Are there any masculine gays here?

Yes kweeeeeeeen. Masc playa in da haus!

I always felt like a minority because the majority of gays that I knew were always screeching queens covered in feathers and mommy issues.

I paint warhammer figurines.

Define “masculine”.

People are always surprised to learn I’m openly gay.

Not sure if that makes me “masculine,” though. I’m useless at sports, hate the outdoors, and hate beer.

My femme brothers don’t bother me at all. *shrug*

It’s tough because no one knows we’re gay. I’m constantly coming out.

R6 and scorning women who thought they had a chance.

[quote] Are there any masculine gays here?

Why, yes…Thanks for asking!

Did someone roar?

Does anyone really think the OP is a gay man? Doesn’t every gay man know that only masculine gay men have a sexual history with women, and are bothered by feminine men. Actually I vote: troll.

R5, how can people be surprised if you are openly gay? That’s an oxymoron.

OP-You go GURL !

I prefer guys who are neither masculine nor feminine.

An example of this type is Ted Schmidt on Queer As Folk- he was not at all effeminate but he was not masculine either.

I was not attracted to him but he's a perfect example of a gay male who's neither masculine nor effeminate just neutral.

I guess you could say I'm masculine. I was a frat guy and nobody can really tell I'm gay. I like hanging out at sports bars and can easily strike up a conversation with a straight guy sitting next to me. I'm not athletic or anything. I enjoy beer, bowling, shooting pool, etc. My problem is I'm a bottom and everyone wants to get fucked. Even femme guys with huge dicks.

I guess I shouldn't have limited my previous comment to femme guys with big dicks. It's straight guys with big dicks also.

I’m not super masc or femme, but I’m certainly no queen. Hmmph!

Most gay guys I meet I’m not into.

There have been a few straight married guys I’ve met who are my type —maybe they’d be with a guy under the right circumstances.

My type who I’d want to be in a relationship with — a Christopher Rufo type or a Lex Fridman.

I also like boys like Shawn Mendes and Joe Jonas of Joshua Bassett.

I am. No one ever assumed I was gay. Though I can gay it up if I want.

My life has had ups and downs. I don't think my masculinity had much to do with that.

I have no issue with femme gays. In fact, I have a few good friends who fit the bill. I am not sexually attracted to femme guys, however.

I love gay culture. It's fantastic. Most of it, anyway. I am very comfortable in my skin and would never judge someone for being more masculine or less masculine. I couldn't really care less, frankly.

I was never with women. Ever. Not even in high school. I hid in plain sight then and came out at 19.

I'm naturally masculine but I can femme it out like the best of them as long as I'm in good company. So, no, I don't mind girly guys and I must say the ones I've had were great lovers because they were quite uninhibited, which is something I cannot always say about the masculine men.

"People are constantly surprised I'm gay" is the new DL "I'm 54, but look 23".

I don’t know if I’d consider myself “masculine” but I’m definitely not fem. I am partnered but I don’t talk about my personal life at work. I just kind of assumed that people know I’m gay because I never talk about being married or having a girlfriend at work, but people do sometimes ask if I have a girlfriend, so I guess it’s not obvious I’m gay.

I’m not annoyed by gay men who are naturally feminine. I am, however, extremely annoyed by those over-the-top, flaming queens who have to make their sexuality their entire identity. I feel like they’re making the whole community of gays into a joke.

And I DESPISE the “nonbinary” ones. Pathetic narcissistic assholes pretending to be neither male nor female. You’re a man in a dress. You’re cross-dresser. Get over yourself. I’m talking to you Sam Smith.

I’m actually a Gold star gay. Never been with a woman. Have no desire to even try it.

[quote] [R5], how can people be surprised if you are openly gay? That’s an oxymoron.

Openly gay doesn’t mean “wears a sign.”

I guess I am.

I’ve been out since my teens but two decades later people are surprised when they find out. Grew up mainly being friends with straight guys and tended not to have too many girl friends (girls didn’t seem interested in being my friend since I knew little about fashion and tend not to gossip. I’m also on the quiet side which most people read as me being stoic. I’m also a top.

As for femme guys? It’s a love/hate relationship for me. I definitely want someone femme as a partner though. I like femme guys who are quiet, sweet and homebodies. Tend to really dislike the loud drag queen wannabes. Also like r20, I do not like non-binary types. Mainly because I’ve never been attracted to one. So to me it’s something ugly peoples do to stand out.

I play professional sports and play date an attractive woman with long legs, bright red lipstick, and a decent singing voice.

Except for DL absolutely no sane person anywhere would think I was gay.

Masculine? Ha!

You're all still fags!

Omg people are really still having this conversation?

Yes

Good. Thanks for asking.

No, not really, though I can be annoyed by walking gay clichés who seem to be no more that a collection of mannerisms, slang, and slavish devotion to trends. But that's usually a different sort of gay.

And so it goes.

No, of course not.

I'm probably more gay neutral, but I'm also a big, burly guy, covered in tattoos, I grew up and still love punk and hardcore music, baseball caps, sneakers, etc. I think people can pick up on me being gay pretty quickly and I have nothing but love for my femme brethren, though my preferred partner tend to be nerdy, quiet, otter types. Woof.

When I worked for KPMG there were tons of straight men who had very effeminate mannerisms. A gay administrator who worked there said that it was an “accountant thing”.

I can be attracted to mildly effeminate guys as long as they are not SCENE QUEEN types and not bitchy.

I also like mildly masculine guys but not too masculine- in either case I like slim guys not muscular and not bear.

OP? What are you talking about? We're ALL masculine gays here.

