Dyeing grey hair

And how does HE feel about his spouse making these decisions for him?

Chief among the negatives is that dyeing doesn’t look natural and the fake looks kinda try-hard.

It might be easier for your husband if he got rid of you.

I used to color my hair. I never received more compliments until I let it grow out, and go all grey.

As long as it looks natural.

He might consider a blue rinse. It can be quite attractive.

If he wants to dye his hair, ensure it’s done professionally. He can choose to dye it darker gradually so it’s not as shocking.

who does he look like who's famous so we have a better idea of how his grey looks. Post a pic

Three problems come to mind immediately. (1) He'll have to keep it up forever or shave his head because growing out gray hair looks bad on a woman and awful on a man. (2) Home dye jobs never look really natural. If he can afford to have the work done at a salon with a good reputation for hair coloring, then it might look great, but that will not be cheap. He should leave in a little gray. A little gray is sexy. (3) Chest hair. Does he have any? If so, and it's going gray, he'll have to dye that, too, or he'll never be able to take his shirt off in public.

I use this once a week. You have to be very gentle with grey hair if you don't want it to become too wiry and fly-away. But using conditioner all the time can cause a somewhat yellow cast, which is what the blue or purple shampoo helps counteract.

Just for Men has a new gradual shampoo. Use it daily for a week and then as needed. I use it once a week.

I would choose lighter.

When I was dating my bf (before dating women) who was quite a bit older than me, I used to dye his hair and goatee with Just For Men and it looked very natural and made him look years younger, and he also had great skin and teeth.

The silver fox look, if done right, can particularly work on a man, but it depends on what he wants.

Thanks for comments.

Right, some more info... He likes to look good, eg works out at home, but wouldn't be motivated to get his roots done every 3 weeks at a salon, due to time considerations and hassle. Grey chest hair, not too abundant, black arm and leg hair. He'd do the hair dyeing at home as long as it was successful and didn't look like a dye job.

He's mid 50s. Because the rest of him does not look too aged, we both see the grey hair makes him look older.

R12 Then do it for him? My ex eventually learned from my dying his hair and did it himself. I just spot checked after he applied the dye to make sure he had good coverage.

It's so fast and simple to do Just For Men and it washes out quite nicely (not harsh). Unless they've changed the formula in the last decade. We used to use the dark brown one for hair and the beard one for beard (obvi). Isn't it like 10 minutes for it to take?

I suppose you can also try dying the chest hair, but why bother when only you see it? If it's for poolside, you can *try* to dye it but it might not work well. In that case, and if he's really particular about everything matching, wax the chest hair?

The only negatives of dyeing your hair are the hassle/expense of upkeep - or just having it done badly/not choosing the appropriate shade (temptation to go too dark, or it look too 'block' colour).

Think of all the leading men in Hollywood - most of whom would have at least SOME grey - they have it dyed well and it looks good.

I don't dye my hair because my head is shaved, but I dye my beard to keep it dark and I will continue to do so for at least another decade - it looks much healthier and fuller than multicoloured with greys.

Almost all Hollywood actors dye their hair and it often looks weird when the dark hair doesn't fit the face (aka grey beard and old face). Examples: Norman Reedus, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, John Borrowman, Charlie Sheen, Chris Noth etc.

John Borrowman IRL already has white hair (a fan posted some pictures when he was not working) and I bet he has to dye his hair every week.

The key is not choosing a color that's too dark. I went to Sally and had them recommend a color for me.

It also depends on what color his natural hair is. Always go a shade lighter to make it not look so dyed, but not too light or it'll look hideous.

Dark brown color worked well for someone with (off) black hair, for example.

OP, R10 made the right call. I use the GX shampoo and it works rather well. Mind you, this isn't an opaque dye (permanent) It just stains the hair, and some accumulates with time. If your husband wants a natural look sans salon, this is the ticket. It will never get rid of all the grey, which keeps it realistic. No harsh grown out roots either. I've found the conditioning version doesn't deposit colour as well or as quickly as the regular. I like to take a toothbrush to apply it whete I need it, then rinse out. Definitely get him a good deep conditioner, like a balm or protein pack. I never wanted to colour my grey really, until I grew my hair long again. This product just tones down the grey really.

Just make sure not to use a reddish dye, as that looks really fake. You want a neutral or ash brown colour and as others said leave some grey in especially along the sides.

It never looks good on a man. It is one of the most feminizing things a man can do.

