The Gays and Tennis Part 148 - On to Roland Garros

Thank you for the new thread, OP!

We seem to have lost the tradition of starting a new thread with some prime tennis beefcake.

To celebrate RG, here's up-and-coming French THRUSTER, Arthur Fils±

Why not just pay $1.99 a month and the paywall wouldn't be an issue for you? Muriel paywalls these threads because of people like you.

No Rafa at the French is just so strange.

Why is it your business, R2?

New friend of Bill's Poohey is thiccer than ever as he plays the first round of the qualifying draw. If you'd asked Suzanne Lenglen, there was nothing wrong with having a glass of Brandy or two when changing ends. It's sad when you wake up in the morning and it's the best you'll feel all day.

Note that when a new thread is started, the paywalled one dies. That ought to show the strategy isn't working.

Giron of the Great Ass defeats Bublik.

Giron has 10x or more ass than Bublik.

I think Lenglen’s preferred between-game pick-me-up, r5, was cognac. In those days play really was continuous, and there was no sitting down during change-of-ends, including at the end of (advantage) sets. She’d be done for doping nowadays for the cognac.

off topic, but speaking of Lenglen, I think she might have lost that first and only match against Helen Wills if Wills had managed to win that 2nd set (8-6) and it had gone 3... From all accounts, Lenglen was barely able to hold it together towards the end and would have had nothing left, physically or mentally for a 3rd set?.. And of course very slow clay and playing on her home court certainly was a HUGE advantage for Lenglen over Wills..

Anyone who drinks cognac and has a ciggie on change-overs is OK in my book.

Thanks for the new thread, OP.

Hugo Gaston has been fined $144,000 by the ATP for repeatedly breaking a rule concerning unsportsmanlike conduct on the Tour.

Gaston was caught on camera at the Madrid Open taking a ball from his pocket and dropping it to the ground as his opponent Coric hit a smash in the hope that the umpire would call a let and order the point to be replayed. It is understood that he was previously warned by the ATP for doing the same thing at the end of last year.

“This was Gaston’s fourth unsportsmanlike behaviour offence during the 2023 season,” the ATP said.

well doesn't he sound like a cunt

Gaston is such a disgrace to the French Federation. They need to take action to make it clear to this asshole that such behavior is unacceptable.

Speaking of cunts, DL fave Coco Vandeweghe loses in the first round of qualifying for Roland Garros.

....and of course Coco Loco had a racket throwing tantrum, I don't think she'll ever get back to her old level

Coco's also probably salty that when we talk about Coco it's not Coco but Coco.

R18, you’re cuckoo for Cocos.

Does Coco puff?

Follow your nose.

[bold] RG qualie day 1 notable winners and losers [/bold]

winners:

Pouille

Marozsan

Yastremska

Karatantcheva

M. Andreeva

losers:

J. Sousa

Kudla

Johnson

Holt

Basilashvili

Cuevas

Vandeweghe

Kenin

Govortsova

Rabat:

Stephens avenges loss from 13 years ago to Zvonareva

#195 Julia Riera def. Mladenovic 6-3 6-0

Missing Daddy, sweet Tommy and Big Jack D. DL needs updates.

WTF at Kenin, she just beat Sabalenka.

D24, tomorrow in Geneva, it's Draper v. Kecmanovic and Tommy v. Gregoire Barrere. Fritz plays against Giron in Lyon Wednesday.

R24, that is...

Kenin is also a former French finalist....they made her qualify??

Surprising but it turned out to be a good choice. Can’t get out of the first round of qualifying? You don’t belong in the main draw.

With no Rafa, Alcaraz is the only reason to watch this year.

Caspass in lilac.

For you Poohey fans.

Giron ass practicing in white shorts.

R25 hahah sabalenka is weak on slow clay

My pretty pouty Pedro Cachin beats La Monf in Rouen.

I LOVE HIM SOOOOO MUSH!

R33.. i'm visualizing and fantasizing Giron and Tiafoe side by side in a shower and then walking side by side with their wet glorious asses!....

Medwed33 with baby.

Big Jack D pummels ThiccManOvic in straights in Rouen!

Woo-en.

R38 here. Lyon! It'll be the Rouen of me!

Thiccmanovic, LOL

That works.

WOOF!

[bold] RG day 2 qualies notable winners and losers [/bold]

[bold] winners [/bold]

Koepfer

Karatsev

Hanfmann

Wickmayer

Zidansek

Tauson

Juvan

Barthel

Townsend

[bold] losers [/bold]

antivaxxer idiot Herbert

Golubic

So strange to see Hanfmann, who’s had two or three spectacular weeks on clay, playing the quallies in Paris.

R33 I'll say it again: one of the best asses I have ever seen, not only in sports, but in general.

R37 Sorry guys but Medvedev is so handsome to me. Tall, classy, charming. His baby is very similar ot him. Cute.

I have what I can only describe as a 'soft spot' for Medvedev. I don't really want to have sex with him but I do want to be his friend. He seems fun, intelligent and up for a laugh. He'd be great on a night out. With a few obvious exceptions, he seems pretty popular among the other players too.

I like to see him doing well. He's good for the sport and it's a shame so many people immediately dislike him just because of his nationality. He and his family have spent more time in France than Russia. His French is very impressive.

Medvedev is not hot, but he looks like he'd be fun sex. He probably has a dirty mind.

Casper Ruud might be handsome, but he has all the sex appeal of a Ken doll.

Fabian Marozsan, who upset Alcaraz in Rome, was beaten 6-3 6-3 by Chinese 18-year-old Jerry Shang in the 2nd qualifying round of Roland Garros

R48... YIKES, that really does show how bad Alcaraz played and was off in that match! and he lost in straight sets to Marozsan too!....

R49 no, losing today has nothing to do with that match with alcaraz

In a Lyon match against hottie Fils, hothead Mikael Ymer goes full-on Zverev psycho, smashes a chunk out of the umpire's chair, and gets defaulted. All over a line call dispute. Fils moves on to the next round against likely opponent and fellow hottie FAA.

OMG they just showed the hole Ymer made in the Umpire's Chair.

That Belgian twink is bulging all over the place. Yum.

Which Belgian twink? Zizou Bergs or another one?

Zizou is a fabulous name.

Cames speculated that Il Gingio, Legz, or Sebi K would win RG this year.

What do we think, gurls?

I'm sorry, 'could', not 'would'

Korda? He’s barely won anything lately? (Injury return, I assume, but hasn’t had a good result in ages.)

^ ITA it's a weird choice. The other two I get.

Dang Ymer lost his shit!

Sinner's a doubtful choice for RG champion as well. Of the ten finals he's reached, only one of them has been on clay, and that was the lowly 250 Umag. And it'd better not be wretched, ratched, rotten to the core Rune.

Oh r61 Rune is a cunt.

r47 perhaps Caspar is just shy? An animal when he gets his wild up.

At Geneva, I'm glad Caspar beat Wolf, surprised that Young Grigor defeat RCB and disappointed that Daddy Fritz defeated Giron of the Great Ass.

Geneva:

Ivaskha team or Daddy Fritz team?

O'Connell team or Young Grigor team?

A. Zverev team or Wu team?

Ruud team or Jarry team?

Lyon:

Draper team or Cerundolo team?

Baez team or Norrie team?

Paul team or Nakashima team?

FAA team or Fils team?

Ruud is the ultimate pussy, a wimp. He was Rafa's bitch. Rune is a delight. I doubt either will win over Carlos at RG. Meddy is ready, and physically could do it, but I sense a total dark horse coming through. Felix is overdue, and Frances can go deep. Gasquet is another I think could get the crowd behind him, and spur him to upsetting one of the top guys, but falling in the semis.

My heart's divided but ultimately Big Jack D Team

Baez Team

Nakashima Team

Fils Team

R67 I would love Gasquet to have a good run, but he seems to have run out of steam, lately, after starting the season in great form.

If he could eke out 2 wins and hit 600th ATP win at RG that would be great.

I'd have Struff, Cerundolo and Karatsev as dark horses for a deep run to the Quarters or even the Semis.

Wolf’s mullet looks worse than ever.

It’s full trash.

