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Let’s be “Little House”

I’ll be all the fiftysomething character actors who played the parents of young children.

by Anonymousreply 248June 20, 2023 9:04 AM

I’ll be Melissa Gilbert’s yellow teeth

by Anonymousreply 1December 9, 2022 9:39 PM

I'm the real Laura Ingalls Wilder, turning over in her grave.

by Anonymousreply 2December 9, 2022 9:39 PM

I'm the hot sexiness of Pa.

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by Anonymousreply 3December 9, 2022 9:45 PM

I'm also the 'will they, won't they?' scenario all the gaylings scripted in their minds when Pa and beardy shared the screen.

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by Anonymousreply 4December 9, 2022 9:48 PM

I'm the baby battering ram.

by Anonymousreply 5December 9, 2022 9:49 PM

^.

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by Anonymousreply 6December 9, 2022 9:50 PM

I'm Albert's period appropriate smack addiction.

by Anonymousreply 7December 9, 2022 9:50 PM

I'm the clown rapist.

by Anonymousreply 8December 9, 2022 9:50 PM

I’m Mary and I’m faking being blind for sympathy

by Anonymousreply 9December 9, 2022 9:52 PM

I'm Ma, home alone and hot knifing the pus outta my septic leg.

by Anonymousreply 10December 9, 2022 9:52 PM

I'm Harriet Oleson, despite being married and mother to some kids, I will inspire lesbians everywhere with my shrewish ways, parsimonious nature and penchant for plaid clothing.

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by Anonymousreply 11December 9, 2022 9:56 PM

I'm the wheelchair Nelly didn't need

by Anonymousreply 12December 9, 2022 9:59 PM

R8 I wanted to be the clown rapist!

Ok, I’ll be Laura’s fantasies about the gold she found.

by Anonymousreply 13December 9, 2022 9:59 PM

I’m baby Carrie.

by Anonymousreply 14December 9, 2022 10:04 PM

I'm the crossover episode with the Jeffersons. The shock on Albert's face when he didn't get to meet the President.

And all ma's clean bed sheets went missing!

What an episode!

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by Anonymousreply 15December 9, 2022 10:09 PM

R2. The real LIW would be joyful about the money made off her racist renditions of Native Americans and the Republican-Lubertarian values her books spread.

by Anonymousreply 16December 9, 2022 10:09 PM

Thanks R16. Anything else you're planning to cancel?

by Anonymousreply 17December 9, 2022 10:12 PM

I’m Pa’s beloved, pre-Albert infant son. I died because Laura wished me dead. Bitch.

by Anonymousreply 18December 9, 2022 10:16 PM

I'm the rats who got into the cornmeal and started a typhus outbreak.

by Anonymousreply 19December 9, 2022 10:20 PM

I’m all the dried cum spent behind the schoolhouse.

by Anonymousreply 20December 9, 2022 10:21 PM

I'm the real Little Cunt on the Prairie, Melissa Sue Anderson.

by Anonymousreply 21December 9, 2022 10:24 PM

I’m Olga, played by 70s child star and future RHOBH Kim Richards, gimping around on uneven legs until Pa cobbles a special shoe for her.

by Anonymousreply 22December 9, 2022 10:35 PM

I’m Alicia, Mr Edwards’ adopted daughter played by Kim Richards’ little sister Kyle, also a future RHOBH star.

by Anonymousreply 23December 9, 2022 10:43 PM

Sorry R21, that title belongs to me

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by Anonymousreply 24December 9, 2022 10:55 PM

I'm big bear Merlin Olsen. Is that a tacky flower arrangement behind your back or just a really colorful mussy?

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by Anonymousreply 25December 9, 2022 10:56 PM

I'm Rose Wilder Lane, Laura's daughter, who made Laura's scribbled notes in pencil full of spelling and grammatical errors into something that could be published.

I also did it so my loser parents wouldn't starve to death in their later years. Everything my father Almanzo touched turned to dust.

by Anonymousreply 26December 9, 2022 11:03 PM

I’m country girls!

by Anonymousreply 27December 9, 2022 11:42 PM

I love running down hills wearing ugly clothes

by Anonymousreply 28December 9, 2022 11:44 PM

Country cunts

by Anonymousreply 29December 9, 2022 11:45 PM

I'm Miss Beadle, happily letting the children leave school early for Christmas, and unaware the blizzard will bring their DOOM.

by Anonymousreply 30December 9, 2022 11:47 PM

I'm Percivel, Nellies husband. You all know why.

by Anonymousreply 31December 9, 2022 11:48 PM

I'm the fleshlight Pa fashioned from a butternut squash. I'm used on the nights when Ma hasn't passed out from exhaustion and refuses to remove her girdle.

Pa is off to the woodshed to squash his nuts to butter!

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by Anonymousreply 32December 9, 2022 11:49 PM

I'm Mary, freaking out hysterically when Albert comes to say he's sorry for killing my baby (accidentally).

by Anonymousreply 33December 9, 2022 11:49 PM

I'm all the whores in Mankato!

by Anonymousreply 34December 9, 2022 11:50 PM

R17. No, I’m good. For now.

by Anonymousreply 35December 9, 2022 11:53 PM

I am the mystery as to why Dataloungers always assume Melissa Sue Anderson was the biggest cunt on the set when I've not said a bad word ever to the press about Melissa Gilbert, who has loudly and constantly and nastily complained about me for a full FORTY YEARS over things I did when i was thirteen, like stay away from her and not tell her about what it's like to have your period.

