pointless. She came in to advice him with PR stuff and it was insinuated that she had a hidden agenda. But I don't think it was ever revealed what her motivation was. And other than revealing some of his secrets, I don't think she ever did any plotting.

by Anonymousreply 167March 11, 2024 6:20 PM

R162 It was not at all believable that JR would've been attracted to Susan Flannery. He liked 'em with big hair and big boobs, mostly. Although she was playing hard to get, which turned him on because he liked the chase and conquest.

by Anonymousreply 168March 11, 2024 6:50 PM

That was rather disappointing. I remember that she had this little tape recorder she would use, but as best I recall nothing ever came of that.

by Anonymousreply 169March 11, 2024 9:36 PM

To be fair, Susan Flannery was quite beautiful on Dallas.

by Anonymousreply 170March 12, 2024 2:00 AM

I'm the cheesy little "wrist dance" that Susan Howard does in her very first scene.

Scroll to 0:30.

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by Anonymousreply 171March 12, 2024 9:47 PM

I am the Winger Tramp, walking into Sue Ellen’s very 80s looking office bowlegged, like I got fucked by a giant dick.

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by Anonymousreply 172March 12, 2024 11:14 PM

I'm Braddock County. I don't exist in real life and was made up for the show.

by Anonymousreply 173March 12, 2024 11:47 PM

I'm Donna. When I first appeared on Dallas, I was supposed to be about 30 years old. I always looked like I was a middle aged frump.

by Anonymousreply 174March 13, 2024 12:53 AM

Yes, R174, and I did a stupid little wrist dance as shown in R171. Do keep up.

by Anonymousreply 175March 14, 2024 5:54 AM

[quote]R145 That video at [R108]. Where do I begin? … Mandy has one of the worst nose jobs I've ever seen

That’s Deborah Shelton.

After BODY DOUBLE was assembled they decided to hire another actress (Helen Shave) to dub all her dialogue.

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by Anonymousreply 176March 14, 2024 7:07 AM

I'm Miss Ellie showing up in the background at one of Angela Channing's parties at Falcon Crest. I have no lines but am sick of the trashy Southfork parties that have no class or elegance.

by Anonymousreply 177March 15, 2024 12:31 AM

I'm Sue Ellen's hair. Usually I was magnificent and I avoided Pam's poodle perm, but I got stuck with a mullet later on. Guess I'll have a drink now since I'm hideous.

by Anonymousreply 178March 18, 2024 6:30 AM

I'm Rebecca Wentworth's unfortunate choices of eye shadow.

by Anonymousreply 179March 29, 2024 4:36 AM

[quote] I’m Charlene Tilton’s waist length hair.

To be fair, that only amounted to maybe 6"

by Anonymousreply 180March 29, 2024 1:07 PM

I'm Barbara Bel Geddes wondering how the fuck I went from OG Maggie the Cat on Broadway to Southern-fried dishrag of a housefrau. Well, at least I made mint off it.

by Anonymousreply 181March 29, 2024 1:56 PM

I'm Miss Ellie's cancer-laden titties, I'll be gone by the end of the season.

by Anonymousreply 182March 29, 2024 1:57 PM

R180 LOL

by Anonymousreply 183March 29, 2024 4:25 PM

I’m the bottle of hooch hidden in Sue Ellen’s giant shoulder bag next to the Binaca and the wallet overstuffed with department store credit cards.

by Anonymousreply 184March 29, 2024 4:33 PM

I'm the whole Ewing clan who never question the imposters who replaced so many of our relatives and friends. Digger Barnes, Miss Ellie, Gary, Jenna Wade, Kristin...

by Anonymousreply 185March 30, 2024 12:10 AM

I'm Peyton Place, pissed off that everyone forgot about me when saying Dallas invented nighttime soaps.

by Anonymousreply 186March 30, 2024 2:46 AM

I'm Lucy's gigantic forehead (well, for a midget). Why didn't I have bangs?

by Anonymousreply 187March 30, 2024 3:16 AM

I'm the smell of pungent horseshit wafting on every breeze while the Ewings insist on having their meals on the patio

by Anonymousreply 188March 30, 2024 3:18 AM

I’m the pantyhose Sue Ellen likes to wear poolside with her bathing suit.

by Anonymousreply 189March 30, 2024 5:17 AM

I'm Mickey Trotter's almost unibrow!

by Anonymousreply 190March 30, 2024 5:20 AM

I'm Peter Richards Speedo.

I'm so tiny!

by Anonymousreply 191March 30, 2024 7:52 AM

I’m the shotgun in the hall closet waiting for Ray

by Anonymousreply 192March 30, 2024 8:02 AM

I'm all the blow jobs given by Sue Ellen Shepard to win the Miss Texas beauty contest

by Anonymousreply 193March 30, 2024 2:34 PM

I'm David Ackroyd forever pissed off that I did a forgettable TV movie remake of Little Women instead of a 14 year stint on some other TV show.

by Anonymousreply 194March 30, 2024 2:37 PM

I'm horny Holly Harwood and even hornier Marilee Stone!

by Anonymousreply 195March 30, 2024 2:39 PM

R145 I'm glad someone noticed Sue Ellen's Fucked up front teeth! Truly bizarre! Either one is pushed forward too far or the other is pushed back too far, but whichever it is, it was always distracting to me!

by Anonymousreply 196March 30, 2024 3:30 PM

I'm the glass of club soda that Sue Ellen tells everyone she's drinking (and I really am club soda not vodka.)

by Anonymousreply 197March 30, 2024 7:56 PM

I'm the desiccating skin of Dried-Apple-Face Miss Ellie, with her one tone of delivery in every fucking scene she is in.