JJ gets the shtick. He's from a wealthy sports minded Cincinnati, very CATHOLIC family. His uncle owned Mid West Sports, and was quite the hottie, Marty Wolf, in his day. His dad, David, was a bit more straight laced and conservative.

Cinderello takes out Big Jack in 3.

Carlos and Novak in same half at RG, Pussy Ruud down with Med

Coco in Iga's quarter, so a must break through moment coming. She will lose a ton of points if she can't even reach that projected qf. I think she can do it, because the expectations for her are down, and Iga has been sucky and sulky lately. w

I don’t think coco can do it. People have her number: hit to the forehand.

POOH-EE doping another Houdini act in the final round of Quallies. The crowd are going wild, singing the Marseillaise and shit.

His Very Big Penis will be truly humungous if he wins.

Felix withdraws in Lyon with an injury. Precaution before RG or is he out?

Hottie Fils through to his first semi.

The women's draw is stacked for RG

Novak has an easy path to the semis. Rublev in the QF will be a cake walk. Med has the easiest path. Carlos has the toughest (TsiTsi in the QF is tough). It's so infuriating Ruud is the fourth seed. Who cares about his draw. He'll lose to any and all top players.

I predict Novak (ugh) and Rune in the final. Unless Rune just doesn't yet have the stamina for five setters.

Stupid Novak for the fucking win.

Novak vs. Davidovich Fokina 3R won't be easy. If his shoulder is not 100%, he's not winning RG or Wimbledon.

Wow, Rafanatic, not sure if that's realism or pessimism, but it sounds like a fucking nightmare.

I don't think Novaxx will win. Not sure who will, but he's looked vulnerable lately.

Med, or Rune, or someone gets hot like Struff -- that sometimes happens at RG. Or, it did before Rafa.

The only reason to see “Nole” win is for him to get closer to reaching and then exceeding Margaret Court’s record and see her squirming about it in interviews. I hope it happens before she dies.

Insteadof the horror of Novaxx, I'd much rather see Rafa recover and surpass Court.

What god must I pray to, R84, to make that happen?

I started watching the Baez/Norrie match, and out of the corner of my eye I thought Baez was Lil' Diego. I guess Baez looks very short too.

Geneva:

Young Grigor team or Daddy Fritz team?

Jarry team or A. Zverev team?

Lyon:

Cerundolo team or Norrie team?

Fils team or Nakashima team?

R87 are you telling us we have a DL Boyfriend clash in Geneva?

[quote] are you telling us we have a DL Boyfriend clash in Geneva?

We do indeed. Jarry and A. Zverev in the Clash of the DL Boyfriends!

Boy versus boy in the World Series of lust.

R87, we regret to inform you that you have failed the DL Boyfriend Challenge.

Young Grigor Team

Jarry Team

Fran The Man Team

Hottie Fils Team

Kiitos kysymästä!

R92, thanks so very much for answering.

Can't we just be happy knowing Rafa is spending quality time with his wife and son?

R94 I think it's lovely he'll eventually learn their names.

Daddy Team

Cinderello Team

CINDERELLO, YOU SHALL GO TO THE BALL!

Frantrastic performance to hurtle into the Final in Lyon. Crushes Cam 6-3, 6-0

What is the deal with Felix? Fabs will probably beat him at RG, if he even plays.

Daddy Fritz taken out by Young Grigor.

Hottie Fils and Nakashima toe to toe on the third set. Arthur's shorts are drenched. Tennis Heaven!

Arthur got sum junk in da trunk!

Young Grigor is showing the years

ALLEZ ARTHUR!!!!

He had to win it twice! Great match. Fucking umpire robbed him at 5-4 match point with a lousy over-rule. Then he got the job done on the tie-break. He really held his nerve on the big points. Seriously impressive!

If anyone wants to have some fun with RG Fantasy Tennis, the Tennis Unfiltered podcast do their own version and they're accepting entries now.

Deadline is 11am on Sunday, UK time.

The Tennis Unfiltered podcast is running a RG Fantasy Tennis competition if anyone wants some fun.

Deadline is 11am on Sunday (UK time).

Apologies for double post.

Felix withdrew this week from his tourney due to some injury, but his recently play has been uninspiring.

Zverev loses to Jarry! One of those rare days when all my favourites win!

Watching Taylor Townsend match right now. Someone please tell her that black is not always slimming.

[quote]Watching Taylor Townhouse match right now.

FTFY

A. Fils Team or Cinderello Team?

Jarry Curl Team or (not so) Young Grigor Team?

Cerundolo team

Young Grigor team

I’m rather indifferent for both matches; they all seem like good guys.

Thanks so very much for asking!

I agree, R112. The only one I almost feel strongly about is Jarry. Grigor has been around a long time.

Cinderello Team

Young Grigor Team

[quote]Felix withdrew this week from his tourney due to some injury, but his recently play has been uninspiring.

I worry that he's gone the way of the flesh and become distracted by the hordes of preying Yoko Onos presenting pussy. The downfall of many a promising career. Hopefully this too shall pass.

[quote]preying Yoko Onos presenting pussy

Roger F lived next door to Tina Turner.

^ Do you think he ever stole someone's Tina Turner wall clock?

I hate to interrupt, but: would it be at all possible to cut back on the esoteric nicknames, and/or the “team” stuff? It detracts from enjoying the main thrust of this long-running thread.

☮️

Thrilled Townsend made it through qualies. Expect her to qualify for Wimbledon, though maybe needs to get through a round here, but faces the 24th seed.

What r119 said. These cutesy names a just infantile and detract.

We've asked before nicely r119 but some of these twits can't take a hint.

[quote] I worry that he's gone the way of the flesh and become distracted by the hordes of preying Yoko Onos presenting pussy. The downfall of many a promising career. Hopefully this too shall pass.

MTE

Haha. R119 said “thrust”.

R119, what don’t you like about the “‘team’ stuff”?

R125 having a stick lodged sideways up his butt probably accounts for it.

Giron of the Great Ass

OMG I just took a week off after Rome and RG is upon us.

So nicknames are too puerile? and teams too?

Why do we have to grow up?

I also agree with those upthread saying the cutesy nicknames and 'team' stuff needs to go. It's the same two or three posters saying the same stuff and replying to themselves. Muriel sees this as spamming the board which is why the threads get paywalled. People too cheap to pay for a subscription then start another thread, the non-tennis fans of DL see yet another tennis thread pop up in their feed and F&F so it gets greyed out. This flags up to Muriel that the thread is pissing people off and the cycle repeats.

Because some people lack any imagination and need everything spoon-fed to them. They would also rather try and control what other people do than use the very simple solution of blocking posters that they find consistently 'annoying'.

But hey, everyone carry on as you were.

[quote] Because some people lack any imagination and need everything spoon-fed to them.

And repeating the “ova, macca” and “Titsi team vs Daddy team” ad nauseam is sign of great imagination??

R131 and yet the solution is right there in the next sentence:

"...use the very simple solution of blocking posters that they find consistently 'annoying'...."

There. I fixed it for you.

What do we think about the fussy queens that are telling us hands on hips and stomping one foot that you can't have fun and use an inside joke nickname because that's not how THEY want to read the thread. Imagine if everything happened just as you pictured it.

Imagine if the nicknames were actually creative and used well—I’d read that. But that’s not what is delivered by these tennis ‘fans.’

The complaint last time was that the nicknames were 'too creative' and that we had to stick to the 'Official List' approved by The Moaner In Chief.

Please make up your minds as to what you people want. After all Ve Must Hev Rules!

The nice thing about the tennis threads used to be that they were silly, light-hearted and we all, generally, tolerated each others peculiarities.

JFC you kontrol kweens need to take a dump.

Every top player on tour has a nickname that's given by the other players on tour. Pospisil is 'Tri-pod', Gambill was 'Jag' or "Hollywood", Wawrinka is "Stanimal", Becker was "Boom Boom", etc. etc etc.

Why don't you kweens write letters to the ATP and the WTA and everyone to STOP IT AT ONCE, or, or, or....

I don't think there was any complaint the nicknames were 'too creative'. If anything, they're so stupid they make Brad Gilbert's nonsensical twitter posts look like the work of a genius.