Honestly, everyone in Hollywood knows what a shrieking cunt Melissa Gilbert is. And yet you always bitch and bitch about Missy Sue instead.

by Anonymousreply 36December 9, 2022 11:55 PM

I'm disease and quarantine.

by Anonymousreply 37December 9, 2022 11:56 PM

I’m the knife Caroline puts in the fire, making the viewers think she’s going to amputate her infected leg…

by Anonymousreply 38December 10, 2022 12:03 AM

I’m the chip on Mary’s shoulder

by Anonymousreply 39December 10, 2022 12:16 AM

I'm Mrs. Oleson's head that Mr. Oleson did not cut off with a sword but Laura and Carl thought that he did.

by Anonymousreply 40December 10, 2022 12:25 AM

I'm Ol' Dan Tucker, and I'm too late to get my supper.

by Anonymousreply 41December 10, 2022 12:25 AM

[quote]Melissa Gilbert, who has loudly and constantly and nastily complained about me for a full FORTY YEARS over things I did when i was thirteen, like stay away from her and not tell her about what it's like to have your period.

It's not just Melissa; Alison Arngrim has stories too, as do Ike Eisenmann and Radames Pera.

by Anonymousreply 42December 10, 2022 12:43 AM

And that baby doesn't exactly remember the show fondly.

by Anonymousreply 43December 10, 2022 12:51 AM

Nells and Almonso were secret lovers

by Anonymousreply 44December 10, 2022 1:56 AM

Something I never thought I would say - but just went down the Radames Pera rabbit hole. I never knew he was young "Grasshopper" on Kung Fu.

I also discovered that Landon was going to put the blind story on hold indefinitely and have Mary marry Pera's John. Landon certainly did not follow the books, but hard to imagine he would just completely ignore Mary's blindness. I know people married younger then, but thought it was a bit odd how young Landon had Mary get married. She was about 14 or 15 when they were toying with having her marry John and about 16 when pairing her with Linwood's Adam who was in his twenties. Plus, they really could have just focused on her adjusting to her blindness for a while instead of having her adjust enough to be able to be a teacher within one episode.

Obviously, Laura was going to get involved with Almanzo at some point, but it was still odd how Landon did it. Laura was about 15 but acting like she was twelve running around in braids chasing someone also well into his 20's. Again, I know the age difference was probably accurate, but was always a bit odd watching the young actresses who were still clearly girls play opposite actors who would be arrested if they were with them in real life.

The whole show is kind of an interesting look into Landon's psyche.

I am Landon's desire to see the teenage actresses playing my daughters have romantic scenes with adult men even when in Mary's case, it was not really necessary to the show.

I am also the really close friend who is a guest star in an episode who is never mentioned again.

by Anonymousreply 45December 10, 2022 3:59 AM

I'm Percival Dalton, Walnut Grove's 1st ever AIDS case!

Doc Baker has no clue how to treat me.

by Anonymousreply 46December 10, 2022 4:03 AM

Has there ever been an objective biography of Landon? He seems like one of the more twisted cases in Hollywood. For Hollywood.

by Anonymousreply 47December 10, 2022 4:15 AM

I'm calico.

by Anonymousreply 48December 10, 2022 4:18 AM

I'm dead Albert Ingalls as opposed to the one who comes back to Walnut Grove as Dr. Albert Ingall's

by Anonymousreply 49December 10, 2022 4:20 AM

Ingalls*

by Anonymousreply 50December 10, 2022 4:21 AM

I'm the shitbra that Melissa Gilbert was terrorized with whenever she flubbed her lines.

Many years later Melissa would use me on her own children.

by Anonymousreply 51December 10, 2022 4:22 AM

I'm Annabelle, Nels estranged, obese sister in the traveling circus.

by Anonymousreply 52December 10, 2022 4:24 AM

I’m the lemon verbena cologne Miss Beadle wears.

by Anonymousreply 53December 10, 2022 4:25 AM

R36, read Allison (Nellie) book, Confessions of a Prairie Bitch. The real bitch was Miss Mary,

by Anonymousreply 54December 10, 2022 4:27 AM

I'm Nellie's vast doll collection, the Ingalls girls play with horse turds.

by Anonymousreply 55December 10, 2022 5:11 AM

Karen Grassle (Ma) didn't mince words when reflecting on Michael Landon's on-set antics back then.

It wasn’t long before the rest of the cast and crew discovered the reason behind his boastful claims: The married actor was having sex with most of the cast members under the age of 18 . He was acting like a horny teenager even though he was pushing 50 years old. His libido was certainly off the rails says Grassle. He never even tried to fuck me. Not even once during all of the years we worked together. I was just old seafood to him. Melissa Gilbert didn’t get any either. That kind of made the harsh reality of being rejected because of my age easier to swallow. Mike didn’t like Gilbert’s gray teeth. He said they were a real wood killer.

by Anonymousreply 56December 10, 2022 11:30 AM

So he didn't need the butternut squash fleshlight then R56?

by Anonymousreply 57December 10, 2022 11:31 AM

r57 no and he didn't need karen grassle either. she was just old seafood.

by Anonymousreply 58December 10, 2022 11:38 AM

I'm the "other" schoolhouse for "special" kids. Although I'm never shown, those kids had to go somewhere when their issue-of-the-week plotlines wrapped up.

by Anonymousreply 59December 10, 2022 11:39 AM

r 59 shannon d. went there

by Anonymousreply 60December 10, 2022 11:43 AM

I'm Elissa, Carrie's imaginary friend. We're both kind of feeble-minded.

by Anonymousreply 61December 10, 2022 11:52 AM

I'm Manly and John's trip to San Francisco.

"Meanwhile, John and Almanzo head off to San Francisco on a business trip, and the danger and bustle of the big city present an exasperating string of events that these two country men are not prepared for."

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by Anonymousreply 62December 10, 2022 11:59 AM

I'm Ma's brown eggs that Mrs. Oleson says aren't worth the same price as white eggs.

by Anonymousreply 63December 10, 2022 12:00 PM

Which led to the crossover episode with The Jeffersons. ^^^^^

by Anonymousreply 64December 10, 2022 12:02 PM

I’m Adam Charles Holbrook Kendall, Jr., dead infant son of Mary and Adam.

