The Janet tours

Velvet Rope:

All For You:

Rock Witchu:

OMG how many fucking threads do we need on hasbeens??? First Vadge, now this??!

Get into 2020 people!

The one where she made out with MJ onstage. That was epic.

Nobody cares about Janet Jackson now.

Her tour of fast food joints in LA, during her 2004-2005 fat period.

OP, you forgot to include the State Fair tour.

This thread needs more cock.

Flop Witchu: High School Auditorium Tour (2021)

Even playing her hits and behaving herself she still can't outsell Vadge.

#ByeByeJanet

JABBA got red tagged!!!

BWAH HAHAHA

HAHAHAHA!!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHA!!!!!!

How old are you, OP? About 14? And a girl?

Please, R14. Nobody aged fourteen knows who Janet Jackson is.

Tittygate ended her place at the top of the pops. She never recovered.

No, her career was already sliding by then.

The incident was irrelevant.

Lol, omg was Janbot FINALLY red tagged? Hilarious!!

Janbot was REDTAGGED!!!!!!!!!

It has multiple IP addresses though.

What was the one where she was almost booed out of Australia?

That one.

They are all the same.

Janet lip-synching to a medley of songs, doing the same choreography from her last tour. We will have that cute section where it looks like a cheap bouncy castle and I will sing Escapade and act all goofy and smile even though I am a grown ass woman.

Then I will sing a ballad and shed crocodile tears to look like I care about my crazy Janbots.

Then I will have a sexy section where I will bring up some random guy on stage and be so edgy and sexy and flirt with him. But instead of being sexy it will be incredibly tedious and go on forever.

Then I will sport some cool sunglasses and lip-synch to Rhythm Nation and do the same tired choreography I did from 1989.

If you miss this tour, my dear fans, I promise you the next one will be exactly the same!

I've seen all of her tours live except Rhythm Nation (I was 14 at the time and wasn't thinking about going to see concerts) and Unbreakable, which I had tickets for but she became pregnant so I was able to redeem that ticket for State of the World. All of her tours were masterful displays of showmanship and skill, and are a testament to why she is one of if not THE blueprint for the way that today's hot pop stars present their live shows. The Emmy winning Velvet Rope Tour was probably where she peaked on an artistic level. That thing was a juggernaut, and was so big that it won the night in ratings when it aired on HBO, and when it stopped in Hawaii at the Aloha Stadium, they had to add extended seating just to meet demand. LOVED State of the World, and I'm also partial to the RWU Tour, as she performed songs from her first two albums for the first time on tour, and that catwalk stage was EVERYTHING.

The Colonel cares about Janet.

He's got the only thriving business in LA.

[quote]. That thing was a juggernaut, and was so big that it won the night in ratings when it aired on HBO, and when it stopped in Hawaii at the Aloha Stadium, they had to add extended seating just to meet demand.

God, how times have changed.

They also added extra bleachers for the County Fair 🍗"Chicken & Biscuits" Tour, but only a few stragglers showed up.

But on the plus side, the KFC's were packed that summer.

That's right. Janet's basically been giving the same performance for decades now. She's really gotten her money's worth from those Paula Abdul dance moves.

FFd the racist at R25.

Who is the nutball @ r27 with the massive hard on for Janet Johnson?

Anyone got an extra ticket to the " 🐔 Chicken & Biscuits Tour? "

[quote] Flop Witchu

Here's the complete "Rock Witchu" tour.

Jabba, any other tours available?

She's never really been a good live performer.

She's never been a good performer under any circumstances.

When's the most recent video of her singing live?

Her claim to fame is being Michael Jackson's sister.

He's dead and gone.

And so is whatever "career" she once had.

Her claim to fame is someday being a Trivial Pursuit answer to the question, 'Who's breast fell out at the 2004 Superbowl?'

I'm looking forward to her next tour in 2021, when she opens for the Whitney Houston Hologram.

I'd rather see Janet lip sync her hits than watch Madonna sing every new song from her shitty album at 2 in the morning after surrendering my phone.

Is Janet still touring this year? I thought all State Fairs were cancelled. Where is she gonna perform?

[quote]I'd rather see Janet lip sync her hits than watch Madonna sing every new song from her shitty album at 2 in the morning after surrendering my phone.

LOL, Nasty, and I love it!

Is MANdonna planning on resuming her Madame FLOP Auditorium Tour, sponsored by Depends?

Janet's Number Ones:

The RHYTHM NATION WORLD TOUR still holds the record for being the biggest debut world tour of any artist. It sold out the Tokyo Dome in under 7 minutes and was the only tour by a female to land in the top 10 US concert box office grosses for 1990...

ALL FOR YOU Live from Hawaii was AMAZING. She was in tip-top shape and proved why she's the blueprint for today's pop stars...

MTV hosted a special about her janet. World Tour back in 1993. It was hosted by John Norris and was all over MTV at the time.

The Funnel Cake Fried Chicken Donut Tour.

I heard the first five rows get doused with lard.

Kind of like at ICP concerts where they throw Faygo.

That IF choreography is soooooo fucking tired.

^You MUST be white.

^You MUST have zero taste.

Surprising she never toured until 1990. A "Control" tour would have been huge.

They hadn't perfected lip synching in 1986 yet.

The Damita Jo Tour

The same military moves are one thing, but she even wears the same outfits!

At Glastonbury when it was the height of summer she was still wearing that same black RN number.

Janet, you need an image consultant (one who isn't Janbot).

Omg!

Wasn't she covered head to toe in those big frumpy black outfits because she was married to that Muslim guy?

Yup, yup.

[quote] Wasn't she covered head to toe in those big frumpy black outfits because she was married to that Muslim guy?

More like because she yo-yoing up again.

I bet the bitch's farts would gag a maggot.

[quote] Wasn't she covered head to toe in those big frumpy black outfits because she was married to that Muslim guy?

Video:

[quote] The RHYTHM NATION WORLD TOUR still holds the record for being the biggest debut world tour of any artist. It sold out the Tokyo Dome in under 7 minutes and was the only tour by a female to land in the top 10 US concert box office grosses for 1990...

And yet it's not anywhere on the list of 1000 highest grossing tours ever. Bitch, take a seat before your other account gets greyed out, too.

Janet slays

hagdonna DECAYS

Man, these Janbot threads are such a trove of unintentional humor. I have been bursting out laughing reading this to the point of tears. Thank you, Janbot, for your delusions. They make great entertainment for the rest of us here on the DL.

JabbaJabbaJabbaJabbaJabbaJabbaJabba please. Jabba please.

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So where is that baby that she tossed away to her sister?

Where is the other baby that she had a few years ago when she was bigger than a tent? Does she still have him, or did she give him away, too?

[italic] Happy Mother's Day, Mommy Dearest !

I see Janbot's back with a new IP address. Bitch must have gone to a different public library.

[quote]Thank you, Janbot, for your delusions.

R20, that was a Fox News story that was proven false.

The full concert is below and shows an audience full of delighted fans.

Where's the video of her tour of State Fairs?

The bankruptcy judge confiscated the footage as property of the bankruptcy estate in an attempt to get some monies back into it, R68.

@R67 .......... She's HUUUGE ! ! !

r70, Janet is not huge, grow up!

Bitch be fat.

Hella fat.

You’re fat.

Masterful retort, JABBAR73.

*rolls eyes*

When I think of Janbot, I think of this....

However, he's probably someone who looks like this instead....

She should do a tour with just her and a microphone singing with a live band, and yes she can have backup singers too!

^This would be the song to open that tour...

It was inevitable. She finally became the white woman she always wanted to be.

^You should really refrain from posting pics of your mother.