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Let's be Qatar!

I'm evil. Pure fucking evil. I'm everywhere.

by Anonymousreply 52November 25, 2022 6:00 PM

I'm horrible Anglo expats from the UK, South Africa and Australia, braying about how jolly it is to finally have a maid who really puts her back into it.

by Anonymousreply 1November 23, 2022 2:43 PM

I'm gold-plating. I adorn unlikely things, such as breakfast muffins, toilet paper and band-aids.

by Anonymousreply 2November 23, 2022 2:44 PM

I'm Morgan Freeman, selling right the fuck out.

by Anonymousreply 3November 23, 2022 2:45 PM

I'm Dantean levels of architectural horror.

by Anonymousreply 4November 23, 2022 2:46 PM

I'm workers washing in a Turkish toilet (hole in floor) because there is no shower.

by Anonymousreply 5November 23, 2022 2:47 PM

I'm no beer. Surprise!

by Anonymousreply 6November 23, 2022 2:47 PM

I'm the deadly Kafala system. Half step up from slavery.

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by Anonymousreply 7November 23, 2022 2:49 PM

I foster terrible human rights violations, yet at the same time I’m too high minded to allow the drinking of beer in my stadiums.

by Anonymousreply 8November 23, 2022 2:49 PM

I'm the al Thani family, counting our $75 million that we bilked out of Budweiser while laughing at the stupid, gullible Westerners.

by Anonymousreply 9November 23, 2022 2:50 PM

We’re four official tops in your hotel room, and we’re ready to par-tea!

by Anonymousreply 10November 23, 2022 2:50 PM

R7 Kafala, practiced all over the Gulf and Middle East is not "half a step up from slavery". It is the continuation of the identical slavery practiced by Muslims over a millennium.

by Anonymousreply 11November 23, 2022 2:52 PM

I'm a stadium shaped like a gigantic cunt.

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by Anonymousreply 12November 23, 2022 2:52 PM

I'm HAF Sheikh Mohammed bin Hamad bin Khalifa al Thani

Just don't think about the 3 million slaves in my realm. Or do, if that gets you off!

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by Anonymousreply 13November 23, 2022 2:53 PM

I'm your passport. You won't be seeing me again for a while.

by Anonymousreply 14November 23, 2022 2:54 PM

I'm David Beckham, I'm a shitbag.

by Anonymousreply 15November 23, 2022 2:55 PM

I'm the grim urban hellscape that extends in every direction until the next equally fucked up country.

by Anonymousreply 16November 23, 2022 2:55 PM

I'm 120 degrees in the shade.

There is no shade.

by Anonymousreply 17November 23, 2022 2:56 PM

We're the gay men and women of Qatar. Whose, like gays in every Muslim country, live lives of daily terror at exposure. Who are distraught that the West, who support and champion gay rights, threw us under a bus in fear of a yellow card.

by Anonymousreply 18November 23, 2022 2:58 PM

I'm all of the extravagantly-priced yet tawdry architecture.

by Anonymousreply 19November 23, 2022 2:58 PM

I'm rising sea levels and temperatures.

They're coming to get you, Barbara.

by Anonymousreply 20November 23, 2022 2:58 PM

I'm Steve Bannon, impressed and inspired!

by Anonymousreply 21November 23, 2022 2:59 PM

I’m all the gay sex happening in the royal palace

by Anonymousreply 22November 23, 2022 3:10 PM

I can't decide whether I'm pronounced Ka-tar or Kutter or Gutter. It seems to change day by day.

by Anonymousreply 23November 23, 2022 3:12 PM

I'm the corpses of non Qatar nationals, worked to death on hundreds of unsafe construction sites.

by Anonymousreply 24November 23, 2022 3:14 PM

I’m primitive, ridiculous people running around in gowns murdering each other over slights, riding camels, but then noticing sticky black stuff under the sand.

Then fast forward a century, and I’m the same devious buffoon, but with billions of dollars.

by Anonymousreply 25November 23, 2022 3:14 PM

I'm the shitty muslim religion, second only to christianity in making the world hellish.

by Anonymousreply 26November 23, 2022 3:15 PM

Can you get a hot dog there?

by Anonymousreply 27November 23, 2022 3:15 PM

Sure thing, R27. Lock a poodle in your Porsche for an hour.

by Anonymousreply 28November 23, 2022 3:16 PM

R23 it’s Cut-aR

by Anonymousreply 29November 23, 2022 3:17 PM

Both of which came from Judaism, the most empty and arrogant religion of them all, r26.

by Anonymousreply 30November 23, 2022 3:18 PM

I'm hair-trigger tempers balanced atop a mountain of resentment and the bottomless pit of a national inferiority complex.

by Anonymousreply 31November 23, 2022 3:22 PM

I’m Janet’s undeniable presence.

by Anonymousreply 32November 23, 2022 3:24 PM

I'm a Qatar prince's bodyguards beating the shit out of an Austrian businessman in a hotel bar for not agreeing to fuck him.

by Anonymousreply 33November 23, 2022 3:26 PM

I'm Dubai.

