Let's Be The Kennedy Family

I'm the bloody marys by the pool on Sundays.

I don't know who I am.

I’m the Irish curse.

I'm Lem Billings, sucking off JFK!

I'm the much cuter and smarter Robert Francis Kennedy

I’m the repressed homosexuality

I’m Rudolf Nureyev‘a monster cock down Bobby’s and Jackie’s throats, on separate occasions of course.

I'm Little Edie on the Fourth of July

I'm Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy. I died about 20 years before they admitted I did. They would just dust off my corpse and wheel me out onto the porch for an annual photo op with the press.

I'm the teefs.

I love to pick my nose.

I am fate. I've dealt a mighty cruel hand to the current generation of Kennedys.

I’m the Marchioness of Hartington. I was to be a Duchess, but shit happened.

I am Pat Kennedy Lawford - do any of you boys know where I might find Peter - he isn’t returning my calls ….

I’m Joan, the forgotten Kennedy.

I'm the rat/horse face combo.

I've been looking through Kennedy pics at Getty Images. Back in the day, they were all so well-dressed and took some really beautiful photographs. I kind of wish my family had done the same.

It is nice that they managed to take a photo on the ONLY non-tragic day in their whole lives, isn't it?

I’m Rosemarys frontal lobe

I'm Jacqueline, and I rhyme with "queen."

I'm their political rival, the Bushes.

I'm the bootlegger fortune.

As honest a fortune as any Irish fuckwit ever made!

I'm the big cheesy forced smiles and the linked arms in almost all photographs of Joe Sr.'s children as teenagers, because he wanted them to look happy and unified. (Even so, some people were surprised he liked authoritarian governments.)

I'm the tree with their name on it.

I'm Lyndon B. Johnson. I know they think I'm a hillbilly from backwoods Texas, but god damn they need me. I wouldn't piss on any of them if they were on fire.

R25- You are also one of the people who had JKF rubbed out.

I'm Chappaquiddick

I'm John Kitzgerald Fennedy, rubbed out by LBJ (according to r26).... because I guess my name sounded similar.

I'm Rose's papal-bestowed title of countess, not used in the USA because it would be considered tacky, but gleefully employed in Europe to get the best hotel rooms and restaurant tables!

I'm teeth, alcohol, amphetamines, lobotomies, tackle football, teeth, alcohol, teeth, alcohol, and family tragedy.

In her day, Joan would've been a DL icon; she showed up to DC parties already drunk, wore revealing outfits not befitting the wife of a senator and if legend is to be believed, passed out in the car on a regular basis. Had she been born in different times, she would've ended up on "The Real Housewives of Potomac" and unlike those tacky ghetto bitches on that show, would've had some real DC/rich woman cred. But at least she outlived old Ted, though by the looks of her, the only that she had on him was an actual pulse.

I'm Kathleen. My fucking mother wouldn't come to my funeral because I married better than her

I'm Andy Williams, always ready to extend my Republican arm towards Ethel when she needs a "walker".

I'm Joseph Baena. I sort of count, right?

R28- I think I'm dyslexic

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

I'm John F Kennedy Jr.'s hairy chest and treasure trail

I'm the professional face sharpener, ready for appointments booked by Eunice and her daughter Maria!

I'm former-Governor Mike Huckabee of Arkansas - and we are the "real" Kennedy family political rivals

(Chosen by God over those Godless-Catholics!)

I'm Ethel's invariable mocking in the hallways of Jackie running water when she uses the bathroom (so as to mask sounds emanating from her body).

I’m the completely irrelevant 4th generation.

I’m the White House swimming pool, full of naked bimbettes, there to serve the “Prez” and his little dick.

I’m the Volkswagen Bug that Teddy should have driven “that night.” Volkswagens are airtight and float.

I'm Gloria Swanson's presence ominously lurking in the background.

We're the female Kennedy side visages which inspired the rustic silhouette visuals of Mt. Rushmore!!!

I'm Joe Sr.'s antisemitism.

I'm Marlene Dietrich. I have slept with every Kennedy man.

I'm Rose Kennedy's walk-in closet. I house the most extensive collection of black dresses in America.

We’re Jackie’s feet. We were constantly ridiculed by the boorish nouveau riche Kennedy women for our impressive size.

When we were padding around naked in that Indian temple, some reporter had the NERVE to investigate our shoes and then reported on our size—10A—which became news all around the world. Oh how we curled with embarrassment!