Minimally Tacky at Walt Disney World

There's one that's like retro mid century resort. Go there.

Sorry OP, I thought it was at Disney. It's at Universal, but still in Orlando.

You want the Grand Floridian, or the Beach/Yacht Club Resorts.

My partner adores Disney World so I obligingly go along. The hotels there come at various price ranges. They are also located close to the different parks--so decide where you want to go based on price and the park you intend to go to most frequently.

You will barely spend any time in the hotel so don't go nuts hoping for every luxury. They are all good enough.

As for Universal, if you stay at a Universal hotel, you get to ride the boat in each morning to the parks and you get the pass to skip the lines.

Rather would take a fist. 🤜 🤜 🌺

Avoid the budget "All Star" resorts, particularly the "All Star Sports" resort: it's near the ESPN complex, used by many high schools for tournaments, and they're full of high schoolers. It's depressing AF.

R4, Universal sounds so much better, and that hotel at R2 (thanks, R2) looks decent. I'm going to look at staying there and going to their parks instead. Disney World looks exhausting, but Universal less so.

Boardwalk Inn or Grand Floridian. Both nice places if you want to stay on-site.

Orlando's International Drive also has huge world class hotels for Disney goers and people in town for conventions. Do some research.

R4, which parks do you go to at the resort? Which is most tolerable to you?

Epcot is shockingly boring and bereft of anything other than a sad aquarium. It's such a waste of money. I'm shocked that it had high attendance.

This sounds really sad, for some who has taste.

Oh dear, R11.

Minimally tacky, OP?

Oh, my.

[quote] Disney World looks exhausting,

Wait’ll ya try it with COVID.

Don’t worry, OP, DeSantis is handling everything by doing nothing to mitigate. You’ll be fine.

Wilderness Lodge and Coronado Springs Resort are decent places.

Waldorf-Astoria Hotel, Orlando

Importantly after a day in the Magic Kingdom when you need a break, there are no random Disney characters lurking behind the marble columns here.

R7 are you the OP? The kids want to go to Disney World and you want to pull a swicheroo with Universal instead?

R17, I'm going to ask them; maybe there are things there that they'll like more. They have Harry Potter at Universal. I checked.

Can't you do BOTH, OP?

R19, yes, of course. Universal hotels are cheaper and look ok, and you get that line-cutting pass. But we can still go a Disney park or two.

The Waldorf Astoria looks nice. Outside my ideal price range, but I could splurge this once.

Universal is far more entertaining than Disney for anyone over age 8 and under 65.

OP check out the Rosen Centre and Gaylord Palms too. Southwest Orlando is practically a city of fancy resorts and hotels. But like someone said keep in mind that the kids will not want to spend a lot of time in a hotel.

Do we really hate OP that much we’re encouraging him to go to Florida of all places?

I found Universal completely boring, except for the Harry Potter World, which was pretty amazing.

Universal just lacks the imagination Disney Parks have. So many of Universal's rides are virtual.

Go to Disney over Universal any day.

I didn't know anything about the Florida resort so I watched this. They said "Magic Kingdom" - I had no idea what they meant. That's the park that looks like Disneyland.

Four Seasons, anyone?

The Landscaping Company?

If you go in the off season, which may be difficult with school-aged kids, both Universal parks can be done in a day. The on-site hotels there look a bit seedy. I would stay at WDW.

How old are the rugrats, OP?

Don't stay at the one where the young boy got pulled into the water by an alligator last year while he dad tried to save him. They found his body stuffed under a log.

Stay the fuck home. No one gives a shit about your trash nieces and nephews.

How stupid are you, Guncle?

How long are you going OP? I went to Universal a few years ago as an adult (alone) to see the Harry Potter park and it was awesome. The rest of the park was fine, but it isn't Disney World. If you are going for 4-5 days, I would just stay at Disney World and spend one day at Universal. As R21 said, Disney is more geared to kids. Universal had a surprising amount of bars, which I found cool, but you can't drag kids in there.

