Malibu Barbie In Quarantine--Any Questions?

Taffy says hi, too!

She's a little shy. Hee.

Hey Gurl, You coming up to our house for brunch later right ????

Good ! Shes been responsible for enough pain already !

Do Ken and Allen ever get it on?

Bob and Carlos you bitches did'nt invite me !!!

Oh, you gays make me LOL! So silly and fun.

Midge just posted this selfie to Instagram. She tries. Even in quarantine, she really tries.

No offense, but it's because you're black.

Yolo

Malibu Barbie was based on Sharon Tate. Thanks, OP for making me sadder than I already was.

I can't have been the only one confused and saddened when he first took Ken's pants off.

I have been to Bob and Carlos' wonderful beachfront mid-century modern home several times over the years !!! They only have the "right" people come to their gatherings. Somehow I feel that anyone with the first name of "La-Barbie" who resides in Long Beach would not be prioritized on the guest list......

Skipper has never been fine, talk about doll interrupted!

Here we all are, just a month ago, doing some serious sun worship! Ken, Moi, PJ, Christie, and little Skipper.

Happier times. Sigh.

Yes, there you "all are." And who took the photo, bitch?

You know I have problems with sun exposure.

You dumb bitch. I'm here in my 1-bedroom apartment in Reseda, with my two boys out of school, running around, driving me crazy; my loser boyfriend playing video games all day; and Pablo next door blaring his circus banda music and making the whole place shake. We've run out of toilet paper, I'm running low on insulin pen needles, and with both of us not working, we're running out of money for food. And you think [italic]I[/italic]wanna hear how [italic]you're[/italic] doing in your Malibu beach house?? STFU, ya tone deaf bitch!

Later tonight at Bob and Carlos' house .......

Damn, R17!

Fucking social distancing.

R17, either you have quite the collection of these plastic icons, or access to some kick ass doll porn. Thank you so much for making me smile, in a strange way. I still don't know why I'm here, but I'll go with it.

Daisy, honey?

Jeggings are not your friend.

Just saying.

Barbie, after 14 days of lockdown

why thank think you R19 and may the goddess bless you and keep you safe !!! I have one more item to share for everyone's enjoyment.

That ain’t the real Barbie! That fucking cunt opened her mouth about my burgeoning meth business one too many times! Bitch is now sleeping with the fishes.

She’s in the pirate castle in my goldfish bowl. Ssshhhhh!

[quote]Malibu Barbie In Quarantine--Any Questions?

Do you live near Aaron Rodgers? If so, do you have any gossip?

We're all gonna DIE!!!

Well, well, well. When push comes to shove, you camp out in Malibu. All that medical training was just you being an attention whore. #CancelBarbie

I was sorry to hear that your theatre was shuttered. I was so looking forward to your production of Into the Woods!

Guys: it's me, Skipper. Please help.

The Big B has been drinking boxed wine pretty much non-stop for 12 days and vaping. She just finished the gin to wash down Ambien "for her poor nerves." So she's probably closed for business til Monday noon, I'm praying.

Taffy and I are basically prisoners here. B's run out of dog food and there's almost nothing in the beach house but protein bars and more boxed wine. B thinks it's cute to try on all my clothes on Instagram and she keeps stretching out all my tops with those ridiculous fake cans of hers. And she's not showering enough. Girl, a "quick dip in the ocean" is not doing anything for your stank.

Can someone call Protective Services? Taffy and I are still underage. I think. I'm frightened what B might do.

Yup, it's 11 hours later, and Big B is under for the duration. If I could make sure she stays asleep, Taffy and I would make a run for the Pacific Coast Highway.

This is what I look like, in case anyone wants to find me. Brave face on, whatevs.

Hey y'all!

I woke up soooo refreshed this morning and spent all afternoon doing some restorative stretching. This girl is feeling centered! And really good about things.

Only prob is I can't find Taffy. Can't tell if she ran out or is just playing hide-n-seek, the furry little bag-of-tricks!

At least you still have your Fall 1996 Gap wardrobe!

Happier days...

She’s really taking this quarantine seriously, isn’t she?

Barbie! Why are you smoking?

I can’t. I just can’t.

That Malibu bitch.

She's a prostitution whore! And Ken is a gay hustler on Santa Monica Blvd.

They always told me I was Barbie’s sister ... but then the {sob} truth came out ... I was .. I was .. her secret daughter ...

R6 Midge looks anorexic and bowlegged.

I have an official repro of Malibu Barbie on my doll shelf. I also have a Magic Earring Ken as well.

And Gap Barbie, too???

Now I remembered why I wanted a telescope when I was eight. Or a double set of Legos, like my brother. I've been blocking those damn Barbie nightmares for decades!

Funny how Ken and Allan opted to be quarantined together over at the Sherwood home while Allan's parents are stuck on that cruise ship.

Hey Ken, stay away from that infected Barbie bitch. Stink fish extraordinaire, buddy. I got some extra room here for you to shelter in place bro

Bitch, please.

Hi gays. It's me again,Midge.

WTF is going on over there at that beach house? B. just Instagrammed a photo of empty Franzia boxes and the message, "Come back, little Sheba."

Never mind. How cute do I look here? Sometimes people tell me that I'm really the photogenic one.

Bored with the quarantine, Allan is trying to convince Ken to do a scene with him on his new OnlyFans site.

Has anyone, perchance, seen a little orphan boy from Darfur running about?

Midge, Christie, Teresa, and I had gotten bored with this quarantine thing so we decided to play dress up. We dug into my spacious closet and dressed up as some of our favorite movie characters. Guess who I am?

Just checkin' girl: You getting your area waxed during this cononatine?

Yaaaas hunty. Gurrrrrl, you know it.

I don't know, R47. Some drag queen?

Whoever you is.... gurl, that dress makes you look big as a beach house.

You need some social distancing. From the all-you-can-eat buffet.

Malibu Barbie or Malibu Beached Whale?

Days Barbie would prefer to forget...

With all that sun and heat, does your pussy stink?

I keep coming back to watch the dance number.

How did I end up on the wrong side of PCH??

The Big B hasn't come out of her room in days. The liquor store stopped deliveries last week.

I'm a little worried. But also kind of relieved.

Malibu? Beach house? Long, silky hair? Glamour & fashion? A media sensation & TV star? Adored by loyal fans? Role model? Long famous?

There is only one, and it ain't Barbie.

r37 You're her daughter AND her sister!