They ditched Donna Reed, though, because she kept playing TV Donna Reed instead of Miss Ellie. And her filter was almost as thorough as the one they used for Lana Turner in "Falcon Crest," who appeared as a blur of light and makeup, like a phantom crone.

by Anonymousreply 198March 30, 2024 8:38 PM

I'm Cliff's lifelong issue with premature ejaculation.

As in when the briefs come down I go off.

Digger, Digger.

by Anonymousreply 199March 30, 2024 8:40 PM

I'm Clayton's puppy dog crushing on Sue Ellen. And Sue Ellen's cluelessness about it.

by Anonymousreply 200March 30, 2024 9:04 PM

I'm Miss Ellie's cruel streak by keeping a fully stocked liquor cart while two known alcoholics stumble around the house.

by Anonymousreply 201March 30, 2024 10:46 PM

I'm all the asbestos and oily rags in Southfork that caused the place to ignite like a tinderbox at the end of season 6

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by Anonymousreply 202March 30, 2024 10:51 PM

[quote] two known alcoholics

JR and Sue Ellen, but Bobby was kind of a drinker too. And Pam. And Ray. And Donna.

by Anonymousreply 203March 31, 2024 4:04 AM

Yes, they were all boozers -- but that really was a different time when there was a cocktail hour and three martini lunches. The two alcoholics I meant were Sue Ellen and Gary. Presumably, the liquor wasn't anything new so it was around when Gary still lived at Southfork. Miss Ellie was a cunt.

by Anonymousreply 204March 31, 2024 4:18 AM

I'm Suzanne Somers. Crying and throwing popcorn ant the screen when Jenilee Harrison comes on.

by Anonymousreply 205March 31, 2024 4:23 AM

Suzanne worked with Patrick Duffy on Step by Step.

by Anonymousreply 206March 31, 2024 6:13 AM

I'm Lucy Ewing, quietly seething over my share of the inheritance shrinking every time another bastard child pops up out of nowhere.

by Anonymousreply 207March 31, 2024 3:15 PM

I’m the delusional writers attempting to make sexy midget Lucy into a model, even though Charlene Tilton is a squat little thing with Miss Piggy legs.

by Anonymousreply 208March 31, 2024 3:32 PM

I am Alan Beam . I had a hot hairy chest and could have been a major political figure in Texas if not for that Ewing midget .

by Anonymousreply 209March 31, 2024 4:23 PM

R207 Or when some guy I have been sleeping with turns out to be Jock’s son.

by Anonymousreply 210March 31, 2024 4:37 PM

I'm the sliding doors to the dining room that were never closed except the night that I'm also the candles that were "always" lit in the evening at Southfork and set the fire in the lameass set up of the cliffhanger at R202.

Phew, I'm busy.

by Anonymousreply 211March 31, 2024 4:47 PM

R209 - Randolph Powell, who played Alan Beam, definitely got my attention as a gayling. That chest!

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by Anonymousreply 212March 31, 2024 4:50 PM

I’m Sue Ellen’s cirrhotic liver.

by Anonymousreply 213March 31, 2024 5:13 PM

We’re Clayton, Pamela and Mitch, and we can’t believe we married into this family of weirdos.

by Anonymousreply 214March 31, 2024 5:39 PM

R6- Actually it was a Mercury Colony Park Station Wagon .

by Anonymousreply 215March 31, 2024 5:43 PM

R212- In 1980 showing a hairy chest on tv was not against the law .

by Anonymousreply 216March 31, 2024 5:44 PM

R208- You’re wrong 😑.

Back in 1980 that was my favorite TV show and my older brother would catch a glimpse of it while I was watching it and when he saw Lucy on the show he said -what a piece of ass!

by Anonymousreply 217March 31, 2024 5:46 PM

I'm the gay one who broke Lucy's heart.

by Anonymousreply 218March 31, 2024 5:49 PM

They should have written Clayton into Ewing Oil, at least for a while. J.R. messes up a deal, almost bankrupting the company if it weren't for Clayton. Clayton buys himself into Ewing Oil to save the company and the peace in the family. But now J.R. and Bobby want to get rid of him because it's daddy's company. Clayton likes to keep his shares though because he likes to keep J.R.s dealings in check. This could have gone on for an entire season.

by Anonymousreply 219March 31, 2024 6:47 PM

IIRC Jock wrote in his will that nobody but a Ewing could own a piece of Ewing Oil, so I don't think that Clayton could have done that. Don't know how binding that would actually be.

by Anonymousreply 220March 31, 2024 7:05 PM

R218- You're the Mainwaring boy?