10 and 12 next year, R29. We have a week, but haven't decided how long it'll actually be. I like that Cabana one at Universal, because it's new (I like newer hotels). Also nice is one that NBA players stayed at recently - Gran Destino, at Disney. I'm looking at that, too.

Grand Floridian. By far the best of Disney’s properties.

In order to ride the Harry Potter train, you must have tickets to both Universal Parks--pure money grab

The Value Resorts are all tacky and ugly

The Mid-Range and Deluxe resorts are all good. Stay at Contemporary, Swan or Dolphin if you’re not a big fan of the excessive and meticulous theming of Disney Resorts.

Gran Destino and the new Riviera Resort are both very nice Moderate resorts—midway in price between the Values and Deluxes. Neither is overly Disney-themed.

^ Oops—the Riviera is a Deluxe Villa (time-share) resort.

Try the Contemporary. Less kitsch, and it's walking distance from Magic Kingdom.

The Theme Park Suite at the Contemporary gives you THIS view of the nightly fireworks.

I stayed at the pop century which is pictured in OP’s post. Stayed there back in 2013 and I really enjoyed it. I got a discount as two of my friends were cast members. They said that because Disney have such high standards, even their budget friendly accommodation is top notch. I was 23 and staying by myself so didn’t see the point in forking out heaps of money. I’d happily stay there again.

[quote] Don't stay at the one where the young boy got pulled into the water by an alligator last year while he dad tried to save him.

Why would you tell him not to stay there? OP didn’t say whether he liked his nieces or nephews or not.

Cabana Bay at Universal looks very DL. Reminds me of the DL trailer someone made.

[quote] Don't stay at the one where the young boy got pulled into the water by an alligator

Where is this one located?

I mean precisely.

It was at the Grand Floridian. They put a nice memorial there.

Iger is such a stud.

I'm interested in going to China after Universal Beijing opens. It's a huge resort that's going to start with a single park, but will add another later.

Four Seasons, WDW Swan, Grand Floridian, Riviera Resort, Waldorf are all top-notch hotels. Yacht & Beach Club, Wilderness Lodge and Animal Kingdom Lodge are very nice as well. At AKL you could even get a savannah view room. Most of these also have Club Level Service lounges.

The VIP experience makes it less exhausting. The Points Guy is gay and he brought his niece and nephews to WDW.

Do they still have the original hotels, the Contemporary and the Polynesian? I always wanted to stay at the Contemporary when I was a kid because it looked so modern and fancy when we would ride through it in the monorail. But my cheap ass parents stuck us in a La Quinta offsite.

R50, yup, they're still around. The Polynesian added bungalows and the main hotel is being renovated now. This cute possible gayling explains.

Which one has the best access to DataloungeLand?

[quote]Importantly after a day in the Magic Kingdom when you need a break, there are no random Disney characters lurking behind the marble columns here.

TRIGGERED.

If you want to cut down on travel time, stay at the Contemporary, the Polynesian, or the Grand Floridian, which are literally next door to the park. The problem with some of the other resorts, like Animal Kingdom Lodge, is that they are ways from the major parks and you'll eat up time with driving or taking a bus. These three hotels are on the monorail which will take you right to the parks in no time.

Gran Destino.

I grew up in FL and pretty much lived at WDW as a kid. On Spring Break in my Freshman Year of college, I took a friend who had never been to WDW and we flew from NYC and stayed at one of their hotels. This was back in 1989, so they didn't have all the theme ones they do now. It was a WDW hotel, but not on the grounds. However they had shuttles that would take you to the park and bring you back. I honestly can't remember the name of the place, but it was fancy-ish. The shuttles were lousy, especially going back to the hotel. I remember we waited forever for them. And I also remember that we arranged for a shuttle back to the airport through the hotel. They told us to wait in the lobby (which was humongous, so we stayed right by the front door) and when the driver arrived, he would come inside and call for us. We waited for three hours, checked in with the desk several times, and found out that the guy had been and gone without coming inside. We had to take a rollicking cab ride to the airport which consisted of us screaming at the poor driver to go faster, and we just made our plane.