The fact is the threads keep getting greyed out and paywalled. They're being greyed out because non-tennis fans keep seeing new tennis threads that are being created because tennis threads are being paywalled and they F&F them. They're being paywalled because we have a relatively small number of repeat posters "spamming" the board with the same shit over and over again. A casual DLer might pop in during a high-profile tournament and they're seeing nonsensical posts full of incomprehensible nicknames so they don't engage. So we're getting no new posters who might otherwise up the numbers which would mean the threads would be less likely to be greyed out and/or paywalled.

It's not very complicated. And I don't see anyone 'making demands'. All I see is people politely asking people to rein it in a bit. This happens on every thread on DL. You're not being bullied ffs.

....

....

Yan Hanffman (who I think is kinda cute) has been playing well but lost in the 3rd round of qualifying. His ranking is up to #64 and he was the 2nd seed in the qualies, so why isn't in the main draw as a lucky loser while 3rd round losers ranked/seeded lower ARE? Does anyone know the rules?

Lyon: First set to Fils in emphatic style: 6-3

ARTHUR FILS - ATP 250 winner at 18. Cool as a cucumber!

Bud Collins’s has entered the chat at R138.

What a sad bunch these players are, regardless of their nicknames:

Bud Collin’s’s what?

Completely agree, R145. I’m so disappointed in Ons being a part of this group.

What is the Player Executive Committee? Or is that a joke?

Keep calm and JARRY on!

The Chileno beats Young Grigor in the Geneva Final.

The PTPA is such a rag-tag group. Have they even said what it's for? Have they done anything?

They hold seances to bring back Pospisil’s career from the dead.

Who needs a career when you can have NoVaxxx pat you on the head and tell you you're '"a very good boy!" twice a year... if you're lucky.

Fils impressive in wresting the Lyon title away from Cinderello today. He's got a great future behind him.

First round RG popcorn men's matches: Fils v. ADF, Musetti v. M. Ymer (if he's not in ATP jail), FAA v. Fog, Nakashima peaking v. Shapo slumping, Mackie v. SebK, Djere v. Rublev, Eubanks v. Chucky, Monfils v. Baez, Mmoh v. Fritz, Tiafoe v. Krajinovic, Coric v. Coria, Thiem v. Cachin

Women's: Sabalenka v. Kostyuk, Azarenka v. Andreescu, Keys v. Kanepi, Gauff v. Masarova, Sakari v. Muchova, Fernandez v. Linette, Giorgi v. Cornet, Collins v. Pegula, Svitolina v. Trevisan, Stephens v. Pliskova, Garcia v. Wang

Whoops

R152. Merci beaucoup! That’s a post I can like…informative, without all the superfluous teams and silly nicknames.

Tripod is not on those lists at all, so I choose to ignore them.

[quote] Bud Collin’s’s what?

Oops. I totally fucked up there. .

Cerundolo has asshole face. Baez too. I don't like them

I fear FAA has reached his peak. I had such high hopes for him

With every step forward, Felix has had a history of half-steps backward followed by periods of walkabout. Then he snaps out of it. Let's hope he wakes up right about now.

Will he at least the Québécois Goolagong.,,she had an excellent record…7 titles, and more GS finals in the 1970s then any other singles player.

Agree. FAA has to step up in the next few weeks, otherwise he'll be relegated to ATP High School for the rest of his career, while he watches his buddies go on to ATP Ivy League.

Is ATP High School where Fat Sock and Popsicle are currently studying?

Yes, but they skip class and hang out in the cafeteria bolstering each other's egos and talking trash about tournament organizers and ATP executive.

I'm disappointed that Kyrgios isn't playing.

Not a sentiment you’ll hear in many quarters.

And yet, R161, of the under 25 bunch whom he's played at least twice, FAA only has losing records against Tsitsipas, Ruud and Popyrin. Yet another Felix enigma.

Brat/Legz Q&A.

[quote] Is ATP High School where Fat Sock and Popsicle are currently studying?

Yes, but they’re taking the remedial programme.

RG is officially underway.

Constant Lestienne in first SHOCK on the men's side. Bundles out Karen K in emphatic style. Bread-sticked him in the final set!

Fuck, I just forgot it's best of 5 sets!

*facepalm*

Sabalenka off to a good start.

Commentators said Kostyuk has panic attacks when playing Russian or Belarusian players. I get it but I don’t. They are powerless in this war. By personalizing it, she’s fucking herself over.

Legz stretch

Big Jack tat

Ugly tat on the AWG “model.”

oops

[quote] Commentators said Kostyuk has panic attacks when playing Russian or Belarusian players

What a bunch of malarkey! These Ukrainian players get on my last fucking nerve.

Strange there are no top men Ukrainian players, I wonder if they would bitch like the women do about playing Russian and Belarusian players

Is Tsisipas asexual?

R178, I think he’s just into himself. He’s a solosexual.

[quote] Ugly tat on the AWG “model.”

Who?

Draper. The guy everyone at this site swoons over.

From yesterday - Fils just keeps getting hotter. The ass, the legs, the body, the face. Didn't expect him to beat Cerundolo. He really benefited from the Ymer ejection and the FAA default, but nevertheless he had some good wins and he has his first ATP title and doesn't have to worry about that going forward.

Isner out to Borges. How long will Big John hang on. He can obviously be competitive in a lot of matches with his serve.

Isner's on a 0-6 streak, including losses to guys ranked out of the top 100. He's currently #90 and plummeting. Looks more like a hang it up than a hanging on.

Isner may well not receive direct entry into Wimbledon after this. After all, he made it to the third round last year so points will be falling off his ranking. Pity.

Rublev and Djere are at a set a piece after Djere gets a thorough thigh and groin rubdown and a final pat on the ass from the trainer.

Do people still have the attention span for five-setters? I know I don't.

Yeah. I do. I love 'em.... until a player I love is two sets up and then implodes, of course.

Kostyuk booed for refusing to shake Sabalenka’s hand.

In press, Aryna came out against the war. Doesn’t know what more she could do.

Hell, I suppose people in other countries could have blamed me for Trump’s dumb policies, like I had a lot to do with them.

"Isner may well not receive direct entry into Wimbledon after this. After all, he made it to the third round last year so points will be falling off his ranking. Pity."

ATP live rankings (which are fairly accurate) have him at 90 post-French Open. The "safe" cutoff for auto entry into Slams is 100, though up to 107-08 can sometimes get a direct entry - but there's multiple factors that affect the cutoff ranking. Slam cutoff dates are usually at least 4 weeks before the tournament, so even if he has points to defend during the short grass season before Wimbledon, he should get auto entry into Wimbledon.

That's probably the tipping point for Isner. If he's still getting auto entry into Slams, and can at least get entry into 250s and a few 500s based on his ranking and wildcards, he'll probably stick a round until he can't do that anymore. He doesn't strike me as someone who will stick around and grind in qualies when he's in his mid 30s with kids, and has had a good career and has enough money. He could have a post-singles career in doubles IF he wanted to. Pair him with a really active net player/great volleyer. Then again, when he's played doubles, he's never been outstanding despite the serve and no matter his opponent.

"Do people still have the attention span for five-setters? I know I don't."

As long as I'm watching it live, yes. But I'm not going back to an archived match that I missed and watching a five setter in its entirety. Then again, I wouldn't watch the entirety of a 1.5 hour three set match that wasn't live. I'll watch a 8-20 minute highlight clip on youtube for matches that I didn't see live.

"Then again, when he's played doubles, he's never been outstanding despite the serve and no matter his opponent."

I meant "no matter his partner."

I don’t know how the live rankings can project who will move up, and by how much, by the end of a major.

His live ranking shows him going down one slot. But he lost a lot of points this tournament.

R193, the French Open result is already baked into his new "live" ranking. It's not that hard to project. The organization running the live rankings know where everybody is playing in a given week, the points for each round, the players current points, etc. Plus, rankings are based on a year of points, which come on and off at each tournament. Isner may be losing points his 3rd round points last year's French Open. BUT he seems to have enough points from other tournaments to make the loss of points from this year's French negligible in terms of rankings dropoff after the French.