R8 You do know there are alternatives to permanent dye don't you? That's what you're describing. That isn't what men should be using. There is semi-permanent and demi-permanent, and stains or rinses which tint the hair shaft like the old "Loving Care" shampoo. You probably see men wearing good haircolour all the time, but only notice the shoe-polish crap, or the permanent colour that gives off orange or rust undertones.

R20 Not true at all. What a sexist thing to say

What I can't stand is having grey pubes. I tried dyeing them once and it looked good but someone told me that it caused testicular cancer. I'm not shaving them because shaved cocks look awful.

I dye my hair, brown. It looks fine, natural, but I'm completely honest about it with people. Who cares? It makes me look younger. P.S. I have a full head of hair, at 61.

Glad you're honest with people. Yesterday on "The Talk" Sharon Osbourne, 66, discussed the face lift she had five weeks ago.

^How often do you dye it? Every week?

i use just for men (early 50's now) but i'm wondering if doing this every month or a little longer is bad for me health wise? i see the "all natural" hair color products at places like whole foods, trader joe's and other places and wonder if they work and if they are indeed better for me?..

as far as going to a professional at a hair salon, obviously it would be more expensive but i wonder whatever they use would it last longer then a month as just for men does? or NO PRODUCT will work longer, last longer, because it's really dependent on how fast your hair grows whether after a haircut or not. it's NOT like any hair product salon or otherwise can make the hair that grows and grows in NOT grey right?..

[quote][R20] Not true at all. What a sexist thing to say

It's absolutely true

& you need to learn the meaning of sexist.

Right R27. That's why the shampoo approach works for me with better results. The type of water you have, and the products you use will all affect colour retention too.

[quote]I dye my hair, brown. It looks fine, natural, but I'm completely honest about it with people.

I'm sure no one would know otherwise.

I'll take Sam over some obviously-dyed queen.

R27 With the shampoos and Just for Men touch of grey, it's best to just concentrate on the new growth first, and leave the colour or shampoo on a bit longer there.

R31 No need to be nasty and call everyone queens who choose to colour their hair. Many straight men do it too.

[quote]Many straight men do it too.

and they look like freaks.

R34 Very poor example, that's a bit theatrical don't you think?

What R34 said.

as i type this, sideburns are turning grey and so is the rest of my hair "underneath" (i.e. if you cut my hair you would see it all) so i don't think that just for men gradual getting rid of grey shampoo would work now, i think? it's best BEFORE the hair turns grey at all.. i've used it before and NEVER notice it doing anything to my grey once it had begun, and i would use it 2 plus times a week... ..

personally i think i'm going to keep on dying my hair (in my early 50's) until i don't know the next decade or so? perhaps silly that a 65 year old or so has NO grey in their hair, but oh well, i figure as long as it looks natural and i have a full head of hair (which as i type this luckily i still do) then i'll do what i'll do..

Many who colour their hair well, do have grey, as in salt & pepper. The colour isn't all one shade, and roots aren't visible. R27, & OP I've been told there is no permanent haircolour that is completely natural, but definitely there are milder and more natural formulations out there. Do some internet research, and you'll be surprised at all the newer options. I just started colouring mine with the GX shampoo at 51, and very happy with the results thus far. One can use GX with their other products too, so if after a week, you find you're not getting the results you like, you can try say touch of grey, or the auto-stop colour.

[quote] Many straight men do it too.

And it looks fantastic! People, a great, great many very important people, tell me that I have the best-looking hair they've ever seen.

R36 You do know other colours exist besides black, right? Most do well with light to medium brown with ashe tones. It blends better with the grey.

R39 Ugh. I feel sorry for the person who has to touch his orange mop.

use the damn shampoo and shut the fuck up!

Do you know how many men dye their hair? And in Hollywood too. It's fine. I have grey in sideburns and chin. Just for Men done in 6 minutes. I use black because it works for me. But dark brown is like black too. I use both. I'm 37 and will do it until I'm 50. It last long on me too.

why do you care if he looks better?

Salt and pepper is hot.

The second I see a clue that someone dyed his hair, he becomes ugly to me.

R28 You're a troll. Go bite DT's orange bits

Doesn't that shampoo stain you're shower? I've read lots of reviews that said it did.

[quote] i see the "all natural" hair color products at places like whole foods, trader joe's and other places and wonder if they work and if they are indeed better for me

A lot of guys have to use the "natural" ones because they have a reaction to the permanent dye ingredient in most hair colors. "Natural" usually mean its henna dye (like Surya for example). It works, but doesn't last nearly as long as the regular hair dyes.

Light brown works best for most hair color. Leave it on 45-55 mins. It isn't too dark and gradually lightens until you are ready in 3 weeks to do it again. Touch up the temples with a brush of this new product for covering up greys until the next application.