The Disney Vacation Club/Deluxe Villa resorts can be a great value if you rent a unit directly from a time-share owner vs. booking through Disney (see link). The biggest pluses are extra bedrooms and kitchenettes or full kitchens. If you want to stay on the monorail line as R54 recommends, the Contemporary, Grand Floridian, and Polynesian all have dedicated DVC units.

For Disney hotels, Grand Floridian is the best, for both quality and convenience. Some of the newer high-end hotels might be nicer in the rooms but they can't match the convenience of the monorail.

If you want to stay at Universal instead, I stayed at the Universal Loews Portofino Bay years ago and it was very nice and convenient for the Islands of Adventure park, plus staying there gave you line-skipping perks. (That may or may not still be in effect)

Non-theme park hotels, go with the Four Seasons.

Stayed at several resorts, both cheap and high-end. Re: the budget All-Sports/Music/etc. type resorts, they are fantastic! Like someone said above, even poor-people Disney is nice. I stayed at the All-Star Music resort and the bed was super comfy, the shower had great pressure, and the staff was super attentive. And it was a quarter of the price of the Grand Flo. The pools are super cute too, the one I was at had a big piano-shaped pool that was fun to lounge around between the parks. There are no alternative dining options at the lower-priced resorts though, just fyi. The one great thing about the Grand Flo was that you could get a wood-fired pizza at 1 am. Also, it is definitely a more budget-conscious crowd at those resorts. So you do get groups of teens and 20 somethings who will be loud/annoying. The Beach/Yacht Club was my least favorite, way too kitschy and crowded, and so many bratty kids. The boat access is nice, but it's slow. It took us 45 min to get to MK if I recall correctly (but it's right outside Epcot which is awesome). Grand Flo is gorgeous, but I'd only stay there again if I had a day or two to actually use the amenities and enjoy the hotel. Also, the club levels are very worth it. Food is great and free-booze (and it's good stuff too) in the evenings. And it does save you money and time in the parks by not having to eat full meals. Polynesian is beautiful too, but much more cramped than Grand Flo. Saw the new over-the-water bungalows and they're so cool. Also, the general look of the Poly is dated. The great thing about the three Bay Lake premium hotels is the quick access to the MK.

Several years ago, I ran into this book while browsing Amazon. It was 99 cents when I saw it so I grabbed it on Kindle. It is ridiculously over-detailed about every aspect of hotels and deals at both parks in the US. The writing is so mundane and OCD that I found it fascinating. And it's written by two different people who have a sort of "84 Charing Cross Road" relationship. Each has different families and they never meet.

At the end of the book, it's clear they are beginning to have romantic feelings for one another. They actually published a 2nd volume, so of course I needed to find out how these two anal homewreckers got together and I bought it. Not a WORD about their relationship, other than they were now together (and they later get married at one of the parks) but the woman will go on for five pages about the quality of the Uncrustables the resort provides at the snack buffet.

It really is quite the hoot. And each volume is something like 600 pages!

Going slightly off-topic OP to let you know that no matter how reluctant you are to take them to such a place you're a good person for doing so and you'll have a great time.

Years ago, when my twin niece and nephew were very young, they asked me and my spouse to take them on a trip. (We travel quite a bit.). I said, sure, when you graduate college, thinking it was way in the future. Well about 16 years later they graduate and began reminding me of the promise about a year ahead of that time. I asked them what they wanted to do -- Paris? London? Hawaii? No, they wanted to go on a cruise. Well that to me was a seaborne Disney, but we started working on the plans and we found a ship and an itinerary that would satisfy all of us. It was the best vacation I'd had in a long time, and it was truly enjoyable to spend so much time with them. All of which is to say, Go and have a good time! This will be a great experience for all of you and they'll always remember it.

