Physical signs that can tell a person is a douchebag

Greasy hair brushed backward with a little ducky flip in the back.

They wear a man bun.

Greasiness in general and gold “bling” as the kids call it

For me, it is if the person eyes look dull all the time. Dull eyes is because the person's pupils dialates. If a person eyes dialate all the time, it may indicate psychopathy.

They always keep a bag of vinegar and water nearby.

Choice of clothing makes it obvious.

[quote] “For me, it is if the person eyes look dull all the time. Dull eyes is because the person's pupils dialates. If a person eyes dialate all the time, it may indicate psychopathy.”

Oh, dear. You poor thing.

R7 How foolish of me

If they are leaking douche.

Mirror sunglasses or wearing sunglasses on the back of head. A cellphone holster that makes them look like they're carrying a gun

Backwards baseball cap is unquestionably the sign of a douchebag, and possible rapist.

MAGA hat

It’s mostly in the privileged look on the face

A black t-shirt with the outline of a wolf filled with the american flag.

Tribal bicep tattoo

[...]

He carries around his kids by their ankles.

[quote] It’s mostly in the privileged look on the face

R13, on Lochte, however, it’s not a privileged look but rather a vacant stare of stupidity.

If they insist on virtue signaling every chance they get, like R12.

They always have a frowning expression on their face. Like they just cant wait for someone to piss them off.

Listens to Joe Rogan.

Excessive tats.

Blond baldies.

That made them mad at everything.

Men who wear large diamond earrings in both earlobes.

If they lick their lips all the time, in a "seductive" way, if they wave their hands around when talking as if they were rapping, if they wear Monster energy drink hat or a t-shirt.

If they add on a muffler on their car that makes a ridiculous amount of noise. Who do they think that's impressing? Women?

Big ass spoiler on back too makes them a double douche.

Your name is Ian but you pronounce it Eye-on.

Small penis compensation for with a large motor vehicle.

MAGA cap

Shiny suit

Wears shower slides in public

Cologne can be detected at long distances

They play loud music from a radio or phone in public.

Odious obesity.*puke*

Speak Russian.

.Speak English with a Russian accent.

Speaker phone conversations in public

Shorts in the wintertime

Use of hand gestures to make a point in conversation (so often, you expect it from them)

Purposely under-dressing to try and look like a "badass" or "edgy"

They give girls titty twisters in public and laugh about it.

r21 is Joe Rogan. (not that r21 is Joe Rogan but a sign a person is a douche bag is that they are Joe Rogan) :D

Wears the mask under their nose.

Is NOT an athlete but wears matching top and bottom tracksuit.

Duh. It's that rubber tube hanging out of their pantaloons.

wtf r34/ stop microdosing.

R35 So 99% of the population

Tan arms with white hands - golfer

Underbite combined with pronounced adam’s apple.

Prune ass with pronounced haunches narrowing down to a little butt.

Deviated septum snort

R25 with regards to licking lips constantly, that's also a possible side effect from taking Thorazine. I used to get creeped out by this old lady cashier that worked at a local CVS because she would do this all the time when she was ringing me up. I thought she was getting fresh with me. I happened to mention this to my boss at the time, and he pointed that out to me - we both got a laugh over it.

Skinny, look blue collar, pot head but gainfully employed, bisexual, very large penis, engages willingly in big dick worship role play.

Father is President of the United States.

Wear a toupee

Asian tattoo

Incessantly chewing gum.

polyester

I agree with R4.

Other signs include that vacant look all the time; gets overjoyed by new gadgets/cars/clothes, but couldn't be bothered to greet the people around them.

R41 It's a different type of lip licking. Like LL cool j. Douchebag lip licking.

R13 I don't know him but from his grin I can tell he is a horrible person.

I'm not familiar with this term.

Back tattoo

Skinny jeans at 40+

Can women be douchebags?

I'm not entirely sold that's a woman, R53. But 100% Marge is a douchebag.

Talks too much—mostly bragging

[quote][R35] So 99% of the population

Maybe where you live. Where I live, it's probably 3 out of 10.

Overly tweezed eyebrows, any weird haircut that draws attention, any "style" that looks like they spend hours in front of the mirror, Jersey Shore type, tight clothes, bike shorts on almost anyone except a 10.

And lots of jewelry.

Vanilla Ice was (and still is) smoking hot . I wear lots of jewelry and Im far from a douche bag.

R58 Says you

Drives car with modified muffler.

R56 What type of a job do you do? I'm assuming it's not a hard physical labor, but a office job or some shit like that. If I worked office job I would also have a mask covering my face the whole day. Try doing a heavy physical work for 8 hours every day in the heat with a mask over your nose

I'm from the Midwest, there are plenty of indicators:

"Punisher" imagery, esp truck decals and shirts. Any images about: guns, Confederate flag, shares lots of "I'm an asshole!" memes, thinks being an "asshole" is a personality. "Truck nuts". All-black SUV/Hummer (aka military cosplay), talks super loud, calls themselves a "hustler" or talks about "the game" a lot which could mean either a sportsball game or "the game of life". Is balls-deep in the latest Alpha/hustle/lifestyle "thing".

