Bland singer Sheryl Crow turns 60 today.

I think my Bond Theme should have opened the movie.

Time flies.

Actually, I have a funny anecdotal story about her being a huge diva at a bar in NYC, Manhattan. She and her "entourage" were trying to shove their way up to the bar. A friend of mine happened to be standing up at the bar and it caused him to spill his cocktail. He kicked her in the shin and told her off. I can't recall the name of the bar specifically, but it was an Irish bar.

“He kicked her in the shin and told her off.”

Sounds like he has got a screw lose, kicked her in the shin, wtf?

[quote]He kicked her in the shin and told her off.

Rude! He should have kicked her in the cunt.

Is she hip or a SQUARE?

Next time kick that bitch in the cuntbone, it's the only thing they understand

He is crazy @R4 which made it even funnier. It was just hilarious how people can be with celebs in NYC. I'm an Ohioan.

she's bland as hell.

Happy Birthday, my dear friend!!!

I don't know exactly why, but listening to her sing, and especially talk, irritates the hell out of me. That song her and Kid Rock did together, years ago, used to piss me off.

If it makes you happy…

Joni Mitchell was asked years ago about her and said something to the effect of, not only is her music derivative but I can tell you the sources it derives from.

She was right. Sheryl had a few decent radio hits and one very solid album (Globe Sessions) but she was, in her own way, as manufactured as Britney or Katy Perry. Not a single note, not a single sound, not a single curl of hair happened without someone from the record company guiding the way.

She really should have considered joining Fleetwood Mac. It might have been the best use for her talents (she can play and sing, obviously) and may have put new energy in the band, instead of the corpsefest it's been for decades now.

It’s my birthday today, also.

And Jen Aniston, Tina Louise, Burt Reynolds, Brandy, Taylor Lautner….and Sarah Palin.

Was she offered a spot in Fleetwood Mac?

She’s ummm an average white girl next door

Sheryl and Stevie were friends and a few times, Sheryl's been mentioned as a replacement - including a time in the early 00's when she would have replaced Christine McVie.

But for one reason or another, none of them came to pass. I think Stevie and Sheryl had a falling out years after that.

Happy Birthday, r14!!

R17 I thought the other band members said no.

Saw her in concert many years ago at Red Rocks. She sucked. She spent 20 minutes pounding on an electric keyboard, sang a shit song about a drag queen/trans and then did a bizarre, shitty acoustic version of "All I Wanna Do", which was the main song the crowd wanted to hear. The opening act (the Rembrandts) was much better.

Always and forever awful.

Sheryl is a cunt.

R19 I think that was a CYA move to save face once she passed on the idea.

Does Sheryl's pussy stink?

Her lyrics are distractingly bad. For example, A Change Would do You Good is catchy but the terrible lyrics take away from it.

r22 ah, I was just coming here to say that. . .

even though other parties have forgiven her over

I've seen no evolution in her character.

to give people a picture, she rather reminds me of Chelsea Handler... not quite as much foot in her mouth but the same airs of narcissistic entitlement and chronic cuntiness.

Chronic? I can't think of the last headline I saw relating to Sheryl Crow. She's not a rent-a-quote celeb.

I can't believe Prince wasted his time with her.

Once a backup singer for Michael Jackson, among others, she certainly paid her dues if she was a creation of the industry as claimed above.

A renter of mine is a good friend of hers and, take this with a grain of salt, says she’s absolutely lovely. She’s touring later this year with Jason Isbell, who by all accounts is a great guy. They are coming to my house for a cocktail party when they come through so I’ll report back.

It cannot be denied that she has terrible taste in men as well as duet partners.

She was on the HGTV Home Town Takeover thing, and nothing was sadder than watching a once famous superstar who filled stadiums struggle to entertain 30 fans on the streets of Bumfucke, Alabama.

[Quote]They are coming to my house for a cocktail party when they come through so I’ll report back.

Show her this thread!

I've always liked Sheryl. She writes catchy, middle-of-the-road songs....Nothing wrong with that.

She bored me to tears post 1995. She is not interesting.

Are you strong enough to be her man?

All you naysayers - A Change Would Do You Good.

R24 her ass sure does.

Im sure Joni has main character syndrome when it comes to other women musicians. She was embraced and celebrated by the jazz greats, after all.

Having read a bunch of music press and gossip over many years, my impression is that she was little more than a background singer who fucked her way to business connections and the material that made her briefly an A-lister. Basically, she was a Rita Ora before Rita Ora.

R37 Joni has said in interviews that she would be goaded by journalists who would literally ask her about every living female musician but didn't ask about her own music. She's admitted that sometimes she falls into the trap and says snarky things.