This new hotel at the Swan and Dolphin will be completed next year and they give Marriott points.

OP are you hot? You're gonna need something to do after those little shits conk out at 10pm.

OP will be conked our too after keeping up with the kids all day. Good bars at the hotels though.

R51 I love Brayden!

Get a one-bedroom villa at Disney`s Riviera Resort, OP

Brayden is so unapologetically nerdy. It’s cute.

I would love to hook up with hot mid-30s dad bodded straight guys who need a little release after dealing with their bitch wife and bratty kids all day. Meet me in the jacuzzi, dad.

The “contemporary” is right next to the main Park. If that’s too expensive then the New Orleans one isn’t bad either. The cheap ones are horrendous.

The monorails are garbage.

WDW is rotten with fresh-faced gaylings working their way through college or, if slightly older, working their way up the Disney ladder. OP will have no problem getting laid once the kids are asleep. They have LOTS of bars there. Just make sure to get a 2-bedroom suite so you can hustle your tricks in and out before the kids get up and want their Mickey waffles.

^^^^^^Get a room with connecting doors. You can lock at your convenience and then do the help at night. I stayed at the Yacht Club and it was nice. Like a Marriott and the service is beyond anything. They really treat the kids like royalty. A couple of things to keep in mind: Pools, it's all about the pools. Kids dont give a fuck about rooms, but they like the fancy pools and after a day in Orlando heat, they will need a pool. Staying on Disney property means it easier to do a character breakfast or dinner on site. The kids really love that stuff. Locate a sports bar nearby, go into it late when the kids are asleep and score some Disney Dad dick!

I used to work for Disney. The most convenient resorts are those on the monorail system: Polynesian, Contemporary, and Grand Floridian. The Wilderness Lodge is also fairly close to monorail stations. Avoid the budget resorts at all costs.

When you stay at Disney resorts, you get perks others don't, like: *Extra Magic Hours before the parks officially open *Free Magic Bands *You get to schedule your Fast Passes 60 days in advance instead of 30 days like guests staying at non-Disney resorts (Fast Passes are a reservation to get on a ride at a given time with no lines) *As a Disney resort guest, you can buy 3 additional Fast Passes (for a total of 6) for an additional $50 *No hidden fees (parking, internet) *Free transportation to and from the airport

Grand Floridian, with Kyle Pallo and JoJo Crichton.

They're cute, but that video sounded more like a progress report from their last trip. I don't feel like anything was explained about how a Disney vacation works.

r40 There are no nightly fireworks during the pandemic.

Avoid the value resorts at wdw. If money is no object then stay at a Delux. I think the Polynesian is the best. Grand Floridian is nice but a little stuffy. Contemporary doesn’t have much to offer besides location. Boardwalk and Wilderness Lodge are also great. The moderate resorts are nice but further away from the parks. The key to WDW is planning ahead. That means dinner reservations and booking fast passes well ahead of your trip. Do your homework. A good site is easywdw.com

The Cabana Bay Beach hotel is great.

Parliament House. But I'd hurry.

The very last time I went to WDW (about 16 yrs ago), we stayed at a hotel offsite that was budget but actually had a lot of very cool stuff attached to it. It had a shuttle bus to and from the park. In order to take advantage of the magic hour in the morning, we twice made reservations for the character breakfast buffet. It was expensive, but the food was good, we didn't have to wait smashed up against the rope with the poors and we got to ride some great stuff that first hour a couple times in a row with no waiting.

R74 I think Kyle Pallo is hot.

WDW employed 77,000 people. Jesus.

[quote] WDW employed 77,000 people. Jesus.

No, they didn’t employ him.

[quote] The Cabana Bay Beach hotel is great.

Any hot cabana boys?

