Let's be pages from Mike Pence's book, So Help Me God!

Jesus was the best fuck I ever had. What he did to my hole? Only the devil could understand.

I don't care if Trump tried to kill me, he's still my daddy.

I was preyed upon by Priests from an early age. They privately called me Prance and would pick me up after school. Other boys noticed and taunted me with derisive 'sucking sounds'. Little did they know I was already a pass-around bottom...

It was then that I developed a disturbing lifelong pattern of being brainwashed and used by powerful men.

Mother and I keep our love life steaming hot by having sex once every two years.

Rob Reiner tweeted:

It took 2 years for brown nosing Mike Pence to acknowledge that his pathetic sycophancy was met with his boss’s desire to see him hanged. We can’t wait any longer to see that boss be Criminally Indicted.

10:23 AM · Nov 14, 2022 ·Twitter for iPhone

I used to be straight....then I met David Muir

The Jesus referred to in R1's post is pronounced "Hay-sus" - the Puerto Rican gardener who regularly ravaged said hole... Jesus never went to confession about it because confession is only for the truly repentant and he enjoyed ravaging.

Trump tried to kill me but I still service him nightly

Webster's has decided to put Pence's picture next to the definition of "groveling weasel."

Miss Lindsey isn’t paying any attention to Pence nowadays. She’s all enthralled with Herschel Walker. Daddy Trump ordered it

“Mother” brings sunshine.