Live rankings are just a projection, but they're often correct or close - within 2 or 3 spots once the official ATP rankings come out.

The Ukrainian players are all acting like immature babies. How on earth is it Sabalenka's fault that Russia invaded Ukraine? I'm glad Sabalenka gave her a beat down today.

Are the Ukranians pissed that the Russian players aren't speaking up. That would probably open a whole can of worms for the Russian players. Even if they hypothetically supported the invasion (I'm assuming most don't), it's not their fault it happened.

[quote] He doesn't strike me as someone who will stick around and grind in qualies when he's in his mid 30s with kids, and has had a good career and has enough money

Isn't he 38? Are there many who keep going much longer?

Sabalenka was boo'd for being Belarussian. Kostyuk was boo'd for not shaking hands.

Then they applauded Sabalenka. The French crowd is always fickle, vocal and can turn on a sixpence. I'm half-French myself.

I'm watching Moutet v Cazeux (both French) right now and they seem to change who they're rooting for mid-point.

Moutet is popular but a complete mental case. He underarm-served Cazeux and was boo'd. Moutet bowed to the booing crowd and then they cheered for him. If you're looking for rational behaviour, you ain't gonna find it in the crowd at RG.

"Isn't he 38? Are there many who keep going much longer?"

I thought he was slightly younger, but you're probably right. No, not many go much longer. There's a few doubles guys in their late 30s and 40s, but most players are retired by that point.

Ultra MAGA Mopsy is FLOPSY!

Our Loveable Bisexual Sonego beats him (off) in 4.

Is Shelton a MAGA? I've never heard that. I know his parents are very Christian but that's about it.

Follows Candace Fucking Owens and right-wing billionaire GOP Presidential candidate Vivek Ramaswamy on Insta.

Are you serious, R202?

Bingo R202! All I knew was from a little video where he's showing off his wallet with an American flag on it (I think he said he loved anything with our flag on it) and he said he loved country music. Unfortunately, a lot of my family are redneck Maga and they are obsessed with the flag.

R204 that was Tommy Paul, not Ben Shelton.

Are we really back to picking apart each USA player to decide if they're MAGA?

^That was our sweet innocent Tommy Paul who is not MAGA. Not this fug.

Thanks! I just started following tennis so they're mixed up in my head. Sorry about that.

Big-Penised Pooh-ee's Roland Garros Renaissance continues. Straights over Rodionov (who he also beat in the Quallies)

Isner has been playing doubles pickle ball with Fat Sock.

Who is Fat Sock?

WTA RANKINGS: How is Sakaari ranked so high when she loses all the time?

How is Sloane Stephen's ranked so high when she hardly ever plays?

Krejicova and Ostapenko should be ranked higher.

Kasatskina does not belong in the top 10 and neither does Gauff

The computer says otherwise. You want sports writer opinion polls for the rankings? Coco will drop a lot after the French Open unless she makes the finals again or makes the SFs. Her current form doesn't suggest she can do this.

Sloane made the RG QF last year. If she loses she will tumble down.

Flopsy tummy

Ruby on a roll

oops

Jack “Fat” Sock

D Collins should call it a day… props for how well she did on tour after her NCAA success, but she has now passed her prime.

MAGAs should always be exposed. So they can be shamed in public.

[quote] D Collins should call it a day… props for how well she did on tour after her NCAA success, but she has now passed her prime.

Are you sick of her winning?

Danielle Collins is only 29 and will still be ranked around 45 after the French Open. Maybe she won't achieve tennis glory such as her Australian Open finals run from 2022. But there's plenty of other achievements - and potential money - out there to quit now. Plus, she could also go through another relatively good phase. She is, after all, an inconsistent player who runs on confidence.

Was Pegula a star in college? Never heard of her till 2020

No college for the daughter of a billionaire…

[quote] In 2017, Pegula introduced her own skin-care line called Ready 24.

This person has a "skin-care" line? WTF?

Pegula didn't play tennis in college. She toiled on the lower ranks of the tour for years - the minors - Futures and Challengers. OF COURSE if helped enormously that her family had money because she could stick with it when others would have had to bail if they weren't getting the results that would get them a living wage. But she'd hardly be the first silver spoon kid to play pro tennis. At least she stuck to it and made an honest career out of it. I get the impulse to get on her for being the kid of billionaires. But it's not her fault, and she's pretty chill - not a bratty or entitled personality at all. In fact pretty boring.

Lore def Hothead Ymer in 3

Pegula is well respected and is on the WTA players council. She’s a hard worker.

BLH!

Fils not living up to the hype. The French crowd will be disappointed

FAA..smh

FAA should possibly skip grass season, reflect and relax, and reemerge during the North American hard court season leading up to the US Open? I don't think he's going to play his way out of his funk. True, he can view grass as a fresh start and tell himself that it's a better surface for him. But if he doesn't do well, then he's going to be even more of a funk. I don't think he's automatically gonna do better on grass.

Fils is gorgeous. Love his outfit today too.

FAA may want to rethink Uncle Toni as a coach. After all, one would assume Nadal’s success is mostly due to preternatural talent.

Fils evens it up, taking the second set from ADF.

Fils wins the second set. He's fine, sends his love.

Flavio brings the flavah!

Big Jack D out

That tattoo is worth the three pounds he paid for it.

Coric and Coria have been at it for nearly 4 hours and they're only half way through the 4th set.

Shapo.

Packin' Pedro squeezes past Domicakes in 5.

Yet another natch Thiem has failed to get over the line. Must be killing him.

Poor Domicakes. I miss his ass advancing.

Nice moment between Foki and Fils

[post redacted because independent.co.uk thinks that links to their ridiculous rag are a bad thing. Somebody might want to tell them how the internet works. Or not. We don't really care. They do suck though. Our advice is that you should not click on the link and whatever you do, don't read their truly terrible articles.]

Sorry about the link about Draper - I copied and pasted some of it but it didn't show up. (shoulder problem and he had started serving underarm when he finally called it quits). Still hopes to be ok for Wimbledon.

He can fly to my house and I will nurse and service Big Jack until he's healthy and ready for Wimbledon. He doesn't need lift a finger. The only thing he needs to get up nature will take care of.

While Fils may have underwhelmed, Van Assche certainly didn't. He's just pulverised Cecchinato: 6-1, 6-1, 6-3.

Ostapenko is hitting the shit out of the ball.

I know she gets a lot of shit on here, but I love her fight. She doesn’t care about making friends on the court; she wants to win.

Pegula is very solid I feel in any other era she wouldn't be in the top 20. I think Graf or Serena would still kill all of these top women right now.

I don't think Fils underwhelmed. He went four sets with the 30th seed. He's ranked 63 himself (well, he will be around that after the French Open) and that coming ranking is due to a Lyon win where he benefited from an ejection and a default (not that winning the title isn't an accomplishment). He's a good player with potential but at this point he's a 50-100 level player. Those players can have their good days and look top 40, 30, 15, but on average, he isn't there yet.

Draper, drapes, windows, glass….we all see through his lame tennis.

I think Pegula could definitely be Top 20 in other eras, but she definitely wouldn't be Top 10, 5, 3, as she has been. There's always players in the Top 20 who are not that flashy, more consistent than their opponents, and beat players by letting them self destruct with errors. She's that player.

[quote]I know she gets a lot of shit on here, but I love her fight.

She's a DL fave. Talented, round-faced and sometime fat ho who doesn't give a shit what people think of her.

And a fashion icon!

Ostaporka hits the ball like she is determined to put an end to running any further in a point. Her iconic muumuus are all sold at the DL gift shop and can barely be kept in stock. She is one our most bold fashionistas.

In terms of age and achievement, Fils looks to be following about the same trajectory as Rune (but thankfully without the brattitude, and Fils is so much easier on the eyes). This should be a breakthrough summer for Arthur.

I wish all good for Arthur, but Legz is hardly hard on the eyes. His body is ripped, his legs are insane, and he sometimes looks almost cute with his hat off.

No tennis player, ever, had an objectively “ripped” body…that’s not how the mechanics of the sport really work.