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by Anonymousreply 221March 31, 2024 7:25 PM

R163- You'd think his LESBIAN mother would have raised him better.

by Anonymousreply 222March 31, 2024 7:37 PM

I'm Pam's bolt-ons before bolt-ons became a "thing". I'm pretty much the most interesting aspect of this poorly written character.

by Anonymousreply 223March 31, 2024 8:36 PM

I'm Me.

by Anonymousreply 224April 4, 2024 5:56 PM

I'm the stacked parking at Southfork as if they didn't have enough room for parking. I'm all the people in bit and supporting parts that went on to have roles on Falcon Crest.

by Anonymousreply 225April 4, 2024 6:13 PM

R224- and of course I’m me

by Anonymousreply 226April 4, 2024 6:15 PM

I always thought instead of breaking up Ewing Oil at the end of season 10, the government should have just ordered that Bobby and JR could no longer run it

The family could then turn to Clayton and Donna to run it instead, possibly leading eventually to a Donna/Bobby romance (they always had chemistry). Meanwhile the stress of running Ewing Oil leads to Clayton having a massive heart attack. Miss Ellie could blame JR for this and throw him off Southfork.

While this is going on, JR blackmails his way into controlling the banks used by Barnes -Wentworth and Westar, allowing him to secretly funnel deals to Ewing Oil as he plots to regain control.

by Anonymousreply 227April 4, 2024 9:03 PM

I'm Barbara Eden. The worst stunt casting in history.

by Anonymousreply 228April 4, 2024 10:39 PM

I'm the guy who sells name plates for private office doors. With all that constant upheaval at Ewing Oil, I'm rich!

by Anonymousreply 229April 4, 2024 11:34 PM

I'm JR's shabby ass office for a CEO

by Anonymousreply 230April 4, 2024 11:41 PM

R230- The Southfork house is so ordinary and small-ish for a Billionaire oil family.

by Anonymousreply 231April 5, 2024 3:35 PM

I’m the big increase in the set and costume budget that happens in the 1982-83 and 1983-84 seasons, in response to Dynasty.

Sue Ellen’s mullet! Fashions by Travilla! New Ewing Oil Set! Cliff has a new condo! Southfork has new bedrooms and a new living room! But Miss Ellie is still in her sack dresses and the Krebs’ still live in a shack down the road.

by Anonymousreply 232April 5, 2024 3:47 PM

The original house felt more like an old (if very prosperous) ranch and a home for a wealthy family. But the owner didn't like the attention and then it burned down.

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by Anonymousreply 233April 5, 2024 4:07 PM

I am watching JR and Sue Ellen’s second wedding right now. It is held in the Southfork driveway, like Lucy and Mitch’s wedding, but this episode was shot on location in Texas, so there’s three horses behind the wedding party, shitting away. What a bunch of hicks. The Carringtons would never get married in a driveway.

by Anonymousreply 234April 6, 2024 5:16 AM

[quote] The Carringtons would never get married in a driveway.

No, but we'd fuck the chauffeur in one.

by Anonymousreply 235April 6, 2024 12:30 PM

I'm all the convertible cars being driving around Dallas in the afternoon with the top down. Air conditioning is for wimps.

by Anonymousreply 236April 6, 2024 12:47 PM

I'm Sada Thompson, furious that I lost out on playing Miss Ellie because I was stuck on ABC getting upstaged by Quinn Cummings.

by Anonymousreply 237April 6, 2024 12:49 PM

Was Sada Thompson really a contender for Miss Ellie?

by Anonymousreply 238April 6, 2024 8:11 PM

No r238. But Pam was created for Linda Evans, and they wanted Robert Foxworth to play HR.

by Anonymousreply 239April 6, 2024 8:24 PM

Linda was too old to be Pam. She was perfect for Krystal in Dynasty.

Foxworth would have been an interesting JR.

by Anonymousreply 240April 6, 2024 8:29 PM

I do remember reading Dallas was referred to in the development stages as Untitled Linda Evans Project.

by Anonymousreply 241April 6, 2024 8:31 PM

It's here... this is a really interesting read in its entirety...

David Paulsen: David Jacobs is one of my closest friends. We have lunch every week. I saw him yesterday. He didn’t know the first thing about Texas.

David Jacobs: I remembered this big billboard there that said “Ewing Buick.” I liked that name, Ewing. After the meeting, I went home and wrote a twelve-page backstory set on a Texas ranch, a saga about the Ewings and the Barneses.

David Paulsen: His structure, which was wonderful, was Romeo and Juliet [Bobby Ewing and Pamela Barnes] and Cain and Abel [J. R. and Bobby].

David Jacobs: Lorimar was very enthusiastic about the backstory, and they said, “We have [the actor] Linda Evans under contract; we’re looking for something for her.” So I wrote a script over Thanksgiving weekend 1977, and when I finished it, I put “Untitled Linda Evans Project” on the cover. Then Michael called me and said, “ ‘Untitled’ doesn’t sound good. It sounds like you don’t know what the hell you’re doing.” I asked him what he’d call it, and he said, “Dallas.” And I said, “Dallas? Kennedy was killed in Dallas. Well . . . at least they won the Super Bowl.”

