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Would you lick a straight man’s ass?

A colleague of mine who is 28 years old (I am 25) and whom I hangout with quite a lot casually asked me that one weekend at my house. He has a wife and they recently had a child and apparently the woman has not slept with him for 5 months and that made him hire a slut once. We’ve been good friends and work bestie for two years and it just feels weird with him asking it although he is damn hot and attractive (he’s square jawed, blonde with blue eyes and is moderately muscular and great athletic body of a footballer and 6 feet tall). He told me that he’s seen men getting rimmed several times on porn and wants to try it out once and apparently the slut he hired did it without putting in an effort and not more than a second. He said he could suck my nipples in return (I have a totally shaved and smooth twink short and thin body) but he wouldn’t want to see my dick (which is fine as I’m totally a complete bottom) but would like for me to suck him (he wants to watch straight porn while I do that). The thing is, I have a boyfriend but I also don’t wanna let go of this once in a lifetime offer! What should I be doing?

by Anonymousreply 88February 14, 2024 8:32 PM

Try Substack

by Anonymousreply 1February 11, 2024 5:56 PM

Sure, why not? But make him look at your puny little cocklet anyway. It'll do him some good.

by Anonymousreply 2February 11, 2024 5:58 PM

They don't have that great of hygiene back there. BTDT

by Anonymousreply 3February 11, 2024 6:01 PM

Sure, go ahead. He will overreact as though you had invented oxygen or something.

by Anonymousreply 4February 11, 2024 6:03 PM

Why didn't you warn him and told him to get a vasectomy? Then you two wouldn't be in the situation you are now. Karma.

by Anonymousreply 5February 11, 2024 6:04 PM

R3 What makes you say that? But now that you mentioned it, I’m wondering if that’s the reason why the slut didn’t do it for more than a minute. But what I’m concerned is my boyfriend. I’ve never really cheated on him before and we are monogamous.

R2 I don’t think he’d be okay with that. In any case, I don’t care wearing a jockstrap.

by Anonymousreply 6February 11, 2024 6:04 PM

How old is your boyfriend, OP?

by Anonymousreply 7February 11, 2024 6:05 PM

R3, can you care to elaborate?

by Anonymousreply 8February 11, 2024 6:06 PM

R7, my boyfriend is the same age as me.

by Anonymousreply 9February 11, 2024 6:06 PM

r8 I tried not to offend him but I got a baby wipe and used it on him before I did it. He was tall and handsome, otherwise his hygiene was good but straight guys don't keep it clean back there.

by Anonymousreply 10February 11, 2024 6:10 PM

If he’s cute and it’s clean.

Then yes.

by Anonymousreply 11February 11, 2024 6:13 PM

R11, I think by the time I find out whether he’s clean or not I think it’d be too late. He’s extremely handsome and good looking though.

by Anonymousreply 12February 11, 2024 6:14 PM


To answer your question, I've done it before and will do again for the right guy.

by Anonymousreply 13February 11, 2024 6:14 PM

I will do just about anything, except I draw the line at licking anyone's ass.

by Anonymousreply 14February 11, 2024 6:14 PM

0/10 OP…the 6’ blond description was a bit over the top, don’t you think?

by Anonymousreply 15February 11, 2024 6:17 PM

Do it! Do it!

Take a secret video too, and post it.

by Anonymousreply 16February 11, 2024 6:18 PM

R15, not really, I’m a Japanese guy who works in Finland. It’s actually quite common here.

by Anonymousreply 17February 11, 2024 6:19 PM

R13 and R16, I just don’t want my boyfriend to ever find out about it.

by Anonymousreply 18February 11, 2024 6:20 PM

R18, what he doesn't know won't hurt him. ;)

by Anonymousreply 19February 11, 2024 6:22 PM

Why hello Jan! Long time no see!

by Anonymousreply 20February 11, 2024 6:23 PM

R18, you’re totally right on that. 😂

by Anonymousreply 21February 11, 2024 6:25 PM

This **straight** guy is all it takes for you to cheat?

by Anonymousreply 22February 11, 2024 6:28 PM

Don't listen to R22. We don't do frau-y monogamy here.😂

by Anonymousreply 23February 11, 2024 6:30 PM

Young gaylings and their monogamy always crack me up - as if they have to preserve the sanctity of their marital bed to keep bloodlines pure. Men don't show love through sex - although sex with someone you love can be hot, or boring as hell, depending.