I'm worse.

by Anonymousreply 34November 23, 2022 3:26 PM

I'm the opulent yet dreary and tasteless shopping malls that provide the only activity for the female population.

Those not chained to the vacuum cleaner at home, that is.

by Anonymousreply 35November 23, 2022 3:28 PM

Hoya, oim Jack, from Englund. Oi caime ovah to play football. Oi onlay joost got here, and, uhhh...there’s lowds of sand abowt, ain’t there? Oi weren't sure if it was real or not til oi tooched it. It was sow hot when oi did!

When oi got off the plane, somewon gave me a boonch of roses, as loike, a presunt, sow oi sed, “that’s noice of yow, oi’ll let you fook me if you loike”. Ownlay fair, ya get me?

Yesterdai oi went onna a camel’s back, it wuz big and scarey. To be fair, oi roide big hairy animals in moy spare toime quoite a lot, but usuallay oi do that inna bed...

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by Anonymousreply 36November 23, 2022 3:40 PM

I was going to ask, R34, for a comparison between the biggest/tourist-y city or cities in Qatar and Dubai UAE. People from all over the globe go to Dubai to party and seem to get away with a lot that would technically be forbidden or illegal. Same with Qatar? I mean under everyday circumstances, not necessarily when the World Cup is happening.

by Anonymousreply 37November 23, 2022 3:41 PM

I'm the unlucky few (hopefully) visitors that will run afoul of some Qatari law or rule while at the World Cup and my world will be turned up side down because I happened to be in the wrong place with the wrong authorities and the law will actually be enforced.

We're the residents of Qatar who face such life-altering consequences on a daily basis and in much higher numbers.

by Anonymousreply 38November 23, 2022 3:45 PM

I'm Lindsay Lohan. If you want a beer, you better come with me!

by Anonymousreply 39November 23, 2022 5:24 PM

I'm Nicki Minaj, motionless like a roach in a corner, hoping nobody notices I am part of this shit show while watching Maluma get chased with a can of Raid.

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by Anonymousreply 40November 23, 2022 6:06 PM

what a shit show

by Anonymousreply 41November 23, 2022 6:50 PM

It's like Nazi Olympics 2.0

by Anonymousreply 42November 23, 2022 6:51 PM

[quote] I'm the opulent yet dreary and tasteless shopping malls

Richard Ashcroft said about this years ago tbf. He warned us. Did we fuck listen.

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by Anonymousreply 43November 23, 2022 7:09 PM

I am sand, the only thing passing for nature in this hellhole.

by Anonymousreply 44November 23, 2022 7:31 PM

I'm the giant gold phallus in the souq, pretending to be a thumb

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by Anonymousreply 45November 23, 2022 7:40 PM

I love the discreet boys

by Anonymousreply 46November 23, 2022 7:48 PM

R15

Becks: Qtar spokesmodel

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by Anonymousreply 47November 24, 2022 8:09 PM

I'm the Qatar football team.

I suck even by the standards of Qatar.

I'd lose a match to the Darfur Orphan. The Vassar College Croquet Club could beat my sorry ass. Kathy Griffin and Amber Heard would win over me in a fight with a pile of octopus shit (although the pile of shit might get the drop on them both immediately afterward). I couldn't lick a fucking stamp.

by Anonymousreply 48November 24, 2022 8:22 PM

[quote] I’m primitive, ridiculous people running around in gowns murdering each other over slights.

That's DL in a sentence gurl we can't throw stones!

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by Anonymousreply 49November 25, 2022 1:10 AM

Yank “soccer” team begging it to Taylor Swift. Men used to go to war

by Anonymousreply 50November 25, 2022 5:22 PM

I'm Harry Kane's big gay bougie Rolly for all the haters at FIFA!

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by Anonymousreply 51November 25, 2022 5:52 PM

I am the baby incubators Bush claim were disconnected by the bad Arabs ( with live babies in them ) in order to get Americans psyched into getting into yet another war

by Anonymousreply 52November 25, 2022 6:00 PM
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