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Trouble In Twinkistan, Part One

Kyle has been going steady with his boyfriend Caden for 2 whole months now, but lately he's been feeling pressured by Caden to go all the way. Kyle loves Caden, but thinks they should abstain until they're married, which would make it more special. Still, Kyle is worried that if they wait, Caden might be attracted to Tayson, who hangs out with JoJo and a lot of other boys at school with a bad reputation.

What should Kyle do in this situation?

by Anonymousreply 38December 7, 2024 5:58 PM

Kyle should join the water polo team and seek out a sophisticated gentleman to mentor him. An attentive neighbor would be ideal.

by Anonymousreply 1October 3, 2021 2:50 AM

Kyle and Caden and Tayson and Jojo are clearly characters in a Harlequin romance written by a fat, ugly woman. In the real world they all would have fucked each other by now and have moved on to the Navy boys down at the pier.

AND all have herpes and raging cases of scabies.

by Anonymousreply 2October 3, 2021 2:56 AM

r1 What if Kyle's neighbor is a man of questionable character?

by Anonymousreply 3October 3, 2021 2:59 AM

Horoscopes explained.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 4October 3, 2021 4:31 AM

I think Kyle should report to Caden's mom and dad. Modern parents are always so understanding.

by Anonymousreply 5October 12, 2021 7:18 PM

Better yet, spread rumors about Jojo and Tayson.

by Anonymousreply 6October 12, 2021 7:53 PM

I think they should blame their parents for those names.

by Anonymousreply 7October 12, 2021 7:59 PM

r6 Jojo and Tayson already have a bad reputation at school for cutting classes...not to mention that incident during volleyball last year!

by Anonymousreply 8October 21, 2021 8:23 PM

What in god’s name is this thread about?

by Anonymousreply 9October 21, 2021 8:42 PM

Like, is this one of those SAT questions where you have two trains coming from opposite directions?

by Anonymousreply 10October 21, 2021 8:44 PM

Is this a reference to something?

by Anonymousreply 11October 21, 2021 8:49 PM

I think Kyle should save his butthole with the intention of waiting for marriage. He will probably lose his seal before then as there is always another guy down the road. Besides If Caden is willing to pleasure Tayson, then he is of questionable taste. Tayson has been seen at the free clinic many times. And that skank Madysen said Caden gave him/her lice, ticks, and crabs.

by Anonymousreply 12October 21, 2021 8:58 PM

[quote] Like, is this one of those SAT questions where you have two trains coming from opposite directions?

No, two TRANS.

by Anonymousreply 13October 21, 2021 9:03 PM

These names are too white trash to bear consideration.

by Anonymousreply 14October 21, 2021 9:04 PM

r12 Kyle has too much self-respect to give himself away to Caden while they're just going steady.

And since Tayson and Jojo pulled that stunt in Gym class -- waiting for Coach Jackson to throw the ball to them to bend over, pull down their gym shorts and spread their cheeks! -- my daughter Bunyqah will NOT be inviting them to her parties anymore!

by Anonymousreply 15October 21, 2021 9:18 PM

There is no Twinkistan.

by Anonymousreply 16October 21, 2021 9:20 PM

Muriel promised there would be no math.

by Anonymousreply 17October 21, 2021 9:23 PM

No, you have it all wrong. The PTA moms nowadays are all fat, trashy waddling trashy types named “Jodi.”

They and three of their friends are “PTA OFFICERS” (jobs no one else will do) so they can justify not getting jobs to their dumb, redneck husbands.

by Anonymousreply 18October 21, 2021 9:24 PM

Twinkistan? Just what the world doesn't need--another fucking Muslim country.

by Anonymousreply 19October 22, 2021 12:03 AM

Jewish, Christian, Muslim really what is the difference. They kill each other and innocent people over nothing.

by Anonymousreply 20October 22, 2021 4:08 AM

Caden spent all of yesterday in a mood because Kyle couldn't go to the Drive-In with him the night before.