And OP, that is why you start off in the shower. Tell him you want to watch him get naked and shower, and then you soap up and clean his ass and hole yourself. If you're gonna stick your tongue down there, a soapy finger is nothing - especially if it insures you'll both enjoy it.

by Anonymousreply 24February 11, 2024 6:30 PM

I only lick straight men’s asses.

by Anonymousreply 25February 11, 2024 6:31 PM

Close you legs to married men!

by Anonymousreply 26February 11, 2024 6:33 PM

R24 You have a point out there actually. About the showering part, I’m not sure he’d be up for it but it’s of course worth trying.

by Anonymousreply 27February 11, 2024 6:35 PM

I only open my legs to married men.

by Anonymousreply 28February 11, 2024 6:35 PM

R25, really? Why is that thought? And you don’t mind if they may not be the cleanest? I’ve heard so many gays say that straight men are apparently not the cleanest back there.

by Anonymousreply 29February 11, 2024 6:36 PM

Sexual gratification from anal stimulation is purely physiological and not based on sexuality. There are probably more straight men, numerically speaking, than gay men in the world who would get off on getting their holes played with. But I would imagine about only 1% of them will find someone willing to do it. The internet is causing more and more straight men to turn to gay buddies or acquaintances to experience the stuff they think they know how to do the best. I have played with a couple of married holes in my day, and boy is it a game changer for them.

by Anonymousreply 30February 11, 2024 6:36 PM

Go for it OP. Don’t be singing Katy Perry’s ‘The One That Got Away’ 20 years down the road. Let us know how it goes.

by Anonymousreply 31February 11, 2024 6:37 PM

R29 I’m not attracted to gay ass.

by Anonymousreply 32February 11, 2024 6:37 PM

R30, True true! But I’m just wondering why people here keep saying that straight men are dirty. R31, True! Maybe I should just not let my bf know about this and deal with it myself.

by Anonymousreply 33February 11, 2024 6:39 PM

R32, me too. When I lick a but, I want a tight little button, I don't want to suck on some colon.

by Anonymousreply 34February 11, 2024 6:40 PM

We have a real life Gen Z on Datalounge? Is this like a leprechaun sighting?

by Anonymousreply 35February 11, 2024 6:40 PM

R32, can I know why that is? Is it because straight men are more naturally masculine and smell more masculine too? I would honestly get that. However, it’s the hygiene part that concerns me a bit. What do you do about it?

by Anonymousreply 36February 11, 2024 6:40 PM

Dear MANdate Reader's Forum,

You'll never guess the offer recently made to me...

by Anonymousreply 37February 11, 2024 6:40 PM

R34, would about rimming gay tops?

by Anonymousreply 38February 11, 2024 6:41 PM

Maybe we need to start circumcising the anus instead of the foreskin from now on? Then we don't have to worry about straight guys not washing their behind anymore.

by Anonymousreply 39February 11, 2024 6:43 PM

[quote] I just don’t want my boyfriend to ever find out about it.

I'm sure you'll be fine either way. Just given the way you're talking about all this, I think we all know your "boyfriend" is more a fuck buddy/roommate, so don't make too much of it.

by Anonymousreply 40February 11, 2024 6:47 PM

Now if you keep coming back for seconds cuz you can’t get enough of the tasty straight ass, you’re gonna have to come clean to the bf.

by Anonymousreply 41February 11, 2024 6:48 PM

R40, that’s not true at all. My boyfriend and I have been in a monogamous relationship for three years. And yes, we are boyfriends!

by Anonymousreply 42February 11, 2024 6:50 PM

R41, that’s what I’m worried about tbh. 😭

But let’s see what happens. I’m gonna be meeting him tomorrow so let’s see.

by Anonymousreply 43February 11, 2024 6:51 PM

I have a straight (married, three kids) work colleague who is the same age as me, and has a perfectly round, pert ass that I’ve fantasized about eating for the last couple of years. He was a college football player and is not even really my type to be honest, but I am fucking spellbound by his ass. I sneak glances of it any chance I can. I want him to pull down his khakis and sit on my face anytime I see it. I’d even fuck him, and I’m mostly a bottom—but sometimes the ass is too good.

Seize the day and eat that ass, OP.

by Anonymousreply 44February 11, 2024 6:56 PM

[quote] Is it because straight men are more naturally masculine and smell more masculine too?

