Let's be a Homeworthy / Quintessence video

I'm the insistence from the neurotic looking homeowner that this is a really 'relaxed household'.

Nothing says relaxed like books arranged in shelves according to the colour of their spines (for visual effect).

I'm the stacks of books laid on their back completely covering the coffee table.

I'm Susanna Salk's bare shanks inside clunky boots, clomping up the front porch steps to greet her host.

I'm Bunny Williams -- the last surviving person with a stupid early 20th century debutante name like Bunny.

I thought DLers would be all over this thread.

I'm the terrified looking Golden Retriever in the background.

I'm the name Hollis Loudon Puig. I sound faintly like I should be attending parties with Didi Von Cuntington

I'm the people Susanna visits over and over, including the aforementioned Bunny Williams, as well as Nina Campbell, Johnson Hartig, TImothy Corrigan and Ted Kennedy Watson. If only someone would tell us we've run out of things to say.

I'm the elderqueen who decorates like Jayne Wrightsman on a meth bender.

I'm one of two types: either a pearl-clutching queen who seems like every Datalounge MARY! come to life; or a bottle blonde middle-aged woman who you know has at least one MAGA hat in the closet, if not a white Klan hood.

r5, i've never heard of the subject ever

I'm the fifty throw pillows that frau and hubby must remove before getting into bed every night.

I'm the random surface in a totally impractical place (like a bathroom or kitchen) containing a stack of coffee table design books lying horizontally.

I'm the Brunschwig and Fils Les Touches fabric being namedropped.

I'm the numerous patterns displayed together....with a lot of color on the walls, plus several collections....in one room. Somehow, it all works tastefully.

I am Susanna S*lk's huge gawk and 'I LOVE THAT!' response to anything the homeowner says, usually before they've even finished saying it.

"My grandparents died in the Holocaus- "

"I LOVE THAT!"

I'm the mentioned but never seen husband you know just hates everything the tour-giving wife is fawning over.

I'm the cat or dog, who shows up, like on cue....or is asleep on a bed or couch...looking cozy and adorable.

I'm the melatonin capsule broken into the pet food on the day the cameras arrive.

I'm the very comprehensively stocked bar.

I'm the Tasteful Friends Datalounge thread it prompts.

I'm the homeowner who can't afford the Hamptons or Malibu, but is determinedly trying to make Wilmington or Highland Park or Buckhead sound just as exclusive and desirable.

I'm the husband's desk chair that was thrown out and replaced with an uncomfortable Chinese Chippendale reproduction.

I'm the obligatory style: a very frauey take on Hollywood Regency.

[quote] I am Susanna S*lk's huge gawk and 'I LOVE THAT!' response to anything the homeowner says, usually before they've even finished saying it.

I'm the rolled back head and eyes that accompany that.

I’m mauve. All the baby boomer doyennes who do these videos make a point of talking about how much they hate me.

I’m the color of living rooms circa 1988 that they wouldn’t have been caught dead in and, more painfully, of dumpy party dresses foisted on them by chilly mothers who figured there was no point trying to make a purse out of a sow’s ear who can be relied on to do precisely nothing at parties but stare at the furniture and menstruate embarrassingly.

It does take a certain refinement to menstruate with panache.

Not that any of these broads can remember that.

I’m Bunny Williams’ crazily expensive homeware line.