Andy Cohen's butthole

It starts in NJ and ends in NYC.

It’s a coin slot, I have it on good advisement.

Just stop OP.

[quote]Andy Cohen's butthole

Alex, may I have "Frighteningly Uninteresting Things" for $2000, please?

[quote] What state is it in?

Rode Dryland

Loosey-anna.

It's like a glass of water!

It's a mangled mess of bushiness growing out of,and surrounding, a gaping starfish of abused flesh.

Well utilized I imagine!

Are we talking peak or off-peak hours?

Like the Grand Canyon by now.

Smells like Anderson Cooper's fingers.

Huge Hollow tunnel

Glazed

It isn't a state yet, it is still classified by the government as a "territory" until it drafts a constitution that is approved by the residents, of whom there are many, though of transient status.

Don't look at me - I'm also a power bot.

R18 Tony nailed it...

India and Pakistan are at war over it.

It has been deemed a nuclear exclusion zone.

Total coinslot

It's wonky like his eye

The tattoo around it says “Watch What Happens”

A one-eyed monster

Anus Horribilis

Hmmmm.... Nope, not interested at all.

It's like that last slice of pizza that has been sitting there in the box for awhile.

The whole group has been eyeing it for awhile, but nobody wants to touch it and everybody doubts how fresh it is anymore.

You mean his bumphole?

I thought Anderson Cooper is Andy Cohen's butthole.

Fluid

Shared by everybody.

Like a vile pit of vipers!

Loose as mother goose!

Like sweet potato pie...

Delicious!

Arizona, apparently.

State? How about planet?

Squashed tomato

My hole is pristine! Since I only top, it has never been penetrated. I mean, just look at me.

i'd EAT IT . SUCK HIS TOES TOO .

Numb from the copious booty bumps of coke to avoid having his septum collapse. On the plus side it makes double penetration by the Instahos with dreams of WWHL bartender breakthrough gigs easier

I think that hole is locked down tight, a victim to an unnatural attachment to his mother and a world of Jewish guilt and anxiety.

Functionally obsolete.

Absolutely right, R48. So much shit spews from this man's mouth, that he no longer needs an asshole.

It's just like him - desperate for attention.

I thought he was a top?

In his biography, he openly discusses the problems he had with a bad hemmorhoid, which may or may not later have been surgically corrected. I seem to recall him later talking about more 'rhoid problems on his TV show. I'm GUESSING that this is why he's a Top.

r51 I have two friends who say otherwise. One is a well-hung total top who fucked him and then took a selfie with his emmy in his bedroom lol.

Salt-and-pepper bushels of hair ring this ancient Great Rift Valley, offering shade to all species who seek it. It's an important watering hole for all of the native wildlife...

Y’all jealous bitches because I bought a baby and you didn’t

He's a TOP! He fucked Lance Bass's bootyhole!

It's not a safe space.

Someone should tweet this thread to Andy!

I'd eat him out tbh.

r59 - oh he is reading it or has read it. His people have google alerts for his name.

Mixes meat and milk. Not kosher.

Has it tightened up since childbirth?

Super Fund Site

I don't know what his poopydoops looks like, but I have it on good authority that this is his jar of lube.

It's world famous. Teresa Giudice has seen it.

She's a total top so intact for a 50 year old.

The only time Andy has ever topped is when he spins a dreidel...

Like Snuffleupagus in reverse

I suspect it is a vile pit of trollery.

After a night out.

If you slide him a $20, he will tell you the entire sordid tale

More like this r71

My hole is skanky, dark and deep,

But I have Grindr dates to keep,

And lines of coke to snort before I sleep.

Which one?

R64 Beat me to it! BIGGER and more toxic than Love Canal.

It is plucked and powdered

It probably talks, and has teeth too.

Is on it's last dreidel

Let’s put it this way - it has an echo.

It's drier than a Triscuit in an old lady's cupboard!

He is a respectable Dad now, I am sure his wild days are in the past. He never seems tired or worn out by partying, so I tend to believe he lives a pretty clean lifestyle.

Andy lives in the West Village where there are many full service man spas where he can get his pie hole waxed, bleached, and de-loused. I am sure with his income, he can afford an army of anal rejuvenators to cater to his needs.

Don’t know.

Yeah R82, sure!

It has crowd control barriers.

Door to hell

This?

Am I the only one who finds Andy hot? I'd fuck him.