Matt Zoller Seitz is the television critic for New York magazine and grew up in Dallas while the show was airing: Let’s just say that the makers of Dallas weren’t really big on doing homework. There were not herds of cattle tracing across Grand Prairie, and there weren’t fields of oil wells outside Dallas. It bore about as much relation to life in actual Dallas as Lost in Space did to the history of space exploration.

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by Anonymousreply 242April 6, 2024 8:37 PM

Just finished it... it's a great insight into everything about the show...

by Anonymousreply 243April 6, 2024 8:55 PM

^ Not THAT interesting.

by Anonymousreply 244April 6, 2024 10:14 PM

Linda Evans could have been Sue Ellen.

by Anonymousreply 245April 6, 2024 10:50 PM

When the show first started, Sue Ellen was a nothing character. The show was about Bobby and Pam. Then Larry Hagman stole it away and eventually they figured a neurotic, drunk wife would be a good addition to the cast. I doubt the producers would have offered the role to Evans nor that she would have wanted it based on the original concept. And, FWIW, I don't think Evans would have made a good Sue Ellen at all. Evans couldn't even pull off "Rita" on Dynasty.

by Anonymousreply 246April 7, 2024 12:38 AM

Linda Gray isn’t in the credits in the miniseries. It was her reactions to what was going on that convinced the producers to make her a leading character.

And the original idea was for Bobby to die and for a widowed Pam to be fighting JR.

by Anonymousreply 247April 7, 2024 12:52 AM

Pam battling J.R.? LOL. She had great tits but not much else.

by Anonymousreply 248April 7, 2024 12:54 AM

Pam was a lightweight

by Anonymousreply 249April 7, 2024 12:59 AM

[quote] Linda Gray isn’t in the credits in the miniseries. It was her reactions to what was going on that convinced the producers to make her a leading character.

This is a bit of a mystery to me. It's a family saga with parents, sons and daughters-in-law all living in the same house. Why would one of the wives not get a main credit? Did they really believe this character could stay a recurring role? I know Linda Gray got the job as a favor for her husband, and her acting wasn't highly regarded during the mini-series. Did they consider recasting her or let her die or divorce after the mini-series would be renewed for a full season? Either way, I'm obviously glad they kept her. Sue Ellen became one of the best soap characters ever, in part thanks to Linda Gray's many outstanding performances.

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by Anonymousreply 250April 7, 2024 4:39 AM

The headline cast for the first season was small - Bobby and Pam, his parents, JR, and Lucy.

by Anonymousreply 251April 7, 2024 5:32 AM

Sue Ellen shooting daggers at JR after the whole Brian Dennehy barging into Southfork episode prompted the writers to expand Sue Ellen.

by Anonymousreply 252April 7, 2024 5:52 AM

Brian Dennehy was also on early Dynasty

by Anonymousreply 253April 7, 2024 6:08 AM

I'm the glass of white wine that Miss Ellie orders any time she goes out to have lunch with Pam, Sue Ellen, Rebecca, etc.

by Anonymousreply 254April 7, 2024 6:23 AM

I’m the king sized bed in Holly Harwood’s office. The burly Chippendales dancer Holly hired changes my sheets.

by Anonymousreply 255April 8, 2024 4:00 AM

Holly's bed in her office and the male secretaries were a nice tough.

The one I loved more than anyone was Marilee Stone; she stole every scene she was ever in unless she was with Larry or Linda.

by Anonymousreply 256April 8, 2024 4:33 AM

I'm a typical gay male in that my favorite female character on Dallas was also the MEANEST/NASTIEST/BITCHIEST

Katherine Wentworth

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by Anonymousreply 257April 8, 2024 4:40 AM

R247 Gray said there was no character to start with. She flew into Texas for the first time, and because her part was relatively minor she decided to start mingling with the high society Dallas women to get to know them better, she went into their stores and hairdressers.

One night in the ladies' room at a black-tie function she peeked into the woman's handbag next to her and saw a lipstick and tiny gun. Linda had never seen a real gun before.

She asked "Is that a gun?!" and the woman replied "Of course, darlin'. This is Texas!"