R32 Are you for real? They’re not a different species, you know that right? Do you think Woody Allen smells more masculine because he’s straight?

by Anonymousreply 45February 11, 2024 7:00 PM

You should go full Golden Corral on him.

by Anonymousreply 46February 11, 2024 7:01 PM

R45 It’s psychological. Straight men’s asses are basically untouched. Their wives don’t pleasure them down there. It’s like a forbidden fruit. When you get your tongue on it, it’s like you leaving your make on this man’s ass that’s yours to taste.

by Anonymousreply 47February 11, 2024 7:10 PM

Charge him double what the whole charged.

Get it all upfront before you set foot in the backyard.

by Anonymousreply 48February 11, 2024 7:12 PM

Why are your chasing work colleagues? Look elsewhere. You don't shit where you eat.

by Anonymousreply 49February 11, 2024 7:14 PM

Once you rim a straight guy's hole, it's a treasure you'll cherish forever.

by Anonymousreply 50February 11, 2024 7:14 PM

It's better than the Ring!

by Anonymousreply 51February 11, 2024 7:16 PM

[quote]You don't shit where you eat.

But he does eat where other people shit.

by Anonymousreply 52February 11, 2024 7:16 PM

can we please not talk about shitting where you eat and rimming?

by Anonymousreply 53February 11, 2024 7:17 PM

The colleague shits where OP eats, R49.

Get it together!

by Anonymousreply 54February 11, 2024 7:18 PM

R47 and R50, yes that’s what is keeping me excited. I’ve very often (too often to be honest) fantasised about straight men and this just seems to be a dream come true. If only I was single I could have gone ahead guilt free. In any case, I’m meeting him tomorrow so we’ll see how that goes.

by Anonymousreply 55February 11, 2024 7:21 PM

honey, in your head you're clearly single. just do it, and have the breakup everybody has in their twenties.

by Anonymousreply 56February 11, 2024 7:23 PM

I am curious about if you'll get Hep B or Hep C from rimming.

by Anonymousreply 57February 11, 2024 7:29 PM

No only Hep A.

by Anonymousreply 58February 11, 2024 7:32 PM

What does "Ive never really cheated on my bf before" mean?

by Anonymousreply 59February 11, 2024 8:56 PM

It is the one sex act that I don't understand what either party gets from it. Your tongue isn't long enough to go deep enough to lick the prostate, so what's the kink? But I don't judge, everybody do whatever makes you happy.

by Anonymousreply 60February 11, 2024 9:54 PM

Don't be a fool. Do NOT do this. Go lick some other straight guy's ass if you feel like it, but I GUARANTEE your friendship will never be the same if you do. AND your boyfriend WILL find out and you and he will never be the same either.

Don't mess with a good friendship and/or a good relationship because your dick gets hard over this. It's a no brainer.

by Anonymousreply 61February 11, 2024 10:04 PM


Don’t worry then some people can be trusted to keep their word once given and most of us can’t. You will be among the can’t.

by Anonymousreply 62February 11, 2024 10:16 PM

Pay no attention to R61.

Rim and report back to us!

by Anonymousreply 63February 11, 2024 10:57 PM

There’s a straight doorman in my building who stops by my place on occasion. He goes ape when I eat his ass.

by Anonymousreply 64February 11, 2024 11:08 PM

R64, he was very receptive to your advertised slogan: I lick where [italic]she[/italic] wont!

by Anonymousreply 65February 11, 2024 11:37 PM

Your entire post sounds made up OP. What a story!

by Anonymousreply 66February 11, 2024 11:48 PM


by Anonymousreply 67February 11, 2024 11:57 PM

THIS is a “once in a lifetime” offer? Get some priorities, OP.

by Anonymousreply 68February 11, 2024 11:58 PM

OP = self hating gay Aspie and an EST troll.

by Anonymousreply 69February 12, 2024 12:02 AM

OP, let me tell you a little story:

One day at my expensive gym, after I finished my workout, I went to the locker room and like two feet away from my locker someone had left a stretched out pair of whities on the carpeted floor. The undercarriage was CAKED with a very thick skid mark that was cracking like sun-dried mud. It was disgusting.

After a few minutes this guy came in the cubby and was on the other side of the nasty, soiled underwear and I look over and said to him, nodding towards the underwear, and said, “Can you believe that…?,” shaking my head with a slight laugh. He didn’t say anything. Instead, he stepped into the underwear and pulled them up.


by Anonymousreply 70February 12, 2024 12:05 AM

Of course, OP.

Your only posts and only thread on the DL is this one, and you appear with an authenticated ID.

Of COURSE you're not trolling, you POS. Even your English betrays you, with the just-so detail and other peculiar wordings (referring to the man's wife as"the woman.").