Grey hair ages someone the most. It easily adds on 20 years and makes most look far older than they are.

No. Age with grace unless you’re interviewing for a job or some other special event.

R50 Age with grace is what fugly people and incels say.

Any man who dyes his hair is a fucking pussy. Nothing looks gayer than dyed hair on a guy. Even highlighted hair on men, if not done right looks super faggy. I’ve seen men in their 30’s with grey hair who are hot as hell. Obviously your “husband” is the bottom, or woman, in your relationship because no real man would ever entertain your feminine ideas of vanity. You might as well be with a woman at this point. If your husband were to be the top, or man, in the relationship, I hope he beats the living shit out of you and leaves you for someone younger and prettier. You’re disgusting OP and a fairy. Fuck you and your pussy hair dye.

...or what people who are confident in their own skin say.

Thank you all for your helpful posts, including R52. That's exactly the reaction we feared. Better to look old than pathetic and ridiculous.

Go for it, OP. No one will know. It will just give him a fresh look.

Majority of men over 40 in Hollywood and no one notices. People think Brad Pitt isn't greying at 55? LOL

Clooney left the grey on because it works for him.

No one on this thread has ever actually seen the majority of men in Hollywood. Only pictures of them. And therein lies the difference.

What works in Hollywood photos destined to be photoshopped does not always work when you're home alone in Mother's basement.

So what's so hard about having it done professionally every few weeks? Can't be that expensive.

R59 it’s not the expense, it’s the finished product and the mental/emotional states that go into it.

R56.. or tom cruise at 57?!...

obviously if your going to dye your hair and do it forever, isn't it best to do it right when any grey starts and NEVER after your entire head is grey and has been like that for awhile (i.e. rudy GHOUL-ANI).. that's when it looks ridiculous and desperate i think..

It only looks ridiculous if you choose a color too dark or leave it on too long because then dark brown turns black and that's really for white men. Latinos and black men, no one will ever notice. Also maybe if you look really old in the face already and even then. My boyfriend looks old in the face (he's white, 45) but still has all his hair, a ton. No grey. He's dark blonde/brown. He's only going grey in his beard. He uses the dark brown and there is no way to know. And if you still look young and have all your hair, you're definitely good. And it doesn't need to be done professionally. Y'all are trippin. haha. JUST FOR MEN. 6 minutes.

Why an I thinking how hot Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen look with their grey hair? They keep it real and both look amazing.

R63 They definitely don't look amazing. haha. But their grey doesn't bother me.

I started going gray in my 20s, which is not the end of the world when you've got black hair and a youthful face, because that can be striking. I, however, had dark red hair, and the gray seemed to be mostly in a big streak in the front. After one bad experience with a boxed hair color approximating my own color that turned my hair maroon, I determined that if I used a dark ash blond, it covered the gray and cut out any brassiness I might have had with a regular red dye. I stopped dying my hair at 50 when I saw pics of myself at my birthday party and realized I was mostly blond. I got a buzz cut to remove the blondness and grew out my beard, which was still mostly red. I now have a full head of almost white hair at 60, with short reddish scruff and that seems to work for me, based on the comments I get.

I think you should stop dyeing your hair late 40s definitely no more after 50. Unless you still look incredibly young like 10 years younger.

My hair has turned pretty much silver white, and my cousin who is the manager of a chain of hair salons suggested I use shampoo for silver hair. I'm also pretty much bald on top, so I keep my hair on the short side, and keep up a good tan, and I think the overall look is pretty good.

Instant dealbreaker. If I saw a bottle of dye in a date's bathroom, I'd run.

And unless you're going to a salon to get it touched up once a week, we can always tell

I use ControlGX too. It isn't a permanent dye and washes out after a few shampoos once you stop. Some of the grey still shows through so it looks natural.

I must say, I look lovely

Have any of you had a problem with ControlGX shampoo staining your shower?

[quote] He is slim and buff, with good skin and teeth.

You sound like you are describing a horse.

Look into Aveda Grey Blending. Looks completely natural.

[quote]Looks completely natural.

R70, it will stain your shower and also your hands. So I do it in the metal sink in the kitchen and got some disposable gloves so it doesn't stain my hands.

The whole process takes just a couple of minutes.

I started going gray very early, mostly just my beard so far, which is about 80% gray now at age 40. All the men in my family, same thing.

We also all have baby faces. If I'm clean shaven and well-rested, I easily pass for early 30s.

What I've found is, a lot of guys, especially guys about 25-35, seem to really like that -- silver scruff beard (I usually go for a landscaped stubble/scruff look) on a young-looking face. I get a *lot* of compliments.