My friend has used Mousesavers and swears by it to get rooms at top hotels.

For me, I don't see any use for paying $400 a night for a room I will rarely actually be in. That goes for all of my vacations.

There's currently no Fastpass due to the pandemic—for the time being you have to reserve a general Disney Park Pass in addition to your admission tickets for social-distancing purposes.

This looks nice. It's coming soon.

Years ago we stayed at the one themed on New Orleans. It was nice enough. I wanted to stay in the Polynesian Village but I was 15 and nobody was listening to me.

Looking back it was all pretty tacky but we had fun.

I felt so bad for the kids at the “budget resorts” when I was there. They are abysmally depressing.

Everyone that works there that’s not in a costume is a dick. Our receptionist had a list of 20 complaints none of which were passed along to anyone.

The water park people are the worst.

Ive stayed at some of the budget resorts. They were all totally fine. The nice compromise are the mid-level hotels for just a bit more than the budget hotels. Not as much white trash there.

[quote]Years ago we stayed at the one themed on New Orleans.

It's okay to refer to it by name (Disney's Port Orleans - French Quarter) instead of a description.

[quote]I think Kyle Pallo is hot.

I've met him several times. He's nice in person.

Just out from Brayden.

[quote]Any hot cabana boys?

Dixie Wentworth?

I love that Abigail Disney just says whatever’s on her mind.

I read on a Disney fanatic's blog years ago that the Polynesian resort was assembled essentially as shipping containers, wherein the individual hotel rooms slipped into the building grid pre-assembled. Granted, we're talking 70s construction in Florida, so who knows how much of that is true.

The Contemporary resort had been run down for years before Disney finally sunk some $$$ into it after horrendous reviews. Again, an older resort that had continuous business because of the location and monorail.

I like Port Orleans because it reminds me of the motels I stayed in growing up. So very few nice, motel-style resorts still exist...most have gone to pot, been torn down, or *should be* torn down instead of being a Motel 6 or Days Inn.

Kids LOVE hotels, are you kidding? The ice machines, vending machines, pool, breakfast buffet and gift shop... the complimentary coffee and ice water dispenser that has little slices of fruit... shower caps and the tiny fridge, the bathrobes...

I fucking LOVED hotels and motels when I was a kid. But I'm a huge fag, too.

[quote]Dixie Wentworth?

WETSworth.

That place at R55 looks like it belongs in Vegas, not Florida.

OP—try the Bay Lake Towers. On the monorail (via a sky bridge connected to the Contemporary) and has all suites. Nice pool too.

LMAO at the kooky OCD Disney guide couple! Wtf?

Bay Lake Towers is a Disney time share hotel. Though you can rent a time share.

It was the Contemporary that was constructed like shipping crates. They thought it would be cheaper to construct, but it wasn't; it was the first and only time they used that method to construct a resort.

A studio with a standard view at Bay Lake Tower is $860 per night. Yes, you get a kitchenette, but are you really going to use it? A family that can afford $860 for a room is likely to have enough money to buy Starbucks and breakfast in a park.

A idea I never tried: some people are using Lyft to park hop rather than wait for Disney transportation. Not a bad idea...

[quote]A idea I never tried: some people are using Lyft to park hop rather than wait for Disney transportation. Not a bad idea...

Lyft has teamed with Disney on a WDW-branded ride-share service called—wait for it—Minnie Vans.

r103 Cute! Didn't know that.

I’ve stayed at the Port Orleans, it’s not bad at all. Not five star but I think the expensive properties at Disney are a ripoff. So are the expensive dining venues at Epcot. The food is not fine dining for what they charge.

I’d go if there were a new park. I’ve already been to the four.

[quote] Avoid the budget "All Star" resorts, particularly the "All Star Sports" resort: it's near the ESPN complex, used by many high schools for tournaments, and they're full of high schoolers. It's depressing AF.

Depressing? Sounds like heaven.