Linda thought it was fabulous and fell in love with the character of Sue Ellen.

by Anonymousreply 258April 8, 2024 4:42 AM

It was amusing how Sue Ellen was the snobby one in the beginning, obsessed with breeding and appearances, and she’s the messiest bitch of them all.

by Anonymousreply 259April 8, 2024 5:20 PM

Why doesn't anyone talk about Muriel? She steals every scene she's in! Wasn't there a Muriel like her in Bye Bye Birdie?

by Anonymousreply 260April 8, 2024 8:11 PM

Krystal was created for Elizabeth Montgomery. She backed out at the last minute.

by Anonymousreply 261April 8, 2024 8:15 PM

Angie Dickinson turned down Krystle and Sable Colby.

by Anonymousreply 262April 8, 2024 8:23 PM

Montgomery simply didn't want the grind of another weekly. She would have been more interesting as Alexis. The whole tone of the show would have changed with her. Forsythe wouldn't have been able to steamroll her character. However unintentional it might be. Back to you Dallas. Sorry

by Anonymousreply 263April 8, 2024 8:29 PM

R261 - Liz was getting up in years then.

by Anonymousreply 264April 8, 2024 9:02 PM

I agree. Plus she was the type that at that age she didn't seem to care about keeping herself up. She was happy playing that Edna lady and all her TV movies. I suspect once she went through the glamor reworking for Dynasty she would have made Evans look like a dog. Anyway, that's more than rumor. It's pretty well documented about the part being written with her in mind. That and her last minute backing out which made her no friends.

by Anonymousreply 265April 9, 2024 2:35 AM

Liz would have been great as Alexis.

by Anonymousreply 266April 9, 2024 3:03 AM

R24 They should have had a better house. Once DYNASTY started I looked down my nose at the Ewings. I'm with the Carrington's now. Beat it, cowpoke.

by Anonymousreply 267April 9, 2024 3:11 AM

That's nothing I could have afforded to live on Knots Landing.

by Anonymousreply 268April 9, 2024 3:12 AM

The clean lines of the new Southfork just worked for the show. The fact these people were money without breeding was something people could not resist. The house sitting high on the empty plain made it look imposing and much bigger than reality. They took a chance on less being more, usually the opposite is true.

by Anonymousreply 269April 9, 2024 3:30 AM

R269 If worked for sure. It kept them greedy to want more.

by Anonymousreply 270April 9, 2024 3:32 AM

I’m Andy Gibb crying my eyes out and snorting my fortune up my nose.

by Anonymousreply 271April 9, 2024 3:43 AM

I'm April Stevens. The most interesting and charismatic character on the show. Too bad they didn't know what to do with me.

by Anonymousreply 272April 9, 2024 3:47 AM

R126, ewwwwwwwwwwww

that said, I thought JR's ultimate revenge on Peter would have been having him kidnapped and blindfolded and then, JR could have had his way with him.

by Anonymousreply 273April 9, 2024 4:04 AM

I'm Lucy's panties always wadded up in a ball in a corner with blood and poop stains all over them

by Anonymousreply 274April 9, 2024 4:09 AM

I COULDN'T REACH THE TOILET! Give a gal a break.

by Anonymousreply 275April 9, 2024 4:12 AM

R265 - Seems the whole cast of Dynasty was comprised of second (or lower) choices. The original Blake was to be George Peppard (who either quit or was fired due to alcoholism and his on-set assholishness) while the original Alexis was intended to be Sophia Loren who wanted primo lira for the role. The producers looked at nearly every 50+ actress with a modicum of celebrity before finally settling on Joan Collins -- who was fresh from the set of "Empire of the Ants" and other B flicks.

by Anonymousreply 276April 9, 2024 12:10 PM

Not my part!

by Anonymousreply 277April 9, 2024 1:04 PM

R269- JR was a sleeze and Jock came across as low class too. Only Miss Ellie had some class.

by Anonymousreply 278April 9, 2024 1:07 PM

Dallas - November 21, 1980.

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by Anonymousreply 279April 9, 2024 2:33 PM

You were a doll Pamela. The show died when you left.

by Anonymousreply 280April 9, 2024 5:03 PM

I think Joan Collins was perfectly cast. Sophia Loren was a bigger name, but I don’t think she could have come as well as Joan.

They also lucked out in finding young and mostly unknown Heather Locklear as Krystal’s niece.

by Anonymousreply 281April 9, 2024 5:24 PM

Again hate to distract from Dallas. I'm sure there's 1,000 Dynasty threads. Anyway, what the fuck was going through their minds when casting Emma Samms? Plus I know her reviews are mixed with fans but they should have never let Catherine Oxenberg go. I think she added quite a spark to the show.

by Anonymousreply 282April 9, 2024 5:28 PM

I think Tori watched daytime soaps like GH; she saw Emma's beauty and Emma is a truly nice person but dear God in heaven, she's second only to John Bolger in terms of horrible recasts.

BOTH would have been fine in other roles, but Fallon season 1 Dynasty was brlliant; biting the head off the bride on the cake? Telling Krystle the wedding wasn't going to happen till she signed the prenup. "No. It's not a gift." response to Krystle about helping her with living in Blake's world.

by Anonymousreply 283April 9, 2024 5:40 PM

I'm the Dallas thread. I've been driven off the road with talk of Dynasty and Emma Samms.

by Anonymousreply 284April 9, 2024 7:42 PM

I just finished watching season 6, which is my favorite season. Jock’s will and the fight between Bobby and JR slowly encompass everyone’s storyline.

Pam is stronger than she’s been in years, standing up to Bobby, JR and Cliff. Ray isn’t moping around feeling inadequate. Lucy has her only interesting romance, with Mickey (who never should have been killed off). And you see that JR loves Sue Ellen but can’t help himself, he is incapable of monogamy.