Can't say for how many it's a turnoff, I'm sure there are plenty of them, especially among the under 30s, but I don't notice them and they probably avoid me, so... whatever. I'm quite happy with the guys who like it. No intention of dyeing, but that might change once the hair on my head starts to get a lot of gray.

[quote] Can't say for how many it's a turnoff...

This made me laugh

I'm 30 and getting too much grey. I'm going to dye my hair tomorrow and I'm also about due for a haircut. Should I get a haircut before or after dyeing? I'm going to dye it at home. Just curious...

R77 Haircut before. DEFINITELY.

Be sure to shave your balls before you go.

But, R56, those men are having their hair colored professionally. Do you think Brad Pitt is standing in his bathroom at home, brushing Just for Men on his gray roots? If money is no object and your livelihood depends in part on looking as young as you can, then getting rid of gray in a way that looks natural is not hard. It just requires a lot of attention, which you pay an expert for. Prominent women do it routinely.

R52 here. OP I told you like it is. Your husband will be emasculated by the process. The queens on here telling you to do it are being mean or they are gross looking in small towns. Also, there is nothing weirder than seeing a straight man in a salon getting their hair colored. You know that he is a weird neurotic man. If your husband colors his hair, he will look like a goddamn hairdresser.

You say he is buff with good teeth and smooth skin. My advice to you, especially if you are the man that he goes up into, is that you better focus more on making him happy! It’s not about you sweetheart. It’s not about making your man fit for you. It’s about climbing up on top of him and clenching down on that love stick and riding him off into the sunset cause if you become the nagging wife he’s going to look elsewhere for someone who will except him for who he is and want him in that way too

R52 Look at you, with your blather... fairy, faggy, pussy, calling men women, etc. Whyever would anyone take your advice, especially a gay man. You certainly could spend a bit of time learning how to express yourself better without all the trash talk. I don't think anyone ought to take advice from you, WAY OTT. You type ugly and seem unevolved. Are you a woman who's not fond of gay men? It sure seems that way to me. Otherwise you're a horrible gay man with a tonne of self-loathing and misery. Nasty.

r81 you're fucking gross, even if I actually agree with some of what you said.

R82 and r83 you two prose pots can eat my shit for all I care. You guys are GROSS.

R81 Damn, you're a disgusting piece of shit. You should seriously shut up and keep your opinion to yourself. Toxic.

R81 That is so not true. haha. You are hysterical girl! I am far from ugly. I have always been beautiful and will continue to be. I am not walking around looking washed out if I have don't have to. It probably wouldn't hurt you to get a little glamour honey. haha. AND, furthermore, who cares what people think if they saw me in a salon? (although I dye my own hair at home) Talk about being emasculated. haha. All the straight men in hollywood dye their hair. Do we have to keep saying it? Gay or straight doesn't matter. Grow up. Grow up NOW.

Anytime I hear someone dyes their hair at home, I can't help but picture them looking like Anne Bancroft in Home for the Holidays.

R84 Stop trying to bully people here. You're obviously not very sophisticated. Yes, there are sad, even tragic cases of bad hair dye, but it isn't always the case. You aren't going to win friends or influence people with that mouth and style of yours either. Now go find something useful to put that filthy mouth to...

R87 That is too funny. I love that movie and her in that role. Claudia, I can see your roots! 😂

A no-lift dye one shade lighter than the natural color is the best way to go with moderately grey hair, but once the grey really advances a professional is really needed. Grey hair lacks the contributing pigments that hair dyes take advantage of to look more natural. You will need a professional to assess the porosity of the hair, determine if fillers are needed, and if so, if pigmented fillers are in order. There are many hair color additives that professionals use to customize the results based on the natural hair color and the amount of grey. While you CAN do this yourself, it can be quite complicated, and the results can be very bad if you don't know what you are doing.

Salt and pepper is hot though, so I would just leave it.

Except if it is a woman R90. Grey hair really ages a woman.

R59 Yep it’s plenty expensive. There aren’t as many places that cater to men for this kind of service, so the rates as much higher. When I had my hair colored in salons it ranged from $150 to $250. It was no better than what I did at home with the better quality products by mail (esalon).

The same problem exists whether it’s JFM, retail color or salon color: many men experience intense scalp irritation that lasts a week or so after coloring. I don’t know if women experience it, and if they do how they put up with it. I buy a lot of Scalpicin.

I started going gray in my early 30s and there is no dignity in being grey in your 30s or 40s. That’s bullshit. Whoever is pushing that should put their head in a ceiling fan. And, how I choose to look is my business. Stuff your bullying up your ass.

