Martha Stewart Slams Chelsea Handler

She's never given a fuck. Even back in her 80s Letterman segments you could tell she will shade the fuck out of anyone.

So funny my reaction to Martha Stewart was how nice it must be, to be able to take a carefree selfie poolside after serving jail time for the insider trading. Just remember a black man died for much lesser offense and that is white privilege!

I love Martha

Martha is obsessive about details and socially awkward. (And awkward with comedy). I say... aspies.

I love Martha, and think anyone who goes after her is a fool. She has no fucks left.

Yes, there were a few slaps in this, but also a lot of compliments.

It's not like Chelsea is a fragile flower.

What does she mean gather you political liberals?

They both look the same age—scary alien plastic purgatory with muppet mouths. Neither sound clever, either, just drunk and weird.

#TeamMartha

Martha looks much better than Chelsea.

Martha was coming to my city to speak at a luncheon at a museum and the catering company I work for considered bidding for the job. I prayed we didn't do it because I just knew no matter what we served it wouldn't be good enough.

"Woah!"

"Yes, there were a few slaps in this...."

FFS, you people are way to sensitive. Stewart started with a borderline catty tone in her off way of being humorous, then went straight in to laugh at herself (something she does, if rarely) and then pile on compliments to Handler.

What's Stewart famous for? Beautiful things and being just a little too obsessed with them. She's laughing at herself, especially as you can't discern any details in Handler's pool

If she had wanted to be mean, it would have been clear, even to you.

If I could be Martha Stewart, I would.

Can I have your penis r12?

Did Martha make a typo with that last sentence? Gather you liberal politics?

She was the best part of Comedy Central's Justin Bieber Roast.

#TeamChelsea

Fuck that crooked Nazi cunt Martha!

No r13, but I'll sell it to you.

Used, in great condition, 6.5" cut.

I did some work for MS' former publicist. MS is a lonely bitch, but damn her life looks good from a distance.

Chelsea looks like she has AIDS while Martha looks flawless.

R16 Chelsea Handler's grandfather was an actual nazi.

I don't really get it.

Martha looks amazing for 78.

Team Handler

Fuck Martha Stewart

Are we sure MS wasn't hacked? That was way harsh.

I've been under Stewart's hypnotic spell since "Living" back in the 90s.

My TV emitted her sound and image. I absorbed them. Since then, I've been caught in her tractor beam. It's her voice that pulls me in and immobilizes me.

And I infer, and am flattered by, her nonchalant attitude that my life would encompass the time and desire to make a blueberry bandana tart.

Totally Team Martha.

If Martha was a man, she never would have gone to prison.

Men hate powerful women, they make their dicks wilt.

Race has nothing to do with it.

Are we really going to overlook Handler reposting Louis Farrakhan or starting a fight with Joan Rivers, calling her grandma? Didn’t she get a show by fucking the president of E!?

Beat you, Della. I've been a Martha fan since I bought Entertaining with a gift card, Christmas, 1982. I went home and made cranberry nut tarts all week long, and started decorating platters with flowers in the spring.

Why is that R2? It should hardly be a surprise. That is your reaction to everything. You probably think milk being white is yet another sign of white privilege.

Martha is pissed she’s not Jewish

There was a lot of that in Jew Nersey, r30.

Handler seems a little out of it posing naked with books and face masks covering her privates. Does she have anywhere near the audience she had when her E program was popular and her books sold at their peak? She’s a progressive thinker but looks like she’s struggling to find any audience for her recent projects. Her Netflix show was like a difficult delivery, a baby with clamp marks on its head, and it tanked in a few short seasons. It was meant to be like 60 Minutes but “faster, quicker, cooler”, but it wasn’t, though. She’s appealing in her politics (to people like me, at least), but her brand doesn’t have much stamina and looks like it’s aged out of the zeitgeist. She reminds me of Jon Stewart in a way. Popular, edgy for a time, then eclipsed in a more crowded progressive media environment. That must be rough to deal with and figure out. I’d hate to be “clever ten years ago”. I’d disappear and bank my cash, keep my clothes on, maybe back off some of the weed and vodka and whatever, at least during the week. Stewart is awful but really loaded and in full command of everything around her. She’s more like nuclear waste, around forever. “Don’t try this at home”.

Love Martha.

[quote]Martha is pissed she’s not Jewish

What not?

She's pissed that she's not a Mormon drunk like Chelsea?

Chelsea Handler is cool, two generations younger than Martha Stewart and much less criminal.

As a sociopathic, corporate predator and supporter of the Republican Party, Martha Stewart is a traitor to the United States and needs to go back to prison.

CASE CLOSED CUNTS

Chelsea is Jewish from a Jewish mother, raised Jewish and pokes fun of her Mormon dad all the time.