I just wish they hadn’t killed off Rebecca. A Rebecca/Clayton/Ellie triangle would have added depth to the Barnes/Ewing feud. And I wanted to see where Katherine’s bitchiness came from.

by Anonymousreply 285April 9, 2024 7:56 PM

I'm the Dallas/Dynasty cross over event that should have happened.

Plot ideas? Steven Carrington and Mickey Trotter meet up and begin a torrid affair, while Alexis goes after Sue Ellen's speedo clad boy toy. Blake and Miss Ellie turn out to be siblings and she invites him over for iced tea.

by Anonymousreply 286April 9, 2024 8:00 PM

r12 Cousin in law

by Anonymousreply 287April 9, 2024 8:03 PM

I'm Pams super tight jeans and big breasts

by Anonymousreply 288April 9, 2024 8:07 PM

I’m one of Miss Ellies house dresses.....it saved the shows wardrobe budget a fortune

by Anonymousreply 289April 9, 2024 8:08 PM

r62 Yes he was very yummy!

by Anonymousreply 290April 9, 2024 8:11 PM

Speaking of Mickey Trotter, Timothy Patrick Murphy was so hot. His Wikipedia page says he was in a relationship with Mark Patton, star of Nightmare on Elm Street 2. Is that true? They must have made a hot 80's couple! What a tragedy that he died at 29.

by Anonymousreply 291April 9, 2024 8:29 PM

I'm Lucy's friend Muriel Gillis. I was the Dollar Store version of Jamie Rose or one of those red headed Walton girls.

by Anonymousreply 292April 9, 2024 8:32 PM

Muriel always look appalled or scandalized. My favorite is when Ray calls looking for Lucy, who didn’t come home the night JR was shot.

She had this tense, scared look on her face, like she knew Lucy had shot JR. In fact, Lucy was in a sleazy motel fucking her married professor.

by Anonymousreply 293April 9, 2024 11:24 PM

r285, I agree, those seasons when Jock was missing/died and the next season when the sons fought for Ewing Oil were really epic. All characters were fleshed out just right, all stories were connected to the main arc. Everything just worked. As sad as Jim Davis' death was, they really knew how to milk that opportunity.

Speaking about Jock. When you think about it, he was really just J. R.'s door mat. He appeared all crusty and macho, but J.R. was constantly lying in his face, and Jock was always gullible enough to believe. Bobby always had to call out the lies that Jock so happily believed.

by Anonymousreply 294April 10, 2024 3:40 AM

There is this publicity photo of the Barnes/Wentworth family that is quite remarkable. It's Rebecca with her three kids. But they were really never together like this. When Rebecca was still around, Katherine was just in two, maybe three episodes - and not really bad yet. Only once Rebecca had died did she become a regular and a baddie.

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by Anonymousreply 295April 10, 2024 3:44 AM

R295- She was a bitch from day one. She never liked Cliff almost from the first time she met him because Rebecca had allowed Cliff to take over Wentworth Tool And Die which was her father's first company.

by Anonymousreply 296April 10, 2024 3:49 AM

I'm Sue Ellen and Pam's "friendship", just shy of a tampon commercial or a soft lesbo hookup.

by Anonymousreply 297April 10, 2024 4:04 AM

I'm the ice cubes Sue Ellen always rattled around in her glass when she was drinking.

by Anonymousreply 298April 10, 2024 4:13 AM

I'm Miss Ellie's bike riding!

by Anonymousreply 299April 10, 2024 4:20 AM

R286, I agree about Rebecca

Priscilla Pointer, ironically, is still alive

by Anonymousreply 300April 10, 2024 5:06 AM

I'm the Pledge of Allegiance, recited at the beginning of the Texas Oil Commission meeting.

by Anonymousreply 301April 10, 2024 5:10 AM

I'm the Pledge of Allegiance, recited at the beginning of the Texas Oil Commission meeting.

by Anonymousreply 302April 10, 2024 5:10 AM

^ 4th grade?

by Anonymousreply 303April 10, 2024 5:11 AM

I'm NBC's wishful thinking that our new daytime soap "Texas" will piggy-back off the success of "Dallas". I'll last less than three years.

by Anonymousreply 304April 10, 2024 12:13 PM

But I made some money.

by Anonymousreply 305April 10, 2024 4:37 PM

4H - Head, Heart, Hands and something else. Health?

by Anonymousreply 306April 10, 2024 4:39 PM

I'm Rebecca Wentworth's houscoats and nightclothes. She was wealthy so why was she dressed like a black mammy washerwoman?

by Anonymousreply 307April 10, 2024 6:16 PM

That's how I'd dress if I didn't have to work.

by Anonymousreply 308April 10, 2024 6:32 PM

I'm bourbon and branch. Sly will pour you a glass of me if you have a meeting with ol' JR.

by Anonymousreply 309April 10, 2024 6:55 PM

I am Texas Stadium, old home of the Dallas Cowboy and always featured at the opening

Now, if this was RL and Ewing Oil was still in business, I’d now be called Ewing Stadium

by Anonymousreply 310April 10, 2024 6:56 PM

I'm really not an alcoholic.

by Anonymousreply 311April 10, 2024 6:57 PM

I am the yellow Mercury Colony Park station wagon haphazardly parked on the side of the road a mile from Southfork, with a pregnant Sue Ellen slumped over the steering wheel, passed out drunk.

by Anonymousreply 312April 10, 2024 7:03 PM

Yes I am, R311, and proud of it!

by Anonymousreply 313April 10, 2024 11:56 PM

I'm Afton Cooper, kissin's about the fifth best thing I do.