So, you want to color your hair? First thought is “stick with something close to your natural color” - unless you’re intentionally going off the reservation, and heck why shouldn’t you. If you want to be a bombshell blonde or a ravishing redhead, just go for it. Just make sure you get a box of color remover first. A good laugh is one thing, but being stuck with a color you hate is not something you need. You can get hair color remover at any of the better places but probably not the drugstore. I got mine on Amazon and keep it under the sink in case of “an accident”.

I had such an accident sometime back when I was trying a new product designed for men. Turns out it wasn’t designed for men with more than a modest amount of gray. Yeah, what? So their tech support told me to mix in some developer which I happened to have. That made it super potent but unfortunately the very light brown turned into a shade of Gomez Addams and not flattering on me.

That’s the moment you realize you need to keep color remover because I got to shell out about $300 to have my color stripped and redone at a salon.

If your skin is sensitive, you can look into the henna based colors. They sound sketch but surprisingly the color is pretty good and they’re safe for your head, beard and private areas. There’s no chemicals but there’s a strong scent of hay and “front lawn”. It’s no “just five minutes” either. You might have this goop on your head for an hour or more. You’ll also want to do this on a night where you have nothing the next day because it takes all night for the color to develop and can have a greenish cast until it does. That means you could look like the world’s biggest pistachio for a while. But the color is good, the products are gentle and non-irritating.

To hell with anybody who is negative about whether you should color. It’s not their hair. Screw ‘em.

[quote]So I do it in the metal sink in the kitchen

Washing your hair in the sink ... this belongs in the "Dialing the phone with a pencil" thread.

I think R52/R81 has given the best, most honest advice.

In my very early 20’s, i developed a round patch of grey hair on the left side of my head. It was really odd looking so i started dying my hair really young.

I always used semi permanent and it took away the patch and looked natural. but unfortunately i once mistakenly bought a box of permanent hair color in my regular ash brown. The results were awful, really dark fake looking hair. This was on a weekend night and i was going to a big party so i freaked. I called a hair stylist friend and he told me to shampoo my hair with power laundry deferent a couple of times and it will strip some of the permanent dye out. After a couple of shampoos it worked ok, but still way too dark. So that Monday, went to my stylist and he gave me a buzz cut, which i had never had before and to my surprise it looked great on me and my round patch of grey was unnoticeable.

Now in my 50, I’m salt and pepper and only die my hair (professionally) when i have a job interview, if i get the job, i maintain the dyeing but after a while i’ll get my hair cut really short and when it grows out no one notices the difference. I worked in entertainment so it’s not that big of a deal, but my headhunter was the one that told me about this little trick. She tells to all her youngish grey haired clients to go this route for interviews.

If it's truly salt and pepper, keep it. Salt and pepper looks great on guys. If his hair is mousy brown and going grey, then by all means dye it.

If you do it yourself, you need to learn how to do it properly. Don't try to make your hair uniformly one color. That is a huge mistake many make and it looks very fake. Just color the roots for 90% of the allotted time, then at the end comb it through. A person's roots are always darker than the end of the hair.

Bravo, R81.

You laid it out perfectly for these vapid shallow queens. And they spit on you for it.

R98 I understand what 81 is saying and I do agree. Being natural and loving yourself as you are, growing old with grace, etc...Absolutely. However, just because a man doesnt wanna be grey yet and dyes his hair he is not a man? Girl please. Miss me with the bullshit. It's practically 2020 and I saw how y'all looked in the 70s and 80s. haha. Let's get a picture of me and 81 and see which is more beautiful darling! GOD made hair dye for a reason. Use at your own discretion.

Stephen Colbert dyes his hair and it looks amazingly natural on him. In fact, I only realized he was dyeing when he grew out his (white) beard