^ wrong

Martin Fucscovics, Mopsy, and Legz's legs

^That's not altogether true R256.

sorry, it's Marton

Marton drives La Courier crazy when he's calling his matches. He lusts openly and often.

Cames also referred to Flavio Cobolli today as "a good-looking guy, erm and a good-looking player" today.

I LOLed and thought of the DL.

Cobolli was kinda cute. Who is the cute little French twink that won today? I'd never seen him before.

R259 that’s not ripped. That’s tennis

Which Greek god? Pan, the flute player?

Grigor looks very thin on TV but when I saw him in person at IW he has a very sturdy thick-trim lovely body. He's just very tall so he looks thin. But he was an amazing sight in his yellow shorts as I watched his man panties when he served from the end I was at.

I saw Juan Carlos Ferrero practicing shirtless at the Open way back when, about the time he won the French. There was a crowd of people around the practice court and everybody was talking about his body. It was insane -- no fat and cut.

To each his own, R255. Rune's kewpie face isn't that bad on its own, but mid-tantrum with that braying voice, it's a gargoyle.

Rune has a little bit of Cabbage Patch Doll face going on.

Rune’s makeup face is evident at R267. Why does he wear makeup on court?

R262 he's Luca Van Assche - reminds me of Goffin in stature and the way he plays.

^ he has an IMMENSE forehead

My Boo, Molçan, muscles past Cheaty Gaston, in straights

Unfancied Italian, Vassovori, beats Miaow-Miaow in a 5 hour epic and is ready for his prize!

Medvedev - 2 sets all, just gone a break down against pretty-eyed Brazilian, Seyboth-Wild.

HUGE shock incoming?

^ he has great hair and looks a little like Roger

Thiago in 5, bishes!

OMFG he did it!

Brilliant win. He deserved that!

woot!

a new DL boyfriend is born!

From R277:

[quote] Thiago Seyboth Wild of Brazil reacts as they bite their racket

Is Thiago trans?

Thiago beats Medvedev. He is dreamy.

TC not showing Rune-Eubanks to show empty Chatrier Iga Boring Swinetech. The WTA has no case for equality with the bores who parade around women's tennis. Sabs, Garcia, Jessica and Coco and Jabeur are fun, but the rest = BORING.

Legz thru in 4

Just curious about how many Rune fans we have on this thread. More than 5?

Let's count them all, r283...

Nope, can't see any hands up. Still zero.

Gosh this Iga match with whatserhanme is boring as fuck. I enjoy watching Iga play only when she is getting a beat down by Sablenka or Rybakina

R283, I’m a fan of the Brat’s look but not his attitude.

Judging by the number of likes Rune posts get, I'd say there are about 3... too many!

Looks not look.

Glad that Azarenka and Bianca spared us from the horrors of their onesies

Tommy Paul's face screams MAGA

Speaking of MAGA, Isner will be out of the top 100 after RG.

Has Brooksby retired?

Big-Penised Grampy Gasquet was 1-5 down in the 4th set, down and out, looking miserable - then decides to wind the clock back 20 years and starts ripping winners from everywhere. He's broken Rinderknech twice and is back to 5-5 on serve...

Sorry, Gramps, nope.

Rafa.

Am I the only one who thinks Rafa is ugly now. He used to be cute but time has not been kind imo.

R296, I’ve never found Rafa attractive except for his ass.

What a match between Azarenka and Andrescu!

There’s a Kazakh player named Timofey Skatov. Google spells out his entire name for match scores rather than using initial plus last name. Why is that? Is there another Skatov playing?

If Andrescu continues to play like this, the rest of these girls better watch out

R293 The closet kills.

Domicakes workout.

Absolutely wild ride between La Monf and Baez.

Baez serving for the match...

Rafa was hawt back in the day. But too much sun and balding have degraded his looks.

That was FUCKING MENTAL. Monfils couldn't walk but SOMEHOW got that over the line. Poor Baez.

La Monf over Baez 7-5 in the 5th!

Monfils dismisses Bae. 7-5 in the fifth. It was close to G.E.M.S.death.

LA MONF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The thing about these marathon wins is the winner always loses easily next round because they can’t recover from the cramps.

True, R309. That's usually the case.

Stanimal v. the Kokk should be fun tomorrow.

Daddy thrashed Mmoh today, like 1 1 and 2.

He looked HAF in the interview afterwards. Great hair and bone structure, and that dimple!

"If Andrescu continues to play like this, the rest of these girls better watch out."

They say that about her every tournament, then she plays one of her Bad Bianca matches or gets injured and it's over. Can't stand her, but no doubt she's a dangerous player.

La Monf is a dad now; I forget that. He and Svitolina had a daughter.

I've always liked Svitolina, too. Classy.

Will they roll out the carpet for Gasquet and Monfils at their last French Open like they did for Tsonga? Tsonga had a slightly better career; none of them won Slams but were top players for a long time. Simon is in that group too, but a level lower. I guess the player has to know it's going to be they're last French Open before they play it to garner the ceremony treatment that Tsonga got. Gasquet has been playing past his prime for a while. Sometimes he looks like he's enjoying it and just "let's see what I can do today," understanding he's not going to be winning big tournaments or maybe ant tournaments. Other times he looks miserable. La Monf, when he is playing, seemingly isn't too pressed about results.

I invited my ant to an ant tournament!

"ant" was supposed to be "any."

Monfils 'act' was gamesmanship. Baez fell for it. The camera mugging, the gimp act = PREDICTABLE. Of course, Jim Courier and Jason Goodall fall for it, no questions his sudden surges, running, wincing. Hilarious.

Cames fell for the gimp act and was not limp.

But shouldn't Tennis 101 include if your opponent shows any weakness, go in for the kill?

Must be nice to be ever so omniscient, R318. Whatever it was, it was great fun to watch La Monf come through and hit amazing shots and demonstrate that kind of endurance at his age. Almost everyone in the online tennis community has nothing but accolades for that match. Sad that's all you got out of it.

Garbiñe Muguruza, 2-time Grand Slam champion, gets engaged to fan who asked for selfie in NYC

R321 = Simpleton Sap.

Peppa is OUT, bishes!

NOW who do we fat whores cheer on?

Ostapenko. Always so attractive.

Note to self: Thanasi Kokkinakis is smokin' hot.

Kokk isn't hot to me, but I get it for others.

Norrie seems like he'd be NO fun off the court. THough people say he's a pretty nice guy.

Norrie already has a girlfriend. she's the one who calmed him down right?

That's a very elegant outfit on Pinko. A tennis commentator (Cam Williams) who said he followed her on social media said it looked like she was wealthy. Lots of luxurious holidays and such.

Love watching the upsets, especially Medvedev but reading about his opponent Brazilian Seyboth-Wild's domestic abuse scandal hmmm. His girlfriend was an "influencer" so I hope she's just lying because after watching his interview, he was quite fetching.

Shapo though. Faces Carlitos next.

Good Luck Shapo, you will need it.

I was rooting for Ostapenko! That Stearns girl moves like a litte He-Man

It seeme that the French crowd is cheering every third rate player to a victory

Alcaraz could grind Shapo to a nub with his retrieving, ending in a shit ton or Shapo errors and a straighforward win. But, Shapo has that ability to go gonzo and start hitting crazy winners from everywhere an really unnerve the steadier player. Will be interesting.

paula badosa has split with that hunky bf of hers.

God, I want hunky talented Tallon G to beat Hubie, now that the Pole's gone over to the PTPA Dark Side.

2 tight sets all, and going into a 5th. I swear if Hubie didn't have that serve he'd be decidedly average.

Crackhead Moutet's having one of those days again where he starts producing magic and is causing Rublev all sorts of bother. Just gone a break up in the 4th.

Khachanov and Hurkacz are such bores.

R246, Fils proves to have done better than Van Assche, who just got straight-setted by ADF.

Rooting for dark horses Varillas, Monfils, and ADF now along with Carlitos, Diego, Tiafoe, Etcheverry, De Minaur, Pella, Coric, and Ruud since all of my other faves are already out. Varillas was in tears and hugging half the crowd after pulling out another five-set victory today.

"Fils proves to have done better than Van Assche, who just got straight-setted by ADF."