She also said that she recognizes it works in reverse - that any woman with a guitar is immediately compared to her, and some of them put HER down, what she called the "kill Mommy" syndrome.

I'd still take her any day over Ariola Grande, Caca, Beyonce, etc.

Another horsey faced sexual symbol in the tradition of SJP, Jennifer Aniston, Celine Dion…straight men sure have odd tastes.

r27 while no longer a household name, she pops up from time to time with other performers.

one should revisit how she fucked over her band... it's a more sordid tale than the typical transition from nobody to superstardom.

She a bitch!

I'm wary of any woman who dates Lance Armstrong.

I like catchy songs, so I liked her first album. My sister played it nonstop on a road trip we took, so it has good memories.

There was some video she made, where there’s a neon sign shaped like her crummy thin lips. Like that was her signature thing, like Cindy Crawford’s mole, or something.

Actually, I just went to look for a photo and can’t find one. Did I imagine that?

She had so many hits. I didn’t realize until I looked. Wow.

Excellent plastic surgery

R38 The Acoustic Rita

I have always loathed her. Watch her interview with Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens Live....it's all very "before I became a star"...and stuff like that. She is quite full of herself. and always is around men with..... horrifying issues: MJ, LA, KR.

When we went our separate ways, she kept my left ball.

"Well I went to bed in Memphis and ah woke up in Ho-lay-wood." Happy Birthday, Sheryl!!

She got her shit together, adopted two boys, and is living happily ever after with her family. I see absolutely nothing wrong with that.

moooo

She soaked up so much sun, that she is now Cheryl Crow's Feet.

Prince recorded a cover of one of her songs. Could she really be a hack?

I don't know her.

Say what you want about her singing, she was writing songs for big acts like Celine Dion before she even released her first album.

Sheryl is a cunt

When she toured with Michael Jackson she was sexually harassed by his manager Frank Dileo

She is aging well

Somebody tweeted this the other day (it's from MJ's BAD tour), and I couldn't stop laughing at it.

ewwww, poor sheryl

Her singing voice is not strong at all - you can really tell when you hear her sing live. But I still enjoy her first hit All I Wanna Do. As far as pop songs go, it's pretty great.

The Way You Make Me Feel

I liked her 90’s stuff but everything post-2000 has been terrible. Absolutely hated that Soak Up The Sun song.

My Favorite Mistake is a good song.

If she’s sixty now, her success must have come much later in life then I expected.

I'm not a fan but she did an outstanding job on the old Fifth Dimension song One Less Bell To Answer.

The Globe Sessions is a good album with some really good songs, not just My Favorite Mistake.

Sheryl also dated deplorable Eric Clapton; subject of My Favorite Mistake. In addition to dating Lance Armstrong and dueting with deplorable Kid Rock. She needs to douche with Listerine.

I hate the melody and lyrics of I Wanna Soak Up the Sun, though. So fucking basic and boring, makes me angry almost.

r49 wasn't she with Eric Clapton too? Terrible taste in men.

R60, the face and noise you make when he puts it in the wrong hole.

I love There Goes the Neighborhood and Anything But Down, from The Globe Sessions album. I love Home, from her second album.

Still blonde then?

The clips upthread of her touring with Michael Jackson are seriously embarrassing. LOL.

Wow.

Didn’t Lance Armstrong drop her when she got cancer, despite losing his balls to cancer himself?

[quote]Sheryl also dated deplorable Eric Clapton; subject of My Favorite Mistake. In addition to dating Lance Armstrong and dueting with deplorable Kid Rock. She needs to douche with Listerine.

And it was rumored she also dated KR.

With all the deplorable men she’s dated or worked with, it makes me side-eye her. People usually get involved with people similar to themselves.

Michael Jackson at R63 was lip synched - so obvious! Sheryl looked a little awkward, I guess.

Nothing tops Siedah Garrett's duet with him on "I Just Can't Stop Loving You," but I do like Sheryl's version too.

I always thought she was white-adjacent

I thought "Everyday is a Winding Road" was her worst song.

she didn't have a singing voice which made listening to her exhausting.

Her singing voice has always sounded like a cat being tortured.

She sounds and looks great here

[quote] When she toured with Michael Jackson she was sexually harassed by his manager Frank Dileo

She also got to witness Jackson abusing that chimp he used to carry around with him all the time.

Sorry to be a buzz killer but it’s true.

Her singing is very pinched and nasal sounding. There's a very thin quality to her vocal production. She sounds terrible paint by numbers singing One Less Bell To Answer. She's not good at sustaining notes or lyrically connecting phrases = in other words she's a pretty lousy and limited singer.

If it Makes You Happy and I Shall Be Believe still sound good because the more staccato phrases and the production values lend her voice more power and polish than she actually has. Technically she can sing in that she has a good range and intonation, but she's far from a good singer. Bland. Blond. Lucky.