So that leaves: 1. blowjobs; 2. anal; 3. rimming; and 4. front hole fucking.

by Anonymousreply 314April 11, 2024 12:42 AM

Who did Jenilee Harrison fuck to get this gig? To go from fighting the ironing board once a week to Dallas was a weird jump.

by Anonymousreply 315April 11, 2024 12:44 AM

I'm Audrey Landers' tits which weren't that big. She got what she paid for.

by Anonymousreply 316April 11, 2024 2:14 AM

I'm outer office Kendall. Those uppity bitches Sly and Phyllis think they're so much better than me.

by Anonymousreply 317April 11, 2024 3:06 AM

I'm all the members of Miss Ellie's society group loosely based on Daughters of the American Revolution. Our meetings consist of gin-soaked cattiness. We're also brazenly racist, even though we all know we secretly want to be gangbanged by the Mexican busboys.

by Anonymousreply 318April 11, 2024 11:54 AM

I'm the secret true nature of the decades-long rivalry between Jock and Digger which was not over Miss Ellie, but rather that long-ago weekend of curious experimentation we shared in Odessa that shall never be spoken of again.

by Anonymousreply 319April 11, 2024 12:00 PM

I'm the mechanic who last worked on Jock's ill-fated helicopter. J.R. was very generous.

by Anonymousreply 320April 11, 2024 12:01 PM

I'm Gary. As a teenager, I knocked up that white trash simpleton Valene Clements just to prove to everyone I wasn't one of THOSE people. It really wasn't worth the effort.

by Anonymousreply 321April 11, 2024 12:03 PM

I'm Michele Lee in 1978 wondering what happened to all those fabulous variety shows on television in favor of this new tawdry trash that nobody will ever watch. I'm a Broadway baby and would never be found dead slumming on a nighttime soap opera.

by Anonymousreply 322April 11, 2024 12:09 PM

I'm Ewing 23, the most problematic of the Ewing wells.

by Anonymousreply 323April 11, 2024 12:40 PM

I'm Martin E. Brooks. No fembots allowed at Ewing Oil.

by Anonymousreply 324April 11, 2024 4:19 PM

I'm the Southfork gym, which showed up late in the series to give Sasha Mitchell screen time showing off his muscles.

by Anonymousreply 325April 11, 2024 6:25 PM

I'm the bulge of Dack Rambo.



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by Anonymousreply 326April 11, 2024 6:52 PM

I'm Philip Capice. You will see my name flashed first on the screen just after a cliffhanger completes.

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by Anonymousreply 327April 11, 2024 6:53 PM

I’m the lazy writing of the departures of Clayton, Miss Ellie, Lucy, Ray and Jenna.

I can’t be bothered to say specifically where these characters went, so I just say “they’re in Europe.”

Why not move Ray and Jenna to a big ranch in the Rockies or something? I can’t see him hanging out at the Eiffel Tower or Leaning Tower of Pisa.

by Anonymousreply 328April 11, 2024 6:55 PM

I'm downtown Dallas. I am unoriginal, uninspiring, uninviting and just plain boring. All my architects and urban planners went on to other careers.

by Anonymousreply 329April 12, 2024 2:57 AM

I'm Reunion Tower. I'm often featured in the background during the Dallas location shoots.

by Anonymousreply 330April 12, 2024 3:16 AM

I'm the Dallas Tourist Board. We're delighted that our city is mostly remembered for this TV show rather than that unpleasantness in 1963.

by Anonymousreply 331April 12, 2024 12:10 PM

I’m the 8 year old gayling who sneaks downstairs after my parents have gone to bed to watch THE BEST SHOW EVER!!!!

by Anonymousreply 332April 12, 2024 12:17 PM

Same, R332. Same age too.

by Anonymousreply 333April 12, 2024 2:05 PM

I'm most of the fans who knew from the second the shot was fired that it was going to be Kristin.

by Anonymousreply 334April 12, 2024 5:29 PM

I'm glad "most of the fans" didn't ruin it for the rest of us.

by Anonymousreply 335April 12, 2024 5:31 PM

I'm the gayling so disappointed for the first three episodes of the following season that it looked like SueEllen shot JR. Because I just couldn't imagine life (or the show) without SueEllen lookin' at the world through the bottom of a glass. Because I was a gayling.

by Anonymousreply 336April 12, 2024 9:16 PM

I'm the first hurt, which is the worst hurt of all.