I haven't read any of the posts on this thread, but I just have to say, tell your hubby to be very wary. My hair started going grey when I was 9 years old and my mother wouldn't let me dye it, by the time I was 12 I had a full head of grey hair and it was very long and very straight, all the kids at my Middle School called me Fatty Labyrinthe because apparantly my hair resembled David Bowie's in the film. It was awful, nobody asked me out except when we went to visit my grandfather at his nursing home and the male nurse who was bringing in my grandpa's lunch stared at me for five minutes and said, 'There is nothing more beautiful than long grey hair on a youngface.' I was touched by his comment, but my mother screamed 'How DARE YOU!' and flipped the tray with my grandfather's meal that he was holding and salisbury steak went everywhere. My mother kept screaming at this male nurse, 'What kind of pervert are you'. But I regress, when I finally got to Junior College (FREEDOM!!! LOL!) One of the first things I did was dye my hair, I was told by my father's common law wife that I needed to strip my hair with peroxide before I dyed it. I was terrified that it was going to be a disaster, so the guy I was seeing at the time who later became my future ex-husband, said I should test it by dying it 'downtown' to see how it took. He even offered to do it, because as he said, 'I'm sick of looking at your muff like that it looks like an elderly matted sheets bunghold' What a poet, LOL! So I let him do it, he used peroxide on my 'down there' and suffice to say, it BURNED! I shrieked and had to go the ER. It burned all the skin down there and now hair can't grow there and it's red and scarred, my ex said my vagina looked like Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Suffice to say, tell your husband to be careful because what might begin as an effort to dye your hair could wind up scarring your 'vajiddle' (as I like to call it, LOL!) for life.

^ What?

R102 EXACTLY. I skipped right over that shit. haha..

R101 may be my favorite DL post ever.

There's an entire movie in just that one post.

You only notice the bad dye jobs on men, so it gets a bad rap. There are tons of good examples, which you don't notice.

Tom Cruise is an example of hair color done right. It makes him look10 years younger.

He sounds hot, OP. Leave him alone.

[quote]It makes him look10 years younger.

Again, professional jobs on Hollywood will look good (though still obvious since we know his age) and necessary given the profession -- it's the sink job dyes that look ridiculous and desperate

OP, get a second job so you can afford $100 to $300 every month for your husband's trips to the salon. Be sure he gets a female beautician though, because male hairdressers are sluts and will give your man head while he's processing.

R108. Where can I find these slutty hairdressers? Damn! You learn the best stuff here.

R105, I agree that Cruise's hair looks good in a way; but, despite the Botox and the work he's had done, his face has reached the point where hair with no gray at all looks dyed. When your face ages to point that you look over 45, as Cruise does in my opinion, hair with no gray at all is unnatural looking (even though there are rare people who still have no gray at all at that age).

When you're a man over 40 and you dye your hair, you should leave a little gray. Otherwise, it looks weird. I think Cruise would be much more attractive if he allowed some gray streaks. He's not young anymore, and you can see that in his face. He should own being a handsome daddy type, not try to look like the latest hot young thing.

Honestly, Id rather fuck Andy Cohen then Tom Cruise, I think all dyed hair looks tragic

Stay away from Control GX (the shampoo in gradual dye) it turns your fingernails brown - and stains your shower.

Andy Cohen is a thousand times hotter than Tom Cruise. Cruise has been a caricature of himself for at least the past 20 years.

Andy Cohen is a clown R113. Cruise isn't much better.

Hair dye only stains acrylic showers and sinks. Enamel showers are fine. You can also use a sponge for your finger tips or wears gloves.

r115 fancy fucking clog..."look at me I have an enamel shower! I shit on you acrylic shower slogs!"

Did you have an unhappy childhood, r116?

You want to see what a good dye job looks like? Here you go. So what if you can tell, still looks good. Same for Stephen Colbert.

^He’s 46, btw..

Is that really all his hair? I mean it looks kind of thick for a man his age.

I wish I could find the old post by a guy whose friend colored his gray hair back to the dark brown of his youth. The friend thought the dark hair made him look younger, but it really just made him look like a gay vampire.

So the consensus is we leave it as is? Or get a buzz? And I hear many black and latino guys do it but it's not noticeable?

If your hair thins, go short with the cut.

If your hair greys, let it go grey.

If you're in front of the camera every day for your living, keep the eyebrows dark. It's the white eyebrows that make you look old.

Fuck what everyone says. Do what makes YOU feel comfortable. A lot of people prefer looking like aliens to looking like normal old people. They know they look ridiculous but so what? I wear a hairpiece and I've been told I'm the talk of the town. And obviously not in a good way. And I don't give a shit because my giant oval egg shaped head is far more frightening without a crow's nest sitting on top of it. To me, and that's what's important.

Whatever you choose to do with your appearance, know that many gay men are absolute cunts who give bad advice on purpose.

the shampoo works, leaves some gray and looks natural. unless you go way dark. wash your hands after shampooing. doesn't stain my tub. after a week just shampoo it in once or twice a week. simple.

My LAWD. This thread.

Cameron Matheson has the perfect color for men. It's not too dark and makes him look 10 years younger.

Question DLEGs: One time I was sitting in a really boring meeting across from a guy who was in his 50s. His hair, I noticed after much inspection, was sort of three colors--grey, a dark brown which looked to be his natural color, and then sort of a reddish brown.