After perusing this thread, I’ve joined forces with dozens of other dead babies, typhoid victims, murdered clowns, fat shamed circus performers, and bullied schoolchildren in a class action lawsuit against the town of Walnut Grove. We will be represented by Keyrock, Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer.

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by Anonymousreply 65December 10, 2022 1:02 PM

I’m the penny candy in the general store.

What is this hygiene of which you speak?

by Anonymousreply 66December 10, 2022 1:12 PM

Lol r66 😆

by Anonymousreply 67December 10, 2022 1:18 PM

I'm Pa Ingalls's shirtless scenes that showed off his manly pecs that made my little house on the prairie go full walnut grove.

by Anonymousreply 68December 10, 2022 1:21 PM

R14- LOL

That's such a snarky( datalounge) thing to say-

and I approve!

by Anonymousreply 69December 10, 2022 1:27 PM

R52- They never explain how Annabelle picked up that New York accent.

by Anonymousreply 70December 10, 2022 1:29 PM

Nels gets fed up and finally admits Annabelle is his sister

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by Anonymousreply 71December 10, 2022 1:34 PM

I’m one of the many willowy farm twinks that populate hero township. Do you like my new shag cut?

by Anonymousreply 72December 10, 2022 1:48 PM

When I was little I’d start crying when it came on. I hated it.

by Anonymousreply 73December 10, 2022 4:26 PM

I had no idea "Hero Township" referred to an actual place. I always thought it was 19th century speak for "our town" or something like that.

Walnut Grove is located in North Hero Township, Minnesota.

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by Anonymousreply 74December 10, 2022 10:12 PM

I told you I saw something nasty in the wood shed.

by Anonymousreply 75December 10, 2022 10:18 PM

I'm Miss Peel, the backwoods lady preacher who calls out Mary as a Jezebel! Jezebel!

by Anonymousreply 76December 10, 2022 10:25 PM

I'm Zaldamo

by Anonymousreply 77December 11, 2022 8:00 PM

I bet harriett forced Nancy to eat her pussy

by Anonymousreply 78December 11, 2022 8:41 PM

I’m Adam’s regained sight, and. I’m prancing, prancing, prancing merrily through the woods

by Anonymousreply 79December 11, 2022 8:49 PM

Carrie forced Lamanzo to get her pregnant

by Anonymousreply 80December 11, 2022 9:03 PM

Why were townsfolk constantly adopting children?

Cheap labor?

by Anonymousreply 81December 11, 2022 9:06 PM

I'm the Lake Kezia Monster.

by Anonymousreply 82December 11, 2022 10:08 PM

I'm cinnamon chicken.

by Anonymousreply 83December 12, 2022 9:49 AM

I'm Dumb Abel. I look like I'm 40, but I was really underage when I played the part, unlike many child actors.

Pa Ingalls used to take my dad when he was younger and working on the Ponderosa Ranch. I bet he was counting the days until I turned 18 so he could work on the next generation.

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by Anonymousreply 84December 12, 2022 12:51 PM

I’m Hester Sue, the token black woman. Charles secretly likes some dark meat on occasion.

by Anonymousreply 85December 12, 2022 1:46 PM

I'm Nellie's black wig, purchased for the Walnut Grove School's production of Little Women. I'm a leftover from Jan's identity episode of The Brady Bunch.

by Anonymousreply 86December 12, 2022 4:02 PM

I’m Michael Landon’s ego.

by Anonymousreply 87December 12, 2022 4:18 PM

Did anyone watch that other show he was on Highway to Heaven? I was really disappointed

by Anonymousreply 88December 12, 2022 6:12 PM

R88 no I didn’t watch that shit

by Anonymousreply 89December 12, 2022 6:14 PM

I'm Lou, the jailed midget, who rescued Nancy (OG to Baby Jessica) from the well.

by Anonymousreply 90December 12, 2022 8:19 PM

Highway To Heaven was just as fun and campy as Little House but with an extreme weird bent and increasingly more bizarre and out there episodes as the show.

Any given episode would focus on Jonathan (Landon's angel character) becoming a bloodthirsty werewolf to some fat chick driving all over town buying dozens of donuts but lying and saying they were for her sorority sisters (that fat bitch won't in no sorority) to a very young Mark-Paul Gosselaar dressing up as a Nazi and mauling his father down with an uzi!

by Anonymousreply 91December 12, 2022 9:09 PM

Damn it sounds like maybe I gave up on Highway to Heaven too soon

by Anonymousreply 92December 13, 2022 12:20 AM

I am the deadly winters. Every single fucking winter...deadly.

Seriously, why the fuck did these people choose to live in hellholes (iceholes) like these dumb bitches did their entire lives? Go WEST wasn't a gentle suggestion. Dumbfucks. They could have put their tootsies up in California and wanted for little. But no. They got off on the shit weather and being poor. Kinky, and not in a good way.

by Anonymousreply 93December 13, 2022 1:06 AM

Christ R84. That is one old looking 17 year old

by Anonymousreply 94December 13, 2022 2:03 AM

I’m the anthrax

by Anonymousreply 95December 13, 2022 2:14 AM

Was Michael Landon high all the time?

by Anonymousreply 96December 13, 2022 2:24 AM

R91- WRONG 😑

Highway To Heaven was a syrupy sappy show with NONE of the charm of Little House On The Prairie.

I’m the first queen 👸 on this thread who’s not too lazy to write ✍️ out the full name of the show.

by Anonymousreply 97December 13, 2022 3:34 AM

I'm Doc Baker who is using that new experimental technique to treat women with hysteria. Thank the Lord Mrs. Oleson hasn't asked for the treatment yet. However, I think a DLer on this thread could use the treatment.

by Anonymousreply 98December 13, 2022 3:59 AM

Verbatim what I was going to say, R84. Poor guy was going bald at 17. I seriously thought he was in his 30s

by Anonymousreply 99December 13, 2022 5:52 AM

Sorry, meant for R94

by Anonymousreply 100December 13, 2022 5:53 AM

Saved By The Bell: The Third Reich

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by Anonymousreply 101December 13, 2022 8:16 AM

Ja wohl, Herr Belding!