Is r58 Vanilla Ice?

That's what I get from the reference.

He wears his "Forward with Hillary" tee shirt outside the house.

R63 Lice Lice Baby

Well, there is a shampoo for that.

Wears cock ring at the gym.

Dear r58, We need to talk.

I didnt say Vanilla Ice wasnt a trump loving douche bag R68 ,I just said I thought he was and still is sexy. His politics wont stop me from sucking that dick till his head caved in. I'll hate myself for it afterwards,okay ?

A person is a douchebag is they are:

Rude

Loud

Talk too much

Brag

Do a lot of drugs

Get drunk a lot

Lie

Steal

Sponge off their parents

Abuse animals, children, the elderly

Are prone to use violence

Have kids they can't take care of

Men with ugly gnarly toes... in flip-flops.

[quote]For me, it is if the person eyes look dull all the time. Dull eyes is because the person's pupils dialates. If a person eyes dialate all the time, it may indicate psychopathy.

This is SO true!!

Bat symbol or batman related tattoo.

Everything R25 said.

[quote]If they add on a muffler on their car that makes a ridiculous amount of noise. Who do they think that's impressing? Women? Big ass spoiler on back too makes them a double douche.

There is an idiot on my street like this. I can’t help but to wonder if guys who do this have a small dick and are trying to compensate.

[quote]Physical signs that can tell a person is a douchebag

If he's R58

He's carrying a lacrosse stick.

R76 wins.

Pink shorts

Boat shoes

Pinkie ring

Rapist with connections in the courts

Tense jaw. Always looks slightly pissed off.

Last name is Trump.

r62 You gave the best overall objective definition. In the early 2000's it was the Ed Hardy type people, but 20 years of war propaganda has morphed it into some weird militaristic imagery mixed with rap/football symbolism. Think white racist who speaks ebonics. Super confused politically (racist Asians, Republican Mexicans or homosexuals etc). Sprinkle in some faux religiosity, and yes - you nailed it - scammy MLM type of stuff. Crossfit/Vaping/Shitcoins/etc.

Vaping, tattoos, blacked out cars, crocs, tight knit pants, etc.

Spits in public. On purpose. That one really weirds me out. They all do it.

I forgot about the spitting, R81.

R58, word to your mother: Abortion.

r70 That's just bad person stuff. Douchebags are a Jungian Archetype. Most of us know one when we see one if we aren't one. A common theme is they try to emulate whatever is going on in pop culture that is awful. They will get a tattoo of anything but Superman or an actual corporate logo.

They are violent and thuggish - yet infantilized and love Superhero movies. They want to be Post Malone but they work at Jiffy Lube. Lots of weed culture. Not just smoking it and smelling like it, but living the "lifestyle" which means more logos and tattoos of pot leaves or something. Some Aryan symbolism if racist. Iron Cross tattoo. Punisher symbolism. Pride in military service and/or police impersonators - don't look up Jeremy Dewitte RABBIT HOLE ALERT.

r84 I meant they WILL get a Superman or Nike logo tattoo. I can add one more: overcompensating masculinity in general.

They wear any CrossFit apparel.

Usually white short, muscular man with a bald penis head with bulging anger veins all over it. Jeff Bezos, but manages a vape/urban streetwear store.

90 percent of dudes who shave their heads before the age of 40 are absolutely about to snap.

Also - Gun ownership, again - like the weed thing - not just owning guns, but living the gun lifestyle. Politics, religion, hobby, all gun related and gun related gear. Trucks, guns, weed, vape, steroids, country rap, smells like air freshener. Cell phone attachment syndrome of a teenage girl.

Huge beard, bald head. Flag waving. Walks with arms swinging wide to peacock as wide as possible. Owns "property" but lives in a rental apartment. Has millions in a cryptocurrency you have never heard of.

r58, You may want to rethink the jewelry.

r88 Depends on the caftan, sometimes he's gonna have to accessorize.

R49 - it seems like all black guys constantly lick their lips. I guess because they're big and need lubricating. They also constantly suck them in, I assume for the same reason.

R70 Doing a lot of drugs is not a douchebag trait. Some douchebags may do a lot of drugs but there is a ton of non douchebag folks, men and women that do drugs.

R87 "90 percent of dudes who shave their heads before the age of 40 are absolutely about to snap." Or maybe they started losing hair and don't want to look like they are 60 years old

Being Italian.

R88 I had to suck a lot of dicks to get those jewels ,honey ! I'll be dammed if I wont wear them considering it killed my knees. Oy the arthritis ! Kidding aside,all were gifts from dear friends and lovers and every time I wear a piece I think of that person. So thank you for the fashion advice,but Im 60 and dont give a shit about trends or what people think of my tacky old ass wearing too much jewelry.

Rolls the cuffs up on their denim shorts

Bright white shoes

"Doing a lot of drugs is not a douchebag trait. "

I've never met a regular or heavy drug user who WASN'T a douchebag. Druggies are insufferable to be around. They act like idiots.

Orange skin

You're wearing douchey sunglasses in your Facebook profile pic.