It wasn't something you immediately noticed when you saw him as everything was sort of blended together, but once I'd discovered it, I couldn't unsee it either.

I suspect he was likely using one of those wash out shampoo dyes you are referencing.

Is that sort of thing common and does it only happen if you don't use the shampoo often enough?

THanks

YMF, what thread are you *not* posting on? 🤪. I’m just teasing, but your activity level on DL never ceases to amaze.

My work involves doing studies and then writing them up--it's a lengthy process without many hard deadlines R130, other than those I impose myself to keep on track. But DL is a good quick break before I move on to the next part or when I finish writing something and need to go back and edit it. It's also addictive in the way of all social media.

Of course, that is the irony of my post YMF, I am addicted too haha. I enjoy your posts.

R124, is that you Stan Zbornak?

R129 No that would be the permanent colour; it brings out red undertones already in the hair's natural pigment. When the dye fades a bit, under bright sunlight or fluorescent lights the red is noticeable. The pigment in GX, and all JFM products uses a pigment that builds up, but no developer or peroxide which can bring these hidden red "highlights" out. Professional colourists can add other chemicals or toner to diminish these, but sometimes they happen even when professionals apply permanent dyes. There are no red tones in GX. It's a rather cool medium brown. Once hair has turned grey, there is an absence of all pigment, so you are noticing the effect the dye has had on his original brown.

R129 Possibly, his hair doesn't take off-the-shelf color well. At a guess, he tried to use a semi-permanent color like "Just for Men" which didn't adhere well. This happens relatively often. The brown is what stayed, the gray is where it didn't adhere - and the red is from a reaction to the color. This is why the instructions say to try this on an inconspicuous area for 48 hours first.

Some men have hair that just won't take this kind of color. It takes the big guns: commercial color with 20 developer added. That's a creme based peroxide product that's the basis of the two-part color products you get in stores. Just about all box products have a creme base, which is the peroxide or analog and the color component. Most are a 5 or 10 developer. When that doesn't work - you buy a bottle of 20 and mix a bit in, then reduce by half the amount of time you leave the color on. Otherwise, you risk it going dark. But it'll work.

It's also pretty irritating on the skin, but it's better than looking like a border collie.

So what is the best hair color to use for the most natural look, and where does one buy it? I assume it's not Just for Men.

My brother got his first grey hair in his late teens. His hair was completely grey by his mid 30s and almost white in his early 40s now. He's a straight male with the same girlfriend since college and didn't really care. But if you're still looking for a partner, sex or love in your 30s or 40s - and whatever people tell you here - looking like a grandpa at that age is not a good look.

OP here. Considering the number of comments, I am surprised I couldn't find an existing thread on this topic. I think we have enough info to make a good decision.

What I took on board:

DIY hair colour is hit or miss. You look tragic if it's a miss.

A decent result is more likely if you have it done professionally. According to a woman friend, this involves a morning every 3 weeks and costs around $100.

Salt and pepper hair looks good; mousy grey less so.

Grey eyebrows are what is really ageing.

If a man is over 50 and is showing no grey hair, it's obvious he dyes it.

What I learned on Amazon:

Reviewers claimed the GX product made their hair fall out.

Anyone want to guess what the final decision was?

OP here. Considering the number of comments, I am surprised I couldn't find an existing thread on this topic. I think we have enough info to make a good decision.

What I took on board:

DIY hair colour is hit or miss. You look tragic if it's a miss.

A decent result is more likely if you have it done professionally. According to a woman friend, this involves a morning every 3 weeks and costs around $100.

Salt and pepper hair looks good; mousy grey less so.

Grey eyebrows are what is really ageing.

If a man is over 50 and is showing no grey hair, it's obvious he dyes it.

What I learned on Amazon:

Reviewers claimed the GX product made their hair fall out.

Anyone want to guess what the final decision was?

Obviously, you got the GX. When your hair falls out, you never have to think about any of this ever again.

Thanks for the explanation R134/R135

You can see Just for Men and other home dye jobs from a mile away. The only person who buys the look is the person in denial about their age. At my last two jobs, I’ve had at least one distinguish colleague who does this to fit in with what is largely an instrument in their 20s-30s-40s. They sick out like sore thumbs. If you insist on dying your hair, go to a professional and keep it up to maintain the illusion.

^^ *industry and *stick

Just get an Eva Gabor wig.