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by Anonymousreply 102December 13, 2022 8:17 AM

[84] & [93] The old looking 17 year old is Dan Blocker’s son Dirk.

by Anonymousreply 103December 13, 2022 1:02 PM

I prefer Beta Blocker's son Cock.

by Anonymousreply 104December 13, 2022 1:59 PM

I’m Carrie in her little bed, 2ft. away from the big bed where Pa lies on top of Ma. I’ve seen things.

by Anonymousreply 105December 13, 2022 2:25 PM

R105- She was more or less just a prop on the show. No story lines ever really revolved around Carry- at least nothing that viewers ever cared about.

by Anonymousreply 106December 13, 2022 2:48 PM

[quote] Why were townsfolk constantly adopting children?

I know you were probably joking. But there is a history of this.

I found a bunch of ancestors in Iowa when I did my family tree research. When I did, I learned that there was a history of orphan children from big cities like NYC being put on a train and sent to Iowa and the like. Often, families would take a child if the train stopped at their town's train whistle stop.

My family wasn't among the orphans but it was fascinating to read about it. This would have been roughly the era when Little House took place.

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by Anonymousreply 107December 13, 2022 3:01 PM

also

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by Anonymousreply 108December 13, 2022 3:06 PM

Carrie was molested

by Anonymousreply 109December 13, 2022 3:29 PM

Carrie was retarded

by Anonymousreply 110December 13, 2022 3:59 PM

And she didn't get any smarter when she moved to New York.

by Anonymousreply 111December 13, 2022 4:49 PM

I'm the spinoff Michael Landon should have created --of all characters it was about Carrie. The real Carrie Ingalls had a functioning brain and could speak in complete sentences. She was a career gal when such people were rare. She worked in the newspaper industry. She also had her own homestead claim and was an amateur photographer. She eventually married in her 40s and became a stepmother to her husband's two children.

Her life was a lot more interesting than Laura's...who married a loser just like her father.

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by Anonymousreply 112December 14, 2022 1:10 AM

I'm G-G-G-G-Gid-d-d-d-eon.

A year later, I would go on to shoot my eye old as Ralphie.

by Anonymousreply 113December 14, 2022 1:21 AM

I’m the lack of modern conveniences

by Anonymousreply 114December 14, 2022 1:52 AM

I'm Willie and I'm always running to or from the OUTHOUSE.

by Anonymousreply 115December 14, 2022 2:33 AM

r112 Interesting article. Good for her.

But god that entire family looked like a miserable fucking bunch.

by Anonymousreply 116December 14, 2022 4:19 AM

I’m Pa’s fiddle, the only source of music and entertainment in the house. I am only played by Pa because he never taught the kids how to play.

by Anonymousreply 117December 14, 2022 4:29 AM

I’m Adam Kendall Jr, the flaming-est tot in Walnut Grove

by Anonymousreply 118December 14, 2022 5:42 AM

R112, and Carrie's husband was one of the Mt. Rushmore sculptors.

by Anonymousreply 119December 14, 2022 11:56 AM

The Fuck! Where's the Carrie Ingals biopic?

by Anonymousreply 120December 14, 2022 12:07 PM

R119 she had a fascinating life

by Anonymousreply 121December 14, 2022 12:50 PM

I want a true Little House series.

Ma & Pa constantly on the run trying to stay one step ahead of the creditors. Manly being a lazy bum while barely literate Laura attempts to teach children. Carrie being the intelligent, accomplished one....

by Anonymousreply 122December 14, 2022 12:55 PM

The REAL Laura Ingalls Wilder was born in 1867 and lived until 1957. She lived until the age of 90. Life was so primitive in 1877- anywhere in the world. By 1957 there had been profound technological changes- in her lifetime.

by Anonymousreply 123December 14, 2022 1:13 PM

I am Pa's hairdo. Everybody else's hair got a brush or two before filming, but only my hair is long, wavey and luscious. You know, exactly what you would expect from a poor farmer in the 19th century.

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by Anonymousreply 124December 14, 2022 1:37 PM

R124- But it is what you would expect from Network television ca. 1975.

by Anonymousreply 125December 14, 2022 1:42 PM

R122 That would be interesting but I think her estate has probably drifted into that sort of hyper Trumper Americana, where any attempt to revisit would be met with screams of "WOKE!"

They probably want to keep the Ingalls Wilder legacy right where it is/was.

by Anonymousreply 126December 14, 2022 2:15 PM

It's amazing she lived to 90 as she was diabetic, but not diagnosed until age 89.

by Anonymousreply 127December 14, 2022 2:27 PM

There's an interesting book called Pioneer Girl: an annotated autobiography.

by Anonymousreply 128December 14, 2022 2:31 PM

[Quote]Why were townsfolk constantly adopting children? Cheap labor?

Marilla and Matthew in "Anne of Green Gables" wanted to adopt a boy to help with the farm work, so that was probably a factor for some.

by Anonymousreply 129December 14, 2022 2:42 PM

[quote] Joan Collin's wig collection

Oh, dear.

by Anonymousreply 130December 14, 2022 2:47 PM

Fuck Joan Collins and her tatty-assed clumps of hair you dare call a wig.

Why my luxurious hairpieces are both chic and always camera ready!