Yes r89

You are completely alone in that one

As big as...

R89 = Andy Cohen

[quote] What state is it in?

Okla-HOLE-ma.

This.

Right, R94. Andy Cohen beats Richard Gere by upping the ante from one gerbil to two entire adult raccoon.

Are you sure about that?

LOL R94

Andy brings new meaning to "feed the beast", since only the largest dildos will do the job these days.

Andy prefers to call it his "boi mussy" even though he's actually 60 years old!

I too find Andy sexy and fuckable.

He is sexy and very fuckable. But no way would I want to stick around long after we finished. The narcissism is too great.

It'd be like tossing a hot dog out an open window.

I'm sure before he leaves his house for his nightly prowl he's scrubbed that poontang well and FDSed it into a stupor.

[quote] FDSed it into a stupor.

Bette Midler is posting here. Right?

Or a plagiarist!

Lol to the poster who said Andy is a respectable dad now....he flew with a newborn because dadddy wanted to go to art basel for his yearly dose of cuban cock.

[quote] It’s a coin slot, I have it on good advisement.

And I have little doubt that it must be loaded with silver dollars before anyone is allowed to get near it.

Confetti shoots out of it when it gets excited.

Hell, considering it's Andy Cohen his asshole probably has a paper money changer attached to it.

It doubles as an ATM for his various Dom tricks. Also hands out EBT vouchers.

He has HORRIBLE comedic timing! He can't set up and deliver a joke if his life depended on it! Proof that comedic timing is something you're born with. You can't learn it.

That said, I'd let that cross-eyed cutie wreck all my holes any day; any time!!!!

Young Andy Cohen.

And the award for "Taking Things a Little Too Far?"...... R111

R112 I’m being realistic

r111 You could've used "words" instead of that horror story of a pic!

Andy looks hot in AC's post at R44. Wonder how recent that pic is. Great tits.

There are no words to describe the hideousness of Andy Cohen’s anus

Good hygiene?

Stealthy Prolapse Thread

Deeper and more vast than the Mariana Trench.

I am lmao at the thought of Andy Cohen reading this thread about his asshole.

Cohen is a gay success story, a regular looking guy, who can now bang the hottest muscle man or twink, whatever he prefers, because of said success. How many ugly straight men with money have beautiful women at their disposal. I see no difference.

Warts What Happens Live

R122 Watch Warts Happen Live

Battered flat and haunted.

If you put your ear up to it you can hear the ocean.

Cohen is a successful gay man, who is quite average looking. His success gets him beautiful men of all types. This is no different than any straight Hollywood big shot having a gorgeous woman on his arm while looking like Harvey Weinstein or worse.

I could only find a picture of his ass cheek

he is super cute. the first time I saw him on tv a few years ago I had to double take on him. Handsome cute sexy guy.

You know those underwater cameras that they have to show guys groping for catfish in riverbank holes?

Same images.

It tastes like Costco pizza.

You know Andy is going to read this. He acts like Datalounge is a vile pit or whatever but you know he trolls.

R131 I think Andy already posted at R128

Like most people at?

r110 lol that was before he started wearing lifts. Cohen claims he is 5'9". If that is the case the other guy in the picture is 7'3"

He seems so wholesome and so "baseball and apple pie" to me, so when he implies anything sexually suggestive, I always get uncomfortable and cringe. Whenever Anderson is on and they talk about going on a date, when they first met, I absolutely CANNOT visualize either one of them fucking after the date. (Which they didn't, but if they had, i cant even build a fantasy in my head of the two of them passionately getting it on.)

R135 He seems like a Tina Pass Around Party Bottom to me

Here's a recent picture on a busy weekend.

[quote] He seems so wholesome

Wholesome? Dear God, he comes off about as sleazy as a Vegas pimp.

That's not confetti, r6.

This is the greatest thread title on DL

I agree. I've have zero knowledge about the life or career of Mr. A.C. but my interest has been aroused to the extent that I want to explore it in depth ( hee hee).

He's 51 and ripe verging on rot. It's all about to go to seed very quickly but at the moment there is no denying that he is handsome and very fuckable. There seem to be 5 Andy haters on DL who are obsessed with slagging on him. Such bitter loser queens.