Chelsea's father is Jewish (you bitches can't tell that "Handler" is a Jewish name?) Her mother was German.

Chelsea is a no-talent drunk.

Chelsea Handler apologizes for posting Louis Farrakhan clip: ‘I was wrong’

Joan Rivers on rival Chelsea Handler: 'She's not a genius' and she slept her way to the top

Chelsea really aged out of her whole act, just like Amy Schumer after her. They're both passe at this point.

When your whole act is based on sex and being a drunk slut, you don't have a long shelf life.

Has Martha Stewart ever apologized for anything?

Especially for demanding tax cuts when the country is $30 trillion in debt and she has plenty? Especially when Trump is selling U.S. law to foreign dictators and condoning their slayings of American soldiers and ignoring a pandemic killing hundreds of thousands of Americans?

But Chelsea's the deplorable one? Sleeping with an executive to get ahead is the crime?

THEN CANCEL MARTHA AND THE PORN STAR FIRST LADY PROCURED BY EPSTEIN THAT MARTHA STEWART SUPPORTS!

Martha "slams" Chelsea? People seem to completely have lost the capacity for reading comprehension. She was clearly joking and in no way slaming her.

It's "subtle shade," R43. So subtle that virtually no one else picks up on it.

Handler’s ok. Her politics are palatable but she’s not so entertaining or engaging when building content around them. I like her, but I can see her tending to a macadamia farm at some point, like Roseanne, who was really funny and transgressive for a while, and then really not. Maybe she should steal a page from Bill Maher’s playbook, learn from his mistakes and ideally find a way to stay relevant, but with her clothing on. It’s fair to wish that she was funnier and smarter before championing her. I think one of her Netflix projects ripped off Wanda Sykes, or maybe honored Sykes by trying the same concept.

R45 here. Mea culpa, Handler’s program was different than Wanda Sykes’. Only the titles sounded alike, but the concepts were not. Sheepishly taking back my comments.

I love that Martha criticized Gwyneth Paltrow when she started Goop and people hadn't really started talking shit about it yet.

I saw her at the 92nd Street Y. It was an evening with Andy Cohen interviewing her. He asked her if she watches the Housewives shows and she literally laughed in his face and said, "Of course not!"

Good. Chelsea Handler is a cunt, she deserves the Ellen treatment.

I love Martha. She has all the wit and charisma Chelsea pretends to have, but unlike Chelsea she's very rarely a sanctimonious bitch about it. Martha can make fun of herself, Chelsea can only ever poke fun at her self in a way that comes off as fishing for compliments or sympathy.

Team Martha

don't see the point of pitting them against each other. They obviously have mutual admiration.

Martha 'bout to cut Windy Williams, and who can blame her? It starts out good enough, but of course Williams navigates it South by putting Martha on the spot about her "love life."

I like them both.

Chelsea is a homophobic cunt who's gone off the deep end with her friends like Deb Messing.

As one good turn deserves another, here is Handler interviewing Claire Foy - funny shit.

At the time Handler got her talk show, she was "dating" a bigwig in the boss's office.

She seems cliquish, calling Angelina Jolie names because she (Chelsea) is/was friends with Jennifer Aniston. If I were Jennifer, I would have said STFU. Never let them see you sweat.

Martha probably didn't like that Chelsea spelled out Martha's age: 78. I'm usually good at reading between the lines, but I can't see any digs in Martha's response.

R48

Constance (Maggie Smith): How horrid. And who turns out to have done it?

Morris Weissman: Oh, I couldn't tell you that. It would spoil it for you.

Constance: Oh, but none of us will see it.

What is "Gosford Park?"

[quote]R9 Martha looks much better than Chelsea.

That’s because she’s a former model.

I bow to you r28 and send you a pretend "Martha's Peach Buckle".

Stewart is a staunch Democrat. Also, she's been friends with the Clintons for years.

Oh do fuck off, tiresome, R2.

r26 Oh, shut the fuck up, dykescum. Who the hell is threatened by MARTHA STEWART??? She's just a glorified 1950s housewife, the platonic idea of Frau.

Oh, and yeah, there's also the fact that women receive PRIVILEGED treatment in the court system, including short penalties (or no penalties) for crimes that men get sent in jail for and for longer.

Kindly fuck the fuck off, R2. You are tiresome as fuck.

R11 you're the only one with a brain on this thread.

Martha surely thinks Chelsea Handler is crude and common.

The whole thing was tongue-in-cheek.

Martha has a great sense of humor, especially about herself — she can laugh about her own incoherent drunk Instagram commenting.

She wasn't trying to be cunty to Chelsea, she just played into her own image by posting some facetious design critiques followed by a lot of compliments.