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by Anonymousreply 131December 14, 2022 3:02 PM

I'm Michael Landon and his buddies, sitting on the sidelines between takes, saying horribly misogynistic things about women.

by Anonymousreply 132December 14, 2022 3:10 PM

I'm the same Michael Landon a few hours later, grateful that one of those awful cunts I talked about earlier was willing to slobber all over my fat cock.

by Anonymousreply 133December 14, 2022 3:17 PM

I'm the same Michael Landon a few days later showing up on the red carpet with my wife, pretending to be the most wholesome man in America .

by Anonymousreply 134December 14, 2022 3:37 PM

We used carrots as sex toys

by Anonymousreply 135December 14, 2022 3:52 PM

R135- I've used carrots in the past as sex toys.

by Anonymousreply 136December 14, 2022 3:58 PM

Hi almanzo r136

by Anonymousreply 137December 14, 2022 4:01 PM

Didn't Michael threaten to write one of them out if they didn't stop making demands?

by Anonymousreply 138December 14, 2022 4:03 PM

I'm the peeping Toms who caused Ellen's death. We got off scott-free

by Anonymousreply 139December 14, 2022 4:48 PM

[quote]I've used carrots in the past as sex toys.

Thanks for sharing, Freaketta.

by Anonymousreply 140December 14, 2022 6:34 PM

Little Carrie on the prairie couldn't act and had a bush that was pretty hairy.

by Anonymousreply 141December 21, 2022 8:17 PM

I'm the redhead from Days of Our Lives who tempts Nels when he becomes a traveling salesman.

by Anonymousreply 142December 21, 2022 8:25 PM

Half pint has a best friend on todays episode on Cozi. It’s a 60 yr old man she goes fishing with every time the two of them can find time to meet by the stream deep in the woods. Why would a 10 yr old girl spend that much time alone with an adult man?

by Anonymousreply 143March 12, 2023 6:51 PM

Who in the hell would want to live in a dusty ass place like Walnut Grove? It was a shithole!

by Anonymousreply 144March 12, 2023 7:15 PM

And where was the walnut grove? Did we ever see so much as a single walnut tree?

I wasn't by money back!

by Anonymousreply 145March 12, 2023 7:29 PM

If you're a fan of the books I recommend The Wilder Life by Wendy McLure. She does a year long pilgrimage to all the sites and she's really funny.

by Anonymousreply 146March 12, 2023 7:43 PM

R146 Does she acknowledge what a farce the whole thing was and how it was really ridiculous?

by Anonymousreply 147March 12, 2023 8:15 PM

"Pioneer Girl" by Beth/Bich Minh Nguyen also centers around the Ingalls Wilder mythos. Recommended.

by Anonymousreply 148March 12, 2023 9:57 PM

A bit a r147. It's a lot about the fandom and how these little towns depend on them

by Anonymousreply 149March 12, 2023 10:16 PM

i’m Bunny (the horse)

by Anonymousreply 150March 12, 2023 11:36 PM

He raped me

by Anonymousreply 151May 14, 2023 8:27 PM

Worst characters on TV

Mary was a mean ass bitch and blind

Laura was a do-gooder but in reality she was a bitch

Nellie - self explanatory

Harriett - self explanatory

by Anonymousreply 152May 14, 2023 8:32 PM

Nellie and Harriet were two of the BEST characters ever on TV, R152. Put on this dunce cap and go stand in the corner!

by Anonymousreply 153May 15, 2023 12:26 AM

No thanks they were all prairie bitches

by Anonymousreply 154May 15, 2023 12:29 AM

[Quote] He never even tried to fuck me. Not even once during all of the years we worked together. I was just old seafood to him. Melissa Gilbert didn’t get any either

Grassle spoke her mind about Landon, didn’t she?

by Anonymousreply 155May 15, 2023 10:01 PM

Grassle knew all of the gossip on the set and was obviously into every member of the cast’s shit.

by Anonymousreply 156May 21, 2023 4:09 PM

Michael Landon never wore underwear on Bonanza either. This set photo shows little Joe wasn't little at all!

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by Anonymousreply 157May 21, 2023 4:19 PM

Karen Grassle said she was old seafood to Landon and Melissa Gilbert didn't get any either. That leaves Melissa Sue Anderson and the actress who played Miss Beadle possibly taking a roll in the hay with Pa Ingalls. I don't think Alison Arngrim got any either.

by Anonymousreply 158May 21, 2023 4:21 PM

R158 what about Shannon Dorety?

by Anonymousreply 159May 21, 2023 4:23 PM

R158 Melissa Sue always had a chip on her shoulder.

by Anonymousreply 160May 21, 2023 4:24 PM

That ugly little bitch who played the show’s klutz- Carrie always seemed like she would bring you bad luck if you spent time around her.

by Anonymousreply 161May 21, 2023 4:25 PM

Charlotte Stewart (Miss Beadle) said Landon was flirtatious with her during her audition, but she thought it wouldn't be a good idea to sleep with someone who would be her boss. She still was hired anyway.

She did sleep with Victor French (Mr. Edwards) at some point though and said he was a good lover.

by Anonymousreply 162May 21, 2023 4:29 PM

Charlotte Stewart used to finger her pussy in between scenes under her school desk.

by Anonymousreply 163May 21, 2023 8:48 PM

Charlotte Stewart was fuck buddies with Jim Morrison.

by Anonymousreply 164May 22, 2023 12:42 AM

I detest that show. Even as a small child of 3 or 4 yrs old I’d throw a major tantrum if it came on tv. My mom knew to turn the channel fast.

by Anonymousreply 165May 22, 2023 9:55 PM

Okay, my eyesight is going. I read that as “Charlotte Stewart was fuck buddies with Jinx Monsoon…”

by Anonymousreply 166May 23, 2023 12:28 AM

Both statements are true R166. There was more than one student banging Miss Beadle’s erasers after class, if you catch my drift.

by Anonymousreply 167May 23, 2023 12:33 AM

Imagine having fucked both Jim Morrison and Victor French in your life.

by Anonymousreply 168May 24, 2023 11:10 PM

My parents have carpet!

by Anonymousreply 169May 24, 2023 11:15 PM

I’m Nellin Olesen a true American icon. The rapper Nelly chose his name in honor of me and my life’s work.

by Anonymousreply 170May 24, 2023 11:16 PM

I’m the extreme lack of glamour. Ankle length calico and high necklines make everyone look like a schoolmarm.

by Anonymousreply 171May 25, 2023 2:23 AM

I’m Carrie’s foot that flies into the air when I fall down the hill during the opening credits.

by Anonymousreply 172May 25, 2023 3:11 AM

Tasteful friends, you too can live in affordable Walnut Grove. Walk Pa’s path along Plum Creek and commune with your kindred spirit of Nellie Oleson.