There is nothing fuckable about him r144

I said it before, Andy is an average looking guy with extraordinary success which makes him go from a 6.5 to a 9.5 in the eyes of many a pretty gay man. Simple math. He keeps his body in good enough shape with the help of a personal trainer and dietician which is very convenient and makes it more likely that he will remain in decent shape for a man of his age. He has all the advantages cash can buy.

I think he has an adorable face and cute personality. I love his voice, I've always loved that effeminate voice on guys. Would plow that ass

All those photos of donuts are making me hangry!

R146 and R147 is Anderson Cooper

It's not called the Clubhouse for nothing.

I wonder if Andy frequented the sex parties of Lou Maletta back in the day. He would have loved the leather sling in the back. Or is that more Anderson's territory?

r144 - Only 5? I think your count is off dear.

I’m pretty sure this is him

R154, you would be wrong. Andy has one of those baboon butts at this point!

He's tearing page out of Gwyneth Paltrow's playbook and selling a candle that smells like his freshly misted dewy-pink bunghole.

Smells like shit.

R57 yeah, I thought I read an article somewhere where he said that Lance Bass was his bottom bitch.

[quote] I thought I read an article somewhere where he said that Lance Bass was his bottom bitch.

In a situation where Andy and Lance Bass were engaging in anal, Lance being the bottom bitch probably meant that he more frequently took the wider end of the double-headed dildo.

Used and abused!

R158 that’s a good one, that’s funny

What state is it in?

New TRAMPshire

Zero bulge and a full camel toe

Andy would bottom for Billy Porter so that says a lot

Most hilarious thread in awhile!

Not as much love for Anderson’s butthole?

I heard it yodels after a good pounding.

Bump

It's getting its own show next season: The Real Hemorrhoids of West Village

that cute gay hockey player fuckd it into easter…..Phat Anus.

Its state is one of eager anticipation.

[quote]Andy Cohen

Cunt

[quote]Smells like shit.

So does his “career”.

It looks like Mitch McConnell’s chin

I’m pretty sure this is it

It smells like cocaine, Crisco and latkes.

Andy lives on Horatio Street in the Village and one of the doormen in his building is a super hot Eastern European muscle dude. I would imagine he is being paid a nice size tip to service Andy from time to time.

R176 “Be vit back muzt check the somesing in Mistur Coham apartsment.”

Andy Cohen no longer hunts for dick after becoming a father. He has matured.

R178 = Andy Cohen

andy pays well due to the plethora of hemmoroids that one must bypass to get to his vagina......alleged

Sometimes it straddles state lines.

What state is it in?

TexASS

He’s one of those gross bottoms who thinks his asshole is self lubricating and says things like “you’re making me so wet” 🤮

[quote]andy pays well due to the plethora of hemmoroids that one must bypass to get to his vagina......alleged

He refers to his hemorrhoids as "speed bumps."

He refers to his hemorrhoids as collateral damage.

The most thrilling thing about it is that it can shoot you through to the Gamma Quadrant of our galaxy!

[quote] but at the moment there is no denying that he is handsome and very fuckable.

"No denying"?? WTF???

Honey, if [italic]you[/italic] happen to find a leathery midget with severe strabismus, a shit-eating grin, and Brenda Vaccaro's voice both"handsome and very fuckable," then, well, good for [italic]you,[/italic] Mary. Those are YOUR tastes.

But don't presume to speak for anyone else here.

Andy is a super successful gay man who is enjoying all the perks of his success when choosing his sexual partners. Andy seems to prefer quantity over quality, but with his wealth he can afford quantity and quality. Why should he settle?

Do you think his tricks compare notes on his and Anderson Cooper's assholes?

I love this thread

[quote]He’s one of those gross bottoms who thinks his asshole is self lubricating

That's because he's convinced it creates its own natural anal emollients.

Let me revise myself, because I forgot one crucial thing:

Honey, if you happen to find a [bold]FIFTYSOMETHING[/bold] leathery midget with severe strabismus, a shit-eating grin, and Brenda Vaccaro's voice both "handsome and very fuckable,"....

[quote] Anderson Cooper’s butthole

It's never been the same since delivering the baby. The doctor wanted to deliver via C-section, but Andy and his doula insisted on a natural birth...

[quote] It's never been the same since delivering the baby. The doctor wanted to deliver via C-section, but Andy and his doula insisted on a natural birth...

And Andy knows that a serious gay never gets an episiotomy.

his fukhole has bedbugs???