These threads are always ridiculous. Most gay men, including myself, have masculine and “feminine” qualities. As most humans do. The yas kween community is a pretty damned small minority of gays. They get all the camera time, but they’re not a good representation of most gay men. Stop obsessing over this masculine/feminine nonsense. Everyone is different.

R31 I wouldn’t say they are small community but I get your sentiment 100 percent. I feel some posters here feel very insecure about quote unquote yas queen type gays and therefore always feel the need to mock. What’s funny is that many of these old queens prolly ping to high heavens in person. I’m an actor. I can embody any persona I want.

"Are there any masculine gays here?"

I suppose there are, but I know one thing for certain: there are a lot of desperately insecure queens who post here seeking to affirm their alleged masculinity by putting down others they perceive as "different" and therefore less "manly." And they do it with unmitigated glee because it makes them feel better about their pitiful (yet masculine) lives.

In order words, there are gay men who like to bully other gay men for being less "masculine," the same thing bullies did to them before they started put on their "masculine" facade. As an example, see Miss Opie.

R33 drops mic. 👏 👏. 100% spot on.

R33

And guess what straight men also put down straight men thought to be less than masculine, Strength and toughness is prized fem like behavior is seen as weak, Physically weak and soft.

Although for straight guys being fem is more than OK if you have a pussy,

So when some straight guy beats your simpering gay ass simply because you are what you are, we can just laugh about it and walk away? Is that what you're saying? Because straight guys act like assholes gay men should act like assholes too?

News flash: men secure in the masculinity don't make fun of other men. Only desperately insecure, weaselly, poor excuses for men put down other men for their perceived lack of "manliness."

I am not super masc or femme but the guys who hit on me were generally all masc. When a femme guy has a bf they are generally all masc. Guys who are usually attracted to masc only are generally not masc themselves. They think they are, but...

R36- There is certainly TOXIC masculinity but at the same time a lot of queeny gay when are

TOXICALLY FEMININE

With the right dick pic, any gay can be masculine. That is, if you leave your painted nails out of the frame.

TOXIC FAGOTRY

No matter how masculine you are, you still have an X chromosome.

Are there any straight acting gays here?

I was once asked by a coworker if I'm a virgin (I was 34 at the time).

R43

Tim, is that you? If so better luck nextt time.

I mean...It was great when I was younger and AN IDIOT. I wore it as a badge of honor. "I had no idea that you were gay" "YOU'RE gay? Are you sure?" And not because I'm particularly "Masculine." It's simply because their idea of a gay person is so stereotypical. I'm not big on fashion, I don't shave and look like a member of TV on the Radio. I get that A LOT from other gays. I've even had people come up to me in gay clubs who I thought were trying to pick me up but turns out they thought I was a drug dealer. NO shit. SEVERAL TIMES.

Unfortunately, for many people, gays fit into ONE category even if you're in a gay establishment.

On top of that, I’ve had gay “friends” constantly tell me that “I don’t dress gay enough or that I should shave and get a haircut, etc.” And that hurt my feelings. Or "You're always here with a girl. We just thought that you were cool straight people." But I was there EVERY week.

THAT perception of me just got old, and I realized that it was more of a hindrance than something to be proud of.

R7. Are scorning women anything like cunting butlers?

I am a masculine gay guy here. I never been with a woman either. But I have just as many straight friends as I do gay friends. My straight friends, in their awkward way, say the like that I am not queenie and like hanging out with me. And that's what they usually say as I'm planning on how to get into their pants. I actually like femme guys, I find them sexy. I like other masculine gay guys too. I am a top so depending on my mood I like a sexy femme boy comfortable in his sexuality OR a really masculine guy who behind closed doors loves giving up his horny hole in the sluttiest kind of ways.

The irony is that a lot of times it's the femme guys, who are absolutely comfortable in their skin and know what they want, that come across as the most masculine to me. For me personally I felt most like a man when I was finally comfortable and open with my sexuality in the face of other people's opinions.

Yeah, I guess I fit the masculine mould, life is easier for masc guys cos we get a choice about when and where we come out which more femme guys dont as they is obvious.

That said R6 got it right;

[quotte]It’s tough because no one knows we’re gay. I’m constantly coming out.

And sometimes I really have to spell it out to people before they get it too. I'm as openly gay as I possibly can be but yes, R11 people still get surprised, all the fuckin time. Maybe if I dressed more stylish and was more classy and shit and not so uncouth then people would get it more quickly, but fuck it I cant be arsed changing

[quote]My life has had ups and downs. I don't think my masculinity had much to do with that

This - I've had shit but mostly not through being gay as such

Femme guys - I LOVE femme guys, and I generally find them really attractive, much more so then masc guys. Have had a couple of femme partners

I dont really have a strong opinion on the evolution of gay culture as such cos I dont actually have all that much to do with it these days

I had a one three week thing with a female woman of the opposite sex before I came out at 19 never looked back since

R48- The fact that you're a V-8 fairy sounds more butch then being merely a four cylinder.

*asks R45 out on a date*

R45- Years ago I was in a bar/club in San Francisco and this cute guy- he was neither effeminate nor masculine- asked me if I was gay because you look straight he said- something like that.

Teacake an actor, one of the bat shit professions, color me surprised.

No such thing

Many people have told me that I didn't act gay. That they would never have suspected. In HS my group was the Braniacs. We weren't nerdy, just know it alls. I have always felt smarter than others but not anymore or less masculine.

On occasion I felt I could have been"gayer".

^^ Shut up, nerd.

R55, you have inferiority issues. Learn to love yourself before you attack people for the internalized shame of inadequacy.

Peace.

R54

R56

He is just envious that you are so much self described smarter and so much self described butcher than the rest that post at DL.

Well not smarter and butcher than me but the others.

Be like Taylor don’t worry about the haters out there