I like some of her songs. I thought her house was hideous.

I don't.

The iconic "Soak Up The Sun" by legendary star Sheryl Crow is on both the April 2002 and May 2002 Gap In-Store Playlists!

I don't think "Soak Up the Sun" is iconic. It was the last gasp of her commercial success - a very mild chart comeback.

You prefer songs about Falstaff Beer?

"A Change Would Do You Good" by the critically-praised Sheryl Crow is on the August 1997 Gap In-Store Playlist!

I didn't mind Soak Up The Sun, mostly because Liz Phair was on it, but it was literally the last song of hers I liked. The rest of that album sucked and so has everything else she's done since.

I don't mean to be a misogynist but it does make you wonder if someone else was writing her music or creating her sounds. Sarah McLachlan hit the same wall. She had one masterpiece (Fumbling Toward Ecstacy), one solid-ish album (Surfacing) and then literally everything else she's done since has been bland office radio shit. How?

Leaving Las Vegas sounds like The Joker from the Steve Miller band.

All I want to do sounds like Stuck In The Middle With You by Steelers wheel.

How reductive.

Leaving Las Vegas

The Joker

I ... wanna soak up the sun

Wanna tell everyone ...

To lighten up.

She's part black like Mariah Carey

Michael Jackson chose her as a backup singer - why? Even though I think MJ was mostly gay, I think he thought she was attractive. Especially if he featured her (non-singing), on stage, as "The Girl" in "The Way You Make Me Feel."

Usually, background singers have really good vocal chops. Not Sheryl.

I hate her music she should have been a 90’s one hit wonder never to be heard from again.

Also she was the worst thing about Cougar Town, who thought she could act??

She said that she was sexually harassed during the Michael Jackson ( not by MJ but buy one of his people). She was so depressed afterward that she stayed in bed for a year.

R99 Then she crawled out of bed and sat on Eric Clapton’s racist dick…

Basic

Can’t stand her.

She IS super bland. That’s actually a great description of her.

Why do I get the idea there is ONE poster who keeps posting all this "she's bland" crap? Putin and his bots would be so proud of you.

She performed at the 2008 DNC, so she can't be all that bad.

"Light In Your Eyes" by multiple Grammy Award winner Sheryl Crow is on the May 2005 Gap In-Store Playlist!

Enough with the gap playlists shit. Any goodwill that you had accumulated expired when it was revealed that you are a MAGAT racist in your anon posts!

Sheryl said, during the period when free downloads were potentially costing artists some profit, that she couldn’t make her art unless she was going to get paid for it.

Interesting - the same 2 "Sheryl is bland" posters have posted over 50 times in this thread.

Sheryl Crow is bland though.

She's been used for a lot of soundtracks it seems, if they were filled with angst, like the White Oleander movie.

Even her "angsty" songs are bland.

Sheryl is one of those artists that I want to like but there's just something lacking in her personality and her music.

She's also not very good live. I saw her perform in concert and the best thing I can say is it was free. We left to catch our bus during the last song but it wasn't a feeling of "OH, I wish I could stay until the end". We were relieved.

Still, she had a strong run of hits and her Very Best compilation is solid.

r90 brings up a good point. I think the case with Sarah MacLachlan was she got divorced and I think she just wasn't inspired. You'd think she would have been inspired to write a strong divorce album but she churned out more frau-ish coffee house music. It all sounds the same. She also went the Christmas route. I think she has released about two or three Christmas albums in the last 20 years.

Sheryl is a really great song writer. Her best songs are not the ones that got released as singles. The album that Soak Up The Sun ended with this song, which is a perfect rejection of that single.

R82

New documentary about her is on showtime. She comes off as quite down to earth and honest. Talks about her struggles with depression. I’ve never been a huge fan of her music but she has been around forever. If you’re a fan, check it out.

I’ve never understood the intense hatred for her here. She’s not one of my all-time favorites but she has a lot of songs that I really like, including this one.

Love that song R117. Also love the acoustic version of “strong enough.”

R32 = Middle ages white frauen

Bland AF

Just an FYI middle aged white hetero ladies, this is a gay site... We really don't care about your bad basic taste in music, let alone reminiscing about it...

[quote]Sarah McLachlan hit the same wall. She had one masterpiece (Fumbling Toward Ecstacy), one solid-ish album (Surfacing) and then literally everything else she's done since has been bland office radio shit. How?

Sarah McLachlan got married and had kids and lost all of her angst and became a total frau. Most of these female singers can’t write a good song anymore once they start having kids.

Matt Bomer is a fan.