True, but I'd still put advancing to a later round as a better result vs. having a closer match vs. a common opponent.

R338 there's now definitely room for a dark horse or two to at least make the quarters - I like your list but would add Cachin and Cerundolo.

Oh, and Sonego. He's playing really well so far.

American woman SLOANE! Into Round 3. Redeem yo-self!

I didn't mean to put Sloane Stephens down - she's had a great record. I just remember some commentator talking about her being in a slump.

Interview at FO, she says racism against black players has gotten worse.

"Obviously it's been something that I have dealt with my whole career," she said. "I think that, like I said, it's only continued to get worse, and people online have the free rein to say and do whatever they want behind fake pages, which is obviously very troublesome.

Novak yelling at his team for not being loud enough. Boy, you know you’re an asshole when the people you hate most in the stadium are your camp.

And disgusting the Sloane has to experience that hate. I can’t imagine.

Surprise Sloane is screaming racism now but had nothing to say when the Williams sisters were experiencing racism and talking about it.

I remember annintwrbiew once asked Sloane about comparison with Serena and she said " she is serena and I'm me" what a retarded answer. To be compared with the GOAT,.one would think she would have some grace.

Can't stand her. Hope she loses the next match

* an interviewer

Loving the fact that every time Fucsovics rallies the crowd go wild.

Samurai Lore thru in straights

gael withdrawls from FO. wrist injury

G.E.M.S Pain

That's too bad. I was looking forward to La Monf v Legz.

That sucks!

Rune gets to rest. Interesting.

fun matches tomorrow:

Tommy v Jarry Curl

U-boat v (not so) Young Grigor

Prona v Cachin Carry

Daddy v Rinderknech

With Meddy out that bottom half is missing big names (except maybe Tsitsipas), but it's fun for Americans--Daddy and Tommy. And the DL faves like Porna and Young Grigor.

can't believe russian asshole lost!

Big Foe v Aslan will be some big hitting.

Sweet Tommy

Young Grigor

XXX Porna

Horny Daddy

Teams

R358, why didn’t you post the choices among the teams? No thanks for not asking. :(

(R355, I agree with your sentiment, but I think TsiTsi is in Carlito's quarter. Not Meddy's.)

Daddy by the sea

Dreamy Cachín is up two sets to Porna!

Who wears underwear with swim trunks?

Tomas Martin Etcheverry slays The Demon! The first of my Argie Boys wins today - praying for Purrfect Pedro to bring it home against Porna!

Hawt - R361

Glad Liu is giving Iga a tough time. She may not win the mattch but at least take it to a third set make Iga sweat. These commentators had already ruled out Liu winning even 1 game.

Altmaier - whose kit colour is paying hommage to his opponent - is giving Il Gingio a good run for his money. Some good matches so far today, after yesterday's borefests.

Jannick and Rublev are my boys. I want them to win a Grand Slam, ASAP, dammit!

Giron of the Great Ass team or Lehecka team?

Paul team or Jarry team?

I hate Sinner and I have no reason to. I've used the constant fist pumping as an excuse but he's hardly the only player. He seems pleasant enough in interviews. But I don't want him to win, and certainly don't want Darren Cahill to get coaching wins.

Lehecka Team (I know the face is a bit...not quite right, but that body is tiiiiiight.(

Jarry Team

Beneficent blessings upon your kindly asking!

Agree about Sinner. He's been the next can't miss thing for too long. He's on the path to Titsy/Zverev ville.

Sinner goes a break down in 5th. If he goes out, that bottom half of the draw is a total free-for-alll!

Oh Jannick

"Sinner goes a break down in 5th. If he goes out, that bottom half of the draw is a total free-for-alll!

Huge opportunity to for Rune. Is Ruud on that half as well?

JAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

A crying win seems to have become the new RG de rigueur for the men.

Note to self: Danial Altmaier is HAF

Absolute scenes after that match. Daniel crying, Marion Bartoli choking the tears back. Absolutely awesome from Altmaier - fought like a ferret in a sack.

For Altmaier to win AFTER he served for it at 5-4, got broken, broke Sinner again, went up 40-15 but had his match points erased, and then survived a back and forth between additional match points and Sinner break points - whew. Often when the underdog doesn't take their first opportunity, the nerves and moment get to them. So that's really impressive.

Altmaeir is my new fave. So cute, his tears moved me

There is a match going on now between Gauff and a Julia Grabher. If ever there was an appropriate name for a WTA players it’s Grabher!

Is that a they/ them trans?

GO Coco

Was never a fan of Linsdsy D the player

Lindsay D is trying to win me over in her role as commentator. Seems so empathetic

Always thought Davenport was a good commentator.

Davenport was fat as a player, or as my mom called her, “big boned” or “husky”.

Tippy the Turtle disappoints ... again.

Thiago def Pella!

Giron of the Great Ass defeats Lehecka in straight sets.

Thiago is experienced in beatings it sounds like.

DL Gays and Tennis finds a sweet-looking, smiley boy like Thiago... and he turns out to be a Nazi-loving psycho woman-beater!

WHY CAN'T WE EVER HAVE NICE THINGS????

Sinner losing is a big result, wow. That quarter is really open--I suppose Zverev is the favorite down there (if he wins tonight) but could Grigor make a run? Tiafoe? Maybe Altmeier can keep it going, but I have a feeling he'll be totally drained after 5 1/2 hours plus the tears.

It was great though--I totally teared up watching Altmeier! He held his nerve and his mettle.

"Davenport was fat as a player, or as my mom called her, “big boned” or “husky”. "

She was fat early on, but then got it together and wasn't fat. She was still a big woman - she's 6'2", long arms and legs. It's her increased fitness that enabled her to go from being very good to great and multiple Slam champion.

A 20 pound fat loss muscle build up, nerve and grit would make Bianca a #1 player.

She wasn’t fat. She wasn’t skinny, but a large part of the original look was her sizable boobs before she had them reduced.

Jarry wins; Parry loses.

Fritz is getting a thrashing by the Frenchman

Yes!!

Get the carriage ready! Sexy Cinderello's through to the 3rd round!

Scorching Reboul and Doumbia are into the round of 16 in RG men's doubles. See the next post for more on Reboul, gay or playgay?...

Which would you say?

Fritz up two sets to one, overcoming the obnoxious French fans.

Brazilians are so sexy!

Are Cerundulo, Baez and Schwartzman all the same person?

Cerundolo is about a foot taller and looks nothing like the other two. Am I missing a joke?

Yeah, none of the three look anything alike. That’s like saying Sinner, Tiafoe and Fritz all look alike.

The entire fourth set, the French fans have gone crazy every time Rinderknech won a point or Fritz missed a first serve… like their player had just won set point.

I suppose I should admire their commitment to will their player to victory, but come on.

Can't stand Fritz

Love the French fans

Allez Rinderknech!

Rinderknech is not nearly the player Fritz is.

The crowd crossed the line. And Fritz was the far superior player (after struggling with his serve at the start of the match).

Stupid American, no class

Booooooooooooooo!!

GoDaddy.com

They should have ushered out some of the fans who repeatedly disrupted play.

Who does Frittz think he is Medvedev? Calm down boy you're not at the level to Shhh crowds yet. Win a Grannd Slam first then we can talk

[quote] Are Cerundulo, Baez and Schwartzman all the same person?

[quote] Cerundolo is about a foot taller and looks nothing like the other two. Am I missing a joke?

I don’t think Cerundolo looks like Baez or Lil’ Diego, but I did write this at R86:

[quote] I started watching the Baez/Norrie match, and out of the corner of my eye I thought Baez was Lil' Diego. I guess Baez looks very short too.

Have never heard a crowd refusing to allow a player to speak in the post-match interview. Trash.

Is it Sun- NAY- go or SON- ne- go?

GO Daddy!!!!

R407 =

Getting second hand emabrassment from Fritz 's antics. All this to lose in straight sets against Cerundulo next match.

Marion Bartoli was not impressed with Fritz

^ you're a sour old thing, aint ya?

Suck it, bitches. He won.

I don’t think that’s what was going on with Marion.