Fuck off.

by Anonymousreply 71February 12, 2024 12:06 AM

The fact he wants you to do this means he is going to fuck you. Be prepared. You can't really eat his ass without doing the balls and cock. Just get him hot and bothered and crawl up him and say "I know you want to fuck me" and mount him. Then as you ride him move in for the kiss. Once you get the tongue in he will fuck you harder. Let him come in you and then joke about you not being able to get pregnant and anytime he wants to do it again just to let you know.

by Anonymousreply 72February 12, 2024 12:06 AM

Wow R72. Thank you for the lessons on self respect.

by Anonymousreply 73February 12, 2024 12:08 AM

[quote] straight men...smell more masculine too? I would honestly get that.

You are obviously very warped, OP, if you believe that.

by Anonymousreply 74February 12, 2024 12:30 AM

r73 sorry where is the self-respect in the OP's post? This ain't about self-respect it is about bagging a straight man on your terms.

by Anonymousreply 75February 12, 2024 12:37 AM

OP asks, What should I be doing?

Taking a writing class.

by Anonymousreply 76February 12, 2024 12:42 AM

Fair enough, R75. I was just kidding.

by Anonymousreply 77February 12, 2024 12:57 AM

Every chance we get.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 78February 12, 2024 1:08 AM

[quote]It is the one sex act that I don't understand what either party gets from it.

And I wouldn't cross the street for (only) a blowjob for the hottest man.

While other people get off on frottage of all things.

As you say, different people like different things.

by Anonymousreply 79February 12, 2024 9:49 AM

But here’s the thing, R23.

To me “frau” monogamy denotes a closed unit of two and no fucking outside it. The male enters into the deal knowing the female is assigned the duty of policing the sex and neither acknowledges that what they’re doing is fragile and nothing like what the majority of heterosexual men really want, but at least he knows she probably won’t be announcing any pregnancies by other men if monogamy is such a big damn deal to them.

Whereas non-frau monogamy is an arrangement within which both partners get what they want. At least in theory.

In this case, OP is worried enough about his boyfriend to come here and ask about the wisdom of cheating with a *straight* man. My personal feeling is, if OP is going to cheat he should at least cheat with a gay man. If OP’s boyfriend finds out and blows up, OP still has possibilities with a hypothetical gay man, while the straight guy will always keep him in a closet as small and tight as the ones heterosexual frauen are expected to keep their husbands in.

by Anonymousreply 80February 12, 2024 4:21 PM

No. As to licking a gay man's ass, I haven't done it in years, and rarely did it. Even then, I did it with guys who I knew cleaned themselves out.

by Anonymousreply 81February 12, 2024 8:48 PM

Well, OP? How did it go?

Did you chow down on that straight ass?

by Anonymousreply 82February 12, 2024 11:38 PM

R82 and everyone else. Sorry for the late response but yes, we met post work at my place (my boyfriend was still at work) and I ended up blowing him and licking his ass. It felt a little weird to cheat at first but I ended up not feeling guilty anymore thereafter. He also played with my nipples and did a little bit of dirty talk while he watched straight porn. Overall, I jerked off later after he left that night and ended up cumming massively. The strange part is, we haven’t spoken since it happened. I told my boyfriend today and he did not seem too surprised by it and kinda got excited after him who the guy was (they know each other). Thank you all for your advices.

by Anonymousreply 83February 14, 2024 6:08 PM

And honestly, I also talked to my boyfriend about the possibility of a threesome with him after the initial awkwardness goes away. And yes, I agree that straight men may not incredibly massively clean like most gays but I think the hotness of the situation and the man involved kinda makes you overlook that.

by Anonymousreply 84February 14, 2024 6:15 PM

No. I’d never do it unless I knew the guy was scrupulously clean (and smoking hot). Straight guys I imagine have no concept of anal hygiene.

by Anonymousreply 85February 14, 2024 6:55 PM

So, R84, the candidiasis or giardia you get from a straight guy’s ass is ok?

by Anonymousreply 86February 14, 2024 6:57 PM

R86, I think you misunderstood me. He wasn’t dirty in the way you guys are thinking. He was just sweaty down there (even his dick and balls) and he smelled of sweat and musk strongly down there. But he wasn’t dirty as in shit.

by Anonymousreply 87February 14, 2024 8:22 PM

Uh huh R87. You’ll have plenty of time to post while you’re shitting your brains out when you get sick.

by Anonymousreply 88February 14, 2024 8:32 PM
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