She's much frauier than Celine Dion, who seems at least a litte self-aware of her campiness. Or even Faith Hill who comes off as a little elitist.

I enjoy her music. I think she’s talented as well. Her voice like someone set up thread is not that great. She seems like a good person. I did get to see her live in Santa Barbara maybe in 2001. We were pretty far from the stage. It was a beautiful setting but man it was boring! It was the only concert I ever fell asleep at.

Sherly is trans

Her documentary was really good.

Bland singer Sheryl Crow turns 60 today. I saw that as BLIND singer Sheryl Crow turns 60 today.

I stand by the greatness of If It Makes You Happy.

I just love that song. It's super catchy. Great hook. And the lyrics are really interesting.

Fun fact: My straight best friend was caught crying to her song Strong Enough in high school after a breakup. He was always a total sap (and I love him for that). I tease him to this day!

[quote] Most of these female singers can’t write a good song anymore once they start having kids.

R122 Same thing with comedians once they find happiness -- they're no longer funny.

Her documentary was so, so bland. She’s written a few memorable hits, but as a person? She’s an ambulatory vanilla wafer. It was everything I could do to stay awake until the end. She reminded me of your typical Range Rover driving, green juice drinking Brentwood mom, down to the expensive highlights - who just so happens to be a well known singer. Jennifer Aniston cosplaying as a rock star.

The problem with her is that she’s always been a black hole charisma vacuum. Some great songs, but she’s utterly lacking in star quality or presence. It’s like watching your friend’s mom tear it up at karaoke.

[quote]It cannot be denied that she has terrible taste in men as well as duet partners.

I beg your pardon!

-Jakob Dylan, who did NOT have an affair with this horseface who looks a lot like my horseface wife

[quote]She’s an ambulatory vanilla wafer.

I love you, r131!

I feel there was some music industry black magic in which Sheryl Crowe absorbed Liz Phair’s indie soul and something happened and now there’s two Sheryl Crowes.

If It Makes You Happy is one of the best songs of the 90s, would be in my top ten of the era for sure.. it doesn’t mean she deserves a documentary. She’s dull as dishwater. Janet had a similarly fawning and insipid documentary recently. They seem to function less as a genuine window into someone’s life, and more as a fluff piece to prop up said artist’s ego. Nice for the subject, incredibly tedious for everyone else.

Love her, everything she’s done is great

I enjoyed her three 90s records immensely, especially Sheryl Crow and The Globe Sessions. I don’t think calling her third album The Globe Sessions did her any favors, as it sounds like a live album or a collection of unreleased/rare material. A bizarre choice.

I did not connect with her slicker pop album (the one that housed Soak Up the Sun), and basically forgot about her after that. She’s released quite a few albums since then, are any of them reminiscent of her early stuff or worth checking out? For some reason it seems like none of the Lilith Fair gals were able to keep up momentum or write music on par with the 90s classics.

R138 I agree, with Sheryl, Alanis, Liz et al it’s a case of diminishing returns. The recent Alanis albums are almost unlistenable.

Sheryl released a country-pop album around 2013 (think: Faith Hill or Shania) that’s actually pretty good. I don’t know how well it sold, but it’s polished and catchy. I listen to it on road trips. It’s not a patch on Sheryl Crow or Globe Sessions though.

I love that album r139. “Easy” sounds like a country radio staple and the ballads like “Homecoming Queen” remind me of Miranda Lambert.

The First Cut is the Deepest is a classic!

I don’t.

I agree R1. It's kinda shocking when you hear KDs song, which is really very good, and see they went with Sheryl's song which is one of the worst Bond themes out there.

The only Sheryl song I like is "All I Wanna Do".

If she makes you happy, she can't be that bad.

She was on The Howard Stern Show last month. She said she had a fling with someone in the industry and some tour they were also on together a few years after they initially met and fucked and she wrote that my favorite mistake stupid song about him but never names him. She did say it’s NOT Eric Clapton. Thoughts on who she fucked? Ew she did fuck Kid Rock so she clearly doesn’t have the best taste , two major anti vaxxers (Rock and Clapton)

She has just released a remake of Post Malone’s “Circles.” Is this when pop culture finally completely disappears up its own ass?

… of course I meant a “cover,” not a “remake.” I couldn’t come up with the right word just then, because I, like Sheryl Crow, am old.

She was ok. She had some catchy hits mainly in the 1990s. I did always find her rather bland. She surprisingly won nine Grammy awards! I remember at one Grammy Awards, she won and got up on the stage and went on and on about how she had grown as an artist. I remember thinking that she had some catchy tunes, but characterizing herself as some great artist was going too far.

....that fat professional victim greasy haired pig and her ugly children LB garey.

she's music's version of Chelsea Handler

She doesn’t seem very likable in this article.