But Kyle really DID have to wash his hair!

by Anonymousreply 21October 22, 2021 1:54 PM

Luckily, Kyle and Caden had the good sense to see Coach Jackson before going on their 6 month anniversary date. He reminded them that not all of their friends were having sex and that it really would be better if they waited. Personal values are just as attractive in a boy as looks, after all.

by Anonymousreply 22October 30, 2021 5:21 PM

[quote]What in god’s name is this thread about?

Thank you for asking, so I won't have to. Did you get an answer yet?

by Anonymousreply 23October 30, 2021 5:30 PM

Me thinks the lady dost protest too much. Once Caden finally gets it in Kyle, he is shocked to find that it wasn't nearly as tight as Kyle claimed and was able to get it in with little effort and a dab of spit.

Caden - Kyle is a whore darlin'.

by Anonymousreply 24October 30, 2021 5:30 PM

pedo thread

by Anonymousreply 25October 30, 2021 5:33 PM

Sometimes holding hands is more fulfilling than sex.

by Anonymousreply 26October 30, 2021 5:36 PM

r24 That was from an accident Kyle had during 5th grade recess. Caden already knows about it!

by Anonymousreply 27November 5, 2021 8:14 PM

Despite what your friends tell you, waiting until after marriage decreases, rather than increases, a boy's temptation toward sins of the flesh.

by Anonymousreply 28November 5, 2021 8:18 PM

Caden has been taken under Coach Jackson's wing. He's learning that Abstinence can be fun and hygienic!

by Anonymousreply 29December 27, 2021 4:51 PM

Oh, I don't mind a little hugging and kissing every now and then ... but [italic]that[/italic]?

Anyway, class, here are your dolls for this semester's parenting simulation. Skyler, Jaysen, and Kregg, ABSOLUTELY NO SEQUINS OR POP-DIVA NAMES ALLOWED.

by Anonymousreply 30December 29, 2021 3:48 AM

In my day if you didn't go all the way in two hours it was OVAH!

by Anonymousreply 31December 29, 2021 3:51 AM

Ignore anything here until Kyle, Caden and the other boys grow some pubic hair.

by Anonymousreply 32December 29, 2021 4:00 AM

r32 Coach Jackson does a monthly check to keep track of puberty development.

by Anonymousreply 33December 29, 2021 4:21 PM

Everybody is talking about Bunyquah Henderson. When Bunyquah and that skank Madysen Cope started dating, the kids all thought the most she'd be getting out of it was a social disease. But a pregnancy??

Well, at least that settles the question of whether or not Bunyquah is Trans!

by Anonymousreply 34December 30, 2021 4:44 PM

Coach Jackson, after a retreat with 3 young Bible students, has hit on the perfect solution: He's proposed to Kyle and Caden that they undergo a Purity Commitment ceremony! Both boys will pledge their undying love for one another and vow to remain pure by being abstinent until God deems them ready to join as one. The union will last as long as their purity does.

by Anonymousreply 35January 12, 2022 9:45 PM

bump

by Anonymousreply 36May 29, 2022 10:23 PM

I think Kyle should talk to Pete, the burly UPS driver that delivers packages to his house. Pete sees Kyle looking pretty glum and says, What’s up bud? Kyle pours his heart out to Pete, and Pete, being the sensitive older, father figure type listens and gives some good advice. Then Pete rails Kyle in the back of a sweltering UPS truck on one of the hottest days of the summer. Now Kyle realizes that going all the way is just a fun thing guys like to do with one another and it doesn’t mean that his love for Caden isn’t real. He can’t wait to go all the way with Caden now. That is, until the monkey pox start appearing.

by Anonymousreply 37May 29, 2022 10:36 PM

But it's the eve of the Twinkistan Eagle Scout Jamboree!

Will Kyle and Caden repair their relationship in time?

by Anonymousreply 38December 7, 2024 5:58 PM
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