Andy only tops when Mike Pence is in town

[quote] Teresa Giudice has seen it.

As if! Andy's butthole emits a rainbow smoke signal if a female even comes within two feet of his hole.

If you have the right looks and body, his butthole will shoot out 50s and 100s.

R111 - Your pic cause me and (I’m sure I’m not alone), profound physical, mental, and visual harms. Therefore, we will be sending you all of our therapy bills as we try to overcome said harms, most especially the effort to try to unsee THAT THING.

I imagine it’s coated in the same alabaster pancake that CNN spackles Anderson Cooper’s face with.

R199 That’s Andy’s Grindr pic

If Andy thought Datalounge was a vile pit of trollery before, I wonder what he thinks about it after this thread!

I'm Gabe, the flight attendant, saying "Your Trash" to each of the passengers as he collects their litter and gives them an icy grin.

Wrong thread!

R203 I feel Andy has probably had a flight attendant named Gabe.

R202 he’s probably excited that he has more replies than Anderson’s butthole thread.

[quote] I'm Gabe, the flight attendant, saying "Your Trash" to each of the passengers as he collects their litter and gives them an icy grin.

Fixed it for ya', R203...

I'm Gabe, the flight attendant, saying "You're trash" to Andy Cohen as he collects his jizz and gives him an icy grin.

Male, first-class flight attendants refer to Andy's butthole as the "Staff Lounge".

This should give you an idea.

Andy is very supportive of the gay community and expects a little more respect now that he is a senior member of the community. His butthole is no more stretched out than many of the DL queens on this site, whether by a BBC or a Jeff Stryker dildo which surprisingly lasts for decades if you care for it properly.

R209 I happen to know on good advisement that the painting should be the other way around to be accurate. Ms. C is more Top than Bottom. The Coop is an aggressive bottom.

[quote] If Andy thought Datalounge was a vile pit of trollery before, I wonder what he thinks about it after this thread!

The same as he thinks about anything and everything: "How can this get me even more attention?"

Andy's butthole is catnip to man and feline

200+ posts of snark about Andy's butthole. You ladies doth protest too much, methinks

I wonder if he rims himself.

I wonder if we’ll make it to Andy Cohen’s Butthole: Part II?

We have too r216! The world needs a “Andy Cohen’s butthole...continued” thread!

Worn by the maintenance crew in Andy's building.

A gherkin pickle doesn't fill you up too much

[quote] I wonder if he rims himself.

You just know he would if he had a 20-inch tongue.

Maybe he can. While reading out the Thirst tweets, Andy did say that he'd won a long tongue contest in Miami.

It itches, it twitches, and one day shall require stitches.

It was designated a UNESCO World Heritage Site for its conservation of biological diversity and for its architectural innovation over the decades.

You bitches would eat it!

Aaron Shock's ass is what Andy pays his trainer to have, but sadly you can't turn 2 glatt kosher pancakes into a bubble butt.

Unkempt. Andy is a top into twinks and twunks.

BUMP

R209 Oh Dear Lord, just the mere thought of it

R223 that’s a good one, that’s funny

It's a world class destination for sperlunkers. Although once, a Thai youth football team got lost inside of it and it took an international, humanitarian effort to get them out.

speLunkers

Tea is Andy likes Twinks and Bondage.

Andy doesn't breathe through his lungs like the rest of us. He instead has gills on his hole and it needs to extract oxygen from copious amounts of semen and gossip in order to survive.

It is one of the 13 portals to hell.

R234 touché

Does it have its own zip code?

R236 No but there is a toll booth and it takes Easy Pass.

R237 that’s a good one, that’s funny

Ms. Cohen’s butthole attended a jockstrap fashion show in the Village.

Andy has a golden life. The best sex money can buy and a good friend in Anderson who doesn't judge him, although people on DL feel the need.

Hi Andy R240!!

the hot studs in nyc all sit on his face

he digs when they open theyr fukhole wide and he fuks them with his long thick tongue...…(think hockey player......

Currently not in the greatest of conditions!!

RIP Andy Cohen’s Butthole which we found out tonight in the ANDY IS POZ thread is hairy.

R244, I think we all knew it was hairy.

CUOMO 4 PREZ !!!!!!!!!!!

I don't believe he's a top. The nelliness; the addiction to soaps and reality bitches; the wanting to be a mommy...

If he tops then it's reluctantly.