The kilt-clad Scottish Army officer and equerry for the new King who is setting hearts aflutter

For those familiar with Silent Witness on Brit Box, the dude looks like Dave Caves.......and will you people complain about this continual censorship of the Daily Mail

Major Johnny Thompson

Mmmm, Mama's mussy is a wet as a trout from the River Dee...

(and smells just as fishy too!)

He's married. My chance of being with him slides from one in a billion to absolute zero. Oh, well.

Reminds me of Simon MacCorkindale.

There goes the DM, stealing story ideas from Datalounge again.

....

Big Scottish slab. Great calves. Incredibly handsome.

Major Johnny has something I'd like to taste.

^ His Haggis, right?

YUM

DL fave heterosexual Sam Heughan should play him on tv .

I first clocked him sitting right behind Megs and Harry at the Jubilee Service of Thanksgiving and then later at the after-service piss-up. It's been utter lust ever since. Now that he's equerry for King Charles, we will be seeing far more of his kilted hotness.

Unfortunately most Scottish men in kilts look like Bunter Blackford

Some wannabe queen has made a best bits compilation.

^ How delicious!

The Jubilee church service. Enlarge to full screen if you can.

He was The Queen's bodyguard. On her death, he was reassigned to be Charles' equerry.

Charles cannot stand to be upstaged by anyone. I suspect he will eventually receive another assignment.

Click on the gif for a little Major high step 😛

Sex on a stick.

I want to be that stick.

Lawd. The Daily Fail has the most stupid articles. They need their smelling salts for the most stupid things.

R22 You are obviously a superior person. Our own Hyacinth Bouquet.

Ugh, he's delicious.

I want him to give me a good Scotch Finger

Most kissable lips ever 😍

What does he wear under that kilt? Does he keep the old Scottish tradition of wearing a kilt? That's all I want to know and want to see 🙈

^ The gif @r19, gives you just a hint, but it's inconclusive as to what exactly is under there

He’s got real ADE*

*Average Dick Energy

Yeah but he's gorgeous enough that an average dick under that kilt would be one hundred percent ACCEPTABLE AND WELCOME.

He’s watching Harry very intently in R17. Looking for hidden microphones? The blonde woman next to him is giving H a death glare.

^ Yep, Johnny was the Queen's spy, but he's still hot as fuck 😍

Especially that little tuft of hair gone array 😛

Sly spy... Swoon

You’ve got to be one well-built hunk of man to carry off that uniform, and he does it very well.

[quote]Reminds me of Simon MacCorkindale.

I was thinking a less posh/twee looking James Norton.

I am crushed to learn that he is married. He is gorgeous and elegant

"I am crushed to learn that he is married. "

I don't want to steal him, I just want to borrow him... I'll return him better than I found him, promise 😜

He looks abit like Al Gore.

Ohhh.. I do like me a good Scotsman.

The uniform is perfectly silly, except when he's wearing it.

The uniform is beautiful and steeped in centuries of tradition.

@r38, "He looks abit like Al Gore. "

Yes, a bit

Any gay rumors?

The Mail has failed us .... I want to know what he looks like in his other costumes, we've seen enough of his Scottish dress-up.

@r43, He's British Military, he's Gayer than Christmas 😛

He looks ugly and stupid at r2. But he does look better with his hair loose and a more serious expression.

He’s a hunk and I want to hear him speak…love a Scottish accent!

He carries Magnum XXXL condoms, a little lube, and poppers in his sporan.

I may be alone here, but at hot as he is, the ridiculous pseudo-historical get-up is a dick-wilter.

^ Then tell him to take it off.

He’s a hunky dude in uniform, and as a kilted soldier, he’s very likely marching around with his crown jewels swinging freely beneath – what’s not to love?

Just a pity he hasn’t been caught out by a breeze yet…

He's one of those people - men - blessed with a beautifully symmetrical face. Full lips, evenly set eyes... the nose is perfect but I can't figure what it's called... Greek? Nubian?

Where are the up-kilt pics????

Liz had a collection of the up-the-kilt photos...sadly they'll be destroyed now with the rest of her extensive collection of porn, sex toys, and other items of erotica

The guy at R51 made the mistake of wearing a thong.

Wonder if Prince Edward has peeked at his sporran.

He’s probably handled his sporran. It’s a particularly nice one.

How old is the Major?

Looking at his face, absence of lines, and the fact that he's achieved the rank of Commanding Major, I'd guess early 30s. Also, he doesn't smoke, which ages the skin.

Anyone want to guess how tall our Johnno is? 185? 188?

R51 That guy was famously reprimanded by his commanding officer when that photo was published… for his socks not being even.

(The bare butt meanwhile was entirely in line with uniform regulations)

[quote]Looking at his face, absence of lines, and the fact that he's achieved the rank of Commanding Major, I'd guess early 30s. Also, he doesn't smoke, which ages the skin.

From his rank and experience he'd be close to 40, either side.

@r47, "He’s a hunk and I want to hear him speak…love a Scottish accent! "

Here you go, about the one minute mark

Out of uniform...