She was clearly quite flustered because the crowd had decided they weren’t going to allow the conversation to take place. She’s one of their own, so she seemed shocked that they didn’t stop their drunken antics when she tried to start the interview. She has no idea what to do, and you could hear her nerves in her voice.

I suspect she was embarrassed for Fritz to have to experience this.

French are fucking losers, we all know that. They can't handle an American winner.

[quote]I suspect she was embarrassed for Fritz to have to experience this.

That was also my impression.

Base ass-hattery by the French crowd.

He only shushed the crowd after enduring heaps of their behavior throughout the match. Med would’ve done it way earlier.

At the US Open, sure, the fans will pull for the underdog/hometown favorite.

But once the match is decided, they give the winner their due, because they respect a winner.

These assholes clung to their bad behavior.

Telling the crowd to shut up always backfires if you're the object of their scorn. Medvedev, Berdych and Rune learned that the hard way.

They were assholes.

Sorry there are so few Frenchies left in the draw (are there any?) but that's not Fritz's fault.

Fritz didn't deserve any of that. The French are cunts, we all know that.

Watch Taylor win the whole thing, LOL.

[quote] LOL

LoL! :)

R429, Fritz took out the last one, that’s why the crowd was so salty.

^ yeah

classless and small

They're not a very principled lot, the Frogs.

The French giveth and the French taketh away. They're the best and worst crowd.

Just seeing on Twitter that Richard Gasquet is retiring! I'm so sad. Great one-handed backhand, beautiful bulge. Hopefully now he comes out. We here at DL love you, Richard!

Passionate Mediterraneans!

This is likely the swan song year for Nadal and Monfils along with Gasquet, all born in '86. The end of an era.

Foki Team or Novaxx Team?

Shapo Team or Carlitos Team?

Bi-Lo Team or Ruby Team?

Lil Diego Team or Titsy Team?

Kokk Team or Karen Team?

Cute Cam Team or Lore Team?

Please shut up!

^ that's what the block function is for u dumm kunt

ADF team

Alcatraz (Garfia) team (though I prefer Shapo from purely an eye candy perspective)

Rublev team (though I’m fine with either)

K. Hemsworth team

I’m fine with either Norrie team or Musettimi.

Thanks so very much for asking!

*swoons*

No French players got past the second round. Yikes.

BTW Amelie Mauresmo looks fucken gorgeous.

Bitch must be livin right.

Eep!

R445, she’s a man, baby!

Rublev Fritz Rybakina. Slight preference to Kasatkina Tiafoe Niskioka. That's about it.

But she's a hot dyke. I always liked Amelie. A little bit of mannish overtones, but it works for her. She looks great.

* Nishioka.

But I love Swiatek so I'm good if she's the one.

R448 I'm also loving Rybakina.

Rybakina team

DAMM!

Wow, DL Icons Leylah Fernandez and Taylor Townsend have teamed up to play doubles!!!!

They've played together for a while.

After Gauff’s first round win, during her on-court interview she was telling the crowd how much she loves Paris then said something about how, while lots of people don’t like the French fans, she does.

Today those fans demonstrated why some don’t like them.

Face it: Fritz is a low-key guy. He goes about his business with few antics. He didn’t deserve that.

Fritz deserved every minute of the booing. It couldn't have happened to a more deserving player. Can't wait for the next set of booing

R445 - Stevie Wonder

Who do I have to blow to make sure ADF upsets Novaxx??

WHO GODDAMN IT?

ADF has always been limp when playing against top 5 players. I predict a 4 set winner for Novaxx

I remember watching baby Amélie for the first time on TV, she was 16 or 17, she was playing the Fed Cup or for a girl team and naturally she was the only one not playing in skirt but in boys shorts and I was like "oh come on, that girl has to be family". I thought I knew it all in a snap, and damn was I right about this one: Amélie never disappointed me. Except for when she was playing at the French of course.

Djokovic hasn't even come close to taking a clay title this year. Last month in Madrid, ADF took out Rune, who beat Novaxx a couple of weeks ago in Rome. I'm banking on Foki.

When did nasty queens here start turning on Daddy? Guy barely says a word outside days he plays matches. That's bullshit that he deserved it. Those assholes treated him like shit, acted the cunt while he was playing and tried to get him to break down mentally. That's just nasty behavior. He had every right to shush the trash.

I'd happily blow ADF to victory. Physically he's not really me type, but he's so likeable - animal-rescuing daredevil who's fucking HILARIOUS. A night out with Foki could be a trip.

I watched the Fritz game and Daddy was right. During the interview I thought that he might cry. He was extremely frustrated.

This might be the only thing of interest Fritz has ever done.

Oh dear. DL icon and rich bitch Pegula, is losing horribly to Mertens.

Flashback to young studs.

[quote]When did nasty queens here start turning on Daddy?

Cunts gonna cunt.

@ R468

HAWT!

Come on Jessica!

FRENCH FROG FAGS!

Ugh, J-Peg schooled by Mertens 1 and 3.

Kokkinakis "do you want me to piss on the floor? Is that what you want?"

RG 2023 getting classier by the hour!

Sonego comes back from 2 sets down to take Rublev into a 5th!

LORENZO SONEGOGOGO!

Amazing win to come back after being bageled in the second.

Wow, Rublev out. Wow.

Foki is really sexy. Novak looks flat out there, just served 3 double faults.

"Kokkinakis "do you want me to piss on the floor? Is that what you want?""

Um, sort of.

WTF, Foki is blowing it.

Rublev out doesn't surprise me, though I'm disappointed because I like him.

He's the most straight-forward of straightforward players. Not a lot of variety and simply runs on big groundies and confidence. Honestly, this is most players; there's nothing wrong with that. But he doesn't have a lot of other tools when he gets in a bind or isn't playing is normal game. And clay especially rewards having other tools. That said, he lost in five sets to a good clay court player, so really no shame. I think people were a bit high on him because he won Monte Carlo this year.

Svitolina really letting rip against some random Russian bitch. You can really tell she means it

Why is Andreescu playing mixed dubs when she is so injury prone?

More opportunities for drama, R482.

Svitolina gets good treatment since she's an "adopted daughter of France" via hubby Monfils.

Novak hanging in there, but making a ton of errors. I don't see him beating Alcaraz, frankly. (But he sure is tough in best-of-five!)

R483 , so true.

she is the most drama of drama queens

Fognini would be a helluva drag queen with the higher than high cheekbones and the cheek dimples. He already is a little draggy. Do DLers think he's hot? He is in way to me, but sometimes I don't think he's that hot.

R485 I have a feeling that his mission is to win all four slams this year and then retire.

Good lord, look at the outfits on Ostapenko and Vega Hernandez on Court 6 in their mixed dubs match.

Barnum Bailey right there on court!

I’m not watching the match, but is something wrong with Norrie today? He seems to be failing majorly against Musetti.

R490, there’s nothing wrong with Norrie, Musetti is just in terrific form.

Musetti defeats Norrie in straight sets.

Humiliation for Shapo

I doubt Shapo is going to win more than a few games. In terms of my blonde-leg-hair crushes, I'm switching over to Foki.

R488, I think Novak has a real shot at the calendar slam--but I doubt he'd retire! 2024 will be the big Nadal farewell season, I expect Novak to keep going beyond that. He'll be 40 in 2027, that feels like it might be about right. Roger went til, what, 41?

Glad to see Musetti beat that cunt Norrie.

Latin porn twink bottom Varillas flipping and topping Hubie. Leading 2 sets to 1.

Well, Shapo is stepping up

Djokovic has barely made a dent in this clay season, whicj is his worst on this surface since 2006. I'll be surprised to see him make it past the semis.

Yeah, Novak doesn’t look like himself out there much of the time. He’s still finding a higher gear when needed, but doesn’t look as impressive overall.

Shapoo

Whicj is my favorite Czech player.

jessica pegula got food poisoning from eating snails

FLOPoo!

I like this little Peruvian - relentless fucker.

He's driving Hubie to distraction - he retrieves everything. Leading 5-2. Hubie serving...

Au revoir

Ow revar

Cam trail

^ mole alert!

Thank you for the alert, R507. Vigilance is key in our efforts.

