Our Closet-Case Server: "Are your related?"

That whore was working u bishes for just the tip

Why quit the restaurant over this buffoon? In the future, just make a reservation and ask not to be seated in blabbermouth's service area.

We tipped 24%. What I left out was that right after we ordered dessert, our housekeeper texted us that there was a plumbing issue that we needed to get professionals in to deal with.. The server approached us for the 900th time and I said, I need a minute, my housekeeper just texted me that water is bubbling up through the shower and bathtub in both bathrooms, and I'm trying to coordinate the plumbers to come by. He would not stop talking, despite the fact that I was focused on my phone.

We were ten minutes away from home, and the plumbers were there when we arrived, so everything is okay. But I am haunted by the server. He said to us over and over, "I'm in my sixties, maybe I'm too old for love." He asked us what our favorite local restaurants were, and every one we mentioned he said he worked at, for a very long time. Like 20 years. We've never encountered him at any of these places.

Anyway, my point here is that the guy aggressively outed us, and I think he's a closet case. He seemed completely gobsmacked when he asked how we were related and I said were were married. He kept wandering back to our table after that, interrupting our conversations and ignoring the fact that our mouths were full, bemoaning the fact that he had never found love. I feel sorry for him or whatever, but I paid a lot of money for lunch and I'm not going to do it again just to listen to this guy complain. We were both pleasant as fuck to this guy, but I'm not going back for more.

He was hoping you and hubby were looking for a third. He wanted you to ask when his shift ended.

You were his last chance and you made it all about you and your plumbing problems. So selfish.

Okay that may be true but he was fug as hell. Maybe you and your boyfriend would be interested in taking on this charity case and reporting back. God bless.

R5 I’m old, fat and ugly, and I haven’t had a boyfriend since the Reagan Administration. I’m only good for passing judgment on others at this point.

That’s frustrating, OP. You and your husband were there to spend time with each other, not to get front-row seats to The Server Show.

You made the mistake of feeding subject matter to Chatty Cathy. It seems to have been evident that he wanted to talk endlessly about himself and you foolishly answered his questions.

The way to rebuff unwanted questions is to answer back with a question, "Why would you ask?" Without variation abd in response to every question or half-assed explanation. "But why would you ask?"

It works brilliantly. Abd quickly, too, if you've perfected the cold, penetrating gaze.

Having missed your opportunity to ice him out, you were left with having to explain that you wanted him to fuck right off. But next time don't feed the pest.

"Really, I don't know why you are asking so many questions and telling us so much about yourself but I wish you wouldn't. We're just here for a quiet lunch, just the two of us. We'll give a signal if there's anything else we want, thanks "

What R8 said. You can be polite but still set clear boundaries and expectations. Some people desperately need them.

State you boundaries with serving staff THEN so you don't have to state them NOW.

"For reasons you won't go into". Okay, Johnny Drama, why can't you just say, "we have lunch every Thursday." ? You seem a bit extra, and he was playing off of that.

This has to be one of the most shallow things I've ever read on the DL. I don't care what the relief worker is saying as he throws loose grain out into the crowd and a few pieces make it into my mouth and I scramble for more on the ground. San Francisco is a small city?

Is there a chance that you might move on with your life OP?

Oh, the struggle. How will you ever pick up the pieces from this hardship?

At least your housekeeper will probably help.

What dick wilting behavior. I bet the OP lives in the poor part of Marin or Marin adjacent. New money not earned.

How did the waiter out you? You outed yourself. Your story sounds fishy too. You hadn't been to this restaurant in a year, then you say this incident means you won't be going back anytime soon? Clearly not, if history tells us anything. And why are you prattling on about your plumbing? I'm with R11. If this annoying creature you describe actually exists, he might have descended upon you because he detected a kindred soul.

Tales of Marin City

1/10 EST

This happened.

R15 The low income area of Marin County is Marin City. But if you lived there you probably wouldn’t have a housekeeper.

I know that. It’s called sarcasm.

As if he's never encountered a gay married couple in SFO.

How come the second time he interrupted your meal about something unrelated to service you didn't give him your best Miranda Priestly imitation. "That is all" is a very effective dismissal.

Instead of a tip, did you leave a note that started with, "for reasons that are well known to him.."?

I woulds socked him right in da nose!

Don’t be avoidant. Next time say, “Sorry, we’re in the middle of something.”

^Don’t be avoidant about going back.

Your trials and tribulations must be too much to bear, OP.

Lost me at "little rotund fellow"

[quote] I live just outside a major (if not big) city. Okay, it's San Francisco, and I live in Marin.

Why not just say “I live in Marin?”

[quote] The server was a little rotund fellow in his sixties

I am a little rotund fellow in his sixties, and I don’t like your tone.

R28 Indeed, why not also just say "my husband and I eat lunch out each Thursday"? It's not as exciting like that.

“For reasons I won’t go into”

Did a witch place a curse upon you where you are forced to go out to lunch every Thursday?

[quote] We tipped 24%.

Why reward the guy for making your lunch a horrible experience?

[quote] For reasons I won't go into

Please, NO ONE ASK ME ABOUT MY BACK BRACE!!!

To satisfy their addiction to ostentation, R32.

Barely believable to start with, but the "housekeeper" texting you turned it into "this never happened."

[quote]R35 For reasons I won't go into, my husband and I go out to lunch every Thursday.

It’s hard to imagine there would be an [italic]interesting[/italic] reason for this.

Why can't these cosplaying OPs at least be amusing?

OP, you and your husband sound utterly obnoxious. You must be old school gays.

I'd rather my husband text me while I'm having a sexually awkward lunch with my housekeeper.

Dear OP, Thanks alot for Blabbing about the Great Service i provided for you. Actually it was YOU that kept talking , going On and On ! I was just Doing my job quite competantly and trying to get the both of you to Leave as we had people waiting.

TL;DR

Were you at Sam’s in Tiburon?

[quote]But I am haunted by the server.

Confirms R38's suspicion.

There are so many gay twin couples around that we'll need to see a current photo of you and your husband to determine whether or not this server was off the mark with his "Are you related?" question.

You’ve seen him: VeryVintageBeefcake

Okay, big deal. You encountered a overly mouthy oldster waiting tables It was an hour or so out of the rest of your life. Get over it, because you're likely to encounter plenty more people who play on your last nerve unless you want to live off the grid.

Never be rude to people who are handling your food.

Marin?… Housekeeper?…

OK. Weird flex, bro.

[quote] Today we went to a waterside place

Was it a nautical buffet with riparian entertainment? Otherwise it sounds like a rather down market establishment. Sheridan would be aghast if Richard and I even considered dining at such a lowbrow boite.

Has this OP been diagnosed?

Because it needs treatment.

[quote] For reasons I won't go into, my husband and I go out to lunch every Thursday.

Sounds like something a marriage counselor would suggest during couples therapy.

‘Rotund little fellows in their 60’s” is my sweet spot. Where can I find this guy?

OP, at the second question you should have HISSED at him.

R42 No we were in Sausalito, but in Tiburon we like Sam's for the view and Salt and Pepper for the food.