Here he is laughing at BoJo's inability to work an umbrella. In a suit...

From the article... "accompanied Queen Elizabeth II at Balmoral earlier this summer, prior to her death."

When else would it be, after?

He was preparing to offer his own umbrella at R64, how chivalrous.

R62 Thanx for that! While the voice-over has a WeeGee accent, our Johnno sounds like he's been hanging around English toffs too long.

Johnno looks far more delectable in his Army kilt than civvies.

That’s not a Scottish accent but we’ll still have him.

Ugh. Average Al Gore face. The calves save him.

Finally the mystery of the hot Jubilee guy behind H. Thank you DL!

Will we ever see him again now that the old girl is gone?

His voice is so masc. I'm in love.

I still want to peak under his kilt 😛

If he is Scottish he's posh Scottish... no Scots accent. The Duke of Argyll is Scottish but sounds English.

He definitely sounds English, but that’s not unusual for officers – they don’t necessarily serve with local regiments and are usually posh anyway. Honorary Scot either way, having served in a Scottish regiment.

Very handsome indeed..

"I like the cut of his jib."

R51...The jig is up. Now we know...lol.

Charles will keep him around, since he's been known to have occasional cravings for the D.

R70 He’s equerry to King Charles, so we should still see him about.

I read he wore the kilt in Canada when they were here in May and sweated his bag off. So to speak.

He's very handsome. Getting some James Norton vibes from him.

On top of it all, he has abnormally beautiful teeth for a Brit.

R51

Doris : I did not lift my skirt, it TWIRLED UP!

Suzanne : And you weren't wearing any underwear.

Doris : Well...

[QUOTE]I still want to peak under his kilt

I’m sure you would, dear. Though you might want to take a peek first.

^ Peak peek would be to see Johnny's peak 😛

All the best men are straight, this is so sad. I want a.man who has a sense of duty, who is patriotic, not some left wing queen who hates anyone who is not on their obligated woke political side

^ Join the Republican Party

No thank you, I would be a democrat we’re I in the 🇺🇸 I am a Conservative party member

Major Johnny is as hot as can be, but I also liked this guy from Holyrood Palace today (obviously you have to click on it).

Coincidentally he looks like Christopher Lambert who stared as a Scot in Highlander.

R86 lurk around the boot camps, the army job fairs, etc. if you want a man in uniform.

But know this: What you are chasing is a fantasy. What we see in our charming Scotsman is a disciplined, poised officer in a stunning traditional uniform. His proximity to the monarch(s) only ups his lure.

If he were gay, he might well be the campiest queen you've ever come across when off-duty. Glamping it up in Heaven, Royal Vauchall, etc. Lisping so hard the purses drop out of his mouth.

You're chasing a fantasy.

edit: VauXhall, of course. With an x.

Oh, thank you for advice R91.

Are you speaking from personal experience? Did he break your heart?

Fantasy is often far better and more enjoyable/exciting than reality.

Yes our Johnno has a body that one could spend days if not weeks slowly licking.

Yes, he's got lovely teeth and a wonderful smile.

Yes, he's devastating in a kilt.

And then there's reality . . .

Our Johnno has spent much of his life in regimented, service positions so that he probably doesn't have two functioning brain cells to call his own.

He is on TV just now, walking behind Charles and Camilla at Westminster Hall. He stood on the stage right in front of them both and laid out papers on the stand/pew. God, what a hunk…

His legs are too fat, besides that he seems hot enough.

r89 he has little Donald Trump sized hands. No one wants his tiny meat.

^ I do 😛

Johnny is on bbc1 just now talking about the Queen

He is on the bbc right now talking about the Queen. He looks totally different without the uniform , nothing like the gorgeous guy we have been fantasising about. He talked about his wife too

^ Give me an hour with him and he'll talk about me too

[quote]He is on the bbc right now talking about the Queen. He looks totally different without the uniform , nothing like the gorgeous guy we have been fantasising about. He talked about his wife too

He was *IN* uniform.

The beret wasn't a fashion choice hun.

He was wearing the uniform, just not the jacket. He was wearing the hat.

I mean he was not wearing his usual beautiful uniform

^ Do you wear your best Christmas sweater every day?

The uniform makes the man 🙂

Captain Johnny Hathaway White was just interviewed on the BBC.

He's the Queen's 42nd and final something or other.

Lovely skin.

Hott

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

^ Major Johnny alert!

Charles is going to banish him if he keeps getting tabloid press…

"Dammit, where my big cock and sexy body!"

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

“who is happily wed” lol

The Mail describes him as having been married for "more than 13 years" and also says they got married in 2010. Top-notch maths, lads.

Married for 13 years means the sex is non existent and it's easy to make him accept a quick blowjob from you.

When it was first reported that Our Johnno was married, I was truly hoping that his "wife" was a 190 cm brick shithouse named George. I'm utterly bereft that it's an older woman.

WE have a new James Bond...it's Major Johnny! I'm definitely SHAKEN and STIRRED.