Legz Team or General Albert Team?

Sascha Team or Big Foe Team?

ZZZ Team or Cute Casper Team?

Altmaier Team or (not so) Young Grigor Team?

Nishioka Team or Wild Team?

Prona Team or Etcheverry Team?

Olivieri, Big Foe, Casper. ALTMAIER (I want him to win the whole damn thing now). Nishioka. Etcheverry...

....AND CINDERELLO TEAM.

FFS Cerundolo Vs Fritz could be the best match of the day. How could you miss it?

Thanks so much for asking in spite of the Massive Oversight.

^^^^ yes I knew I was missing one! TY.

Daddy Team

Legz (and he knows how to use them) Team

Big Fe Fi Foe Fuck Me Team

Caspar the Rape Fantasy Ghost Team

Young Former Side Piece of 'Sunset Boulevard' Revival Star Nicole Scherzinger Grigor Team

Yoshishito Pepper Team

Porna Hubba Hubba Team

Daddy France is My Bitch Fritz Team

Just leaving this here...

Men's equipment?

I'm in!

R509 stop..write like a normal tennis fan, please.

Thank you.

What were you trying to link to, R514? I just get the main forum.

I meant R513.

JFC, R151. Just block me. It's easy.

Control someone else.

Just the forum itself, R516/R517, since the posting in this thread gets pretty sparse sometimes. I'd forgotten it existed and then rediscovered it today.

Control yourself. Peace.

osaka is having a girl

I’m surprised Hubie lost, but I’m no longer supportive of him given his involvement with the PTPA nonsense.

Brat/Legz team but only for the eye candy

Tiafoe team

Ruud team

Altmaier team

Nishioka team

Etcheverry team (but prefer the Porna eye candy)

Cerundolo team

Thanks so very much for asking!

Don't like Huckaraz, I'm glad he lost

Is it “Hue-bee” or “Hoo-bee”?

Back under the knife! Rafael Nadal has keyhole surgery on his left hip in desperate bid to solve injury that has bothered him for almost FIVE MONTHS - with results to be revealed today

Eet hurts so mush!

Rybakina pulls out of RG with virus.

^^^^

@ R515

There will be peace.

Rafa post surgery apparently.

Legz through in straights

Lorenzo is tall!

Porna is a such a flop.

Etcheverry is SO VERY! He out muscles Porna in straight sets

Total brutality from Iga today. Just ruthless.

R535. He shaved his treasure trail. -5 points.

damm!

Sabalenka withdraws from open press conferences, proclaiming mental health reasons.

Taking a page from Osaka. There's a lot of mental health issues out there, obviously, but people always using it as a shield is ridiculous. For top players, media duties are a big part of big tournaments - a real burden. It's sort of an unfair advantage not to do it.

Sexy Cinderello goes 2 sets to 1 up against Daddy. Looking statuesque.

Shit. a game too soon. I got totally carried away!

[quote]Lorenzo is tall!

And, I suspect, very well endowed.

I have such a fucking crush on Fritz, it's making me crazy. He's not even my type! I just want the close-up sex tape to leak with him plunging his big, hairy cock into his gf's pussy. What's the matter with me?!

He dresses like he still shopped at the May Company…in 1982.

I’m conflicted re the Sabalenka press conference stuff.

I agree that the Ukrainian journalist had a right to ask those pointed questions, though I don’t think any of us understand the pressures of living in an authoritarian state so am unable to summon outrage for Sabalenka.

And the questioning had become quite aggressive so it was her right to decide she wasn’t going to subject herself to it.

I can only imagine how painful the war is for the Ukrainian players and countrymen generally. I think they’re looking to blame tennis players, and it’s not the right target to me.

Fritz’s girlfriend/bimbo looks as if she finds it difficult to understand what’s happening on court. She really does seem to be intellectually challenged.

Damn. I've lost two of my three faves with Ruby/Ryba and now Taylor's in trouble.

FRANCISCOOOOOO!

My Argie Boys are delivering in spades.

Now take out The Brat!

Mother Fritz was pretty much an Evert wannabe—with more $ and less talent.

So, now, the Zverev-Tiafoe is on Peacock. Meanwhile, the regular TC is showing a MC Sinner-Rune and Dimitrov and other matches are on the TC app. I call bullshit. Will the finals be on Peacock also?

Trying to decide who's the most unlikeable ATP player: Zverev, Djokovic, Kyrgios, Rune, or who?

yeah I hate this Peacock bullshit

Who's the cutie in Tiafoe's box? (Will Frances be in his later?)

Novaxx Team or Nobody Team?

Carlitos Team or Lore Team?

Karen H Team or Bi-Lo Team?

Otter Team or Titsy Team?

Come on, Big Foe. This is Good Vs Evil stuff.

Wow, Big Foe is serving to make it 2 sets apiece

Francis is out :-(

*swoon*

R552 it's name is Taylor Fritz

Wow Wang was double bageled by Svee.

So glad Fritz is out. Yayayay

Why did Rybakina withdraw from the tournament? Iga must be haply

R552, I would say Djokovic because he is not only a reprehensible person but also because he has power on the tour and through try media. His are not just forgettable hissy fits.

Rybakina a virus of some sort.

^ erm, HAS

Varillas team

Alcaraz (Garfia) team (though I also wouldn’t mind Musettimi)

Largely indifferent between K. Hemsworth team and Sonego team, though I have a slight preference for K. Hemsworth for the eye candy

Ofner team

Thanks so very much for asking.

I like Tiafoe so much, but my god it's hard to root for him with his mental fragility. I can't help but think of him as a typical American player, pounding the ball and overhitting on key points. Like, zero strategy there. So frustrating. He should have won that fourth set!

^ Zverev is pretty damn good on clay. I give Francis credit for making that a real match.

Yes, that's true, R568, I agree. Just want Foe to break through.

R552, Kyrgios annoys me the most because he just won’t do the work. He has, or had, real talent and, jackass though he is, he can connect with audiences. But he doesn’t try.

R570 Kyrgios has World No.1 ability but he never wanted to play tennis. It's so frustrating.

Perversely, for me, his laziness is Kyrgios's only redeeming feature. At least it means we only have to put up with his on court antics for a few tournaments each year! Unless you're on Twitter you can pretty much ignore him for the rest of the year.

FORZA LORENZIIIIIIII!!!

^ HAWT!

Carlitos and Lorenzo really should be playing this match in the nude. This is a FAC T.

Alcaraz annoys me, he makes too much noise on the court.

Svitolina beats Kasatkina.

It's a G.E.M.S. world and we're just living in it.

Did they shake hands? She’s the last (honorary) French player standing at RG.

Kasatkina was classy and didn't put Svitolina in the position of having to decline a handshake. She shook hands with the chair and gestured (thumbs-up, I think) to Elina on her way to her bag.

French crowd still booed Kastakina.

It was an awful match. Glad to see Svitolina is healthy but she doesn't exactly play riveting tennis.

"Juan Carlos Ferrero... he's my friend, he's my coach... HE'S MY LOVER!" (Carlitos to Fabrice Santoro)

Not really, but it 's the subtext!

R580, perhaps not riveting, but was it compelling?

Come on, Offner. We need at least one upset today.

Adidas must hate Titsy to saddle him with that hideous shirt.

Do we think that Sloth has any chance again She-Hulk?

A. Zverev

Unfortunately Citybus is going to off Ofner.

Does Zverev have dead eyes?

Dead eyes, rat face, big head, short fuse.

Stephen’s wins four games in a row. But it’s on Peacock in the US.

If I correctly recall, this will be the last time this tourney when the Peacock nonsense happens. Hoping I’m right.

That was a painful tiebreak. Stephens came so close.

[quote]Dead eyes, rat face, big head, short fuse.

I believe those were the original lyrics to the Beatles' "Come Together."

I like Sloan Stephens—she had a pretty good run in Paris after a long string of poor performances. I wish she had a better career…

*Sloane

Au revoir, Lore

Tu vas me manquer!

almost to 600

new thread here

New thread. Thanks to OP of new thread.

Yay! I’m so happy.

Nickname team or Nickname team?

Roland

Garros