Alice

[Quote] Why did Alice stay with this ungrateful bunch?

It was in her contract. Besides what other show wanted her and what had she done before or since?

Hee cousin was a lesbian drill Sargent

Don’t worry. I put some Shug Avery pee in their lemonade every now and then.

The Brady residence gave her easy access to Sam's sizemeat. That was all she really needed to keep her content.

It was nice to see her triumphant breakaway in the spin-off Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore.

Her television career went back to the fifties…she was quite busy in television.

The Bradys gave Alice a sweet deal when they allowed her to live in their house despite her felony record. Also, they had the upper hand, since any allegation of inappropriate behavior around the children would be her third strike. That’s why she had no choice but to play along with their warped mind games.

She should have knocked the fuck out of those kids.

What were they paying her to be a full time live in maid?

WERE they paying her? Mr Brady didn’t seem to pull a lot of hours at the office, six kids to support- where were the funds for a maid?

And wtf did Carol do alllll day? She never seemed harried or taxed much.

Carol didn't do shit to help

Alice has seen some things

I think the idea was that Mr. Brady had hired Alice to help with the boys when he lost his first wife, and it would have been cruel to fire her after he re-married.

Carol was not very busy, but that was pretty much the dream for housewives in the early 1970s.

Hey it’s the dream now (for me) !

OP from his pampered sparkle pony bubble, under the false impression that live in help have lives that are beds of roses and respect.

They wouldn’t even allow Alice to copy Carol’s shag hairdo, though it would have made her look years younger.

I Arkteck , to !

Tiger didn't disappear or run away, he was last night's meat loaf.

R17 The original tiger was hit by a car in real life

If only Linda Lavin had played The Brady Bunch's Alice.

"GAH-REGG, MAHH-SHAHH... oh my GAWD..."

I think they also nailed Tiger down (collar into astroturf) to control him.

"There's a new maid in town and she's cleaning good!"

R20 True - the 2nd fake Tiger. The first one was very well trained.

Nailing me down was Thindy's idea after I chewed off Kitty Karry-All's face. Vengeful little MAGAt in pigtails.

Paramount is actually missing a bunch of episodes… Desi Arnaz, Jr., Romeo & Juliet, Davy Jones to name a few.

It was a pretty sweet deal for Alice. $35 a week plus all the leftover pork chops and applesauce she could want. It's not like she had a lot of other job skills. And agreed, Carol didn't do fuck-all after she married Mike. They had boring maintenance sex about once a week. Other nights he had to "go back to the office for work" which meant either Hollywood Blvd. or one of the truck stops along the newly completed I-5.

A young Bonnie Franklin as Alice would have added a whole new level of tension...slapping those kids all over the place and wearing her maid's ouffit sans bra.

"Hold me, Sam! I'm scared of Jan in her freaky wigs."

[quote]It was in her contract. Besides what other show wanted her and what had she done before or since?

She was an Emmy winner for her role as Schultzie on "Love That Bob"/"The Bob Cummings Show." The schlocky "Brady Bunch" was a step down for her.

I was afraid this was another Linda Lavin thread, in the wake of the recent Bonnie Franklin thread.

What was the last show to have a maid or housekeeper as the main character?

Give Me a Break?

R30, probably Maid starring Margaret Qualley from 2021.

"We've Got It Made," R30? Unless you count "The Nanny," and I don't.

R6 what's her real name again?

[quote]What was the last show to have a maid or housekeeper as the main character?

It should have been this

^Oops! Wrong thread. Sorry.

How dare this thread not be about me!

R34 I just googled that

ann B. fucking davis

R30 - Hazel.

She had a twin sister too.

Alice’s cousin was a lesbian drill Sargent

It was a totally toxic relationship built on manipulation and emotional abuse. She stayed with them in the way a prosittute stays with her pimp. Also they got her addicted to speed so she could work 27/7.

Where was she supposed to sleep, on Carol’s face?

Good God in heaven!! Is this really Susan Olsen?!!! 😳

[quote] Paramount is actually missing a bunch of episodes… Desi Arnaz, Jr., Romeo & Juliet, Davy Jones to name a few.

What? No Davy Jones??? Alice, get your fat ass down there and make them release Davy Jones!!! It's almost prom night!

[quote]Good God in heaven!! Is this really Susan Olsen?!!!

I guess you're not used to seeing her so gussied up. Usually she's dressed like she just finished a shift at Jiffy Lube.

Last night I watched an episode when Mike got mad because Alice used the phone.

The last name of the Brady Bunch maid Alice is Nelson. Alice Nelson.

Alice had been a junkie and done time. She was clean for the most part, but Mrs. Brady would occasionally find a spoon or two black on the back. Usually when Sam came over. The real scandal was that Alice was scoring her China white from Greg!

Looks like it's time for Peter to get back in shape!

Alice was a closeted lesbian and back then she and Carol had to keep their love secret. Mike and Sam were beards. Every once in a while Alice got really drunk and asked Carol why she was even in this relationship. Carol would have to reassure her and then have mind blowing sex with her to shut her up for another year.

Alice did fine. They paid her enough to gussy up for her dates with Sam and attend the Annual Meatcutters' Ball. She went on vacations. Carol was as useless as tits on a bull. She flitted around and whined. She did pottery, sang in some choir until her voice went out right before the Christmas Show, made the kids do a cloyingly bad version of Snow White in the back yard and was all too eager to join the school talent show singing "Wherever you Go", with Marcia.

I think Sam was serving up his fat sausage to Mike in the back of the Butcher shop. Mike was always willing to go down there himself to pick up special cuts of Sam's meat. Much to Alice's aching chagrin.

Susan Olson grew up to become a conservative pundit and radio host, so she has the face she deserves.

Alice got suspicious of Mike and Sam the time Mike came home empty handed from the butcher shop, but mysteriously "found" her kielbasa order while using the downstairs bathroom powder room.

You know, if they'd hired the "right Alice", I would've taken care of this problem by scatting all over that bedroom...

There's a new girl in town...

OP - That’s because she was a

DYKE

R56 why does that look like Bill Clinton?