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by Anonymousreply 173May 25, 2023 7:02 AM

BUMP!

And not just a cold hell, this place was/is known for temperature shattering cold. I don't get it either.

by Anonymousreply 174May 25, 2023 7:46 AM

I'll be Shannen Doherty's bangs!

by Anonymousreply 175May 25, 2023 11:11 AM

I will be her incredibly distracting crooked face.that only got worse as the years went on.

I should feel bad about this, shouldn't I?

by Anonymousreply 176May 25, 2023 11:34 AM

But her face is gorgeous R176

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by Anonymousreply 177May 25, 2023 11:45 AM

Did Landon fuck her?

by Anonymousreply 178May 25, 2023 2:55 PM

That tv show set must have been ass.

Can you imagine wearing those hot & ugly costumes for what, nine seasons?

by Anonymousreply 179May 25, 2023 3:15 PM

^^^^^

It was a lovely show. I adore it.

by Anonymousreply 180May 26, 2023 7:56 PM

That’s nice r180. Nobody gives a shit.

by Anonymousreply 181May 26, 2023 7:58 PM

You do, because you posted on the thread.

by Anonymousreply 182May 26, 2023 8:02 PM

I used to flick my bean every Monday night when it was on despite the odor

by Anonymousreply 183May 26, 2023 8:16 PM

LHOTP is still relevant 50 years later

by Anonymousreply 184May 26, 2023 10:01 PM

R112, well, hey... I had no idea that a) Carrie was a real person (Landon futzed with many facts), that b) Carrie lived such an interesting life, and that c) Mary was sent to live with Carrie so late in life. Taking in Mary is quite generous of Carrie's husband... I wonder if Mary could contribute in some way financially.

by Anonymousreply 185May 26, 2023 10:21 PM

Mary was BLIND!

by Anonymousreply 186May 26, 2023 10:22 PM

The PBS documentary about pa being a loser was interesting

by Anonymousreply 187May 26, 2023 10:44 PM

Pa was also a child molester

by Anonymousreply 188May 26, 2023 10:59 PM

Michael Landon or the real pa?

by Anonymousreply 189May 26, 2023 11:55 PM

Both but not with Gilbert or Grassle

by Anonymousreply 190May 27, 2023 12:01 AM

I’m Carrie wiping out in the opening credits. Stop laughing. It’s not “cute”. It fucking hurt. Fuck you all.

by Anonymousreply 191May 27, 2023 1:04 AM

Did pa molest Nellie?

by Anonymousreply 192May 27, 2023 3:12 AM

I wonder if Nancy was a real character too.

by Anonymousreply 193May 27, 2023 6:30 AM

Nancy was a twat

by Anonymousreply 194May 27, 2023 9:54 AM

I'm Jack -the very cute dog

by Anonymousreply 195May 27, 2023 1:51 PM

The only thing I liked about Nancy was when she wrote a report for school called “why Jesus loves me more than most”

by Anonymousreply 196May 27, 2023 6:13 PM

😂😂😂 I don't remember that particular episode R196, but that was just like Nancy.

She made Nellie look like a saint by comparison, and Nellie was quite despicable herself.

by Anonymousreply 197May 27, 2023 6:49 PM

R197 who rattled your cage?

by Anonymousreply 198May 27, 2023 8:29 PM

Pa was a loser moving his family from one place to another an unbelievable number of times before finally settling in De Smet, South Dakota where he died and got the biggest gravestone of course. Selfish to the end.

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by Anonymousreply 199May 27, 2023 9:10 PM

A lot of bitches

by Anonymousreply 200May 27, 2023 9:22 PM

Why did he finally stay in South Dakota? Is it very beautiful?

by Anonymousreply 201May 27, 2023 9:58 PM

South Dakota, beautiful? LOL!

Charles Ingalls stayed in DeSmet because he repeatedly failed to establish himself as a provider for his family across Wisconsin, Minnesota, Kansas and Iowa ... he finally managed to eke out a subsistence in DeSmet, and it was increasingly less easy to pick up stakes again especially given he and Caroline had a blind adult daughter in their care.

The LIW bio "Prairie Fires" paints what seems like an honest portrait of the family, deconstructing all the mythos around them driven by Laura's books and the show. Walnut Grove MN was not the warm, close-knit community portrayed by Landon -- in fact it was a transient town with a lot of unsavory types, and the family, especially Laura, did not like it there.

by Anonymousreply 202May 28, 2023 12:41 AM

Mrs. Oleson R198

She was responsible for Nellie and Nancy having those Karen personalities.

by Anonymousreply 203May 29, 2023 3:23 PM

I'm the 1979 TV movie "Little House Years" -- no one remembers me or gives a shit.

by Anonymousreply 204May 29, 2023 3:36 PM

I'm the weird out of tune instrument bleating just before Carrie Carrie falls down in the opening credits. They kept my weird honk in the soundtrack for years.

by Anonymousreply 205May 29, 2023 3:39 PM

I'm Merle Olson. Tired as fuck of people calling me Merle Oberon.

by Anonymousreply 206May 29, 2023 3:42 PM

R205 they even kept me around on the VHS releases!