by Anonymousreply 337April 12, 2024 11:32 PM

I'm the rouge Sue Ellen applies while she and JR discuss if they will have time to visit the newly incinerated Pam in the hospital.

by Anonymousreply 338April 13, 2024 2:04 AM

Im the oddly phallic shaped bottle JR has hidden in his room.

by Anonymousreply 339April 13, 2024 2:38 AM

I’m the $5million Jock Ewing put in a Swiss bank account in 1963 to pay the Cubans to blow JFK’s head off.

by Anonymousreply 340April 13, 2024 2:55 AM

I'm JR'S bourbon farts!

by Anonymousreply 341April 13, 2024 3:16 AM

I'm the club soda Sue Ellen really is drinking.

by Anonymousreply 342April 13, 2024 5:30 AM

I'm the puppy dog that JR was going to buy Sue Ellen when she told him she wanted a baby.

by Anonymousreply 343April 13, 2024 5:30 AM

I'm Sly's brother who got paroled no thanks to Cliff Barnes and all his connectins.

by Anonymousreply 344April 13, 2024 5:31 AM

I'm the Tundra Torque that Bobby used to plow through the icy Canadian frozen land. Pam signed off on Bobby getting to use it.

I thought he was going to give HER the Tundra Torque treatment out of gratitude.

by Anonymousreply 345April 13, 2024 5:33 AM

I'm John Beck's mustache.

by Anonymousreply 346April 13, 2024 5:19 PM

^ I rode that mustache!

by Anonymousreply 347April 13, 2024 6:24 PM

Everything Pam rode eventually exploded.

by Anonymousreply 348April 13, 2024 6:30 PM

Well then I am John Beck's hairy chest.

by Anonymousreply 349April 13, 2024 6:30 PM

I'm Lucy's ABORTION!!!

by Anonymousreply 350April 13, 2024 8:16 PM

I'm the first reunion movie, J.R. Returns. Not the crappy second one, War of the Ewing. But we were both ignored when the new series came along.

by Anonymousreply 351April 13, 2024 9:25 PM

I'm the exploding dam in the opening credits. I don't know what I've got to do with anything, but I definitely liven things up.

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by Anonymousreply 352April 13, 2024 9:37 PM

I'm Dack Rambo. I sure hope my new TV show "Sword of Justice" slaughters that new primetime soap "Dallas"! It's "Fantasy Island" that worries me....

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by Anonymousreply 353April 14, 2024 3:41 AM

I'm the missing spin of one of the actresses in the opening credits.

by Anonymousreply 354April 14, 2024 4:20 AM

Susan, that was pretty classic -- and your idea, I hear.

Are you going to the Another World reunion in May?

by Anonymousreply 355April 14, 2024 5:14 AM

As originally created for the screen, it was more of an event.

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by Anonymousreply 356April 14, 2024 1:43 PM

Bitch Samms couldn't even do a proper spin.

by Anonymousreply 357April 14, 2024 4:58 PM

I'm Mitch! I'm totally pointless and only exist to tell my midget wife how much I resent her wealth.

by Anonymousreply 358April 14, 2024 7:15 PM

I'm Leigh McCloskey and I was blond eye candy that kept horny girls and gays tuning in, no matter how lame my character was.

by Anonymousreply 359April 14, 2024 8:15 PM

Jock spoiling Lucy made her think all she had to do was want Mitch and it would all work out.

She should have left him for good after making her OWN MONEY as Young Miss Dallas.

by Anonymousreply 360April 14, 2024 9:12 PM

Mitch was an annoying scold. The character was poorly acted and written. I didn’t understand how a schemer like Afton could be his sister, especially since their mother also liked getting free shit from the Ewings. And how does someone who was raised in Biloxi, Mississippi and living in Dallas not have an accent? Afton had the same issue.

by Anonymousreply 361April 14, 2024 9:49 PM

HI! I'm Cally!

by Anonymousreply 362April 14, 2024 9:51 PM

Go back to your holler down in Arkansas, Cally at R362.

by Anonymousreply 363April 14, 2024 10:33 PM

I’ve never been a fan of the Mitch-type character who seemed to pop up on almost shows — self-righteous and indignantly threatened by a woman and her access to money/power.

by Anonymousreply 364April 14, 2024 10:49 PM

I'm poor old Rose, one of the later season Dallas whores. I had to toil under Carter McKay's giant belly. 🤮

by Anonymousreply 365April 14, 2024 10:54 PM

R359 - "Mitch Cooper: The Other Side of Dallas"

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by Anonymousreply 366April 14, 2024 10:54 PM

I'm Christopher Atkins' career, starting to suspect that I've peaked.

by Anonymousreply 367April 14, 2024 10:58 PM

I'm Susan Flannery. Thinking I can finally give a fuck you to daytime.

by Anonymousreply 368April 14, 2024 11:08 PM

I am Clayton Farlow. I am the one male character who got weaker and weaker with time. I had more run ins with JR and yet nobody remembers me.

by Anonymousreply 369April 15, 2024 12:06 AM

R366- That actor never seemed straight to me.

by Anonymousreply 370April 15, 2024 2:34 AM
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