So how on earth did it happen? How did we end up here?
It is the question posed by the Duke of Sussex at the start of Harry & Meghan, Netflix’s six-hour deep dive into his self-imposed exile in California. And if he is confused, we can perhaps be forgiven for feeling that, halfway through this marathon soul-baring exercise, we are not much the wiser either.
What is clear is that a cheeky, fun-loving boy has grown into an introspective, embittered man – estranged from his family – who now clings to his feisty, beautiful wife like a life raft.
When I began reporting on the Royal family, Prince Harry was a lively, impudent five-year-old. Everyone at the Palace would tell me that he was full of mischief, always getting into trouble and not half as sensitive as his older brother: “Harry? Oh, no need to worry about him. He’s just naughty and enjoys it!”
Ken Wharfe, former protection officer to the boys’ mother, Diana, Princess of Wales, recalls how the young prince was fascinated by equipment and loved to play with the police radio. He invented games in which the boy was sent on “a mission”. But one day, instead of just hiding around the Kensington Palace grounds as agreed, he radioed in to tell a horrified Ken that he was actually in a record shop on the High Street. He was ordered to return immediately.
During one of my lengthy conversations with Diana in her Palace apartment, she told me that, in spite of the breakdown of her marriage, the boys were “generally fine”. “Harry in particular,” she said. “Everything seems to bounce off him. But I talk to them constantly about everything and make sure they ask any questions they want. And I shower them with love and cuddles, because I didn’t get any as a child.”
So it is good to hear from Harry’s own mouth that, in spite of all that has happened in the past few years, he will always be that “cheeky person inside”.
Not that there is much evidence of it in these first three episodes. Instead we hear a tale of love, hate and racism. The love story between Harry and Meghan is cute and interesting (if you are sufficiently invested in them to want to hear the minutiae of their dating history). The hatred that Harry says was directed at his wife and son is deeply unpleasant – although there is no evidence to support the worst of the claims.
There is, though, real hatred spewing from Harry towards the media: accredited press, experts, royal correspondents and paparazzi are all lumped together into one foul-smelling dung heap.
Indeed, the prince says that he feels it is his duty to uncover “the exploitation and bribery within the media”, which is a wild and unsubstantiated accusation. Yes, of course money is sometimes paid for people to tell their stories – but hang on Harry: haven’t you and Meghan just been paid millions of dollars to dish the dirt on your own family and country?
The whole sorry affair is shot through with accusations of racism in British society at large and in the Royal Family itself, even if it was “unconscious bias”.
Harry has certainly found his voice and, in doing so, has proved that he is more Spencer than Windsor. He admires his mother for making her decisions from the heart not the head. It’s something he is clearly proud to emulate.
“I am my mother‘s son,” he declares. The pain of losing her has caused him to block out many of his early memories. He takes a quick swipe at his father by saying he was left to deal with her death “without much help, support or guidance”.
Curiously, this contradicts what he said just five years ago, when he praised the King for having “been there” for his sons after Diana’s death and doing his best to protect them.
On a happier note, Harry does remember a childhood full of laughter and adventure, and he clearly cherishes his mother’s advice that he could “get into trouble, but don’t get caught”.