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by Anonymousreply 207May 29, 2023 3:49 PM

I'm The Waltons. We were for the folks who couldn't abide the prurience and controversy of Little House.

by Anonymousreply 208May 29, 2023 8:35 PM

R202 ‘Prairie Fires’ is a fascinating read because touches on the historical and economic context of the times and doesn’t sugar-coat the Ingalls family. Life was harsh. Pa Ingalls was in the last wave of true frontier settlers, and his family suffered from a series of his bad decisions, bad timing and bad luck. So many dodgy things like illegally settling on Osage land in Kansas to sneaking out of Iowa in the middle of the night due to debts. Pa was constantly in debt, so much so that property had to be later put in Ma’s name. They seemed really susceptible to ‘get rich quick’ kind of schemes. At one point in De Smet well past their prime, he proposed going to Oregon, but Ma put finally her foot down. She had enough and would rather stay in hard bleakness South Dakota than fail yet again. I’m retrospect, they should have really stayed in the Wisconsin Big Woods near Pepin Lake. Their life was the most stable there and had an extended family support.

Laura and Manly followed in the same footsteps with financial ruin in their first year of marriage and then falling for some scheme to move to the Florida panhandle that lasted only for a year. It look them years to recover enough to get their shit together and finally settle in the Missouri Ozarks. The property had to be put in Laura’s name because Manly likely still had outstanding debts. The TV show especially was a fairy tale version, and Laura wasn’t always a very nice person in real life. Fun fact. Despite having five children, Pa has no living descendants. His only grandchild to make it adulthood was Rose (died 1968) who had one stillborn child. Their line has physically died out, but we still talk about them thanks to Half Pint.

by Anonymousreply 209June 1, 2023 6:58 AM

In what ways was Laura not a very nice person, R209?

by Anonymousreply 210June 1, 2023 7:47 AM

R210 She was complex and not as always noble as portrayed in the show. Much of the insight comes from her own daughter Rose. Once Laura chillingly accused a young Rose of taking their hidden stash of money on the road to Missouri when in fact it had fallen down a crack in a desk. They found it three days later. It traumatised Rose for life and Laura refused to speak about it afterwards. There were other stories like how there was a family literally starving after the Panic of 1893, and Laura got angry with Manly when he gave them some salted meat.

As a child Laura was resentful of (before blind) Mary because the elder sister got more attention for her looks and piety. Laura also took pleasure in the failings of her sister in law Eliza Jane, although EJ was supposedly full of herself, including when Eliza Jane became almost destitute.. There’s countless stories of Laura throwing barbs in the book.

They were all racists like most people then. They moved into MN not long after the Dakota War of 1862 that ultimately led to the mass killing or removal of most Native Americans in the state. This mentality carried over to their move to Dakota Territory. Laura and Manly also moved to Mansfield, MO which was a ‘sundown town’.

by Anonymousreply 211June 1, 2023 2:01 PM

What happened to Almanzo's family? From the book Farmer Boy, his family sounded pretty loaded. Did they fall apart too?

I know large parts of the books were more fiction than fact, so trying to keep that in mind.

by Anonymousreply 212June 1, 2023 2:16 PM

Yeah, Laura wasn’t nice. Their fam wasn’t all noble and Christ like either. They were assholes.

by Anonymousreply 213June 1, 2023 5:12 PM

It was soap opera tv set back in the late 1800s that’s all. The prairie life. No big whoop.

by Anonymousreply 214June 1, 2023 5:23 PM

Grassle wasn’t really all taken in by Gilbert or Landon. She wasn’t very bright but knew a snow job when she saw one.

by Anonymousreply 215June 1, 2023 5:28 PM

Lol I just asked my mom what her thoughts are on Grassle. She thought I was asking for her thoughts on asshole? Lol

by Anonymousreply 216June 1, 2023 5:35 PM

Oh god she’s teaching families sign language out in the prairie

by Anonymousreply 217June 1, 2023 7:24 PM

If I saw her braided head signing I’d show her my idea of sign language- my middle finger

by Anonymousreply 218June 1, 2023 7:25 PM

Why did Karen Grassle‘s career go straight down the shitter?

by Anonymousreply 219June 1, 2023 11:58 PM

r212, I believe Eliza Jane convinced her aging parents to move to Louisiana and invest in farming there. They lost it all and died broke.

Eliza Jane married and had a son when she was in her 40s. I think her son reproduced, so she could have living descendants.

by Anonymousreply 220June 2, 2023 2:18 AM

R220 Seriously? What idiots. In the book (again for what that was worth) they had it so good, and the father seemed to rule with a fair but firm hand. Interesting they/he would listen to a female back in those days. Where did you find this? I want to learn more.

Why the harsher part(s) of the south is another question why not California? "Manly" and Laura got hornswaggled into swampland in Florida on top of it. How dreadful.

by Anonymousreply 221June 2, 2023 2:31 AM

I'm the cracked porcelain doll and the matching dresses ma made with the fabric she traded for eggs.

by Anonymousreply 222June 2, 2023 2:37 AM

I'm toilet water.

by Anonymousreply 223June 2, 2023 2:42 AM

r221, this is one mention of it, but I know I read a more detailed account somewhere else.

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by Anonymousreply 224June 2, 2023 2:56 AM

I am the shared bath. Pa takes one first so he gets the clean hot bathwater, then (in the same bathwater) Ma, then Mary, then Laura, and then Carrie. The water is black with dirt after Pa.

by Anonymousreply 225June 2, 2023 2:59 AM

Here’s the info from “Prairie Fire’ about Almonzo’s parents and their move to Louisiana. I think there were six or seven children in the Wilder family. Google says Almanzo’s mother died in 1905 in Louisiana, so she must have stayed after her husband died in 1899. Both Eliza Jane and the youngest Perley Day Wilder were there. Perley had lots of children, so the Wilders did better than the Ingalls in that regard. Info from Find a Grave that links to the whole family.