And how many women are attracted to these guys who are clearly douchebags - and then they act surprised when said douchebag is violent towards them.

Domestic violence rates would go down if female stayed clear of these men. Let them be single and perhaps change their attitudes.

R97 You are confusing an addictive behavior with douchebagary. Many cool people get not so cool if they become drug addicts or alcoholics. That what addiction does to a person. Has nothing to do with doing drugs. Actually, many douchebags are actually very anti-drugs.

Leaking something that smells summery and like the eve of a huge fuck.

Here's Why Women Like Jerks, According To Reddit

Why do we care "what women like?"

THIS! fucker, here! Second from bottom right - YEAH, HIM! Haha

r87 Both can be true, but I'm not talking normal men who just don't want to look bald. It's the guys who go full Vin Diesel, and look militaristic/police/future villain from a sci-fi movie. They are douchebags. Not everyone can be a douchebag no matter how awful they are.

They start as jocks, or preppy rich kids, or wannabes as youths. Then usually graduate to a fraternity in college. If no college - then look out - they are extra douchey. If they have a LITTLE money, add some douche points, Real estate sales or broker? Add some points Tinted windows on car or even better truck? Add points. Read literature of any kind that isn't Dan Brown-esque - subtract Listen to bad rap music, bad cologne, any motorized water sport? JET SKI? Holy shit add points. Bumper sticker of punisher or MLM scheme? If married, is wife trying to sell you something vague and weight loss related?

I just realized Chris Watts was a douchebag before he was a family killer.

It's very very hard for a gay man to be a douchebag. The societal inputs aren't there. A large part of douchebaggery is compensatory hyper-masculinity mixed with an almost complete lack of originality or style. The same dude popping his Lacoste collar in 1985, was wearing his Ed Hardy and Von Dutch in 2004, and is wearing his punisher hoodie in 2019. (Unless you were doing Paninaro in 1984, mixed with some Ellesse and Benneton).

I was cackling at the beginning of this thread and agree with most, but...

What do normal people wear if they don't wear shower slides? I don't like thong flip flops (I don't mind the look but have never been able to tolerate the feel) so I force my kids to wear shower slides. My son is NOT a douche but I have him wearing Nike slides. My husband refers to the socks with shower slides as a prisoner look (he worked as a prison guard before we met). He does sport this look around the house though. My son's buddy also goes with this look. I thought it was trashy but yesterday walking around Princeton, saw an Asian dude (17-20ish) with socks and slides. I am racist in that I have a lot of respect for Asian dudes. They seem to really try to keep it together. I have switched to really trashy foam 2 two 3 inch platform 90's slides myself, but I am trying to cushion my old hips and elongate my fat body, and they do kind of work (except when I fell down at the flea market).

Husband cut hair really short before everyone was doing that and I admired that he was embracing going bald. We always get treated well and reverse profiled (not searched, barely glancing into my purse) at Disney and stuff. Anywhere where there is security. My husband looks like a cop and we are white as hell with light eyes. Cop types never bother us. It's not right, but it's okay. Husband is also half Italian, but doesn't look it. My mother hates Italians. Am I what people here refer to as a "stream of consciencenes" (can't spell) poster?

Also why is Dan Brown douchy? I know because it's popular and he ripped off some other guy's idea, but whatever. Trying to get son to read all the time even though husband and I don't. Finally gave him DaVinci Code and he liked it. My mother looks down on it because she says it is not theologically correct. He liked it and I get it even though I am too lazy to read it. Gave him some other bestseller, one of those guys. Gave him Catcher in the Rye, he read it. He hasn't been finishing anything else so I gave him Me Talk Pretty One Day. I think he is reading that. So what should a fifteen year old A++ reader be encouraged to read?

They have a big cross tattoo on their bicep and/or a “Only God can judge me” tattoo.

R105, you didn't even have to point him out

[quote]My son is NOT a douche but I have him wearing Nike slides. My husband refers to the socks with shower slides as a prisoner look (he worked as a prison guard before we met). He does sport this look around the house though. My son's buddy also goes with this look. I thought it was trashy but yesterday walking around Princeton, saw an Asian dude (17-20ish) with socks and slides.

Slides?

Yup....

Anyone with this facial hair looks like a sociopath.

Neckbeards, in general, bleat "I'm a douche bag!" Duck Dynasty beards bellow it.

No, r108, you just seem like a frau who doesn't know when to shut up.

Douche Bro - Handsome edition

Has a personal FaceBook account.

r108 Copy random asian people you see on the street - even if it's Princeton....which is still NEW JERSEY? Wear whatever you want, but not making an effort at all isn't very endearing.

Like sagging pants, they are all fake jailhouse style for white suburban teenagers. Tell your kid to get a nice suit, in both wool and twill, that FITS, and change them out every two years.

Nike anything is gross. You aren't athletes. You aren't sponsored by Nike.

Being common? Better be very very hot. If not, be smart, and interesting, or and have some STYLE. Make an effort. Otherwise, DBAG.

r109 Basics. Albert Camus. He's a boy? David Foster Wallace. ANYTHING, but airport fiction.