Hope he can handle King Charles’ III meltdowns . He likely knows the drill after working for the Queen for many years. .

Sigh…he is everything lol

He needs to be mentioned the next time one of those "hot men with ugly women" threads is active.

He's BRITISH for chrissakes, none of them are "straight"

Major Johnny can sit on my face

R64, what a shame , i never saw his smile, he has teeth like an englishman, pity.

Who cares about the teeth? You won't see them sucking that juicy dick.

R16 and R24 have the same taste.

He has fat potential..

I love the reverential I just Him.

He’s got a great nose too.

Yes, I love his nose.

I'm still not seeing anything wrong with his teeth. What am I missing? They are white and straight, which is like only found in 10% of people on those islands.

Where can I find clips with his speaking voice? Help a girl out.

Dreamy!

I'm a top, but I'd submit.

Our Johnno looks far more delicious in his Army kilts than civvies. Perhaps he needs his suits tailored rather than off the peg.

Did someone say peg?

R130,when he smiles, you can see the horse teeth. not so much when he speaks. But they still white, and kind of straight, so it's still miraculous for his breed. The brits have invented the veneers for reasons best known to themselves, and he obviously doesn't need them,Also he looks hung like a horse too, so there's that.

Also, I want to say that the only time I checked the kilt legend was in the scottish store near the British Museum. The clerck let my inquirind hand run all the way up his crack, and then whispered to wait until the other customers were out, then swiftly locked the door, and let me have a full taste of the scottish sausage. I can't remember now if he let me fuck him, of if we just sucked, but since I was in a committed relationship at the time, it was probably just a sip. Since then I want to believe that every scotsman in a kilt is true to the custom, particularly so when they look like Major Johnny. The Queen was a naughty girl.

Flowers for Major Thompson...

Oh god i love him.

He's wearing a dress.

Vis-a-vis Our Johnno's current het married status, it might help to remember that Paul Burrell, the late Diana's butler/confidante/whatever, was het married for over 20 years, then divorced his wife and married the man with whom he'd been having a long-term affair.

[quote}Vis-a-vis Our Johnno's current het married status, it might help to remember that Paul Burrell, the late Diana's butler/confidante/whatever, was het married for over 20 years, then divorced his wife and married the man with whom he'd been having a long-term affair.

Paul Burrell is a homosexual? A homosexual who is married to a fellow homosexual? NO!

I just read a twitter account of someone on the QueueE2 and she said those around all hated MM and love our Major.

^ We so glad you arrived to make this delightful thread all about you and your brimming hate

^. Just repeating what I read .. I’m more of a fan of the Harkles.

There was an interview with the Queen's former equerry on ITV yesterday. Nana Kofi Twumasi-Ankrah had the job for 3 years and spoke very fondly of her.

r146 of course he spoke fondly of her, all the people that make it into these jobs or raging royalists that are desperate to be near a source of power. The smart ones play this game in government, the other ones try to get into royal circles.

Simon Case might disagree. Or Lord Geidt. Or Lord Feloowes. Or... well, you follow.

There was a TV show called Australian Princess where Paul Burrell trained some sheilas to become a princess. It was won by Kylie Booby.

There was a clip of Burrell trying to be assertive and strict with the girls but them just laughing at him.

I can't find that but here's a different clip.

Classy.

I took a screenshot of him right behind Harry and Anne when they entered the church.

He is perfect

What happens when you get an erection in a kilt?

Then again these are Scots we’re talking about so the answer is probably “hardly anything”.

Isn't the UK full of Major Johnny types?

NEW: The King held his first weekly audience with the Prime Minister @trussliz at Buckingham Palace this evening.

Am I wrong for wanting to lift up that kilt and eat his ass?

R156, you're on DL - you'd be thrown off if you didn't want to do that.

R156 only if I can be 2nd in line.

^ You guys handle the rear, I'll be up front taking care of what counts 😛

I've never seen a man who can work a plaid skirt and a pair of knee socks like this guy 🙂

Major Eye Candy.

^^^...

That probably what killed The Queen.

^ Are you kidding, that's what kept her alive that long 😉

My guess is the clean concert has checked out his goods. And given her personality she’s probably sampled it as well. Actually, she is an expert rider….he he he he

Liz Truss' awkward curtsy slouch slump is the essence of galumph.

R159, don't care for Stilton cheese dick. Have at it. I'll plow that glorious ass. 🍑

HOT.

Thanks for the link r168. Good stuff.

That is a very meaty forearm. In line with his meaty calves. YUM!

But depressingly hairless compared to the legs.

Johnny, we hardly knew ye.

Watching the infamous duo...

^ I bet he keeps a camera under his kilt 😛

If so, can we please have the live view?

I love his subtle expressions in that GIF in R173. Was he placed behind H&M to keep an eye on them lest they misbehave?

@r175, Every time he sits down he accidentally takes a picture of his butt hole 😂

Can we get a screenshot of that?

@r176, He was placed there to hear H&M's plot to overthrow the Monarchy

Shhh, top secret, don't tell anyone