I notice that I a becoming such an asshole and I want to stop.

Does your condo smell like farts too?

When I had to work with the public I had to deal with all kinds of shit and ended up really disliking people in general now. I’m fortunate I can be more of a hermit now. I feel you, OP.

OP -- I want to hear the rest of the story. You know--the part where the truck driver got out of his truck, dragged you into an alley and gave you the best fuck of your life.

R1 = troll

I think it's natural when you get older and live in a large city like New York. Your tolerance threshold becomes much lower. Find a way to deal with all the excess stimuli. It's ok to stay home if that's where you're comfortable.

People have become so outrageous (and totally entitled) that it is going to be a career ender for me.

OP - can we have your stuff when someone pulls out a gun and mows you down?

You’re not an asshole, you have anxiety and it’s making you act like an asshole.

True ashield aren’t that self-aware.

OP sounds like you live in a big city like New York City. That place drove me nuts even in my early 30s! Too noisy! Too many people! Too expensive! Too smelly! Maybe you’re getting extra sensitive as you’re getting older. Or maybe you haven’t taken a vacation in a long time? Maybe you’re just burnt out? Perhaps try some meditation or some breathing techniques? Anyway, I wish you well!

True assholes*^

MARY!

natural aging phenomenon, just not putting up with anyone else's shit anymore

now its time to work on the phoney "kill them with kindness" act - and you have to be convincing

OP, please be careful. I used to be a sarcastic asshole until I realized it might get me killed (I'm in NYC). Learn to ignore stupidity like I have. It's just not worth it.

I believe we have long been conditioned to be insufferable assholes courtesy of the television sitcom which endeavors to make the attitude palatable courtesy of a willing live studio audience. I personally blame Carla from “Cheers!” Surely there had to have been some tapings where someone stood up and cried “that’s over the line, Carla!” Instead, sitcoms are now infested by entire casts of characters who do nothing but cruelly call one another out, put one another down. Everyone is made to feel inferior with uproarious laughter as the backdrop. Now we live in a world where Carla’s dismembered limbs and torso would be found throughout the neighborhood trash bins of Boston and amidst the horror of this, knee jerk wisecracks as a first response.

r4, r1 is just being r1.

R15 & R4 - I believe R1 is referring to another thread on DL from a few weeks ago where someone was complaining that his home smelled like farts because of a roommate or boyfriend. I can't remember which.

R12 is right. You become troll-like with age. If we lived long enough, we’d probably morph into mushroom creatures. Sentient fungus.

you might just be unhappy or stressed for various other reasons and displacing those emotions. if you were happy with the rest of your life outside of those moments of frustration you probably wouldn't be sent off the edge like that. it's okay. you don't seem like an asshole because you're recognizing it and not blaming others.

I picture OP doing this to the truck driver.

Control your instincts, OP-especially if you live in the US, an insane country full of insane people with an insane amount of firearms at their disposal.

You could invite the neighborhood kids to play on your lawn.

Sounds like industrialized human disease. Driving a truck is an incredibly tough job. I did it for a while and never have looked at truck drivers the same way. I once had a job as a cook. It was really hard. I have never looked at cooks the same. Running a restaurant is a really hard job. What you have is a lack of empathy because you are burnt out. Maybe it’s time for a change. Have you a vision for your life something you always wanted to do. A place you want to see.

Just smoke copious amounts of pot, silly!

Eventually - you'll become a total cunt OP. Especially on DL. It's just part of getting older and becoming more knowledgeable, experienced and aware. That's a polite way of saying what R12 said. I especially agree that much of it's about not putting up with other people shit.

I disagree, r23. I’m becoming more tolerant and less quick to anger as I age.

Of course, it might be dementia.

You’d be far more of an asshole if you weren’t even aware that you chose a less-than-optimum response. It is all to your credit that you noticed and wished you’d chosen better. That in itself will save you if you can just move the recognition time up a few seconds earlier than you did this time and choose the less regrettable one next time.

OP I was just saying to my husband that I am becoming a meaner curmudgeon every day. I hate being anywhere with the public. I find that people are aloof, and shallow and vague- by that I mean they either don’t know themselves or don’t care or both. I was a public defender for years. But my disgust with the human race really started because of the bigotry and bullying I encountered along the way to me trying to be a decent, kind human. The criminal defense clients drove me crazy because their real problems had nothing to do with their crimes, and I couldn’t solve them but had to endure them in order to represent them. I feel like I am nastier, quicker to anger, and far more prone to keeping the company of a few people- usually family. I know why people become hermits. And I don’t disagree. Also social media has made people feel freer to just be mean, even in person.

I had something similar happen to me today, with somebody pulled so far beyond the stop line into the intersection, in a failed bid to turn left, that she blocked the intersection. Part of it is idiotic bike lanes, shoved according to ideology not sensible planning, and sitting empty. I have to get out of the city and leave progress to its fate. I'm a cunt, but not this big.

OP, I’m glad you recognise your treatment of the truck driver is an issue. Pull back and think - what will you get out of it? Nothing.

I remind myself every day that 99% of the population isn’t out to get me nor are they trying to sabotage my life. I also think of the many things I screw up, be it in the car or outside, and I am grateful for those who didn’t immediately make a scene.

That puts things in perspective, OPee

here, doll

you can thank me later

That's my retirement plan, R30!

OP, I have heard a lot of medical experts on radio and podcasts saying that this is a very common post-Covid reaction. Not to having the disease, to having been through the pandemic. It's a combination of having been bored and frustrated, and a bit of PTSD.

OP I share your sentiment. I too have become mean since returning to the office and having to take the subway. These last few months have broken me. I used to be a caring, smiling at strangers type. Now since returning to work in person I fucking hate everyone. I often sport the most bitchy of bitch faces one can imagine when riding the subway.

Note to straights: , it is not contagious and I do not want to fuck you

[quote]It's a combination of being bored and frustrated and a little bit of PTSD.

Sure, Jan.

[quote]I’m becoming more tolerant and less quick to anger as I age.

I'm in agreement with R24, but I'm also about 20 years older than OP. When in my 40s, I had to do a certain amount of buffering: allowing more time to get somewhere, taking a philosophical approach where a wrench was thrown into the works, asserting myself when interruptions affected work deadlines, trying to consider everyone else's perspective in any situation, realizing that a good day or a bad day is the sum of selected moments - or rather my interpretation and handling of them. I relearned to take a breath before reacting to some things, to give a moment of consideration. You can fall out of the practice, easily.

Also, life has to be something better than work, and when it is, the other things fall more easily into place.

I don't hate the public, but at 71 I have become acutely aware of how brainless and ignorant so many have become. I once thought I'd never see such a dumbing down of general public intelligence during my lifetime. But it has happened and won't turn around before I'm long dead. I've leaned I have to just block it out and treasure the interactions I have with people who are actually intelligent, which are becoming fewer and fewer. I keep interactions with those I consider morons as short as possible.

r36 I could have written that and I'm 44.

Sounds more like the OP is stressed or anxious about something else and is taking it out on others.

Like someone else said, actual assholes don't think they're assholes, nor would they ever feel any guilt for it.

OP- Thank you for speaking up for the other 50 people who had to walk in traffic. You told a selfish asshole that he's a selfish asshole? What's the problem? 38 responses and no screaming about the LAW BREAKING CRIMINAL who is not permitted to block the intersection?

That driver should be ticketed and receive points on his license and reported to his company. I wish people were as outraged about the car driving criminals as the deodorant robbing/bus fare beating thug on the street.