“Almanzo’s parents, James and Angeline, and his oldest sibling, Laura, spent that summer with them, stopping in Mansfield on their way south. They had sold their farm in Minnesota and were moving to Crowley, Louisiana, to live with Eliza Jane, who had had lasted only a year or so at her government job. In 1893, at the age of forty-two, she had married Thomas Jefferson Thayer, a widower in his sixties with five grown children and a modest fortune gleaned from his Spring Valley grain elevator. The couple promptly moved to Louisiana and went into rice farming there. Perhaps against his better judgment, the sober and conservative James Wilder had been persuaded to invest much of his wealth—the profits of long years of farming and the proceeds from sales of his Minnesota properties—in the Thayers’ rice farming schemes, which collapsed with the first bad harvest. Eighty-five, thin and frail, the elder Wilder realized that most of his investment would be lost. But he had done what he could for Almanzo, buying the Mansfield home that he and Laura were renting and presenting the deed to his son just before leaving town. He died several months later.”

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by Anonymousreply 226June 2, 2023 6:37 AM

Half pint was kind of a bad luck charm.

by Anonymousreply 227June 2, 2023 10:57 AM

Wow, the REAL Caroline Ingalls was born in 1839. When she died in 1924 she was 84 or 85 years old.

by Anonymousreply 228June 2, 2023 12:37 PM

I’m those matching cornflower blue Sunday dresses Ma made.

by Anonymousreply 229June 2, 2023 7:16 PM

“ I'm the weird out of tune instrument bleating just before Carrie Carrie falls down in the opening credits. They kept my weird honk in the soundtrack for years.”

What was that? It always bothered me.

by Anonymousreply 230June 2, 2023 9:49 PM

R230 - Gabriel's horn, Rose.

by Anonymousreply 231June 2, 2023 9:51 PM

I’m the battery operated flashlights goof

by Anonymousreply 232June 3, 2023 12:05 AM

I’m r207, captured in the reflection of the television screen from which he was faithfully recording his VHS tapes to his iPhone.

by Anonymousreply 233June 3, 2023 12:08 AM

R224- In real life it seems she was not a nice person but on the tv show she was quite a pleasant gawky person.

by Anonymousreply 234June 3, 2023 2:20 AM

I'm the Little House Cookbook (it's real!) Turn to page 61 for Ma's LARD N' CRACKLIN'S!

by Anonymousreply 235June 16, 2023 9:02 PM

Is there a recipe for blackbirds, r235? They ate them in one of the books as Pa was shooting them to stop them from eating his crops.

by Anonymousreply 236June 18, 2023 1:16 PM

I'm gingham.

by Anonymousreply 237June 18, 2023 1:20 PM

R236 "Four and twenty blackbirds, baked in a pie . . . "

by Anonymousreply 238June 18, 2023 1:31 PM

I am Patrick Laborteaux, who played Andrew Garvey. I will one day star as Ram in HEATHERS, and secure gay iconhood, through my father's line: I love my dead gay son.

by Anonymousreply 239June 18, 2023 1:44 PM

I am Sean Penn who played a kid from Walnut Grove in a single episode.

by Anonymousreply 240June 18, 2023 1:47 PM

yeah, but the blackbirds were alive, r238. The base was baked, and they'd put the, drunk on raisins soaked in liquor, blackbirds in and cover them with dough, which was broiled on top. The nursery rhyme even says "The birds began to sing".

I would guess they cooked them like any small game bird, because PA was no King.

by Anonymousreply 241June 18, 2023 1:47 PM

As always, I am Patricia Neal, Julia Sanderson, a dying widow, in 2 episodes. I fought back from a stroke just to play the reason Mr. Edwards marries Grace, to raise my kids. Kyle Richards plays my daughter, lucky her.

by Anonymousreply 242June 18, 2023 1:54 PM

I'm Jason Bateman, who appeared in seasons 7 and 8. Yes, I have been around a LONG time.

by Anonymousreply 243June 18, 2023 2:04 PM

I’m Grassle

by Anonymousreply 244June 18, 2023 2:13 PM

I'm the feud between Melissa Sue Anderson and Melissa Gilbert.

by Anonymousreply 245June 18, 2023 8:02 PM

Reading "Prairie Fires" now. It is fascinating. All off the goody goody shit has been stripped from the books. Turns out half-pint was something of a cunt who resented Almanzo because he had the fucking NERVE to get diphtheria and almost die. Her jealousy of her daughter Rose was/is really one for the psych texts. Laura didn't keep her harsh feelings about them too close to her chest either.

But what I found very interesting is when she started writing in earnest (with help from Rose), it was in roughly the same timeline as the Chicago World's fair; L. Frank Baum writing the Wizard of Oz and Deadwood being founded. In fact Anne Oakley and Buffalo Bill made some good money doing exhibitions at the World's Fair. I encourage you to put this book on your must read list if for no other reason than it is an excellent historical piece that fills in the gaps around the hapless Ingalls/Wilder tribe. One thing, Almanzo's folks actually did much better after they moved than other accounts say and lived quite a good life. Laura, with her family nearly starving refused to ask for their help. What. A. Bitch. And Almanzo was not much better. Pride goeth before a fall and all that...

by Anonymousreply 246June 20, 2023 8:36 AM

OK, Almanzo's dad didn't exactly fully thrive in Louisiana, but by most accounts he didn't go totally tits up until he did at 86. Not too shabby for a man his age back then. Before he died he bought the rather nice house that Laura and Almanzo were renting while working in town doing, anyone? Odd jobs to save up some cash. He gave his son the deed a few months before he died. Back home, Pa Ingalls was doing....not much. Playing the same tunes on a fiddle can only go so far, Caroline must have been a saint, or she was dickmatized.

by Anonymousreply 247June 20, 2023 9:01 AM

I am the nightmares of little kid viewers, after the ep when wild dogs force Mary, Laura and Albert to hide in the high part of the barn, and fear that Toto would get eaten up. Landon had a sick mind.

by Anonymousreply 248June 20, 2023 9:04 AM
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