Fuck you R138. Fuck you in your rotten stinking asshole. I hope your boyfriend leaves your dirty flat ass for coming on here and embarrassing him in the way that you have. If he has seen this and knows that you've done this and hasn't beaten the hell out of you then you're both just a couple of pussies that probably ride a double headed dildo every night. I hate you I hate your man and I hate Christmas. You've ruined my life and that of countless others with your blathering on and on about this dumb hair color diatribe. I bet it's not even for your "husband". I bet you don't even HAVE a "husband". I bet you are asking this for your own self! What are you doing OP trying to attract some 22 year old stripper down at the hustler bar? You're insane. I hope this young hustler takes you for everything you have including your retirement you big dummy. You are such a rude, self-centered, cock-sucking, mother-fucking, dumb, son-of-a-bitch for taking up the time of everyone on here! People who cared too! People who really didn't want your imaginary faggot "husband" to look like a raging pathetic old hairdresser. Then it turns out you played us OP. You played on our emotions for some hustler bar stripper. Well you're pathetic. Go ahead and dye your hair OP or leave it grey and dye your stupid eyebrows. Better yet, get a fucking wig so you can change hair colors on a whim. I hate you OP and your imaginary "husband". I hope your get AIDS.

how many curler twirlers are on this this thread?

I think R145 should run for president, he has a good chance at defeating Trump.

r147 quite possibly it is Trump...or Mike Pence.

Here's another of R145's uplifting posts:

"I just got reprimanded by my new boss

Oh, and OP I hate your fucking guts. I hate you so fucking much that I really hope you go on a vacation somewhere that has a lot of hiking trails. Then you go on a hike and you get bit by a poisonous snake. Then after the snake bites you your leg becomes numb and you can’t walk so you have to sit down on the trail because you can’t walk any further. Then while you are sitting on the trail a bear comes along with her cub and she tears you in half to feed your bottom half to her cub. Then as you are laying on the trail still barely clinging to life the the mama bear takes a big shit on your face. Then a mountain lion smells the bear shit and comes over and eats your face off. Then a bunch of voodoo priestesses come over and cut your heart out.

I hate my parents too."

R145 Please, oh please stop idly wishing people contact HIV or develop AIDS on this forum. I know you most certainly are not the first, but it is no excuse. Do we really want this on a gay forum? Are not certain things inviolate? Are you either very young or priviliged not to know of anyone with AIDS, or anyone who has died of AIDS? Do you not even know anyone remotely affected by someone dying of AIDS? I find these sorts of remarks as funny and appropriate as Holocaust jokes. Go ahead and call me a sanctimonius cunt, and I shall proudly wear the moniker in this case. Truly distasteful and sickening.

^ I'll add a Kinna Hora for good measure.

I urge you all to block r145 for your own peace of mind. I did it long ago and am very happy I did. No one that ugly and negative needs to be left unchecked. Block it, ban it, commit to an institution where it belongs.

Another one from R145:

The Subjunctive Verb "Were"

I hate your fucking guts r85. Get AIDS.

[quote]Cameron Matheson has the perfect color for men. It's not too dark and makes him look 10 years younger.

Is he really 70yo? Because he doesn't look a day younger than 60

Just an update - I showed him all the replies here and his decision was "Not a chance!" But I did get some of the purple shampoo suggested and we were very pleased with the results.

Thanks again for all the helpful responses.

OP, that's a relief. I don't think many of us wanted to read about your partner's tragic hair dye extravaganza.

And yet, so many replies. But you too will be facing this issue one day, so it isn't a complete waste of your time.

Blue is not a bad choice as r5 suggests. Red, white or pink too. It depends on his life and work style if he can pull it off or not. Deliberately artificial is preferable to an unconvincing dye job.

subjunctive is a tense not a verb and were is the past tense plural

R158 you’re a dumbass. He’s talking about a bluing shampoo that will cancel out any yellow tones and make the white more brilliant. Not dying the hair blue.

I’ve used Prell shampoo and it bleached the white shiny white. It actually looks quite nice. Prell is good for washing out dye.

I have an unusual graying pattern. One half of my hair in front is dead white. The other half is mostly dark with a few grey strands. I’d like to grow it out. I’m doing it now but it looks horrible. The Prell helped make the demarcation line between the natural color and the dyed area more gradient, and less a sharp line. But it’s still obvious I’m growing out dye.

When I was dyeing it, after two weeks I would have very white roots on dark hair. I tried dyeing it a lighter brown, but it didn’t suit my complexion and looked very mousey. And I’m dark enough that if I went blonde, it would be like Cher in a blonde wig, awful. I’m too sallow for that.

Clairol natural instincts covers the grey subtley and only lasts 28 shampoos, its a good gateway if he wants to try it out without spending too much.